Brooks Koepka, Play In Games Night 1, NHL Playoffs, And Uncle Chaps Reads Roasts

The NBA play-in tournament is stupid

I've decided I'm not going to be Mr. No Fun. I'll just let the playing game happen. I'm not going to tweet that this is stupid. I'm just going to sit here and be right in my silence because... This was stupid.

The Wizards are a regular season team not built for the play-ins

The Wizards are not built for the play-ins, the regular season team. But we do get another game of play-in basketball in Washington.

You cannot win in the NBA when Robin Lopez is your go-to guy

I also think anytime Robin Lopez is like your go-to guy... You're probably not going to win that game. Doing some post moves on everyone's ass.

First-round overtime hockey is a grueling slog that uses up too much energy

What I don't like is first-round overtime hockey playoff games. Because you constantly think to yourself, you have so many more of these series to get through. And we're already playing extra hockey.

Society needs guys like Tony La Russa to protect unwritten rules

I just want to remind people, because I saw the public outcry against Tony La Russa, and I get it, but I want to remind people, If you chase off every single guy who is holding up the unwritten rules, eventually society will crumble. You need the old guy yelling at clouds. You need the Tony La Russa being like, that was Bush League for his own team.

Tony La Russa could win AL Manager of the Year

I'm also very excited for Tony. The White Sox are very good, and so Tony La Russa, he could win AL manager of the year. Which would be so funny.

Kwame Brown and Charles Barkley should have a show together

You could take Kwame Brown and Charles Barkley, put them in a truck... You could put him in comedian cars getting coffee, except it's Charles Barkley and Kwame Brown talking about how youngsters these days have it so easy in the NBA. Forget the TNT show, which is wonderful. I think we can all agree. There should at least be like 10 minutes a day of those two just going at it.

Tim Tebow is a shysty guy who is all about himself

There could be a chance that Tebow is just a really shysty guy. It's all about himself.

The entire NFC North could fit inside the landmass of Jacksonville

Did you know the entirety of the NFC North could fit inside Jacksonville? Every other city. Chicago, Detroit [In the landmass of Jacksonville]. And they only add up to, like, half of Jacksonville.

Shohei Ohtani is a rare talent we must appreciate

Shohei Ohtani is one of those rare talents where I think you just got to sit back and be like, holy fuck, I can't believe this guy's doing this. ... Shohei is getting caught up [to Ronald Acuna].

Joe Burrow will be on a mission in Week 1 against the Vikings

Hot seat, the Minnesota Vikings. Because week one, they play the Bengals, and Joe Burrow is all systems go, and he's going to be on a mission week one against the Vikings.

I could shoot the same score in the PGA Championship playing left-handed

What would you shoot if you had to play the PGA Championship left-handed? [Koepka]: Probably the same as I would right-handed, honestly. ... I have no idea. I just know just swing as hard as you can from the other side of the ball.

My performance at the Masters was one of the most heroic things ever done

And I started talking about how heroic it was [playing the Masters injured], and people took great umbrage with that comment... You agree. [Koepka]: I couldn't have agreed anymore. Absolutely. I mean, it might have been one of the most heroic things ever done.