Takes

The Denver Nuggets winning the 2023 NBA Finals is the start of a dynasty

This is the start of the dynasty. This is, this is merely, but the first chapter that we're writing with Nuggets. If, you don't get three titles then. It's a failure.

The NFL cares less about its fans than any other major professional sport

There's no major sport that its owner group gives less of a fuck about fans than the nfl. Yeah. ... I get maximizing every dollar that you can make. But I think the NFL usually takes it to a level where you start going like, dude, is it, is it this important?

The Nuggets will be a dynasty and should win at least three NBA championships

I think that this nuggets team should win three championships. I think, I think this should be a dynasty... it will be a disappointment to me if the nuggets win fewer than three NBA championships.

Toronto is a bad sports town

Toronto was a bad sports town. Although, you know, he, he... That's just Canadians out. They, they gotta, Canadians gotta pass... They can't win a fucking Stanley Cup. And it's their sport.

Foreign investment funds will eventually buy American sports teams as prices exceed what US billionaires can afford

As the teams get more and more expensive, there's fewer and fewer people who can afford to pay for these teams. At some point, the foreign investment funds are gonna become part of the shrinking pool of available billions that can buy American sports teams. We might be on that slide down there.

Victor Wembanyama can defend the basket and the three-point line at the same time

He can defend the basket and the three point line at the same time. And I tell that to people and they go, you are out of your mind. Why would you even bother saying that? Because I'm telling you, I saw it. He'd be in the protecting the front of the rim. Kick it out to the corner and he would get out there in time to block it.

Jay Monahan and Rory McIlroy are the biggest losers of the LIV/PGA merger

The biggest losers in this, Jay Monahan number one, probably Rory McIlroy number two. Not because Rory's a bad guy, just because he was the most vocal. And Brandel Chamblee, because he really dug his feet in on the take. It's one of the saddest days in the history of professional golf.

The Miami Heat will win the NBA Championship because of the Taylor Swift curse

Every NBA team that made it to the semi-finals this year has had a Taylor Swift Eras tour stop through their city, and they've all been eliminated. The Denver Nuggets had Taylor Swift perform there... The Miami Heat is the only team that has not had Taylor Swift perform in their city. So if you're a Swifty, you know that that means that Miami is going to win these championship.

The Celtics are a better team than the Nuggets and everyone else in the NBA.

The Celtics are probably the best team in the NBA if you really look at it position by position, player by player. You know, we ran into a Heat team that was getting frisky at the right time. But we're still a better team. We're a better team than [the] Nuggets. We're a better team than everyone.

Connor McDavid is the best athlete in the world.

I'm gonna keep backing the best player I've ever seen... [McDavid] is breaking records and he's doing things that haven't been done in about 40 years in the NHL. He's joining the list of Gretzky and Lemieux every season. Watching him like night in and night out, it looks like a different league. It looks like an alien on the ice.

Jalen Brown does not know how to dribble

Jalen Brown does not know how to dribble. I don't know if that's something he's gonna learn. And then, I mean Jason Tatum obviously I think Jason Tatum probably smells the best coming out of this run... But where do you go and Marcus Smart? I don't know. Do you keep rolling out the same thing year after year?

Ja Morant is a modern-day Allen Iverson in every way

I'm almost thinking four Philly. The personality of Philly sports. I say a straight up for John Morant. Philly can handle a problematic like Alan iv. He's like Alan Iverson every way to me. Like the way he plays and his off, if there was social media when Alan Iverson was playing, he'd have flashed a gun. Oh for sure. He got caught with guns like all the time.

Joe Mazzulla visiting a hospital before Game 5 is 'Gary V adjacent' and psycho behavior

He said watching a girl dying and smiling and enjoying her life, that's what it's really all about. So he gained some perspective. It's kind of some psycho shit, but I guess it's nice... it is Gary V adjacent what he's doing. He's just reminding, he's trying to force himself to work harder by looking at people who are dying.

The Celtics will absolutely not beat the Miami Heat in this series

I am so confident that the Celtics will not beat the heat in this series. It is actually kind of freaking me out how confident I am. ... This team is lifeless. This team hates each other... and they win one game and now we have a series. ... I think the pressure's still on the Celtics.

Joel Embiid is a 'loser' who lacks 'that dog in him'

Joel Embiid? ... Kind of a loser. ... To answer your question [Big Cat] Yes. That you, there's definitively guys who do have the dog in them and don't. ... It is pretty wild to think about [how many Kentucky players score 40 in the NBA and Calipari only won one title].

Anthony Davis being ranked #53 on the NBA's Top 75 All-Time list is insane

Where's Anthony Davis on the top 75? ... 53. That's crazy. That's insane... This is just looking at Anthony Davis, the freak athlete, and then comparing him to old players that were by any objective stretch. Much, much greater NBA players than Anthony Davis.

I will retire from the NBA if LeBron James retires this year

If LeBron James retires from the nba, I will also retire from the nba. ... I wear a LeBron jersey for a year.

The Knicks should not retire Carmelo Anthony's number; doing so would be 'soft'

You should retire numbers for, for winners. Not like nice guys that you're... I'm just saying it's soft.

I would fire Joe Mazzulla right now before Game 4

If I were you, Hank, I would want to fire [Joe] Mazzulla right now before Game 4. Get Brad [Stevens] in there.

Boston as a city does not have what it takes to come back from down 3-0

No teams ever come back down from three-oh in the NBA. I don't think Boston as a city has what it takes to come down from three-oh.

D'Angelo Russell is maybe the worst player ever

Dlo [D'Angelo] Russell is maybe the worst player ever. It's puzzling how bad the Lakers have been.

Orcas will be a major problem for humans in the future

Orcas have been attacking boats off the coast of Spain recently and been training other orcas to do it too. There's gonna be an orca human problem for the future.

The Oakland A's are getting a raw deal and owner John Fisher is a piece of shit

It just dawned on me that the A's are getting such a fucking raw deal and the city of Oakland's getting such a raw deal... John Fisher. Fuck you John Fisher. Piece of shit. You fucking dick.

Jimmy Butler has more mental toughness than the entire Sixers organization combined

The Heat deserve a ton of credit cause the Heat are better than the Sixers and more than that, the Heat are just tougher, mentally tougher than the Sixers. Jimmy Butler has more mental toughness than the entire Sixers organization combined.

LeBron James has never played a player like Nikola Jokic in the playoffs

I don't think as great as LeBron James' career has been, he's ever had to play a player like Jokic in the playoffs... Jokic is such a unique force... He's averaging a 30 point triple double in these playoffs, which is insane.

It takes bigger balls to bet minus signs than to bet plus signs

A lot of people think that it's actually more courageous. It takes bigger balls to go after a minus sign than it does plus sign. Cuz you gotta lay so much on it... you're putting more money on the line.

Aaron Judge is cheating and stealing signs again

My other hot seat was Aaron Judge got caught cheating, stealing signs again, Yankees back at it again.

Putting on deodorant before going to the gym is a sign that you are cheating on your partner

It's actually, if he were to put on deodorant before going to a gym... that would be a sign he's cheating on you. Be like, why are you putting on deodorant before you're going to get sweaty?

The Process is officially dead in Philadelphia

There isn't much more to this. The Process is dead. It is officially dead. It's over. Doc Rivers is gone a hundred percent. James Harden's gone a hundred percent.

James Harden doesn't actually want to win in the playoffs because he wants to party

I actually think that there might be something to the fact that James Harden doesn't want to win in the playoffs because he gets paid regardless and he just wants to go party in the off season. Like legitimately James Harden might not want to win playoff series.

Joel Embiid cannot lead a team deep into the playoffs as the number one guy

He's clearly not a go-to guy in the playoffs. He's just not. Facts. And like that's something like even and if he does go, he is gonna go somewhere where he doesn't have to be the go-to guy in the playoffs. He can't lead a team deep in a playoff run.

Anthony Davis is better than Joel Embiid

[Anthony Davis] is better than Joel Embiid. Anthony Davis does the exact same thing but has a title. Better.

Kevin Durant's legacy is almost completely destroyed and taking an irreparable hit

Kevin Durant's legacy's taken a hit the last few years. Maybe an irreparable hit because you would think if he's the best player in the nba... you think he'd be able to get it done with a team with Devin Booker and some nice role players on the side. And Kevin Durant... your legacy right now, I'd say it's almost completely destroyed.

The Lions losing a close game on opening night is better for them than winning

I think the lions losing in a close game opening night is better than winning... Because if they do beat the chiefs week one Thursday night in front of the whole country, the lion's hype will be out of this world. It will be uncontrollable at that point.

The Celtics players don't like each other

It feels like a team that they don't like each other. The way they play is like something's off and it's not, they are so talented And then you watch that and you're like, what is that?

Julius Randle is not a good basketball player

Julius Randle is so bad. He really is like, he's so bad. There were so many times where he was like, either he'd be like, fade away three or just like Lackadaisical Pass. After the game he said maybe the Heat just won it more, which I don't think that's gonna go over well in the New York crowd.

Dan Snyder should be arrested and put in jail for tampering with Andrew Luck

Just arrest Dan Snyder. And I think that would be fine. I think that would satisfy all parties. [regarding allegations the Commanders contacted Andrew Luck].

The NHL should rig the draft lottery for major markets

If you're the NHL, you should absolutely rig the draft. Duh. This is entertainment. Yes. Listen, you're a multi-billion dollar corporation. Do you want your best players to be playing for teams that nobody cares about? Yeah. No you don't. You want them in Chicago.

Connor Bedard has the best shot the NHL has ever seen

His shot is like the best they've ever seen. Like it's, it's, it's like insane how he's able, what he's able to do and how he's able to quickly elevate the puck and he's just, he has a lethal shot. So, so, so it's it's cool. He's a phenom.

If the Maple Leafs get swept, everyone will get fired and a major player will be traded

I think if they get swept every single guy is getting gassed and maybe one of the big guys getting traded. Complete implosion. I think that if they get swept, everybody's gone.

The Seattle Kraken are for real and could win the Stanley Cup

No, they're for real. They just, so I, I didn't trust them against the Champs either. But Seattle is just such a disciplined team. They have all these castaway type players. I think Seattle could win it all.

If James Harden scores more than 30 points in a playoff game, you should sit him the next game

I'm a big believer and if James Harden scores more than 30 points in a playoff game, you should sit him the next game. Give him a nice little sit and then it's back to Philly. I'm sure that James Harden will be great in game seven like he always is.

Jason Tatum is better than Joel Embiid in the playoffs

[Jason Tatum] is the best player on the court. He's better than Joel Embiid. I'm sorry, like in playoffs, Joel Embiid, he had a very good game, but the fourth quarter he looked like the most gassed person in the world.

The Phoenix Suns are better without Chris Paul

I think in a sick way they definitely are better without Chris Paul. 100%. Because if you got Devin Booker and Kevin Durant, those guys, they can both create their own shots. They're not really reliant on Chris Paul to run their offense and they get along just fine without him.

Derma Sotogake will win the Kentucky Derby

There are two Japanese horses in the Derby this year. One of them is my pick to win the Derby. He's probably gonna be 7, 8, 9, 10 to one. His name is Derma Sotogake. And in my eyes, not only do you have the Japanese dominance right now, but he, to me, he looks like the fastest horse in the race.

Flightline was a better horse than American Pharoah

Secretariat was the best... The four best horses that I've seen... were Secretariat, Flightline, Spectacular Bid, and American Pharoah... I would put 'em in that order. And I know some people think it's heresy to say that Flightline was better than American Pharoah... but I just think that Flightline was better.

Brad Stevens should come down from the front office to call plays for the Celtics

Brad Stevens for all you know, intents and purposes one of the best X's and O's guys ever when he was coaching... He's still in the organization. Why don't they just put him on the bench and just have him call the plays at the end of the game?

The 2022-23 Boston Bruins are the biggest chokers in the history of the NHL

How do you feel about your Boston Bruins being the biggest chokers in the history of the NHL? After being the President's Cup trophy winner, they had the most wins in NHL history this year... You lost in the first round to Jake [Marsh]'s Florida Panthers.

Dillon Brooks' career might be over mentally after this playoffs

No one had a worse playoff performance start to finish than Dillon Brooks. He is a complete joke... I actually think he'll have a career, but I wouldn't be shocked if his career is just over because of this. Like mentally... he could not have had a worse playoffs.

Tobias Harris will score 30 points in Game 1 against the Celtics

Sixers are gonna win. I think Tobias Harris goes off for 30 tomorrow [tonight].