The Rams are a basketball team playing football

The Los Angeles Rams are like a basketball team playing football... They're soft. They're a basketball team playing football. We know all their names and they'll be... like it's fantasy football.

The Rams are officially overrated and no longer a top-three NFC team

I'm officially moving the Rams off of a team that I feel strongly about... I am officially taking the Rams out of my [top three]. Cardinals are better than the Rams right now... I am officially taking them away from my top three teams in the NFC.

Notre Dame will sneak into the playoff over Cincinnati

Notre Dame [is] sneaky and over Cincinnati, which I would be the most wrong thing of all time, but also would be the funniest thing of all time.

Technically Vanny Woodhead does not exist and is legally destroyed

Technically it's destroyed. Legally it's chopped up. But I kind of, I couldn't, I didn't have the heart to chop it up, so I just been keeping it. No, one [owns it]. The, it's technically like scrap. It's a ghost car. It just hasn't been scrapped.

Zach Wilson's ceiling is literally Patrick Mahomes

Come on, Zach Wilson, his ceiling is literally Patrick Mahomes. That's a fact. If he plays to the best of his ability.

Al-Qaeda is the only one who could have written the Monday Night Football script

Running out with the flag... hard knocks... there was so much hope and hype. And, you know, talking about the NFL script, the only one who could have written that script is Al-Qaeda.