Takes

The Buffalo Bills will beat the Chiefs in the playoffs and go to the Super Bowl

I think that the Buffalo bills could very well beat the Chiefs. In fact, it definitely can. I think that the Buffalo bills will beat the chiefs in the playoffs. Wow. I'm going to be the first. I'm going to be the first that I heard. Say it to say it. Okay. The Buffalo bills are going to the super bowl.

A US handball team with me, LeBron, and Patrick Mahomes would win Olympic gold

I guarantee we can put a team together. We can win gold. Just, just from pure like arm speed. I don't think guys in other countries and just a really big guy as the goalie back. Right. If you watch it, I mean, I've studied this from time to time... I think if it was you, Patrick Mahomes, and LeBron just how many players play and handle like eight on a shirt all the time. So it was you three against eight players from any other country. I think we went, I think we, I guarantee we can put a team together. We can win gold.

Amazon will eventually buy the entire NFL

Amazon is going to buy the entire NFL eventually. You think it was a one-off [the Amazon game]? It is not. Amazon is going to buy the entire NFL.

Ryan Fitzpatrick should be in the Hall of Fame as a contributor to the game

I actually think that Ryan Fitzpatrick should be in the Hall of Fame. I think he should be a Hall of Famer. Not just memorable, not just because the bust would be legendary with the beard in it, but because like he's provided so many great memories... if he's not a player, he should be contributor to the game and get into the NFL. Absolutely.

The 2020 Steelers are the worst 11-3 team in sports history

I tweeted out that they are—are they the worst 11 and 3 team in any sport in history? And I think they still might be. I don't see the Steelers being able to win in the playoffs.

2021 will be the year of hard bodies

Hard bodies in 2021. What does that mean? We're just going to get hard. Hell yeah. By the end of 2021, you will be able to bounce a quarter off my abs and ass. We're the next generation of being hard.

The Pittsburgh Steelers are straight up frauds

The Pittsburgh Steelers are frauds straight up frauds. 11 and 0 to 11 and 3 losing as 14 point favorites to the Bengals. They are broken, they are hurt. They are damaged. And I don't know, like, has there ever been a team that's gone 11-0 and finished 11 and 5 and still going to the playoffs?

Giannis Antetokounmpo cannot be your best player in the final two minutes of a playoff game

Giannis might be when it comes down to the last two, three minutes of the game, he can't be your best player because of the style of game that he has... not a great free throw shooter, not a great jump shooter, everybody packs the paint... if you put James Harden on that team and late game where you need a bucket, you need free throws... he would be a perfect fit.

The Buccaneers are frauds who rely too heavily on 'flipping the switch'

My question from this game: are the Bucs frauds? I think the Bucs are relying on flipping the switch. And I feel like if you are... the Chiefs can be a flip the switch team. Tom Brady and the Patriots can be a flip the switch team. The Bucs have not done it. So you can't be like, 'Hey, we're going to flip this switch.' I feel like the switch isn't there.

Ryan Tannehill is a top five quarterback in the NFL

Ryan Tannehill deserves the credit for being an awesome quarterback the last year and a half. One of the top five quarterbacks in the league. Whether you think he's ranked there or not, he's ranked there statistically.

The Jets should not draft a quarterback and instead build around Sam Darnold and Penei Sewell

Is it crazy to say that the Jets might not want to take a quarterback with the second pick? Who's gonna be there in the two-hole is the kid from Oregon, Penei Sewell, who's going to be an awesome offensive lineman. The Jets just go back-to-back, they get Sewell from Oregon. See if Sam Darnold could maybe get them for cheap. You protect him now, which is their biggest issue.

Billy Football will fight Jose Canseco as my champion

I have found a champion in my place. Learn the game of Thrones, Jose. Ever heard of it? My champion is Billy Football. I will have him fight in lieu of me... Billy is fighting for my honor. He's your fall guy, right? I am a coward, hand up, whatever. But I have my champion. He is Billy Football. He will fight in my place.

Anthony Lynn is the dumbest coach in football history

Anthony Lynn is the dumbest coach that has ever been created in coaching history. And he fumbled again. He had a bird brain. He has a goddamn bird inside of the skull. Now the bird's dead because even the bird can't stand hanging out with him.

Hugh Freeze would jump at the Tennessee head coaching job

I think he'd like to be the next coach at the University of Tennessee. I think that's the job he's wanted for quite some time, probably since before he became a college coach... if that opportunity came available, he would jump at it.

Alabama will beat Florida by 40 points in the SEC Championship

I actually think they'll win by 40. A lot better game out of Florida than we saw last week. I just don't know that they are talented enough to beat Alabama.

No quarterback has ever won a Super Bowl wearing a visor

It adds up though. We don't think that any quarterback has ever won a super bowl wearing a visor. It's true. [Trace McSorley]: I guess we got to change that. [PFT]: No, I mean, I think we've got a, when it, with the visor, that's what I'm saying. We need someone to do it.

An Xbox is the best breakup gift to give during the holidays

What's the best gift to get someone that you want to break up with after the holiday season? An Xbox, I'm just going to say it. Like something that will keep them entertained. Because if you break up with him after giving him an Xbox, he's not going to be talking to you anyways. At that point it will just be obsessed with his new video game system.

The Steelers are a fraudulent 11-2 team

The Pittsburgh Steelers are the worst 11 and 2 team of all time... Frauds was the word I was going to use. That's a team that you do not feel good about when it comes to December football going into January.

Leonard Fournette at fourth overall was a worse pick than Mitch Trubisky

I think Leonard Fournette being drafted fourth in 2017 was a worse pick than Mitch Trubisky... taking a running back with the fourth overall pick is crazy... you cut him, and then the guy who comes in, who's like a no-name [James Robinson], does really well.

Kyrie Irving is the 'basketball Steve Jobs'

I think I've decided to just become a Kyrie guy... what's the harm in going with everything that Kyrie Irving says and believes? I'd rather believe him and have him be wrong than not believe him and have him be right... He thinks he's the basketball Steve Jobs.

Cam Newton might retire after this season

I don't know, I think Cam Newton might retire after this year.

The Big Ten must change its rules to ensure Ohio State makes the conference championship and the playoff

The Big Ten, at least some fans of the Big Ten, are so antiquated with reality... Ohio State is playing a different sport and on a different level... You could say, hey, Ohio State going to the college football playoff is good for the perception of the Big Ten. It's $6 million to the conference that gets dispersed evenly. Maybe we should focus on getting our team better instead of trying to drag Ohio State back down.

Coach K will pull Duke from the season if they continue to lose bad games

I would not be surprised at all if after, like, a month and a few more bad losses, Coach K pulled his team from the season... once he gets a little losing streak going, he is definitely liable to be like, listen, we're not going to go through the motions. The most important thing is keeping these kids healthy.

When I walk on the field I feel like Michael Jordan or Derek Jeter stepping up to the plate

It's like Michael Jordan or a certain Derek Jeter comes up to the plate. The guy on second base, you feel like he's always going to knock him in. I feel like that every time I walk up to the plate. I feel like that every time I walk up to the field.

You just humble-answered me — that's exactly what we asked you not to do

All right, but you're fucking awesome. You just humble answered me. You just did the same thing.

Jake Paul is lying about being 6'1" and is actually 5'9"

Jake Paul is lying about his height. He's listed at 6'1", but is really 5'9". And I put a picture of Jake Paul who wore a headdress in his face-off with Nate Robinson to show that he's not actually the same height... He's shorter than KSI, who is listed as 5'9".

Cooper Kupp is the most important player on the Rams

Here's a hot take. Team has Aaron Donald, Jalen Ramsey on it. Most important player, Cooper Kupp. I mean, they do look totally different when he's out there. Last year, their offense kind of went to shit... I said it.

The Steelers are the worst 11-0 team of all time

Yeah, I think it's fair to say the Steelers are the worst 11-0 team of all time.

The Washington Football Team will win the NFC East and beat the Cardinals in the playoffs

I officially care, and I think that they're going to beat the Steelers on Monday... I think that the football team is going to win the division at 6-10, maybe even 7-9. I think that we're going to win a home playoff game against the Arizona Cardinals.

A smart NFL team should hire Cam Newton as a specialist for two-point conversions only

What a smart team should do is they should just hire Cam Newton to be their all-time two-point conversion quarterback. Go for two guy. Go for two every single time, snap the ball directly to him, and he either runs... or he does a jump pass. Cam Newton is probably the best short yardage football player of all time.

RG3 will definitely get injured during his start for the Ravens against the Steelers

RG3, we talked about this before the show. RG3 is absolutely going to get injured. I hope that he doesn't. But, I mean, I've never been so confident.

World Chase Tag is a superior concept to Parkour and should be an Olympic sport

I want a sport where if you tag a guy, there you go. Where there's a winner and there's a loser... It's basically parkour, but with an element of tag. That's an Olympic sport... This sport, this tag sport, is ten times the sport of handball.

Bill Belichick is doing his best coaching job ever in 2020

Remember I told you this take a few weeks ago? I do think it's coming. Is this Bill Belichick's best coaching job? It might be. This actually is Bill Belichick's best coaching job.

Michigan basketball is energized by the failures of the football program

Michigan's football season [will be more disappointing]. Michigan football sucking powers the basketball program. I really think there's something to that. The worse the football program does, the more people shit on Harbaugh by saying Michigan is a basketball school now, which is good because you're saying that to shit on Harbaugh, but what's happening is a real-life narrative is building that Michigan really is a really good basketball school.

Rick Pitino will eventually become the head coach at Boston College

I'm calling my shot, is going to be Boston College. Because Boston College is about to fire their coach... It's a Catholic school. Iona's a Catholic school. Rick Pitino's a Catholic man. It all lines up. Old Big East ties. Boston College has like some, you know, they had the 1979 point shaving scandal. They have a little checkered past themselves.

The Raiders are the team the Chiefs don't want to face in the playoffs and could make a run like the 2019 Titans.

The Raiders are, I would say, the team that the Chiefs don't want to face in the playoffs... they feel like a team that has enough going for them that they could make some – I'm putting them in my make some noise. I'm putting it in them like you want to talk about the Titans last year going to the AFC Championship game. I could see the Raiders making a similar run this year.

Carson Wentz is not the guy for the Eagles and they should move on.

This is not the guy... You can't just try to justify because you made a mistake and paid him a ton of money, which you're going to probably get out of that contract as soon as you can. But you've got to be able to establish that team... You've got to get away from that kid.

Northwestern fans need to stop pretending to be a scrappy underdog and act like a good football program.

I just cannot stand Northwestern fans... You can't do the, we're the little engine that could. We're the scrappy underdog. No one cares about Northwestern... Stop pretending like every win is like, oh, my God, we fucking... shock the world and we beat you. You won the Big Ten West two years ago.

Jadeveon Clowney is no longer a good football player

Like Jadeveon Clowney in college, I was like, that guy's not going to be good at the next level because he wears number two. I was right. He's not good anymore.

Matt Patricia is the 'dumbest rocket scientist' in the world

I think that Matt Patricia is, without a doubt, the dumbest rocket science on the face of the earth right now.

A parlay strategy involving five underdogs has a 50% likelihood of profit

I plugged in 32 outcomes, and then once each outcome happens, you see how much money you stand on winning in that moment... this actually has a 50% likelihood of being positive.

Theo Epstein will be the next MLB Commissioner

I actually think he'll be the next commissioner. He should be the next commissioner. I think Manfred's got to be nervous because Theo Epstein's a fucking genius, and everything he does turns into being great.

James Harden's production is inflated by about 25% due to the Rockets' system

I also think Houston's style is almost like the best Instagram filter... where when you go play in Houston's system when it's Harden... you're 25% better... it's very clear, at least to me, and I don't know why more people don't say this, that you almost have to shave off like 25% of it [Harden's production].

The Ravens are frauds

Week 10 in the books. The Ravens are frauds. Confirmed.

The Giants are a good football team and will win the NFC East

The Giants are going to win the NFC East. Yeah, they are. The Giants are actually, dare I say it, a good football team. I'm graduating them. Yeah, I am. I'm saying they're a good football team.

Andrew Luck will eventually go to Denver to win a Super Bowl

You know who [Elway] could call? Andrew Luck. Yep. That's true. Stanford connection. Andrew Luck to Denver. Follows in the footsteps of Peyton, former Colt, going to Denver to win a Super Bowl.

Russell Wilson is only playing poorly because he's secretely hurt

Is Russell Wilson hurt? He's got to be hurt, Big Cat. He's got to be hurt. He was in the middle of an MVP season. He's got to be hurt. If you don't know, Russell Wilson is one of the – there's certain athletes that are so beloved that the only way they can ever be bad is if they're hurt... they're like, well, he must be hurt.

Drew Brees' injury is actually to his shoulder, not his ribs

Drew Brees hurt his ribs. Quote, unquote, ribs. You're skeptical about that... Drew Brees has a bad shoulder. Okay. He got slammed on his shoulder. Okay. His shoulder's hurt. He probably still has broken ribs... Watch the replay and tell me his shoulders hurt. I watched the replay many times. I want you to watch it again and tell me his shoulders hurt.

The Tennessee Titans are frauds

We have to talk about the Tennessee Titans being frauds and having the worst special teams of all time. Fraudulent football team.

Derrick Henry is not a good short-yardage back

I want to give credit a lot of credit to our own Billy football for initiating the take that Derrick Henry is not a good short yardage back... he doesn't like getting the ball up the middle... he's built like a horse, not an ox... he's all gam and no hams.