I enjoy watching the Broncos on primetime because the brand of bad football is a fascinating story every time

I actually, I'm gonna say this and I know this, people will be like, 'Oh, you're just saying this to be opposite,' I enjoy having the Broncos on primetime football because every time it's a story. It's bad football but you see something new every time and it's a weird story. It became so hilariously bad that it's interesting. There's something about a Broncos primetime game that it's fascinating to watch because it's just a car crash for 60 minutes plus.

Russell Wilson is a mentally broken man

I think yes, there is [something wrong with Russell Wilson]. I think mentally he's a broken man.

Nathaniel Hackett may be a good offensive coordinator, but he is clearly not prepared to be an NFL head coach

Nathaniel Hackett might be an offensive guru... but you also have to be like, 'Wait, this is something that you're just not prepared for at all.' Just because you're a good offensive coordinator doesn't mean you know how to do all this stuff [like picking up blitzes and making adjustments].

I lied about destroying Vanny Woodhead; I have been keeping it for years

Technically it's destroyed. Legally it's chopped up. But I kind of... I didn't have the heart to chop it up, so I just been keeping it... I was like, every time it was an excuse I used to not follow through with chopping it up.

Zach Wilson's ceiling is literally Patrick Mahomes

Come on, Zach Wilson, his ceiling is literally Patrick Mahomes. That's a fact. If he plays to the best of his ability.

Al-Qaeda is the only one who could have written the Monday Night Football script

Running out with the flag... hard knocks... there was so much hope and hype. And, you know, talking about the NFL script, the only one who could have written that script is Al-Qaeda.