PMT DB
PMT DB
Kyle Schwarber on World Series Rehab, Softball Power, and Skyline Chili
The Oakland Raiders are officially headed to the desert, and Big Cat and PFT Commenter are already planning their trips to the first Las Vegas Super Bowl. While the move is a few years away, the guys are mostly worried about owner Mark Davis and his legendary bowl cut. It turns out Davis travels 500 miles to Chico State to get that specific look, and the move to Vegas adds another 150 miles to the pilgrimage.
Beyond the logistics of bad hair, Big Cat is looking at the bigger picture for the industry.
Big CatLegalized gambling will be available across the country in five years.
Football in Vegas, I'm saying, calling your shot five years, say five years, legalized gambling all across the country, it's going to be great.
PFT is looking across the pond for the next move, noting that the NFL has officially used up its domestic relocation threats.
PFT CommenterLondon is the next city to get an NFL franchise.
I guess this puts London as next city up, right? Yeah, because the NFL got rid of its two scary boogeymen out there, Los Angeles and Las Vegas, for wh...
NBA Panic and MVP Debates
LeBron James—or LeBron Blames, depending on who you ask—took an elbow to the shoulder that he treated like a career-ending spinal injury. While the Cavs are in a bit of a tailspin, Big Cat isn't buying the regular-season drama, even if the Celtics are currently sitting in the top spot.
Big CatThe Cavaliers will win the Eastern Conference.
So they're [the Cavs] going to win the East. ... It's every single year this happens. Whatever team LeBron's on, they have a little swoon and everyone's like, uh-oh, hit the panic button. ... And then they'll win the East.
Hank is predictably all-in on his Celtics making a deep run, though PFT thinks a different team in the East is the real threat.
HankThe Celtics can beat the Cavaliers in a seven-game series with home-court advantage.
Do you think the Celtics can beat the Cavs in a seven-game series? Yes. With home advantage? Yes.
PFT CommenterThe Wizards will win the Eastern Conference this year.
Do you think they [the Celtics] can beat the Wizards? No. Yeah. No, this is Wizards' year. It's all about D.C. this year. ... I don't know if you saw this, but the Wizards, they're wearing different jerseys in the playoffs this year. White with stars and stripes on it.
Moving West, the guys weighed in on the Harden vs. Westbrook MVP race. Big Cat views it through the lens of team success, where the Rockets have a ceiling that the Thunder simply can't reach.
Big CatThe Rockets could win the Western Conference, but the Thunder have zero chance.
I think Harden wants to win this, but the Rockets actually are a decent team. Things have to break well, but in a world, there's a theoretical world where they could win the West. The Thunder, no chance. Zero chance.
Kyle Schwarber Joins the Show
Chicago Cubs legend Kyle Schwarber joined the show in Phoenix to discuss his miraculous return from a torn ACL just in time for the 2017 World Series. He detailed the grueling rehab process, which included standing in front of a pitching machine for hours just to track 100-mph fastballs without even swinging.
Schwarber also addressed the common perception that he isn't exactly a burner on the basepaths.
Kyle SchwarberI am much faster than people think I am.
Would you say you're faster than people think? Because I attest to that. I think you're much faster than people think. [Kyle Schwarber]: I would say so, yes. Yes. [Big Cat]: Agreed. Strong agree for the comment I just made.
When he isn't winning rings for the Cubs, Schwarber is a big fan of his home state's most controversial export: Skyline Chili. He didn't take kindly to PFT calling it "diarrhea," defending the cheese coney with his life.
Kyle SchwarberSkyline Chili is greatness in your mouth and I could eat it every day.
Skyline Chili, yes or no? Yes. Big time. ... I disagree with you 100%. ... I could eat it every day. I'm a big Coney guy. ... It's greatness in your mouth. I mean, that cheese and everything. Like, come on, man. You can't tell me that you don't enjoy biting into a cheese coney.
Naturally, the conversation turned to how many "yabos" Schwarber could hit in Big Cat’s 16-inch beer league softball circuit. Schwarber was confident his power would translate to the bigger ball, though he was more interested in the beer-per-inning ratio.
Kyle SchwarberI would hit three home runs per game in a 16-inch beer softball league.
How many home runs do you think you would hit if you played in my 16-inch beer softball league? ...probably like three, so three a game. ...And the fourth would just be like a double?
He also gave a surprisingly nuanced take on the "unwritten rules" of baseball and when it is actually appropriate to pimp a home run.
Kyle SchwarberBat flipping is appropriate in high-pressure situations, but doing it while winning by several runs warrants a beanball.
You've got to know when it's appropriate and know when it's not appropriate. In my mind, that's an appropriate time. You're in a high-pressure situation. You just crush a ball, and you're putting your team up three. It's a big run. I feel like that's appropriate. But, like, if you're up by, like, three and you crush it and you bat flip and you're popping the chains... You deserve to get one right in the ribs.
Hot Seat, Cool Throne, and Locker Room Talk
During Hot Seat/Cool Throne, the guys discussed the upcoming NFL Draft. While Mel Kiper Jr. is back on our screens, Big Cat reminded everyone of the most important fact regarding the draft expert: he eats pumpkin pie for breakfast every single day.
Big CatMel Kiper Jr. eats a slice of pumpkin pie for breakfast every single day.
Every time you see Mel Kiper, though, remember one thing. He eats a slice of pumpkin pie for breakfast every single day. Just put that in your brain.
In a more serious football development, Bill Belichick is apparently already pulling strings in Cleveland before a trade even happens.
PFT CommenterBill Belichick already has conditions on the Browns' number one overall pick for a Jimmy Garoppolo trade.
I think that it's Belichick's pick if he wants it for Garoppolo. Belichick's just such a dick that he institutes his own conditions on other teams' draft picks before he even takes them.
The show wrapped up with a very awkward Locker Room Talk involving Lenny Dykstra’s Reddit AMA and the debut of a new segment, Hashtag Terrorists, where the guys tried to reclaim #DangerTrain from Russell Wilson by tweeting out horrifying facts about public transportation.
If you're riding the rails this week, just remember to watch out for those genital microbes.
