I'm officially retiring from writing books for at least the next 25 years

We promise we won't write another book till at least 20 years. And probably, I'm actually gonna say 25 years. I think I'm gonna retire from writing books.

Shohei Ohtani's home runs in Colorado don't count because they are just pop flies anywhere else

I know Shohei [Ohtani] hit two home runs, but he was doing it in Colorado and we could fucking do that. That's a pop fly. That's a fucking pop fly. I could hit a home run in Colorado.

The Nationals' offense is having a great year because facing their own Little League pitching staff in spring training gave them confidence.

That's why the Nats offense is so good this year because their pitching staff is pretty much like a little league team. So like in spring training, they just all got really confident. They're like, yeah, we can all hit.

The only reason celebrities agreed to write chapters for the PMT book is out of fear they would be turned on by the hosts

The answer to your question is why would any of these people agree to do any of this? 'Cause we don't want you two pricks to turn on us... We're trying to... I'm keeping you close so I can do a little bit of work to keep you guys on my side.

Super Bowl 2027 in LA will be Detroit vs. Buffalo

Who's your prediction for Super Bowl 2027 in la? Oh, you have the script, right? Yeah, I have the script. It'll be Detroit Against Buffalo.

Patrick Mahomes is a genuinely good guy who does a lot of charity work when cameras aren't there

I'm amazed at Patrick Mahomes. He's a legitimate good guy that I think has a really big heart. When you talk to their PR folks, they're like, you should see what this guy does when nobody's looking. When cameras aren't there... he does stuff that nobody has any idea about. Just 'cause he is a good guy.