PMT DB
PMT DB
Danny Woodhead on Philip Rivers, Mr. Portnoy's Complaint, and Wild Card Picks
The energy is high as we officially enter playoff eve. Big Cat and PFT are buzzing because the NFL postseason is finally here, and for once, the parity in the league actually feels real. This isn't just the usual hype; the betting lines suggest we are in for one of the most competitive opening rounds in memory.
Big CatThe 2018-19 NFL playoffs are the most wide-open in history
I've been saying it. It is the most wide-open playoffs we've ever had, and I'm excited. Yeah, three of the four games [this weekend] are under a field goal in terms of the point spread.
The Cursed Saturday Afternoon Slot
Before looking forward, Big Cat took a trip down memory lane to celebrate the "shittiest game of the year"—the Saturday afternoon Wild Card game. It’s a game traditionally reserved for backup quarterbacks and teams that have no business being on national television. From the Brock Osweiler vs. Connor Cook disaster to the Ryan Lindley era in Arizona, this slot has a historic level of stink on it.
Big CatThe Saturday afternoon Wild Card game is always the worst game of the NFL season.
We always say this is the shittiest game and it usually is... it's where you get all your jokes off... it's really the Twitter jokes game.
This year, the Texans and Colts get the honor. While the quarterback play is actually good for once, Big Cat is putting his physical well-being on the line for Andrew Luck and company. He's officially betting his pinky finger on a Colts victory, which surely won't come back to haunt him.
Big CatThe Colts will beat the Texans in the Wild Card round
My pinky's on the line, and I'm not saying this just because my pinky's on the line. I think the Colts are going to win this game.
Portnoy's Complaint: The Banking Wars
The people's lawyer, Mr. Portnoy, returned to the show to air out some major grievances against Bank of America and Sprint. After selling the house where Dave grew up, Mr. Portnoy found himself in a nightmare scenario involving a 16-year-old lien and a bank that seemingly refuses to acknowledge the invention of the internet. Hearing a man who still appreciates a good fax machine complain about a bank's archaic technology is a specific kind of irony only this show can provide.
Mr. PortnoyBank of America is a terrible company with archaic technology
I'm dealing with the hated Bank of America... Can you imagine Bank of America cannot email things. They can only fax a guy... They sound like you [Big Cat]. My son told me... anybody that uses a fax is by definition an idiot.
PFT was so moved by the struggle against corporate incompetence that he’s looking to take the fight to Wall Street himself.
PFT CommenterI am shorting the stocks of Bank of America and Sprint due to their terrible customer service.
I'm shorting Bank of America right now, and I'm also going to short Sprint.
Danny Woodhead on the Chargers-Ravens Bowl
Former NFL running back and friend of the program Danny Woodhead joined the show to break down the matchup between two of his former squads. Aside from the X's and O's, Woodhead gave us a peek behind the curtain on the legend of Philip Rivers. Apparently, Rivers is so committed to his "no swearing" policy that he has developed a vocabulary of replacements like "Gracious to Pete" and "Dadgum" that eventually infected the entire locker room. Woodhead also settled the age-old debate about equipment and speed.
Danny WoodheadWearing white cleats makes a football player look significantly faster than wearing black cleats.
White cleats make you look faster... I don't think there's even a conversation... putting black cleats on a white guy... that's like just saying, 'Hey Danny, run your 40-yard dash in quicksand.'
When it comes to the actual game, Woodhead is wary of the Lamar Jackson experience. He noted that while the Ravens' offense is currently gashing teams, the advantage of the unknown won't last forever once defensive coordinators get an entire offseason to digest the tape.
Danny WoodheadNFL teams will figure out Lamar Jackson in his second year
Next year is going to be different. I truly believe that... the coordinators haven't had a year to see what they're doing. You look at a lot of the great running quarterbacks, their first year is pretty nuts, and then the second year, that's when you see if they're really that good.
Sunday Scares and the GOAT Debate
As the guys looked toward the Sunday slate, the focus shifted to the Bears-Eagles matchup. PFT is surprisingly confident in Big Cat’s Bears, dismissing the threat of the defending champs despite the looming shadow of Nick Foles' December magic.
PFT CommenterThe Bears will beat the Eagles easily
I truly mean this. You [Big Cat] don't have anything to worry about. Bears got this. Home playoff game with that defense. You kidding me? You kidding me?
To wrap things up, the guys hit on LeBron James declaring himself the Greatest of All Time on his own show. Big Cat isn't buying the self-promotion, arguing that the true greats never have to state the obvious. PFT took it a step further, finding some uncanny similarities between LeBron's career path and the current political landscape.
PFT CommenterLeBron James is the Donald Trump of basketball
LeBron James actually has the exact same take on LeBron James being the goat that you had... LeBron won while he was in Ohio. Won in Florida, both of them. Check, check. They've both got weird hair. Check. Check. LeBron can't win in California. Neither can Trump. Check.
Keep your pinkies safe and enjoy the football.
