I'm officially retiring from writing books for at least the next 25 years

We promise we won't write another book till at least 20 years. And probably, I'm actually gonna say 25 years. I think I'm gonna retire from writing books.

Shohei Ohtani's home runs in Colorado don't count because they are just pop flies anywhere else

I know Shohei [Ohtani] hit two home runs, but he was doing it in Colorado and we could fucking do that. That's a pop fly. That's a fucking pop fly. I could hit a home run in Colorado.

The Nationals' offense is having a great year because facing their own Little League pitching staff in spring training gave them confidence.

That's why the Nats offense is so good this year because their pitching staff is pretty much like a little league team. So like in spring training, they just all got really confident. They're like, yeah, we can all hit.

Ferdinand Magellan and Al Michaels are the only two 'map guys' in human history.

Al Michaels. That's that... he's brilliant at knowing he's a map guy. And, maybe that's good for the brain. I hope that I'm half as good as Al Michaels when I'm at that stage of my career... but I've never heard of a map guy other than maybe Magellan and Al Michaels. I was like, sit around studying maps? I just, no, that's why Netflix was created.

Super Bowl 2027 in LA will be Detroit vs. Buffalo

Who's your prediction for Super Bowl 2027 in la? Oh, you have the script, right? Yeah, I have the script. It'll be Detroit Against Buffalo.

Patrick Mahomes is a genuinely good guy who does a lot of charity work when cameras aren't there

I'm amazed at Patrick Mahomes. He's a legitimate good guy that I think has a really big heart. When you talk to their PR folks, they're like, you should see what this guy does when nobody's looking. When cameras aren't there... he does stuff that nobody has any idea about. Just 'cause he is a good guy.