An alien invasion would be a blessing in disguise because it would unify Earth against a common enemy

I actually think that this could be a blessing in disguise for Earth. Because it's like Earth has been in training camp with each other for the last, like, 2,000 years... And now all of a sudden we've got an enemy to play against. It's fun hitting somebody else, right?

Aliens will eventually hack the cloud and release everyone's deleted messages and photos

I've always thought that at some point in the future that every text message, Snapchat, picture message, picture they've ever taken and deleted, that's all going to end up on the internet for everyone... Aliens are about to start that. They're aliens, so they obviously know how to get to the cloud.

The US military is faking alien news to distract Donald Trump and steal NASA's funding

The military saw how good NASA was at holding [Trump's] attention... they're like, this president fucking loves aliens and loves space. And they're getting... NASA's shine is getting too bright right now. We want a slice of that pie. And so now they're trying to distract him... they're like, fuck it. We're going to make up some aliens and we're going to pretend that there's a war because there's nothing more than Donald Trump wants.

The Brewers are winning the World Series

Just get used to it. The Brewers are gonna win the World Series.

Rams special teams will keep costing them big games

The special teams is just atrocious and every single year they do this and every single year it costs them in a high-leverage game. And it's just the same thing over and over.

The Titans have suffered more than any NFL fan base

The Titans have the worst record in the NFL at 19 and 54 since trading A.J. Brown. That's a lot of losses. Not a lot of wins.