Takes

I would un-retire and return to the Packers if they offered $1 million per game

If the Green Bay Packers called you up tomorrow and said, we'll give you a million dollars a game. Come back for the rest of the season. You doing it? Yeah, yeah, I'm doing that. I am un-retiring, yeah. If they're doing that, I'm back.

The Rams will announce an extension for Jeff Fisher immediately following their next win

Right now, after the Rams' next win, they're going to announce the extension. He's getting out in front of the story right now, laying a nice mattress down so that nobody's shocked. Next win of the Rams, they're going to use that as the premise to announce an extension.

The Super Bowl will feature some combination of the Patriots, Cowboys, or Seahawks

And it sucks to say this, but it's going to be the Patriots and the Cowboys or the Seahawks. Slash Seahawks, yeah. So some combination of that, that's where we're going to be in Houston. And I don't feel good about it.

Tom Herman will win a conference championship before Ed Orgeron

Who wins a conference championship first? Tom Herman? Coach O? Oh, I think Tom Herman. Because Coach O is – I need to see who he's going to bring in to run his offense... But the road that Tom Herman has to take is going to be so much easier in the Big 12.

The 2016 Big Ten Championship game is rigged for Wisconsin to win

The Big Ten titles game is going to be rigged in favor of Wisconsin this time. Because last time, the 59-0 Ohio State. That was rigged. Wisconsin. Gary Anderson was fired recently. Left right away. It all makes sense.

I'm taking the Lions to beat the Vikings on Thanksgiving

I'm going to take the Lions because I took the Vikings on the Pick'em podcast. That's how you keep yourself even there.

I'm taking the Steelers to beat the Colts on Thanksgiving

I got the Vikings, I got the R-words, and I have the Steelers.

The loss to Kansas is the definitive end for Charlie Strong at Texas

I want to do basically what I think is the dagger in Charlie Strong's contract and job there in Texas... Kansas, the dagger in Charlie Strong's heart. Can you believe it? A new coach is now going to be at Texas and at LSU.

I'm jumping on the Cowboys train and betting on them for Thanksgiving, which means they'll probably lose

How long am I going to keep doubting the Dallas Cowboys? They're now nine and one against the spread... I'm going to bet on them Thanksgiving Day. And they're going to get, I don't know if they'll lose, but they're not going to cover the spread.

Robert Griffin III will lead the Browns to their first win and his free agent stock will soar

That would be the most Robert Griffin triumph of all time is if he led the Browns to their one win. And then, guess what? Stock goes way up in the free agent marketplace.

The Raiders will beat the Texans in Mexico City as the 'Don Julio Shot of the Week'

And then the Raiders in Mexico City. Hey, what do you say we make that our shot of the week? Don Julio, Mexico tequila. O-Cart Julio. O-Culio. O-Culio shot of the week. Darkheart shot of the week.

The Redskins will beat the Packers in Week 11

And I'm going to walk right into it, and it's going to snatch me up, and I'm taking the Redskins... So I'm going Redskins.

The Patriots will blow out the 49ers in Week 11

Hank, I agree with you on the Patriots. I think they're going to kill the 49ers.

If Brad Stevens became available, Indiana would fire Tom Crean immediately

I don't think it would matter if Indiana was good or not. If Brad Stevens became available... You just fired Tom Crean. Yeah, Tom Crean is gone.

I want to play in the NFL for at least eight more years

I wanted to play in the league for at least eight years to the minimum. I mean, at least at least it's going to go at least far further.

If Wisconsin wins out, they will lose to Alabama by 50 in the playoffs

This is a classic year where I start to tell myself, oh, maybe the Big Ten is really going to be back. And then one of those teams, probably Wisconsin, if they can win out, goes to Alabama, plays Alabama, and loses by like 50-7 or something like that.

Every NFL team that passed on Dak Prescott will be draft shamed forever

Dak Prescott has been named the starter. He was drafted 135... You could have had Dak Prescott. And people will remind you every single day... Everyone gets draft shamed now that Dak Prescott is officially the starter and a superstar.

Donald Cerrone is a strong betting value against Kelvin Gastelum

I got to say I see value on the Cerrone side. He's been unstoppable as a welterweight... To me, a guy like Donald Cerrone, who you know brings it the way he does in that minus 155 range... would be appetizing to some betters.

Tyron Woodley is a live underdog against Stephen Thompson

Tyron Woodley can do it all, and he's going to have to wrestle... he does have the bigger power shot. So to me, plus 166, plus 170... I think there's a little value there... don't sleep on Tyron Woodley. I think he's a live dog.

Conor McGregor has a great chance to knock out Eddie Alvarez in the first round

I think there's a great chance Conor McGregor gets [Eddie Alvarez] out of there in the first round, to be honest with you. Connor's that specialist striker... Connor's left hand is no joke man and i don't know i think he lands and he finds it

The Jaguars +1.5 will cover against the Texans

I like the Jaguars plus one and a half.

The Steelers will win by two touchdowns against the Cowboys if they have any pride

That Steelers game is actually one of those. Like if the Steelers are any good and have any pride, they win by two touchdowns against the Cowboys.

Kanye West has a real shot to win the presidency in 2020

I think Donald Trump winning 2016, Kanye has a shot in 2020. I mean, people like him a lot more than they like Donald Trump and Donald Trump won the landslide.

Sylvester Stallone will run for president in 2020

I'm going with Sly. I'm going Sylvester Stallone. I think this country started down a path of celebrities. That path started with Schwarzenegger a long time ago. Jesse Ventura was the original. I think the next step is Sly.

Barack Obama will admit that aliens exist before he leaves office in 2016

In 2016, as we switch presidents, the current president is going to admit that there are aliens out there which will probably spurn a world government because we'll all have to get together and be like, it's bigger than just us.

Jeff Fisher only gets fired if the Rams have a real collapse this season

I would say it would take... This year, it would take a real collapse. What the hell does that mean? You know, it would have to be like... We no longer have faith in this person... to direct this team toward winning.

John Gruden will never coach again because his TV life is too good

I don't think John Gruden will ever coach again. He has the best life ever... He makes like $6 million a year, whatever it is... Works one day a week. Plays golf.

Jay Mariotti will be the White House Press Secretary for Donald Trump

Jay Mariotti is going to be White House press secretary, and he's going to make sure that only respectable journalists get a seat in that crowd. It all makes sense to me. He was playing the long game.

Chip Kelly will leave the San Francisco 49ers for the Oregon head coaching job.

So Chip Kelly rumors are back, and I think he's going to go to Oregon. Then again, he did say he's not interested in it, and as we know, as Nick Saban proved to us... if a coach in the NFL says they're not going to college, that means they're not going to college.

The Charlotte Hornets will have a 4-1 record by Monday.

Actually, we're probably not going to have this interview until Monday, so what's your record going to be then? Probably 4-1.

Wisconsin will beat Ohio State in the Big Ten Championship Game after Ohio State beats Michigan.

Ohio State is going to beat Michigan, then meet us [Wisconsin] in the Big Ten championship game, and Wisconsin's going to beat Ohio State.

If Jimmy Butler wins NBA MVP, PFT Commenter will get a sex change.

PFT says that Jimmy Butler is not a top 20 player and that if he – he's not going to win MVP, but he has thrown this out there that if Jimmy Butler does somehow win an MVP, PFT is going to get a sex change.

Spencer Hawes is on pace to record 55 dunks this season.

I actually told Frank before the game I'm on pace for about 55 dunks.

The Dolphins offensive line is fixed and the Jets are bad

I'm going to go with the Dolphins. I think their offensive line is fixed and going to play well, and I think the Jets are frauds. Not even frauds. They're just bad.

The Titans will lose to the Chargers because they spent too much emotion on their Color Rush game

I don't like the Titans. They're coming off an emotional color rush game against the Jaguars, a rivalry match, so I think that there was a lot of emotion spent in that game that they're not going to be able to pull out.

The Patriots and Seahawks will meet in a Super Bowl LI rematch

I think you're right about the Patriots. Who are they going to lose to? I'm taking Seattle. rematched of the game two years ago. I think their offensive line eventually gets straightened out.

The Sacramento Kings and Brooklyn Nets will both fail to win 50 games this season

Neither the Nets nor the Kings are going to win 50 games this year... by the power in Pardon My Take and all that are curses and witchcraft.

Aroldis Chapman's ankle will be swollen and he will feel the injury in Game 7

Tomorrow it's going to swell. [Chapman] is going to feel it. He's probably, I don't know, maybe he's got some recovery water... but tomorrow it's going to swell. He's going to feel it.

The 2016 World Series is engineered for the Cubs to win in seven games

I think that this has all been engineered behind the scenes, and you're going to be the one that reaps all the rewards. So congratulations in advance on tonight's World Series champion, your 2016 Chicago Cubs.

Next year is finally Tennessee's year and Butch Jones needs one more season

I'm going to say that you've got to give Butch Jones one more year. He's got a good recruiting class, and next year is Tennessee's year. I really think so.

Jeff Fisher will start Jared Goff in the next three to four weeks to avoid being fired

I'm going to call my shot. Within, I'm going to say, three or four weeks, depending on the record, I think Jeff Fisher is going to make the call. He's going to move Jared Goff up. And at that point, you can't fire a coach when he's developing a quarterback. So that's going to buy him two more years.

The Washington Capitals will win the Stanley Cup this year

I like Washington. I can't get away from it. Everyone says it's their time, I'm telling you... they're so deep and you can tell that they're kind of almost one of those teams [waiting for the playoffs].

I am 70% confident that the Cubs will force a Game 7 in the World Series

I'm 70% confident that the Cubs can get to Game 7. [Then] Game 7 is 50-50. Game 7 is a coin flip.

The Bears will lose to the Vikings on Monday Night Football

No, the Bears are going to lose to the Vikings. Actually, I'm 100% confident in that.

The Cowboys will stick with Dak Prescott as long as he continues to win games

If Dak Prescott continues to win games, then the decision is you roll with the hot hand... I think they are going to stick with Prescott as long as he keeps doing well.

The Vikings will eventually find a spectacular way to blow their season

I know what's going to happen. They're going to find a way to blow it, and maybe in a spectacular fashion... Either way, they're going to find a way to blow it. It's either going to be the offensive line that crumbles... or it's going to be Blair Walsh missing another field goal.

The NFL will move to an 18-game regular season within the next five years

There's a chance it will if the NFL makes enough concessions to the union... if there's a way that they can address that issue [player health]... it's going to happen.

LSU will lose this week because Coach O cannot handle the extra time of a bye week

I think LSU's fucked this week. My sabermetrics is you can't give Coach O two weeks to do anything. Coach O has to have a game a week... You don't spend 14 days studying 2 plus 2 equals 4. That's too long to study that.

Gus Bradley will be fired by the time this podcast airs

I want to quickly talk about Gus Bradley. Because by the time this podcast airs, I'm guessing he's going to be fired. This is a situation where they might not let him back on the plane.

The 76ers should sit Ben Simmons for his entire rookie year

Honestly, I feel like they're not going to want to rush it. Like why would you rush back a number one pick and risk him getting hurt again? So why not just sit him out the whole year?