Nebraska football is a complete and utter dumpster fire under Scott Frost

Nebraska is a complete and utter dumpster fire. I don't know what you do. They, I don't know if you saw the graphics... but Scott Frost is now nine and 18 in big 10 football games, zero bowl games. He has the second worst record of any head coach in Nebraska history. And it's a complete failure.

Nebraska needs to run the dirtiest, most unethical strength and conditioning program to win games

Seriously, if you're the next Nebraska coach, just buy all the steroids, just get all the steroids. If you get caught, I guarantee you that Cornhusker fans will not give a shit. If you get caught running the dirtiest strength and conditioning program in the history of college sports... it would be less embarrassing if you're Nebraska to get caught cheating than it is running whatever you have been running for the last 10 years.

Brett Bielema will be a good coach at Illinois

I credit to Brett Bielema because I actually think he's going to be a good coach at Illinois. And he plays Bret Bielema ball... that drive to start the second half where he was like, I'm just gonna run the ball down your throat for 75 yards was vintage Bielema.

Technically Vanny Woodhead does not exist and is legally destroyed

Technically it's destroyed. Legally it's chopped up. But I kind of, I couldn't, I didn't have the heart to chop it up, so I just been keeping it. No, one [owns it]. The, it's technically like scrap. It's a ghost car. It just hasn't been scrapped.

Zach Wilson's ceiling is literally Patrick Mahomes

Come on, Zach Wilson, his ceiling is literally Patrick Mahomes. That's a fact. If he plays to the best of his ability.

Al-Qaeda is the only one who could have written the Monday Night Football script

Running out with the flag... hard knocks... there was so much hope and hype. And, you know, talking about the NFL script, the only one who could have written that script is Al-Qaeda.