We are actively trying to never be nominated for a Sports Emmy unless it is for the John Cena interview

We are actively trying to never be nominated for everything... if they wanna nominate us and only do it on our John Cena interview, we're in.

Collecting signatures is objectively weird and has been replaced by the selfie

I don't think that as a society, we talk enough about the fact that collecting signatures is just fucking weird. Yeah. It is. Especially if you have a picture and you're like, 'Hey, can you write your name on the, on this picture that I have of you?'... I do think that the selfies have taken the place of it, which is a hundred percent, way more meaningful.

LeBron James is actually 0-10 in NBA Finals appearances if you apply the proper asterisks

LA Fraud is actually 0 and 10 in the finals in my eyes. 2007, lost swept. 2011 lost. 2012, baby thunder doesn't count. 2013, Ray Allen also rigged. 2013, Ray Allen doesn't count. 2014 lost. 2015 lost. 2016, injured warriors doesn't count. 2017 lost. 2018, lost swept. 2020 Mickey Mouse doesn't count.

I lied about destroying Vanny Woodhead; I have been keeping it for years

Technically it's destroyed. Legally it's chopped up. But I kind of... I didn't have the heart to chop it up, so I just been keeping it... I was like, every time it was an excuse I used to not follow through with chopping it up.

Zach Wilson's ceiling is literally Patrick Mahomes

Come on, Zach Wilson, his ceiling is literally Patrick Mahomes. That's a fact. If he plays to the best of his ability.

Al-Qaeda is the only one who could have written the Monday Night Football script

Running out with the flag... hard knocks... there was so much hope and hype. And, you know, talking about the NFL script, the only one who could have written that script is Al-Qaeda.