Takes

James Dolan staged the handshake with Spike Lee to create propaganda for the Knicks

I wouldn't put it past James Dolan. I would not at all this happens at all the time in spy movies and TV shows where you send somebody up to get long-distance snapshot of right looking like something inappropriate is happening and boom. You've got the propaganda right there.

I could beat Kevin Durant one-on-one right now because of his injury

Right now, I could probably beat him [Kevin Durant] one-on-one. I could absolutely beat Kevin Durant one-on-one right now.

Derrick Rose's 'kill yourself' comment was not a slip of the tongue

Derrick Rose said, 'everyone that thinks that it's going to stop, kill yourself.' ... He then doubled down on it. He said, 'like I said before, kill yourself.' ... When you say it twice, you don't get the slip of the tongue tag. When you double down, the slip of the tongue doesn't work anymore.

Lonzo Ball needs to fix his shot after losing to Bow Wow

If you lose to Lil' Bow Wow with no shoes on, you have to then go fix your shot. ... I know everyone says, oh, don't mess with Lonzo's game. [But] you have to then go fix your shot.

James Harden will definitely need PR 101 assistance again in the future

First up, we have a little PR 101 for James Harden, who I'm going to call my shot here. I think this isn't the last time we're going to have to do PR 101 for James Harden.

The Dunk Contest is boring because there are a finite amount of body positions possible

It's not like the dunks aren't super impressive. It's just that we've seen every dunk. It's like watching porn. There's a finite amount of body positions that the human form can get into. Eventually, you just get bored with it.

Derrick Rose should use being hacked as an excuse for going missing

He didn't tweet anything. He didn't do anything wrong on the internet. So then just say you got hacked. My life got hacked.

Draymond Green sending a dick pic is a 'nut shot' from the Warriors forward

Another nut shot from Draymond. Let me say that again. I stumbled over it. Another nut shot from Draymond.

Steven Adams should use an interpreter to avoid future controversial comments

If I'm Steven Adams, I'm bringing out an interpreter with me for the next interview that I have. Like, I know you speak English in New Zealand. But most people in America don't know that... having that interpreter that you speak through, that explains away a lot of the bad stuff that you're getting caught up in right now.

If Steph Curry loses in the finals, the public will turn on him and call him a fraud

Everybody rooted for him last year because he was the skinny kid... Now he's so confident in his abilities, people are starting to turn on him. If he loses in the playoffs or in the finals, they're going to be like, I guess he couldn't hang with the big boys. Guess he's a fraud.