The window for Tiger King Halloween costumes has officially closed

I think the idea that Tiger King Halloween costumes were going to be all the rage, that ship has sailed. Tiger King feels like it was 10 years ago.

Resting your hands on your knees while tired is a sign of weakness that I will exploit

I still believe if you have your hands on your knees, it's a sign of weakness and I will exploit you. [Resting your hands on your head] was such a mind fuck when that came out, when they said that it doesn't make a difference if you're tired.

I call bullshit on 'Business Insider' viral science videos

I'll clarify it as Business Insider video science. Whenever that science comes out, I call bullshit. The science that basically says, you know, every like six months they'll say studies show that people who drink six cups of coffee a day live to 100 plus... and then six months go past and they're like, studies show people who eat too much red meat die at 40.

Never name a dog after a sports figure who hasn't already secured a Hall of Fame legacy

Never name your dogs after sports figures that aren't Hall of Famers... maybe don't name him after a player unless he's been at least two or three All-Star games. That's a good little rule of thumb.

The Squatty Potty is the medically superior way to defecate because of human evolution

I got it, bro. I got it. Okay. This is not a plug, but a Squatty potty... We sit regular, right? And that messes up our bowel movements. Right? So if he's leaning for a while... it could be coming out the wrong angle, but the Squatty potty lifts your knees to your chest. And the angles is downward. That's how we evolved to actually defecate.

Michael Jordan was suspended for gambling in 1993 and the league kept it under wraps

The reason why he retired originally in 93 was because he got suspended for gambling... I heard how this conspiracy goes is that they actually suspended him, but they just kept it under wraps because it would have been bad for the league.