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Loss
Aug 14, 2019·Hot Seat/Cool Throne
#17432
HankHank

Michael Porter Jr.'s spine is made of dust

My hot seat is Michael Porter Jr. You guys remember him? Remember he's in the NBA? Has yet to play a minute. His spine is made of dust.

While Porter has had multiple back surgeries, he has played 5+ seasons and won a championship, proving his spine is not literally dust.

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Void
Aug 14, 2019
#17429
Big CatBig Cat

Green Bay is kind of a dump

We went up to Green Bay. Kind of a dump. We talked to Matt LaFleur about coaching Aaron Rodgers. They call it title town for a reason, folks.

Whether a city is a 'dump' is purely a matter of personal opinion.
Loss
Aug 14, 2019
#28387
PFT CommenterPFT Commenter

I will give Antonio Brown two certified helmets if he simulates eating Derek Carr's ass as a touchdown celebration

We have tracked down two of these [Schutt Air Advantage] helmets in his size... he said that if we can find one and he can get one, he'll trade a Raiders used helmet. And we don't want that. In return, we want you to do a touchdown dance for us... Either eat Derek Carr's ass or P.F. Chang's with Mark Davis... You gotta simulate ass eating. You get both helmets.

This was a comedic offer that Antonio Brown did not accept, and the celebration never occurred.
Void
Aug 14, 2019
#17430
Big CatBig Cat

Dak Prescott is not worth $40 million per year

I don't think he's worth 40 million dollars. And I think that you probably have to sit down, Dak, and be like, dude, I know that you want this much money, but would you rather this much money or maybe win a Super Bowl with the Dallas Cowboys?

Dak eventually signed a 4-year, $160M contract ($40M/year) in 2021. While the cap rose, he has not yet led them to a Super Bowl, though he has played at a high level.

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Open
Oct 26, 2026
#31743
HankHank

The Browns cannot make a serious playoff run

Could they make a run to the Super Bowl? No. Yes or no. Yeah. Think of the Browns. The Browns aren't good. We know the Browns aren't good.

The Browns' eventual playoff performance will determine whether they make a serious postseason run.
Win
Oct 23, 2026·Week 7 Picks
#31721
HankHank

The Giants are a strong play with the points

I love the Giants nine. JJ McCarthy was phenomenal last week. You look great. The Texans are not great.

Hank predicted the Giants would be a strong play with +9 points against the Texans. The New York Giants defeated the Houston Texans 27-21 in overtime on October 25, 2026, winning the game outright and easily covering the spread.
Open
Oct 21, 2026
#31711
HankHank

I bet a lot of money on the Patriots to win the Super Bowl

I bet a lot of money on the Patriots to win the Super Bowl.

The Patriots' 2026 season and Super Bowl outcome are not yet resolved.