PMT DB
PMT DB
Booger McFarland on Monday Night Football and the Booger Mobile
It is officially 2019 and Big Cat and PFT Commenter are back from the holiday break, which means they’ve spent roughly 76 hours watching football and eating their weight in cookies. The NFL playoffs are set, but the real story of the week was the absolute carnage of Black Monday and the dumpster fire currently known as the Pittsburgh Steelers.
Black Monday and the AFC North
The coaching carousel is spinning at a terrifying speed, and nowhere is more interesting than Cleveland. While the Bengals finally parted ways with Marvin Lewis after sixteen years of early exits, the Browns are looking like the prettiest girl at the dance for the first time ever. Big Cat is already looking ahead to a world where the Browns aren't the laughingstock of the league.
Big CatThe rest of the AFC North should be terrified of the Browns in 2019
By the way, if I'm in the AFC North next year, I'm terrified [of the] Browns. That's the big thing. I don't care who their coach is as long as his name isn't Hue [Jackson].
PFT has a very specific vision for who should take over in the Land. He’s already calling the shot on a former Super Bowl winner to fill the vacancy.
PFT CommenterMike McCarthy will be the next head coach of the Cleveland Browns
It's going to be Mike McCarthy. Yeah. He's interviewing them, I think, tomorrow. Oh, and he's got it. Yeah. It's just a formality.
Up in Denver, the guys aren't quite as optimistic about the future as long as John Elway is the one making the calls. Between the Paxton Lynch era and the Case Keenum contract, PFT thinks the legend in the front office needs to look in the mirror.
PFT CommenterJohn Elway is the primary problem with the Denver Broncos' front office.
John Elway, the problem is probably you. Because his defense is really good. They've got a really good running back. And then they go out and they get Case Keenum.
Playoff Prep and Cowboy Chaos
Looking at the Wild Card matchups, Big Cat is feeling a certain way about the Bears' path. While most people are terrified of the "Nick Foles Magic" in Philadelphia, Big Cat is leaning into the idea that facing a certain NFC North rival might have been the easier path.
Big CatI would rather play the Vikings than the Eagles in the playoffs
I actually went back and forth because, listen, I'm not on the team, so I can say this. I would rather play the Vikings than the Eagles. This is not bulletin board material. I think playing the Super Bowl champs, Nick Foles... versus playing Kirk Cousins who cannot beat anyone. Ever. Who has a winning record.
Speaking of the NFC East, Big Cat can't wrap his head around Jason Garrett’s decision-making in Week 17. The Cowboys had their seed locked in, yet they played their starters in a meaningless game against the Giants just to hit a round number in the win column.
Big CatJason Garrett is the dumbest person alive for playing his starters in Week 17
Jason Garrett wins the Are You the Dumbest Person Alive Award for playing all his starters because he desperately – now, I don't know what you think, but I think it was clear that Jason Garrett wanted to win 10 games so that when Jerry Jones goes to his office next year and is like, hey, I'm thinking about firing you, he's like, but I won 10 games.
Booger McFarland Joins the Show
ESPN’s Booger McFarland joined the guys to talk about his first year on Monday Night Football and, of course, the Booger Mobile. Booger was incredibly candid about the chemistry issues in a three-man booth and the logistical nightmare of being ten feet above the sideline while his partners are in the clouds.
He also gave some fascinating insight into the difference between coaches who adapt and coaches who are stuck in their own ways. Specifically, he pointed out how Andy Reid has evolved while his former coach, John Gruden, seems to be struggling with the modern player.
Booger McFarlandJohn Gruden loves himself too much to build the Raiders into winners
I think what you're seeing now is that John loves John. It's about John. And, you know, you get rid of Khalil Mack, you get rid of Amari Cooper. Not sure why in the hell you do that because they're two really, really good players, cornerstones you build around... I don't think he can adapt to this player in this day and age right now... He's still about coming in at 3:17 in the morning, writing his own cue cards. He's got to change that. If he can't, he won't be successful.
Booger McFarlandAndy Reid has completely reinvented his offensive coaching style to thrive in the modern NFL.
Andy Reid is a classic example of a guy that's reinvented everything he does. Think about Andy Reid at Philly. West Coast offense, dink and dunk... Now, it's RPO. It's Tyreek Hill. It's Jet Sweeps. It's Patrick Mahomes. He's changed the entire game.
Booger didn't stop at coaching. He’s already looking at the veteran market for the offseason and thinks a certain Patriots legend might be reaching the end of the line in Foxborough.
Booger McFarlandRob Gronkowski is no longer the same player and will be available this offseason
This offseason, I'd bet your money and my money, Rob Gronkowski is probably going to be available this offseason. And people are going to say, man, Gronk's available. But if you watch Gronk play, Gronk isn't the same Gronk anymore. Like he can't run the way he used to.
The interview took a turn for the legendary when the topic of mid-game bathroom breaks came up. Booger famously admitted to "letting it go" on the sideline during his playing days, and he stands by the efficiency of the move.
Booger McFarlandIt is more logical for a football player to piss their pants on the field than to miss a snap by going to the locker room.
Why would I go all the way back to the locker room and maybe miss an important snap that I can help my team? Why not just let it go and move on? ... Especially when you're in the middle of a game, the pants you have on are already sweaty anyway. They got to wash them anyway.
Trouble in Paradise and Blueprint Busters
Before heading out, the guys had to address the Antonio Brown situation in Pittsburgh. After Brown reportedly went AWOL and threw a ball at Ben Roethlisberger, PFT is convinced the era of the "Killer Bs" is officially over.
PFT CommenterThe Steelers will trade Antonio Brown
I think he's going to get traded. I think the craziest part of the story was you've got to really fuck up to get benched, to be the best player on your team and get benched during a game or for a game that would get you into the playoffs.
Finally, the guys introduced a new segment called Blueprint Busters to debunk the Twitter-brained idea that you should never pay a quarterback. Big Cat pointed out that the "don't pay your QB" rule really only applies to a very specific type of player.
Big CatThe strategy of not paying quarterbacks is only true if the quarterback is Kirk Cousins or Matthew Stafford
So essentially the argument that people are tweeting out that you shouldn't pay a quarterback boils down to just don't pay Kirk Cousins or Matt Stafford. That works. That's it... Essentially the entire theory that you should just draft a young quarterback and never pay a quarterback makes no sense because half of the playoffs are quarterbacks that are going to be paid $20 million or more.
Big CatBeing as rich as Kirk Cousins while remaining as lame as he is should be considered a crime.
Being rich and being that lame is a crime. It is a crime. ... Kirk Cousins is a crime against humanity. He should be fined $84 million for having $84 million and being lame with it.
If you need any more proof that Kirk Cousins is a crime against humanity, just remember the man grills his steaks in tinfoil.
Happy Jumpsuit January to everyone, and remember: if you see a whale in 2019, just let John McAfee do his thing.
