Takes

Aaron Rodgers will run for vice president

I think he's gonna do it. I think he's gonna run for vice president. It's gonna be hilarious. I don't know if he's going, is he gonna retire or is he gonna try to do both? That's the real question.

Tiki Barber is a loser for calling Saquon Barkley 'dead' to him for joining the Eagles

Tiki Barber, you're a loser dude. Dead to me. You are a loser. Some people, particularly radio personalities who will remain nameless, criticize [Tiki] for having a vision or a dream. Also, Tiki Barber... when we talks about like loyalty, you're not the guy to talk about loyalty. That was a crazy reaction by him.

Jayden Daniels will be the best quarterback in the 2024 draft class

My preliminary ranking is, I think Jayden Daniels will be the best of them. He's the most improved player I've ever seen in my entire life. I probably rank him slightly... them and Caleb Williams one and two.

JJ McCarthy is not a first-round talent and is being 'forced up' by the media

I don't love JJ McCarthy. I don't see it. I just don't see it. I'd take him in a second round. I think the league is guilty of... the draft cult. One says it, so two says it... All of a sudden they all convinced themselves that he should be a high first round pick. And that's how mistakes get made.

The 2021 QB draft class might be the worst of all time

We now have though the 2021 draft in record time might be the worst quarterback draft of all time. Trevor Lawrence number one, Zach Wilson two, Trey Lance three... Mac Jones 15. So there's five quarterbacks drafted in the first 15 picks in that 2021 draft, and four out of five of them just three years or in the fourth year will be on different teams.

Caleb Williams will be a great franchise quarterback for the Bears

Caleb Williams is gonna be really good. He's gonna be really fucking good in the NFL. He's gonna be really good for the Bears. I feel that in my bones... Everyone just chill out. Caleb Williams is getting drafted by the Bears and he's gonna be a franchise quarterback for the Bears.

Purdue will win the National Championship this year

I think Purdue's gonna win it. I remember Tony Bennett lost to the 16 seed... following year won a championship. Purdue last year lost to FDU... I feel that it's their year. I think they're gonna win the national championship this year.

I'm betting $100,000 total against the Oakland Athletics this season

I think I'm gonna bet a hundred thousand dollars total against either the Athletics or the Chicago White Sox every single game this season... officially decided I'm betting a hundred thousand dollars against the Athletics.

Boobs are officially back in pop culture

I told you Sydney Sweeney has done it. I think boobs are back guys. Yeah. That, that picture all time... Sydney Sweeney has done it.

The 'Patriot Way' was actually just having Tom Brady

I think they finally realized that the Patriot way is just having Tom Brady on your team... my counterpoint to that would be if the Patriots decided to answer all the questions and be like gregarious with the media, it wouldn't matter. 'Cause they still have Tom Brady.

No one will ever hit 40,000 career points in the NBA again

The craziest thing about Lebron 40,000 points is I don't, I don't think anyone's gonna hit it. Like I don't, even though the scoring is crazy in the NBA right now, I was looking at it and Luca has 10,000 points in six years, but to say Luca can play to be 40 years old with his body, no offense to his body would be a jump.

The Patriots documentary 'The Dynasty' is a hit piece on Bill Belichick designed to help Robert Kraft

This documentary, I think it's having the reverse effect that Robert Kraft thought it was gonna have. ... It's so clearly slanted towards Robert Kraft, but it's so, so slanted towards Robert Kraft that it's completely making me hate Robert Kraft and unnecessarily like they're going over the top to Slan it. They blamed Aaron Hernandez on Bill Belichick. Yeah. And basically made it like Robert Kraft was trying to save him.

Engagement parties for men are 'a joke' and 'bullshit'

Engagement Party's a joke guy for guys. For guys. Yeah. Yeah. That's a fucking joke. Engagement party is the most optional thing in the world. Engagement party is a fucking bullshit thing that no one should even have or be invited to.

Sydney Sweeney is bringing back the era of 'tits' over 'asses'

My who's back of the week is Sydney Sweeney. She was on SNL. ... People are saying, is Sidney Sweeney bringing back tits? Well, there's been don don't know. What would you say? A decade run where asses have been number one. ... We might look back in history and be like, when did Tits come back? Sidney Sweeney.

The presence of Bill Belichick and Mike Vrabel on the market will speed up coach firings next season

I think the fact that [Vrabel's] out there, the fact that Bill [Belichick] is out there, I think it speeds up the coaching firing cycle next season when teams are ordinarily making moves. We get to Thanksgiving. Usually. Sometimes there's a move that is made early in the year. One stray firing, oh, Carolina fired Frank Reich. But usually teams wait till after Thanksgiving and then they start trickling in. I, I think it wouldn't shock me if we started getting stuff like if late, late October, early November, because teams want to go talk to Vrabel. They want to go talk to Belichick.

The Texans likely would have drafted Bryce Young if they had the #1 pick in 2023

If the Texans had lost that game and gotten the number one pick in that Draft, if that had happened, I think they might've taken Bryce Young. And I don't know if they would've traded the pick, which means Chicago wouldn't have Caleb Williams, which means they wouldn't be shopping Justin Fields this year.

The Maple Leafs will beat the Bruins in the first round and win the Stanley Cup

I am hoping that they draw Boston as a first round matchup... I feel if the Leafs end up matching up with Boston the first round. I think they beat 'em and then they go on to March to win the Stanley Cup.

Someone will eventually get seriously injured during a court storming

It's dangerous, man. Yeah. and it is. It's dangerous now. And we've had significant injuries over the years... Something bad's gonna happen. And when it does, we're gonna have the audacity to be surprised at it.

There should be a 'free fight' rule allowing players to defend themselves against court-storming fans

I think like if there should be a rule that if you're a player and a fan comes at you, you can just go hog wild on 'em. Free the free fight rule that I've had for a very long time. Let the players have a free fight.

Kyle Filipowski was not seriously injured during the Wake Forest court storming

I just, I think he's probably fine. I think it might've been a phantom roll of an ankle. Like, oh shit, we lost and I just shoved the guy possibly—ow my ankle hurts now my arm.

Julian Edelman is the 4th greatest New England Patriot of all time

In the number four spot... Friend of the program. It's Jules, it's Gronk. Great guy. Jules. Gritty receiver, basically. Fought through seven concussions against the Seahawks. Made a miraculous catch against the Falcons. Super Bowl MVP against the Rams. Wow. Julian Edelman.

Big Dom's suspension is the definitive reason why the Eagles' season fell apart

The report is essentially that Big Dom was a lot more than just a security guard. He was essentially Nick Sirianni's emotional support animal. And when he got suspended from the sideline, Nick Sirianni spiraled outta control was fighting with players. And Big Dom is the reason why their season fell apart. And I 100% believe it.

Big Dom is the most important person in the Philadelphia Eagles organization

Big Dom is the most important person in the Philadelphia Eagles organization. I think we can all agree on that. He's a leader of men. Big Dom is a leader of men.

John Calipari is on the hot seat because the 'meme' has become the reality

At some point the meme becomes the reality. I don't think they're gonna fire him. He has a lifetime contract... but Kentucky fans are absolutely ready for a change though. Absolutely. If he fucks this up, he's completely lost the magic.

Adam Silver is the number one cuck commissioner in sports

Adam Silver though. He kind of, is he the number one cuck commissioner now? He doesn't do shit. I mean, Roger Goodell, he does get bullied, but he gets bullied by the owners.

Doc Rivers is an unlikable snake who stabbed Adrian Griffin in the back

Doc Rivers is really unlikable. He had the balls to, after taking someone's job and saying he was working for the Bucks as an analyst... You can't complain about a job that you stabbed somebody in the back for.

Canada will not win a Stanley Cup anytime soon

Also Vancouver too, Vancouver what they've done this year, but I don't think Canada's gonna win a Stanley Cup anytime soon.

The Maple Leafs won't win a Cup because their fans are mean to them

I think it would strictly be because their fan base is too hard on them... They have one bad period or one bad game, they're sell the farm, get rid of everyone. I think their fans just need to be a little bit nicer than the players.

Mac McClung should be ineligible for the NBA Dunk Contest because he is in the G-League

Mac McClung should be ineligible because he is not in the [NBA]... That is the NBA dunk contest, not the G League dunk contest. If you're going to do that, just bring people off the street.

LeBron James would choose a retirement tour over winning a fifth NBA title if he were being honest

If you had true serum with LeBron right now... I think he might take the Retirement Tour [over a fifth title]. The fact that he's pretending that he like will be reluctant in any way on this Retirement Tour is the most ridiculous comment I've ever heard.

Mark Zuckerberg is an animal and would defeat everyone on the PMT crew in a fight

Zuck is a beast... Zuck would take us down. I hate to say it but kind of an animal. He gets smoked and he... yeah.

LeBron James no longer does the little things like boxing out or transition defense

LeBron is the best player I've ever seen... But he doesn't do the little things that I think are really important in basketball anymore. He doesn't do those things anymore... you lose your guy boxing out all the time. You don't get back in transition. You lose guys on these baseline cuts.

Mind-controlling teammates in Dungeons & Dragons is acceptable because it isn't the real world

This is d and d. It's different than the real world. I don't feel bad... Scre it. This is fake. This is fantasy life... I actually controlled your mind and brought you to the promise land.

College football overtime should have no kicking

Do you know what they should do? They should do college football overtime. No kicking. You just like, it's just score a touchdown from the 25. Everyone can hit a field goal in the NFL from 25. I'm just saying you just only can score a touchdown.

I can still play in the NFL and am not technically retired

Can I still play in the NFL? Yes. Yes. Are you retired technically? No. I have not put in my paperwork or, you know, signed my anything with like the trust or anything like that. I've done that on purpose because I didn't want to have to do it twice. But no, I, I just train every week like I'm a player and then if I get the call, I'm ready to roll.

I ran a 4.38 forty-yard dash on camera last year

I ran a 4, 2, 5 last year. So you're faster than you've ever been. It was hand times. But then they actually went back and timed it on the camera and then it was a 4, 3, 8. So we'll go 4, 3, 8. I'm cool with that. Listen that, that's faster than I've ever been to be honest.

Brock Purdy played the quarterback position better than anyone else this year

If you just look at Brock Purdy stats from the regular season, you'd say he was the best quarterback in the NFL this year. Lamar was the MVP, Brock Purdy played the quarterback position better than anybody in the NFL. He's a creator. He creates plays for them, not just with ball placement, but with his legs.

Patrick Mahomes is the second greatest quarterback in history after only six years

Mahomes is either gonna have two Super Bowls in his six years, or he is gonna have three Super Bowls. So he'll already have been the second greatest quarterback in NFL history. In six years. It's crazy. He's on a Brady track.

It's a failure if the Chiefs don't win three Super Bowls in a row

I would actually go as far as to say if they don't get three in a row, it's a failure.

Patrick Mahomes is on pace to be the greatest athlete of all time

Patrick Mahomes is on pace to be the greatest athlete of all time. He's got six years and he is a hall of fame, no doubt, first ballot Hall of Famer if he retired tomorrow.

Kyle Shanahan might not be a 'clutch' coach

I was like, can a coach be clutch? You don't normally hear about coaches being clutch. Maybe Kyle Shanahan's just not clutch.

Maxx Crosby will win Defensive Player of the Year next season

I will be putting a wager on Maxx Crosby to win Defensive Player of the Year next year. I think next year, Maxx, you're gonna win the title next year. I really do.

Marquez Valdes-Scantling will score the first touchdown of Super Bowl 58

Are we so happy with Valdes-Scantling? [Big Cat: Okay, down. It's in.] Now that's gotta be a big number. Marquez Valdes-Scantling first touchdown.

Taylor Swift should have dated someone on the Panthers to learn that life isn't that easy

I don't wanna say anything negative about Taylor Swift, but that that just, it it, it's unfair that Taylor Swift was basically introduced to the NFL this year. And she's already in the Super Bowl... she should have dated someone on like the Panthers. Yeah. Go to Bank of America Stadium Week 16. That's a fact. I wanna see David Tepper pouring a drink on her.

I am intensely attracted to Tiffany Gomas

I have such an intense attraction to Tiffany Gomas. It is, it's actually, I am, I'm obsessed with her... I follow her on Instagram. I even like leave comments like 'looking good girl'... I think the thing I'm most attracted to is that there's a real, a mental issue there... I'm really attracted to her.

The Larry the Goldfish tattoo looks bad because I used a frozen dead corpse as the reference

I never told you guys. 'cause I knew I would've never heard the end of it... [The tattoo artist] asked for a reference picture. And I was like, whoa, I can get a reference picture. He's in the freezer so let me go take a picture... he had already done the full dead tattoo on my body where I was like, oh my God, this is a dead goldfish. I could've just Googled goldfish and it wouldn't have mattered.

The 49ers will stop Patrick Mahomes in Super Bowl LVIII

I put in the biggest bet of my life on the 49ers. And I feel like we can stop Patrick Mahomes. ... We can be the ones to do it. This is it. ... We can do this. We can be the ones to stop him.

Indiana is scared to play Indiana State in basketball

Do you know that Indiana state, Indiana doesn't play Indiana state because they just embarrassed him every time they play him. Indiana State, I think last time they played 'em was like 2017 and they won by like 20. Damn. So Indiana's just scared of 'em.

Florida wide receivers have a better work ethic than receivers from other states

Florida wide receivers are probably the most one. ... I believe that Florida receivers have an entire different work ethic and grind than receivers from other places. ... They're working on their feet. Like what you looking for? They got ta ta they got some of this, they got some of that. But you know, I feel like all of them, you know, they need to get a psychiatrist and, and just, and just share with them some of the things that they went through.

I'm rooting for Travis Kelce to propose to Taylor Swift on the jumbotron to watch the internet break

The one thing I am rooting for is I hope Travis Kelce proposes Taylor Swift. That would be awesome on the field after... I root for it because all the swifties would have to do mental gymnastics to be like, that's so cute... I want it like to be on the jumbotron and then Swifties have to be like, that's so beautiful.