Takes

Roman Anthony is a defensive liability for the Red Sox because everyone is successfully running on him in left field.

Roman Anthony, world baseball classic hero. But he has been, he's become a meme basically. If he can't, he just can't throw anyone out from left field. Everyone's just running on Roman. Shane tried to tell me he was great last year, but he was playing right field. Now he's playing left field... it's just not good.

Space exploration isn't interesting until we actually land a human on Mars.

I kind of just don't care until we go to Mars. Call me when we're at Mars. I wanna see us on the moon again. How is that possible that we went on the moon in the sixties and we just never went back on it? Go to Mars or go back on the moon.

The $1.2 billion valuation of the Enhanced Games is a fake number.

The enhanced games just got valued at $1.2 billion. And the enhanced games... are the steroid users alternative to the Olympics. It's being run by Peter Thiel. It sounds like it's a fake valuation because it just sounds good to say $1.2 billion.

The Masters is 'above' selling gimmick hats with pimento cheese on them.

The Masters shouldn't have hats that you could like, that says like Peach on it, right? Pimento? I just feel like the Masters is like above that. The Masters has such a cool logo and they're so like strict with it that like that's all they need, you know?

Inhaled 'Protein Hookah' will revolutionize bro culture

A doctor claims that inhaled protein enters the bloodstream faster and absorb more efficiently. It's kinda like weed. All I'm saying is like keep your eye on this technology. Because it has the opportunity to revolutionize bro culture.

Tiger Woods should just never drive again

He should just never drive again.

If Tiger makes the cut at Augusta a week after his DUI arrest, it would be the most impressive sports story in the last 10 years

What if he played well? How would the announcers talk about it? I think they'd immediately jump to like what a redemption story this is. Tiger making the cut out of Augusta after getting arrested for DUI seven days before — is this the most impressive sports story that we've had in the last 10 years?

Puka Nacua's lawyer is the worst in America for admitting the bite occurred

Puka has hired an attorney who dismissed the conduct as horseplay, but admitted that the bite occurred. It left a temporary mark. So this is not a good lawyer. My problem is, is Puka Nacua has hired the worst lawyer in America to defend him against the biting allegations. Your lawyer should never step in front of a camera and say, 'yes, he did the shit.'

Being the designated TV remote guy at a bar is a 10 out of 10 job

Had dinner at a local establishment last night and was informed that someone on staff was the designated TV remote guy to switch between games. No bartending, no waiting tables, just ball. 10 out of 10 job. You don't do this job without immense pride. It's the best job ever.

NVIDIA's DLSS 5 is an AI takeover that is hurting graphics and animation jobs

Nvidia did a, our, oh, I don't know the stock hand off the top of my head... they announced a product DLSS five. So they're, they're bringing AI into like video games, animations and like graphics. So like kind of boxing out guys. Like people who, like jobs that would've been done by humans are now more getting outsourced. AI not cool.

I am against prenups because marriage should be forever

I'm against prenups. Because if you're getting married, you're never—you're getting married to be together forever. If you really love someone, the money shouldn't matter.

If your relationship is built on the Chili's Triple Dipper, you will make it

If the foundation of your relationship is the Chili's Triple Dipper or bottomless chips and salsa, you're gonna make it. They're not thinking prenups or joint bachelorette parties.

Floyd Mayweather is running out of money

My Hot Seat is Floyd Mayweather. 'cause I'm starting to think Floyd Mayweather might not have a lot of money left. ... It feels like Floyd Mayweather shouldn't be fighting this much at his age.

Fanatics and Nike failed American fans by not producing enough USA hockey jerseys after the gold medal win

My Hot Seat: Fanatics and Nike... They thought that Canada was gonna win the gold, so they just did not make enough USA jerseys. And so by the time USA won the gold, they were already sold out. It's disgusting. Drop the ball.

Heat 2 will be a 'disgusting' (great) film starring Christian Bale and Leonardo DiCaprio

My Cool Throne: Heat 2. Christian Bale. Leonardo DiCaprio. Disgusting film. Hell yes. I trust Jake Hamilton. He reported it. Christian Bale, Leo DiCaprio, Heat 2. I'm in. Awesome.

The UFL's three-point conversion and no punting rules are too gimmicky

The UFL just unveiled their rules today. A little bit gimmicky. They're doing a four point field goal for long field goals. You're not allowed to punt inside the 50 yard line. And then they've got one, two, and three point conversions. I don't like the banning of punting inside the 50. Field goals are worth three points. We don't want more field goals.

Wendy's is having a 'rebuilding year' in fast food

Wendy's is to close hundreds of restaurants in 2026. And what interim CEO Ken Cook calls a rebuilding year. ... They're tanking for draft picks. Trust the process.

Midweek college basketball is better than the NBA

That's why I love college basketball so much, especially this time of year where every game feels so important... there's nothing like these college basketball games, a midweek game where the crowd and you get true home court advantage. And it feels like there's big, big time stakes.

LeBron James is the face of the NBA until the day he retires

As long as LeBron's in the league, LeBron is not only the face of the league, but definitely has a weighted opinion on basketball... LeBron is the face of the league until he is no longer in the league.

My dream retirement is to hire a pitcher I can hit home runs off of every single day

My dream is to have like a shit load of land and build a baseball field... I wake up on a Tuesday at 9:00 AM, I go down to my baseball field. There's a pitcher down there who's gonna pitch me and I'm just gonna go fucking yard on him over and over and he's gonna be like, 'fuck, I don't have it today.'

I love Ben Johnson for saying 'Fuck the Packers'

He was asked on Monday about his 'fuck the Packers' comments and everyone freaking out about it and he did not apologize. And I absolutely love it. ... I want Ben Johnson to be the outsider who like is like, fuck all of you, I'm here to do a job.

Bobby Petrino is a man of character who will clean up the North Carolina locker room as offensive coordinator

Bobby Petrino is going to be their new offense coordinator for next season. And I think that's a great hire. This is fun that Bobby Petrino, a man of character can get in, clean up that locker room and, and really change it from being a circus into a, a run of the mill workman like professional football organization.

The NCAA Tournament is the most fair tournament in sports

My Hot Seat is Joel Klatt. He said that the NCAA tournament is a joke. ... Most unfair tournament in all sports? It's the most fair.

The College Football Playoff should expand to a 16-team format

We do love Cinderellas in the first couple of rounds. And this is why they should go to a 16 team playoff and we should give the Cinderellas a chance. I'm excited to see JMU play. Fuck it.

Miami deserved a spot in the College Football Playoff over Notre Dame

You can't eliminate the fact that the games need to matter. It's why we said that Miami should be in over Notre Dame. It's why that if you win games, you should have a seat at the table.

LeBron James is officially obsessed with golf

He is checked out. He's got the bug. He's officially obsessed with golf. I would like to see his YouTube stats... I think he's deep into the Pop Does Sports Universe. He probably watched the Internet Invitational.

The 'Haters' were right about Jayden Daniels being injury prone

The haters were right. Congratulations. Jayden's shut down for the season. RG4, injury prone, made out of glass. ... Haters were right. Can't say anything to the haters. Focus on next year.

The NBA Cup means nothing to me

I'm excited to watch the game. I just don't care who the NBA cup means nothing to me. ... There's no way you'll be able to be like, oh yeah, 2025. That was the year the Spurs won the NBA cup.

Cooper Flagg is fully activated after his 40-point game

Cooper Flagg may have fully been activated. He has reached full activation. 18 years old. 40 piece in regulation. ... If we're talking just highlight tapes, he's looking good.

The future of the NBA is in Victor Wembanyama and Sam Presti's hands

I would say the future of basketball's in [Wembanyama] and Sam Presti's hands. ... The Thunder are also in Dodger land. They are in Dodger land. ... Which is insane 'cause they're doing it with a cat.

Notre Dame's relationship with the ACC is irreparably harmed after the CFP snub

Notre Dame is now going scorched earth on the college football playoff and more specifically the ACC. The athletic director, Bevacqua... saying that the ACC absolutely fucked them over, that they did irreparable harm to the relationship with Notre Dame. This business relationship might be done.

JMU is not one of the best 12 teams in the country

I'm not saying JMU is one of the best 12 teams in the country. I think that that would be an insane take to have. I'm just pumped that we're in it.

LeBron James is officially in his stat-padding era

My Cool Throne is LeBron because congratulations to LeBron. He kept his streak alive of scoring 10 games, which is a totally made up streak... Can we just admit that LeBron's in his stat padding time, like it's fine. It's fine.

Jamis Winston is the 'new Slash' because he is an elite athlete at multiple metrics.

Rob, my hot seat is Cordell Stewart, Denard Robinson. All these offensive weapons... because there's new sheriff in town who, Jamis. Yeah. Jamis... He is first in the NFL for yards per route run. He is third in the NFL for his percentage of carries going for 10 plus yards... he's the new slash.

The 'Players Era' tournament is ruining the tradition of Feast Week college basketball

The players era fucking sucks. There's not even a real tournament... They've taken away and no one's in the stands there. Feast Week used to mean something, man.

James Franklin is leaving a $50 million buyout because he has a competitive drive to coach, not just for the money

I feel like you don't get to a point where you are successful enough to get a $50 million buyout unless you have that like killer instinct, competitive drive. ... James Franklin's going after being an awesome coach, coaching, he needs football to live.

Ja Morant has lost his joy for basketball and is beefing with his coaches

My Hot Seat is Ja Morant... lost his joy. He's beefing with his coaches. This was like a week or so ago, but he was, you know, getting pushed in a press conference... and then last night he just said he's lost his joy.

Trix Yogurt is an elite-tier snack

TRX Yogurt is elite. The best. No free ads, but that's a good free ads. Do they exist? ... TRX Yogurt was discontinued in 2016... but it's since returned to the market.

Dua Lipa and Callum Turner's 'same book on a plane' meet-cute story is fake

I just can't, I couldn't help myself but to bring up this story 'cause it's just so fake... He revealed that they were reading the same book the night they first met. We sat next to each other on a plane... it's too much. Fakest plane book story love story of all time.

Sherrone Moore's 'blue-collar' jacket is a cheap, ineffective imitation of Jim Harbaugh

[Sherrone Moore] has his blue collar jacket on and he basically was like, Hey, I'm back to work. ... It worked for Jim Harbaugh because Jim Harbaugh had won... This feels like a cheap knockoff and it's not gonna work.

Conor McDavid's team-friendly contract was designed to make him easily tradable to a contender

This seems like it would be very easily tradable. Very, very easily tradable contract. He basically, I mean smart by him. If in a year and a half the Oilers aren't competing and he can go somewhere for a year and a half and it doesn't fuck up some team's cap.

Jalen Hurts catching his own Hail Mary rebound would be the coolest play in sports history

The wide angle of the Hail Mary came out and Jalen Hurts tried to get his own rebound. ... I'll say this right now, if that ever happens, that will be the coolest play in all of sports. ... That was sports history. If there, the fact that he got as far down as he did was... if there was a, if there was two bobs, he would've been there.

Bill Nye and Weird Al are the two people whose cancellation would wreck my childhood

I respect Bill Nye just as a human. He would be probably top five for me in terms of if Bill Nye was canceled for being a scumbag... that would wreck my childhood. It's him and Weird Al. Those are the two big ones.

Teams should only celebrate clinching the division, not the Wild Card or DS

Clinching the playoffs is absolutely celebration worthy... I think when you win the wild card division series, it's like, this should be business as usual. Like we are, we're here now to win a championship. Let's focus on that.

Ben Simmons' career is over now that his agent has dropped him

My Hot Seat is Ben Simmons... He got dropped by his agent... if you're getting dropped, you're, you're, you must be bad, bad. You just not care. Yeah. At all. He just literally doesn't care even enough to like take a contract, bad sign. So he's just not, he's he's not represented currently.

Mike McDaniel is in trouble because analysts like Rex Ryan are starting to mock his 'nerd boy' persona

My Hot Seat is Mike McDaniel because now it's open season. Rex Ryan called him McGenius... called him said McGenius guy or whatever the hell he is. Nerd boy. Their team has no respect for their coach. They play like that. They're soft. Every part of their football team it's over.

Winning the Ryder Cup as a playing captain would make Keegan Bradley an all-time legend, perhaps better than winning a major

If he wins as the playing captain, you're an all time legend. All time... Winning as a playing captain might be better than winning a major. I think I could see that being the truth.

Number 47 is a terrible number for a BYU quarterback

Bear's a bad start. You can't. You put harder earned money on a team and you see a quarterback coming out wearing number 47. Terrible number for a quarterback.

Auburn adding four historical national titles is the beauty of college sports

Auburn football won four national championships today. They updated their official national titles. They added a championship in 1910, 1914, 1958, and then most notably they added 2004. They finished the season undefeated, but they didn't get invited. This is kind of the beauty of college sports. That you can just claim whatever you want.

MLB cannot let Shohei Ohtani win MVP because of the gambling and real estate controversies

I mean it, you can't, if you're the MLB, you can't have Shohei Ohtani with all these controversies being the base of your league. The gambling one, yeah, maybe blame it on the interpreter. Fool me once, shame on you. Fool me twice... we're about to give this guy his fourth MVP in five years? MLB writers really need to do like justice here because they are the keepers of the game.