Takes

The Detroit Lions are going to be just fine after their win over the Ravens

The Detroit Lions are gonna be just fine because they went into Baltimore on Monday night and they look just as good as ever.

Derrick Henry has a serious fumbling problem in the 2025 season

He also just has a fumbling problem right now. He's fumbled three times on 43 touches in 2025.

The Colts are a legit wagon and Daniel Jones is a good quarterback

Colts 41, Titans 20. So bad news for Colts fans. They finally punted. Good news for Colts fans. They are a fucking wagon... Daniel Jones continues to be awesome... Daniel Jones is just good. No, he's just fucking good. He's just good in the Super Bowl era.

Quentin Johnston is officially a WR1 under Jim Harbaugh

Ever since Harbaugh took over, it's just completely different... as bad he is been in the past, you can't like deny that he is just, he's gradually gotten better and better and I mean, hopefully even better... hopefully even better. Yeah... Quinton Johnston might be a wide receiver one.

I don't think Carson Wentz is fixable as a quarterback due to his extensive scar tissue

I'm not ready to say that about Cars. I don't, I don't think that Carson Wentz is fixable. Yeah. I think he's got too, too much scar tissue.

Jalen Hurts is a winner who doesn't care about anything but the final result

Jalen Hurts in games that he has started and finished. He's 18 and oh in his last 18 games that he started and finished... The, the Eagles. And he doesn't give a fuck about how they just keep winning.

The Bears-Cowboys matchup is a 'Gateway Game' that will define the rest of Chicago's season

This is a gateway game. If the Bears win this game... don't be shocked if the Bears are five and four or six and three... but if they don't win this game, none of this matters. They're own three and they just suck.

The Indianapolis Colts are a legitimately good team without a clear-cut weakness right now

The Colts have really jumped off the screen. Like even if they had lost a game, I'd still be like, that's a good football team. Yep. That's a legit good football team.

Ryan Polls' rebuild of the Chicago Bears is a complete joke

The main culprit is Ryan Polls because we are now in year four of a rebuild... it's absolutely abysmal. Year four of a rebuilding they're somehow worse. Ryan Polls has not had a single Pro Bowler drafted. That's pretty crazy.

A Bengal tiger would kill a Jaguar in a fight every single time

I just looked at AI and a Bengal would kill a Jaguar like a hundred out of a hundred times. A Jaguar does have one of like the the fiercest bites in the animal kingdom. The problem is the Bengal outweighs the Jaguar by like 200 pounds.

Evanston at 11:00 AM is the toughest place to play in the country

I have a longstanding theory that Evanston at 11:00 AM is the toughest place to play in the country. And then Fox has a stats person who looked it up to try to give me some juice for it. It was just like, this is probably why.

An NFL trade request doesn't really mean anything anymore; it's just the new version of a holdout

What this should teach us more than anything about the NFL is that a trade request doesn't really mean shit anymore. In the NBA I feel like if you request a trade... it's over. In the NFL, that's just the new holdout, right? Is requesting a trade.

Rajon Rondo is currently the number one ranked flag football quarterback in the nation

He is the number one ranked flag football quarterback in the country right now... there's all the basketball aggregators being like Rajon Rondo is currently the number one ranked flag football quarterback in the nation right now.

Aroldis Chapman is officially unhittable again

I didn't know Aroldis Chapman was just like Unhittable again. ... He's like truly unhittable again. ... 0.33 ERA over his last 30 appearances. That's insane.

The Minnesota Vikings franchise is the 'Hall of Very Good' of NFL teams

Minnesota Vikings franchise hall of very good 65 seasons. 32 playoff appearances in 65 seasons. They've literally been in the playoffs almost exactly half the time. ... They've never won a Super Bowl. They're the hall of very good franchises.

A quarterback with long hair will never win a Super Bowl

If you have long hair, you can't win a Super Bowl as a quarterback. Never been done.

I am 'pre-sad' for Bills fans because they won't win the Super Bowl despite their hope

I'm pre-sad because it, it is just, it's kind of, it's great to watch Bills fans. I love Bills fans... But the belief and the hope that they have, like, this is our year. We're finally gonna get done... I'm pretty sad for them. Yeah. And I hope that I'm wrong. I I hope that I'm wrong, but I am pre-sad.

I got faster as a runner between the ages of 20 and 27

I got faster somehow. I'm not gonna lie, but is it really did I get super, did I get that much fast from 20 to 27? I wouldn't say now I just, I just got more efficient with my movements and there's no secret to it... when I'm here training, every Thursday I'm hitting high speeds.

Hurdling defenders is still in my future as a runner

Only person who I can say was really mad about the hurdle or any hurdles I've ever done is my mama. My mama don't like when I leave my feet. But I think hurtling is in my future again.

The AJ Brown deal is one of the worst trades ever.

Treyon Burks got waived, which officially makes the AJ Brown deal one of the worst trades ever. Titans traded AJ Brown to the Eagles. Eagles won a Super Bowl with AJ Brown. He also signed a four year extension. And then the Eagles traded to the Titans the 2022 number 18 overall pick, which was Treyon Burks. I don't think any of them are on the team anymore.

Sundays are easier than training camp because I don't have to face Lamar Jackson.

Sundays are way easier. Like, and sometimes when this dude, some of the stuff he be doing at practice, I be like, bro, I'm glad I'm not going up against that because nobody else in the league can do what he do... Lamar makes it easier going up against even other dual threat quarterbacks.

The Eagles will be really good because they have the best GM in the NFL

Well, they're gonna be really good... Howie Roseman's probably the best GM in the NFL now. They gonna be good.

Excluding Joe Rogan from a list of the 100 most influential podcasts is crazy

Joe Rogan not on the List, kind of crazy. Like Joe Rogan is the biggest podcast in the world. And he's like, he's in the news all the time and think about how many careers he started. It's fucking nuts.

There is a better chance of Terry McLaurin playing for the Patriots than Ben Simmons playing for the Celtics

I trust Brad Stevens. I don't think this is gonna happen. I think there's a better chance Terry McLaurin plays for the Patriots than Ben Simmons plays with the Celtics.

I ate a peanut butter and jelly sandwich before pretty much every game of my career

I would eat a peanut butter and jelly sandwich before the game. I started that in the minor leagues... and I stuck with that even in the big leagues... pretty much every game [for 1,937 games].

The Indiana Pacers were a physical and sneaky aggressive defensive team in the 2025 playoffs

I knew what it was going to be like Indiana, we knew how fast they were going to play and they were sneaky, aggressive defensively through the playoffs and nobody was really talking about it. But they were really physical.

The Home Run Derby's current timing format is too exhausting for players

I don't think people appreciate how exhausting it is for the players to take that many swings that fast. So it's something we will talk about with ESPN regarding changing the format.

The Barstool Sports partnership with Fox Sports will not change the content of Pardon My Take

I'll say right now, [the Fox deal] is not gonna change this show at all. We made sure of that. We, we it's gonna be a great, like, this is very different than the ESPN partnership back in 2017. Fox is a very willing partner. They're very excited. We're very excited. They believe in us. We believe in them a lot different than what we went through with ESPN.

The new FS1 show featuring Barstool Chicago will not cannibalize Pardon My Take

It's gonna be a mix of everybody in this office and people that might not be in this office right now that might stop in. I don't expect to be spending a full-time jobs worth of time going on the show, but I'll go to try to make it on like once a week is what we discussed. That way it's not gonna cannibalize Pardon My Take.

Opening Counter-Strike skin cases is officially back

My who's back of the week is going to be Counterstrike cases specifically opening them... They went CS:GO case unboxings, $590,000 in cases they unboxed. Unprecedented territory is what we're approaching there.

I turned down hosting The Price Is Right despite a $10 million offer

I get a call out the blue and said, 'Hey, we're interested in having you host Price is Right.' And they said, Bob Barker signed off on you... I just didn't think I could do it well enough. It was $10 million a year [in 1999].

I am not an intercourse guy

Not much of an, not much of an intercourse guy.

Trey Turner not receiving an MLB All-Star reserve spot is a snub

Trey Turner leads league in hits and he didn't even get a reserve spot... say what? Christopher Sanchez should have been in over MacKenzie Gore. That makes no sense.

Ben Simmons hitting threes in a wide-open gym is the official sign of summer

We have the first sign of summer and it's Ben Simmons in a wide open gym hitting threes. He looked good. He looked so good... That's, that literally means summer's here.

The Celtics are rebuilt but no longer the same core

The real NBA news though, is Hank your Celtics, the championship team that you were on a duck boat with... is no more. Kristaps [Porzingis] gone. Jrue Holiday gone. Are they done?

Morgan Wallen is fully back after his recent controversies

Morgan Wallen... he had some controversies, you know, throwing a chair over their ledge... I just feel like he was a fantastic star. I think he's so back.

Connor McDavid is currently incapable of winning the big one

I feel bad for [Connor McDavid]. He's an incredible player, but as of right now, I'm just going on the facts that I see — has not won the big one. And I'm not trying to do insult stats, but he's the only captain who's lost in back-to-back cup finals in the last 50 years.

The Pacers lost Game 5 because Rick Carlisle didn't play TJ McConnell enough down the stretch

I feel like that Rick Carlisle, I don't know, maybe this is just one of those situations where he obviously knows his players better than anyone else. But TJ McConnell was a problem. I think he could not, the thunder did not know what to do with him. And he should have kept with him... they took him out for the last, like six or whatever, the crucial six minutes when they lost the game.

The Oilers will start Stuart Skinner in Game 5 despite his benching

He's gonna start game five. I think they'll go back to him. I mean, he got 'em there. Obviously the last two, whatever four periods have not looked good, losing six-one and then tonight in the first period. But I think they'll go back to him.

Putting is the most important part of golf and makes up half the game

I had always done kind of, I'd have kind of putting matches with my dad. And so I was already [good]. And that ends up being almost half the game. So I'm okay. Pretty good putter.

I personally guarantee Terry McLaurin will be on the Commanders next season

I personally guarantee that they're gonna pay him more guaranteed money and he's gonna be a commander next year. And that's a guarantee.

I am the undisputed greatest chess player of all time

I'm not sure I'm the right person to, to ask really, but I don't mind. That's that's completely fine by me... I feel like I'm, I'm getting there. So, that's all I can ask for.

I am currently the best at every single format of chess

At the moment I would say that I, I'm definitely the best at every, at every format that we we play. And honestly, my closest competitors are still the, the old guys, guys around my age. So yeah, the kids, they're good, but they're, they're not quite quite there yet.

I avoided going near the windows of my 14th-floor apartment for two weeks because I was afraid of falling through them

Roughly between one and a half to two weeks... I didn't wanna get close enough to the window. Like say, God forbid I asked the, the leasing lady, she said this double pane thick glass. But like if you were to go through a window at the 14th floor, you're, you're f-ed. You're done... I made sure I wasn't like putting pants on or anything close to it.

The Thunder will beat the Pacers in five games

Hank you think it's it's over. Yeah. Five games. You're already calling it over.

The Indiana Pacers will win one home game in the NBA Finals

I'm gonna say the Pacers are gonna win one at home. They're gonna win one of game three or four. And if I'm wrong, who cares?

Victor Wembanyama will kill everyone next season after training as a monk

I do feel like this is gonna be [Wembanyama] fucks everybody up next season because he's Yeah. He's figured out like secret ancient martial arts.

The Stanley Cup Final will go seven games

This one I I said before the series seven games no matter what. Done deal. And now, I mean, how do you see this not going seven? It's, it's just, it's incredible and I want it to go seven.

The winner of the 2025 US Open at Oakmont will be over par

I think based on what I've been reading and seeing on Twitter, like we might have like a a over par winner... I want that. I love that about the US Open.

The best way to lower your golf score is to get good from 100 yards and in

If you wanna get good at golf, number one I'd say is get good from a hundred yards and in. 'cause then all your bad [shots] drop... get in the hole in three shots, you know, like you're gonna, your scores are gonna get lower so much quicker.