Wraps are just shittier, guiltier versions of sandwiches
The wrap is just a shittier sandwich. It's not like you didn't do anything great. It's more portable and it's like slightly healthier, but it's not as healthy as people want you to believe it is. You can't tell me that a wrap is better than a sandwich with good bread.
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View episodeI am the best person in the Barstool office at table tennis
The moment Hank had an opportunity to say I was no longer the best, he would have ran away with it. So I knew if I lost back-to-back... But I knew I'm [the best freaking one here].
Medina Spirit is a junkie horse
I put the blame on the horse. You can't just make excuses. The horse likes doing drugs, obviously. As our 45th president called it, it's a junkie horse.
My Kentucky Derby win has a huge asterisk because of Bob Baffert
I finally did win the Kentucky Derby, and I talked about it ad nauseum for the days afterwards, and then that one win has a huge asterisk because Bob Baffert is addicted to shooting his horses up with steroids.
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View profileThe Cavaliers-Knicks series is over after Game 1
Series over, you can't lose that game if you're the Cavs. When it went into overtime, we said the Cavs have to win this. This is must win. You can't give this up. All time choke.
The Knicks are going to the NBA Finals
Memes, Zac, congratulations. Game one. I'm gonna say it. You guys are in the NBA finals. Congrats. I'm not even trolling.
Victor Wembanyama is the best watch in the NBA right now
[Wembanyama] is the best watch in the NBA right now. It's not even close... just his entire performance leaving it like, he was so gassed that three that looked like we were talking about it, it looked like it was almost like there was a whistle beforehand because it was like in slow motion. It was just incredible.