Takes

The Patriots would have won Super Bowl 60 if the Cooper Kupp bobble had been challenged and overturned.

I don't know why they didn't challenge that in real time. That was like, that's a bobble. And then it was clearly was a bobble. If he didn't, if they didn't, if they reviewed it and it gets overturned, they didn't even get a field goal... I think we win. [Sliding doors effect].

The Patriots will win the Super Bowl by 50 points

Any divisional rival... Do I not want [Seattle] to win? ... Patriots by 50. That's what I've said all week.

The Super Bowl halftime show is for chicks

The Super Bowl halftime show is—is—is for chicks... I don't think the average NFL fan is like, man, I hope this Super Bowl halftime show is awesome. I don't give a fuck.

Giannis Antetokounmpo might be traded to the Chicago Bulls this week

Second [favorite to land Giannis] is Chicago Bulls at plus three ten... the rumors of him to the Bulls have always kind of been there being like, he loves Milwaukee so much that he's not gonna leave living in Milwaukee and commute. Which he could do, but it would be the most ridiculous thing ever.

Shedeur Sanders making the Pro Bowl will be the death of the game

This might be what kills the Pro Bowl. We've been begging for the Pro Bowl to die. It's been on life support and it's been time to pull the plug for a while. And maybe the fact that Shedeur [Sanders] made it, that should be the end of the line.

Matt Nagy might be the next Eagles offensive coordinator

Can I throw out a name that maybe has misplayed his hand a little bit? Matt Nagy... maybe Matt Nagy is the guy. He is from Pennsylvania 'cause he played quarterback at Delaware. So maybe he's ready for it.

Jared Stidham might have a vestigial tail that acts as a biological gyroscope for his balance

J Stidham might have a tail. An actual tail. ... Everybody was thinking that J Stidham might have a tail. ... if you have a tail, it helps you balance. It acts like a stabilizer. When you're twisting, when you're throwing, it's a biological gyroscope.

The New England Patriots are the scrappy underdogs of the 2026 NFL playoffs

I've enjoyed being the, the scrappy underdog that no one believes in... no one's believed in us.

The US government will confirm the existence of aliens this week

Aliens might drop this week. Like, like there's aliens might drop this week... [The White House] might confirm the existence of aliens as early as this week. And just be ready for the outcome of that.

The NFL magnetized the goalposts to increase the number of 'doinks'

The goalposts are magnetized since the NFL put chips in the ball. Doinks are way up. I have zero data, but the timing is suspicious and the sound is too perfect.

TV companies are intentionally degrading the quality of old game broadcasts to sell 4K TVs

I think somebody's going back and making the feeds worse... If you try to watch a game that's from the year 2009. Yeah. Online. Yeah. It, it looks like it was shot in a, a basement camcorder situation... I swear to God, when we watch football in 2009, it looked good on tv. It didn't look like that.

The Bears are just going to win the Super Bowl

And I, in that moment [after the Cole Kmet touchdown] was like, I think the Bears are just gonna win the Super Bowl. They're just gonna, they're just gonna pull Miracle After Miracle, because that play was so dead.

Bo Nix's injury was a 'soft benching' by Sean Payton

Is this the most high profile soft benching of all time?... Think about it. If, if, if Sean Payton benched Bo Nix, everyone would riot. Now he's got a fractured ankle and he's going to Alabama and it's Diddy [Stidham], his guy.

The electrical substation next to the 49ers facility is causing player injuries by dehydrating their cells.

The wireless stuff, basically it dries you out on the inside. So have you ever taken a rubber band and like left it out in the sun and it goes from being nice and stretchy to being brittle and snaps? ... there's been a lot of research in the past 50 years... showing that it can cause cause harm at the cellular level by dehydrating yourselves among other things.

The Rams are the favorites to win the NFC

I don't know what the odds are right now, but [the Rams] feel to me like they might be, in my mind, the favorite to win the NFC.

The 49ers' high injury rate is caused by an electrical substation next to their practice field

Only one variable is unique and the players know it in their guts... Players have joked around about there being an electrical substation right next to the practice field and how that has led to the Niners injury problems... This guy went to the practice field with a gause meter. It read 8.5 plus milligauss.

The 49ers' high injury rate is caused by an electrical substation next to their practice field

The 49ers are statistically the most injured team in the NFL over the past decade since moving to Levi's stadium... Only one variable is unique and the players know it in their guts. ... Players have joked around about there being an electrical substation right next to the practice field and how that has led to the Niners injury problems. ... This guy is saying that the Niners are just getting bombarded with electric waves all day, which is fucking up their bodies.

NFL teams should consider Pete Carroll for their head coaching vacancies

There is a name out there that I think these teams should consider for head coach and he's not a hot young guy. Okay. He's a hot old guy. What about Pete Carroll? Someone should give a look at Pete Carroll.

Bo Nix is 'dog phobic' because he is secretly a dog himself

He is afraid of dogs because he's worried that deep down inside... he's gonna have to tell his parents 'I'm a dog.' I think he's trying to suppress his inner dog because he knows if he becomes the dog that bit him, it's watch out world. He got bit by a dog as a child and became a dog.

Mike Tomlin has to be fired by the Steelers

Regardless of what happens next week, Tomlin's gotta go. I mean, he just gotta go. It's stale. He has a losing record in the playoffs. He refuses, he changes offensive coordinators all the time. Defense coordinators, the seasons all look the same... everything is always the same because it's Mike Tomlin.

Lamar Jackson has radiation poisoning from getting too many MRIs

Do you think Lamar Jackson has radiation poisoning? Mm. From all the MRIs. Too many MRIs and all the x-rays... It might be like Chernobyl.

The Cleveland Browns will cover the 10-point spread against the Buffalo Bills

I do like the bills, but I think the Browns might cover... I like the Browns at the very least in the first half of this game. I like 'em to cover 10 points.

The Kansas City Chiefs should just quit for the rest of the season since they are already eliminated

There's never been a team that like deserves to quit more than the Chiefs. They've been playing so much football for the last five years... Patrick Mahomes just tore his ACL. If you're a Chiefs player, listen to this right now. Just fucking quit.

Joe Burrow is using a 'Jedi mind trick' to get the Bengals to trade him without asking directly

I think what [Burrow] is trying to do is make the Bengals decide to trade him so that he doesn't have to say, I want to be traded and get them to recognize he's not happy... I think he's trying to do the Jedi mind trick to get them to trade him without him having to ask to be traded.

The Arizona Cardinals are guaranteed to move on from Kyler Murray

They want to be able to move on from Kyler Murray and they're gonna move on from him. They're probably gonna have to release him. And then the question becomes who wants him?

AJ Brown will likely be traded by the Philadelphia Eagles this offseason

I won't be surprised if AJ Brown is traded in the off season. I think we're at the point where it makes sense for both sides for him to move on. They can find another receiver, they can make their offense go without him.

JMU has a legitimate chance to upset Oregon in the playoff due to extreme weather conditions

We have an atmospheric river coming here... you're going to get a sloppy game with potentially some James Madison fans there against an Oregon offense that's missing Corian Moore... Is it going to happen? Probably not. But it could.

Oregon can win the National Championship behind the maturity of quarterback Dante Moore

What do you need to make a great run in any playoff... you need a quarterback who's going to take control... he [Dante Moore] has absolutely just matured into a guy who's now completed almost 80% of his passes in the back half of the season.

The Steelers will win a playoff game this year

I think the Steelers, this is the year that they're going to win a playoff game. I've set it all year. ... If they can play the Chargers, if they can get that matchup, I feel like they could win that one.

Quinn Ewers should start for the Dolphins now that they are eliminated

Why not play Quinn Ewers? ... I am intrigued. I'm questioning whether or not I wanna see Quinn Ewers play. ... You might as well roll the dice though, if you're the Dolphins.

I bet on the 49ers to win the Super Bowl at 21-1

Yesterday I put a future in on the 49ers to win the Super Bowl. 21 to one. ... If the Seahawks beat the Rams, then the Niners have a chance at it. ... They have a real chance to get the one seed. And I kind of like how Brock Purdy's been playing.

JMU isn't like Liberty; they will be competitive in the playoff

We're not fucking Liberty, dude. We have sex at James Madison University. It's encouraged, it's mandatory. ... If one of those teams keeps it competitive, they might not change the format too much.

Travis Kelce will likely retire after this season

If I'm Kansas City, first of all, we gotta figure out what's Travis Kelce gonna do and it, you know, I would guess that he's gonna retire, but I have zero inside information on that.

Jayden Daniels is the worst quarterback from the 2024 draft class

My preemptive take of the year was right. Commanders would miss a playoffs and Jayden Daniels be the worst out of all the quarterbacks in 2024. [Big Cat: 'Michael Penix?'] He looked pretty good before the injury.

Kyle Pitts will eventually have 20 touchdowns in one season

I predicted that Kyle Pitts will have the greatest year of any tight end of ever in year 20 in the NFL. He'll have 20 touchdowns. That's a fact.

Kalen DeBoer would pick up the phone if Michigan called him for their head coaching vacancy

I do think Kalen DeBoer would pick up the phone. Obviously he's got his hands full right now with the playoffs.

The Packers look like Super Bowl favorites

I think that the Packers looked like the team that would be maybe favored to win the Super Bowl the way they played today.

JMU will cover the +21.5 spread against Oregon

JMU's in the playoffs. We were playing against Oregon... I bet on JMU to cover at 21 and a half when the line came out. I think that there's a good chance that JMU can cover that.

Mike Tomlin and the Steelers are likely to break up after this season

My Hot Seat is Mike Tomlin and the Steelers. Because I actually think that he might, this might be it... they don't change anything. And it's, I mean, TJ Watt said it. I think the bills ran the same play 27 times on Sunday. Yeah. That's insane. It feels like this is finally [the end].

The 'Blob' weather pattern could mean the end of the world

B-Big Cat, We are Earth could be finished. We could be done... There's a world, the blob never goes away... I do wanna say you're right. I was being dramatic there. Blob will go away, but it's sinking its toes right now.

Texas should not be in the College Football Playoff because they lost to Florida

I have a take and, and people will probably say this is wrong, but it's my take... Texas is out... That Florida lost. I know they have three very good wins... that's not a playoff team.

The Kansas City Chiefs are officially eliminated from playoff contention

The Kansas City Chiefs have been eliminated from playoff contention... I just don't think that they can run the table because that's gonna be it. It's hard. These aren't the same chiefs.

The New York Jets will acquire Lamar Jackson from the Ravens next season

I do go to bed and I just thinking who's the next quarterback will be next season. And right now we're on Lamar Jackson... Ravens don't make the playoffs. Raven's good organization. They've moved on from quarterbacks in the past... we got like three years of Lamar.

Jeremiah Love should win the Heisman Trophy

Let me hear hear have your Alexa hear me say Jeremiah Love should win the Heisman and then get it in the algorithm.

If the Bears beat the Eagles on Black Friday, they are legitimate Super Bowl contenders

Why don't we just fucking beat the Eagles and go nine to three? Yeah. And like just start fucking ripping on. And why why don't we just keep winning games?

The Ravens will win the Super Bowl as a Wild Card underdog

Yes, of course. They're winning the Super Bowl. It's faded to be, we're going as the fucking wild card... we're gonna fucking get revenge on everyone. This will be, this is how it's done.

Colts -4.5 vs. Texans is a suspiciously low line that favors the Colts

I'm gonna take the Colts minus four and a half. I feel like the, that that's, that's a field goal line. Why is it four and a half? They know something.

Taking apart a microwave is fatal because it contains an electric bomb

Do never, do not ever take apart a microwave because you'll die. You'll get electrified. They've got like a bomb inside of them. ... You have a nuclear weapon in your kitchen.

The College Football Playoff committee is intentionally keeping JMU out because they don't want any 'presidents' in the bracket

I think it's a anti-PFT thing. I think maybe the college football playoff committee has gone woke and they don't want any presidents in their bracket. Makes sense. It's sad. I mean, just fast forward 20 years, Trump University probably will be blacklisted too.

The Anthony Davis to the Lakers trade will be seen as a win-win in ten years

Rob Pelinka texted Nico Harrison and said something like, man, I I I would do it again because I I really think we both won... It was a good trade. In 10 years, they will be singing your praises.