Takes

I still believe I can dunk a basketball by January 1st.

I still think I can do it. I need to lose some weight... I still need like five inches. I'm 180 pounds. I was like 171 pounds in July. So I need to lose some weight basically.

Bo Nix is the Taysom Hill of passing

If you've ever wondered what Taysom Hill would look like if he was a little bit better at passing and a little bit worse at running, you got the full Bo Nix Taysom Hill experience tonight because Sean Payton was doing the old Taysom Hill playbook for Bo Nix.

The Saints are officially on 'Quit Watch'

The Saints are officially on quit watch. Dennis Allen, Richard Sherman said at halftime, he's like, they're trying to get Dennis Allen fired. I wouldn't be shocked. And the Saints are just like—this was so—this was a bad game.

NFL Week 7 is a massive trap weekend for favorites

Just remember that on Monday it was reported that it was the worst weekend Vegas has had in like 20 years. It was one of the best weekends for favorites of all time. So this is a trap weekend. Watch out. Don't fall for the traps.

I officially apologize for hating on the Buccaneers

I've retracted my take. I've done some soul searching about the Bucks. I apologize for saying the Bucks aren't very good. It is a hundred percent Chaps bias. I sat with Chaps for an entire game watching him and it just—it sits with you and it really eats away at you.

The Packers' all-white 'Winter Warning' uniforms are a disgusting affront to football

The Packers going with the all-white uniforms and all-white helmets are a disgusting affront to football color rush. It's a disgusting front. The Green Bay Packers—and I hate them—their football jerseys and color scheme are football. They should never do any type of gimmicky alternate bullshit. If you're a Packers fan, you should be disgusted by this.

Jerry Jones should trade Micah Parsons to reload on draft picks

If I were Jerry Jones, reload on draft picks and trade Micah Parsons. You have to pay him and your problem right now is it seems like you have lack of depth going forward. What's gonna happen yet? You locked up Dak, you locked up CD, you're gonna have to pay Micah Parsons. You could probably get a lot for him.

Nick Sirianni will be fired if the Eagles lose to the Giants

I'll say this right now, if the Eagles lose to the Giants on Sunday, Nick Sirianni will not be coaching the following week. He'll—he will be done. I think he will be fired.

Mike Tomlin is starting Russell Wilson to prove he's bad and go back to Justin Fields

Mike Tomlin, a man of his word, is like, I know I have a better chance with Justin Fields, but I promised Russell Wilson he's the starter. He's gonna throw him out against the Jets to basically have him suck. And then he's gonna be like, 'See, you guys told me I need to start Russell Wilson. I told Russell Wilson it wasn't his job to lose. He sucks. Justin Fields!'

Winning the Pro Bowl should grant players a 'reverse card' on the franchise tag

Especially think about the guys that are in that game... Or no franchise tag. Like they get basically an Uno card reverse on a franchise tag if you win the Pro Bowl. I feel like that—Roger Goodell, give us a call.

Determination and hard work make a champion, not just talent

I don't think I'm the most talented guy. In fact, I think talent is very important, but I think talent doesn't make you a champion. Talent doesn't put you in the top of the game. Like, there's only one thing: is your dedication, your determination, and your hard work. Because the most talented people, for some reason, they are not always in top of the game.

The Davante Adams trade was a masterclass in PR by the New York Jets

This is actually a masterclass in PR by Woody Johnson and his son, Brick Johnson and the entire New York Jets organization because they didn't even let the media have a single news cycle where we're talking about what happened on Monday night. And also thank you for just wiping that memory of that game out of my brain immediately.

Aaron Rodgers will eventually play for the Minnesota Vikings

I have been hoping for the last two years that the way this would all shake out for Aaron Rodgers is he goes to the Jets and then he goes to the Vikings. He does the Brett Favre. Like the guy he started his career out hating the most. It's like you become your parents at some point in life when you get older.

A head coach cannot have a beard as long as Jeff Ulbrich's

I don't think you could have a beard that long as a head coach. I'm just saying in terms of if you're looking at a head coach, like if you're mocking up a head coach, when are you drawing in a massive beard? The beard just doesn't give head coach vibes.

College football is better than it has ever been

I have a belief now that college football is better than it has ever been. And I know there was a lot of handwringing going on with all the changes happening. But we're now in a spot and there's gonna be more change. I get it. Expansion, all that stuff with the NIL. The NIL and the portal flattening it out. So it doesn't feel like this year, maybe Texas, but it doesn't feel outside of Texas that there's those like two or three super teams that no one has a chance against.

Texas is inevitable and is in a tier by themselves

Texas, to me, Texas will learn a lot about them this weekend. I feel like they're inevitable. I feel like this is Texas and then everybody else.

I am 100% confident the Washington Wizards will get Cooper Flagg

All I'm saying is I've never been as confident. I've never been as confident in my life of anything as the fact that the wizards are gonna get Cooper Flagg. I'm willing to tell you right now, I will stand on this hill and I will plant my representative banner to say that we're getting Flagg.

The Ryder Cup pricing is a mistake that ruins home field advantage

People are very upset about the prices for the upcoming Ryder Cup. Next summer at Bethpage... it's $750 for a day. Normally I would say golf fans probably have expendable money... but this is such a fuck you and a mistake to trying to get a home field advantage. If you price out rowdy New Yorkers who want to go to the Ryder Cup and scream heinous shit at all the Europeans, you've completely ruined this.

The Chargers at 45-to-1 to win the Super Bowl is an incredible value

I've decided to put a future on the Chargers to win the Super Bowl. They're 45-to-1. I don't think they're gonna win the Super Bowl. I do think we'd get in a spot where they get to the playoffs and we could potentially hedge. This is Jim Harbaugh's team. This is Jim Harbaugh's football team. I think they're gonna get to 10 wins.

Eli Manning is the greatest big-game quarterback I have ever seen

People argue with me, I get it. But he's the greatest big-game quarterback that I've ever seen. I mean the way he approached things and the fact that he really accepted the challenge. He wanted the challenge... I've seen him do it under any circumstance you can imagine.

I will not drink alcohol until Thanksgiving to train for my dunk attempt

I'm going. I'm not drinking till Thanksgiving... I'm training every day. It's not something I've like forgot about. Overdrive.

The Commanders' Super Bowl window is officially open.

I will announce that the Super Bowl window for the Commanders is officially open. This is the start of the Super Bowl window. Wow. We're not a Super Bowl winning team this year. I'm not thinking soupy this year, but I know when I see it, we have a Super Bowl window. We got a fuck load of cap space. we have a great quarterback. An awesome quarterback.

The Browns are publicly shaming Deshaun Watson by forcing him to continue playing quarterback.

What if we're just thinking about it wrong? What if this is just the Browns actually doing justice in a public shaming way. They're like, he's so bad. And we know he is so bad he can't play quarterback. We're just gonna make him continue to play quarterback and publicly shame him because that's the only justice he'll ever have. ... The only way that the league can punish him? Make him continue to play quarterback.

Nick Sirianni is having a mental breakdown.

Nick Sirianni after the game or while the game was still going on, looked into the crowd and started basically getting in an argument with the Eagles crowd... Has he lost his mind? He also shaved his head. Which which is a classic sign of losing his mind. ... Siri's showing up today. I think that everybody thought the same thing. Like this is, we saw what happened with Britney Spears. Is Siri in a conservatorship?

Nick Sirianni and the Eagles will have a mutual parting of ways at the end of the season.

I don't know. I think his time is, I feel like, honestly I feel like it's gonna, at the end of the year be a a mutual, a mutual parting of ways. ... He doesn't like if that's the way you're gonna react to like the fans acting like the fans have acted in Philadelphia for a hundred years.

Joe Flacco is the better option if the Colts are trying to win football games right now.

And Flacco, he makes a couple mistakes, but they're no worse than any Anthony Richardson mistake. And then he's at his best. ... I mean, I think if you're trying to win football games, that's what you're supposed to do. Then you should start Joe. It's that simple.

I give Drake Maye a solid B-minus for his first career start.

I'm gonna give Drake Maye a solid B-minus. ... [A] bad interception. ... He did get pressured a lot. He did, you know, get thrown into the fire. But he threw a couple really nice deep balls. A couple mistakes. But it was, it was exciting.

The Texans might actually benefit long-term from Nico Collins being out because it forced Tank Dell and Joe Mixon to step up.

My idea that the Texans might actually end up benefiting long-term for Nico Collins being out this tank dell had his best game of the season. Joe Mixon was a awesome, again... I think the Texans are gonna be better off [because of the variety of scoring].

The Lions have the best roster in the NFC by far.

I think they're the best roster in the NFC by far. ... I still think that the Lions are, are good enough to still, we can still say I think they have the best roster in the NFC. ... I'm not saying the Lions are bad. I just don't, I don't think the Bucs [are in that tier].

The Panthers should put Bryce Young back in because they aren't winning with Andy Dalton anyway.

Why don't the Panthers just put Bryce Young back in? ... What's the point in not playing him when you're not gonna do anything this year? I know that it's probably, you know, you're, you're wishing on a lottery ticket. But what's the point in not playing him when you're not gonna do anything this year? ... The gambler in me would be like, what if a one in a hundred chance he just, something clicks and he's good.

I find myself actually liking LeBron James after watching the 'Starting Five' show on Netflix.

I have been watching, there's a lot episodes, so I'm, I'm not finished with it. But the NBA starting five show on Netflix. ... I do find myself like liking LeBron... He's funny. ... Like he's just, it's just the, he's funny. He's just a big goof.

Brock Purdy is just flat out good

Brock Purdy's just good. He has wheels. He is moving around. He's throwing guys open. Yeah, he's good.

The Phillies are in a downhill spiral and their window is closed

Philly's lost the game. They looked like shit. It's exact same thing that went on from 2009 to 2011 of the Phillies... and then what I am saying, yes, it is the same thing. Like it is just a downhill spiral with no World Series. There's no hope. There's no hope. And the window's closed for every team.

The game against the Jaguars is a must-win for the Bears

This is a must win for the Bears. You got, this is the meat of your schedule, right? This is the, this is the, you got make some hay time. I'll be a very sad boy if the Bears lose this game.

I will quit on the Titans if they lose to the Colts in Week 6

This will be my, I'm quitting the Titans if they lose this game. But I'm not, I'm not taking the Titans. It is my last, last line in the sand.

The Cleveland Browns will beat the Philadelphia Eagles

Browns money line. Eagles are bad. The vibe in that stadium is going to be horrendous. They're going to get booed within one incompletion. No one expects anything out of this Eagles team. The Browns are going to win.

AJ Brown will have a huge game against the Browns because they play single high safety

The Browns run a majority of single high safety. Guess who dominates single high safety. AJ Brown. AJ Brown's got feast in this game. All the overs come on.

Tim Tebow would have won a lot of games if an NFL team ran his college offense

If I run his college offense, I'm going to win a lot of games in the National Football League. He'll never make a Pro Bowl, but I want that guy on my team... nobody ever gave him a shot [after Denver]. Nobody ever gave him a shot. I, I just believed in him winning football games.

Dak Prescott is not a Super Bowl winning quarterback

I'm just not buying. I don't believe I've, I've seen enough. I know what he is. And what especially he is not, he is two and five in the postseason. And every time a big moment has come in a postseason game that is begging to be won, he's not there. He's safe, and you know, he's going to put up gaudy enough numbers to be somewhere on the fringe of the MVP race... but they'll be just good enough to be a factor, just good enough to be relevant.

Michael Jordan was the worst team builder in the history of sports

Michael Jordan as the team builder in Charlotte, who was the biggest disaster of a general manager in the history of sports. The greatest performer and player in the history of sports was the worst team builder in the history of sports for low those many years in Charlotte. Because he couldn't see why can he play and he can't.

LeBron James was born without a clutch gene

The poor man was just born without a clutch gene, and we see it again and again and again. MJ or LeBron? Stop it. Don't even go there because it's offensive to me. You would put those two in the same sentence because LeBron could not carry Jordan's sneakers.

Bronny James might not be able to play in the NBA

I've seen 14, 13 minute stints in two preseason games... it's Summer League all over again. I saw him share the floor with his father for the first time ever, and he plays 14 minutes and he turns it over four times and he scores zero points. And I'm saying I, I don't know if he can play. Seriously. What if his son just can't hack it?

Aaron Rodgers is a serial coach killer

[Aaron Rodgers] is a serial coach killer. Mike McCarthy and [Robert Saleh]. If you kill two people, you're a serial killer.

The Jets interim coach Jeff Ulbrich will succeed because he is a wrestler

Jeff Ulbrich, he's got to work out because when it comes to interim head coaches, you either need a fat guy, or you need like an ex-player hardass... He looks like the ex-player hardass linebacker... Being a wrestler, I feel like is a big, big plus in the interim head coach power rankings.

The Chiefs will win the Super Bowl again

What the Chiefs are doing is very dynasty Patriots-esque... They're just really, really good and they're going to win the Super Bowl again and we just all have to come to grips with that.

The Patriots are starting Drake Maye specifically to sell throwback jerseys

Do you think this is because they're wearing the throwbacks and if they win, they're going to sell a shit ton of Drake Maye [jerseys]? Patriots throwbacks... You're absolutely right. Because why wouldn't you do it against the Jaguars?

The Phillies are dead and they are a soft baseball team

The Phillies are dead... The Phillies are a soft baseball team. The Mets are a hard baseball team. They're a tough baseball team. They come back from things. And the Phillies just don't, they just die.

Aaron Judge is not a true Yankee because he doesn't perform in October

I don't think he's a true Yankee, Big Cat, which is so funny to say because he's objectively one of the best hitters of his entire generation... but not a true Yankee because true Yankees, they get it done in October.

Ashton Jeanty should sit out the rest of the season to protect his NFL draft stock

With the state of the running back position in the NFL where you have to maximize your healthy years... Is it crazy to think maybe Jeanty should just sit down for the rest of the season? I would agree. He's already got a season's worth of stats.

Bob Costas is horrible at broadcasting baseball and should stop

Bob Costas... He just sounded, he's broadcasting the Yankees-Royals series and he sounds horrible... He has all the money. He doesn't need to do it. I don't get why he chooses to do it.