Takes

Stevie Wonder isn't actually blind

Stevie Wonder isn't blind. Have you seen some of the clips out there? He catches microphones that are falling down. Like he's pointing at people. He's a blind guy that points. They do not point. Stevie Wonder is not blind. Look it up.

Arnold Schwarzenegger is the greatest American to ever live

Name the greatest American to ever live. ... The answer we were looking for was Arnold Schwarzenegger, Terminator. ... I'm pretty sure he was [born in America].

Steve Jobs is still alive and living in South America with Lionel Messi's father

Steve Jobs was sitting in – he's not dead... Everyone knows Steve Jobs living in South America, if you remember that picture... With Messi's dad.

LeBron James is sleeping with Beyonce to impress her

Do you think that LeBron James is sleeping with Beyonce? I think it's a good possibility... LeBron James played tonight like he was showing off for a certain somebody sitting courtside, if you know what I'm saying.

Olympians should be banned from masturbating for months before the games to store up testosterone for their country

if I was his coach, I would consider cutting him because... right now, if you're an Olympian, you should not be masturbating. Now is the time where you need to be storing up these reserves of testosterone for the next like five months. You're competing for your country here, OK? The American flag is not a jizz rag.

Jeff George should tweet something racist just to feel like a celebrity again

Jeff George should just tweet something racist tomorrow just to get the rush of being like a celebrity again... That has to be a desire you have to fight every day.

Hulk Hogan's sex tape was likely a publicity stunt

I find it hard to believe that this wasn't some kind of a stunt where [Hulk Hogan] gave his permission to do this. I don't think the stunt was meant for him to originally bring a lawsuit. I think the stunt was probably so he would get clicks and hits and publicity.