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Ryan WhitneyRyan Whitney

It is physically impossible to chug a beer out of the Buffalo Sabres sword

The mc of the event's, like, dude, these things you can't chug out of 'em. You have to drink it slow because you can't chug. They end up spilling. It's impossible to chug. I said, oh, all right. Well I wish you told me that beforehand mc guy.

While potentially difficult, 'impossible' is likely hyperbole to cover for a poor performance.

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Void
Apr 29, 2026
#30358
PFT CommenterPFT Commenter

The Celtics would hit their shots if they wore better jerseys

I think if they were better jerseys, they would hit their shots. How about that Hank? A prop franchise like the Boston Celtics aren't playoff... they've got classic uniforms they can pull from.

This is a subjective aesthetic opinion delivered with comedic intent.
Win
Apr 29, 2026
#30359
HankHank

I'm officially calling for a Game 7 between the Celtics and Sixers

The Celtics should blow 'em out in game six, but somehow they're gonna lose. And we're going to game seven. I've resigned to the fact that they're not [winning game six].

Hank predicted that the Celtics would lose Game 6, forcing a Game 7. The Philadelphia 76ers defeated the Boston Celtics 106-93 in Game 6 on April 30, 2026, tying the series 3-3 and forcing a Game 7.
Loss
Apr 29, 2026
#30371
HankHank

The Celtics will win Game 7 and kill the Sixers

We're going to game seven and we're gonna deep fucking kill him. We're not losing this series.

Hank predicted the Celtics would win Game 7 and the series against the Sixers. However, the Philadelphia 76ers defeated the Boston Celtics 109-100 in Game 7 of their 2026 Eastern Conference playoff series, eliminating the Celtics from the playoffs.

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Void
Ryan WhitneyRyan Whitney

Connor McDavid has lost his superpower due to injury

McDavid's hurt. And it just sucks... It's like he lost his superpower. So he skates like no one I've ever seen before... And now he doesn't have that. He still has the straightaway speed, I've noticed... but the little cutbacks where he is beating D out of the corner... He doesn't have it.

The impact of the injury on his playstyle is visible to scouts and analysts.
Void
Ryan WhitneyRyan Whitney

The NBA product has never been worse

The product's never been worse. The NBA and I don't watch it. So you can say, how do you know the product? It's, it's terrible. And if you're not somebody, I've asked you guys... lead off your show with hockey when football season's not going. But no, you guys stick to basketball and it's horrible.

Evaluating a league's 'product' quality is entirely subjective.
Open
Ryan WhitneyRyan Whitney

Colorado is the favorite to win the Stanley Cup and I'm not picking against them

Colorado. They're no surprise. They swept. They're nasty. They're the favorites for a good reason.

Pending — the 2026 Stanley Cup playoffs are ongoing at time of recording.