Takes

Tom Brady was in talks to be a limited owner of the Miami Dolphins

He was retiring. I mean, there were other plans he's doing a movie. He was talked about as a limited owner of the Miami Dolphins. His family was at like, the decision had been made. He was retiring and we reported it.

Tom Brady will not play again this year, but might get the itch in July

Today I would say not going to play again today. Well, listen today, March 2nd, as we tape, I don't think he's going to play again, how he's going to feel in July and August when people are going back to training camp... he may get the itch.

Russell Wilson will be the starting quarterback for the Seahawks in 2022

Russell Wilson is the starting quarterback for the Seahawks to start the season. I would, I would think that that would be the case.

The NFL should put Carson Wentz in Washington just to watch PFT's soul leave his body

Carson Wentz. I, I think we should put them in Washington just to see PFT's soul leave his body.

Dan Snyder has zero intent to sell the Washington Commanders

I can't see Dan Snyder ever voluntarily selling. ...I don't think so. I, I think he he's got zero, zero intent to sell.

Jim Harbaugh will not pursue an NFL job again after returning to Michigan

He said back to Michigan, not going anywhere else. I actually think, I believe him. I think he's very honest about that... when he says he's going back to Michigan, he's not doing that again. I believe that.

Madison Airport (MSN) is an 8.6 out of 10

Final ratings... I'm going to say now this is obviously on a curve because the regional airport... I love how small and quaint it is. I'm going to give it an eight on eight and a half. ...PFT: 9.1... Hank: 8.1... Let's say 8.6 for the people. 8.6. It's a pretty good rating.

Wisconsin will probably be a two-seed in the 2022 NCAA tournament

now we're sitting here in the call center and they're a two seed, probably a two seed. At least I don't want him to be a one seed. That's too much pressure.

I am a phonetic reader, so Jakob Poeltl's name is Jacob Puddle

We've learned on the show—I am a phonetic reader. Jacob Puddle. I said Yaka Pearl. I'm seeing Yaka Patil. Either way, he told me her name.

Zion Williamson is a better player when he is fat

I'm going to say something controversial. I think that Zion Williamson is a better player when he's fat. I want him to get fat. Well, in fact, well he D he doesn't play right now. He's a better players to get fatter. Yeah. He just needs to get so fat that they roll them out there.

Ja Morant has become the most likable young player in the NBA

I also think that Ja Morant has become maybe the most likable player, the most likable youngster in the NBA.

Hugh Jackson is using his foundation to commit tax fraud

You know exactly what [Hugh Jackson] is doing. He's giving money to a foundation that you can write off and then paying probably his wife and then giving $4,000 away... tax fraud. ... [He] is Side-Show Bob stepping into rakes.

Kyler Murray will go play baseball when he's 28 years old

It's wild. I don't know how this, I mean, yeah, they're going to pay him and then he's going to be upset and he's going to be more upset and they're not going to win. He's going to be more upset. And then he's going to, I feel like when he's like 28, he's gonna be like, I'm going to go play baseball.

Derek Jeter sabotaged the Marlins on purpose

I, you know what I agree with Marlins man. Yeah. I think Jeter fucked up the Marlins on purpose.

Juwan Howard needs anger management

I actually don't think anyone who said Juwan Howard should be fired was an idiot. I actually do think he needs anger management.

Handshake lines in college athletics are outdated and should be removed

and shake lines in general for college athletics is, I mean, it's just like, it's outdated. ... what do you expect after a heated, competitive game sportsmanship, but we got rid of them with COVID and I think that should have just been like the [end].

Bronny James could probably start for Williams College as a 16-year-old

somebody was just asking me, honestly, I'm not, I'm not qualified to speak on it. I'm not tapped into high school basketball... [but] I'm going to say, I'm gonna say probably just for like just sheer athleticism from, you know, I've had the, the Williams debate a lot division three basketball.

Anyone who thinks my shooting slumps are related to my podcasting is an idiot

I always on my podcast say like anybody who thinks that my shooting is related to how much I'm doing a podcast is a fucking [idiot]... if you think that me stepping aside for 45 minutes a week to do a podcast [is the cause]... guys are doing whatever they're doing... hours and hours streaming video games.

The best kicker for a football team would be someone who is extremely dumb

I said that like the dumbest kicker that you could ever find would be great for a football team. Cause you never, you never get in your own head. He just doesn't even understand the moment, you know, it's just like, doesn't even register.

A lion would beat a jaguar in a fight

I feel like a lion, right? King of the jungle? Yeah. They're way bigger.

The 2021 Michigan team was built specifically to win one game against Ohio State

It's kind of something that I had thought at times... your team was built to win one football game against Ohio State. And it's built under the assumption that if we're able to beat Ohio State, then the rest we can take care of.

English literature majors can graduate college without attending in-person classes

Problem is now that I have actually have in-person classes, I just don't go because I'm too used to smoking weed and playing video games. So I was just wondering if I can graduate without going to class for the rest of my college career... Yeah, you sure can. It's called being an English major.

To graduate college, you either have to read the book or go to class—you don't have to do both

the tip I always give is I would either read the book or go to class one or the other, you pick one or the other and you'll be fine. I would either go like, if I didn't want to read the book, I'd go to every single class. If I didn't feel like going to class, I'd read every single book on the list because they basically give you all the answers in college.

You often learn more by cheating in college than you do by actually reading

I'm also a big fan of just the grind set in general... sometimes you learn more by cheating and learning how to pass that way than you would actually learn from reading.

Tim Tebow was a virgin when he won the Heisman Trophy

Tim Tebow was a virgin and he won the Heisman Trophy.

The week of July 4th is the best time of the year

Off the top of my head, I love the week of July 4th. Love this barbecues, Sunday drinking, sweating NBA. Well, it used to be the NBA free agency, right? I love that big fan of the first two weeks of March Madness.

Thanksgiving week is a top-tier time of the year for sports and food

I love Thanksgiving week feast, week college, basketball, football, everything I love this time of year.

The only time you can't say 'I love this time of year' is the two weeks after the Super Bowl

I think the only time you can't say I love this time of year is right after the Super Bowl until right now, that's it. That's the only time you can be like, [this sucks].

Tom Izzo is overrated

I picked a really bad time to unearth the Tom Izzo is overrated thing.

Drew Timme is soft because his shoulders are too small

I have a critique of Drew Timme. I think his shoulders are too small. They sink down a little bit. They're too small. He doesn't have—you can't play in the low post without man shoulders. He's got like Reggie Miller shoulders.

Providence is a legitimate threat to make the Final Four

Providence look 24 and three. Yes, they've won some tight games, but overall 24 and three is 24 and three. So I think they can make the Final Four. So why not?

I would wake up and potentially go to Ukraine to defend freedom if the embassy sent me a ticket

The boys and I are about seven beers deep and considering the free plane ticket from the Ukraine embassy to go defend freedom. We'll wake up and totally don't not do it, but we getting hype RN.

Tommy Tanks is the main attraction of college baseball

Tommy Tanks he's on NC state. I believe it's seven home runs in his first nine... he's kind of the main story, the main attraction of college baseball this year with no [MLB] baseball going on, it's getting even more heightened coverage.

James Harden is the perfect piece to pair with Joel Embiid

I do think the Sixers are very good now. James Harden's perfect piece to pair with [Embiid], but it's going to piss people off, especially that James Harden has now done it twice where he's skinny all of a sudden again, he feels great and he just duped everyone.

I can break Vegas with a specific March Madness hedging spreadsheet

I'm thinking I'm going to take all the favorites from the first round and bet all of them to win the whole thing as a future. And then bet the money line on all of the underdogs so that the money lines pays all the future bets.

I will never admit to losing a race, even to Randy Moss

I'm never going to say I'm going to lose a race. One of the guys that probably would have presented the biggest challenge probably would have been Darrell Green. I just talked to him the other day too, man. He probably would have been the one that presented the most challenge in the prime.

95% of college football players are not going pro

I want these kids to go into the workforce and make a difference, man, because 95% of my [kids] are not going pro. That's for every program, 95% of the kids play for you are not going pro.

NIL deals at Power 5 schools are often just booster kickbacks, not real endorsements

Tell me what have you seen them [Power 5 recruits] endorse? ... How can you get a million dollars worth of endorsements for a kid at these power fives and nobody sees nothing? ... At least if you say you're going to do something, we got to at least see it. The NCAA should hold people accountable if they say they got a deal.

NFL QB Rankings: Aaron Rodgers #1, Patrick Mahomes #2, Dak Prescott #3, Josh Allen #4

Number one, Tom Brady's retired... Aaron Rodgers is one. Mahomes is two. Dak is three. Four, I'm going to go with my guy from Buffalo, Josh Allen.

Ben Roethlisberger should have retired three years ago

Big Ben should have retired three years ago. You know what? Everybody knows, but nobody said [it].

Troy Aikman will leave Fox to join ESPN's Monday Night Football

ESPN will be Chris Fowler and Troy Aikman.

MLB will realize people don't miss baseball as much as they think if the lockout continues

If baseball doesn't start the season and play a full season, they're going to learn very quickly that they miscalculated the world's need for baseball. I wouldn't notice fully until like late June and be like, where the fuck is my baseball?

People under five foot nine should not be allowed to lead countries

If you're five foot nine or less, you should not be in charge of a country. I will fully admit my people [short people] have a deficiency and that's like, we like to try to take over the world to prove everyone... we should not be allowed within 50 miles of a nuclear missile.

I'm not a buyer in Auburn; they have fatal flaws at the end of games

I'm not a buyer in Auburn. I think Auburn's got some fatal flaws. I don't trust them at the end of the day, if you're going to your fourth option in an end of the game scenario like that, that means that you don't have any true scoring threats that can like you can't run an ISO.

Tom Izzo is a fraud and extremely overrated as a coach

I'm finally being vindicated on my take I've been squatting on for six years... since 2016, about Tom Izzo. You think he's a fraud, that he's overrated... If you're saying he's an all-time great, he's definitely overrated.

If Kentucky is healthy, they are winning the national championship

Gun to head, if Kentucky is healthy, they're winning it all. If they're healthy, I really think they can win it all.

I'd rather have 11 Mitchell Trubiskys playing every position than Carson Wentz at quarterback

I saw that the Washington Commanders were targeting Carson Wentz as their quarterback. I would rather literally have 11 Mitchell Trubiskys playing every position than Carson Wentz at quarterback.

Prime Cam Newton is the ultimate choice for a team of 11 clones

Prime Cam Newton without a doubt would be [the choice]. I'm switching mine to prime Cam Newton... think about how big and strong and fast he is and can throw. He would have the one thing prime [would need].

By the end of the year, Cost Plus Drugs will carry 2,000 generic medications

Right now we've got about 110 different generics at costplusdrugs.com. By the end of the year we'll have 2,000. So if you have any type of prescription, check it out, you know, if we have your drug, we will save [you money].

The 2022 NBA Dunk Contest was embarrassing and the stars don't care enough about the fans

The dunk contest, I know it's not a big deal, but it was lame... It does feel like the stars don't care as much about the fans. Like that to me is like, hey, fans are investing in this, why isn't anyone want to step up to the plate?