Takes

I am currently the best at every single format of chess

At the moment I would say that I, I'm definitely the best at every, at every format that we we play. And honestly, my closest competitors are still the, the old guys, guys around my age. So yeah, the kids, they're good, but they're, they're not quite quite there yet.

Victor Wembanyama will kill everyone next season after training as a monk

I do feel like this is gonna be [Wembanyama] fucks everybody up next season because he's Yeah. He's figured out like secret ancient martial arts.

The winner of the 2025 US Open at Oakmont will be over par

I think based on what I've been reading and seeing on Twitter, like we might have like a a over par winner... I want that. I love that about the US Open.

If an NBA game were only 45 minutes long, the Indiana Pacers would be a lottery team

Surely they can't do this again, right? They didn't need until 0.3 seconds left in the entire game. If NBA playoff, if NBA games were 45 minutes long, the Pacers would be a lottery team.

Joe Flacco will start Week 1 for the Cleveland Browns

Probably Joe Flacco. Yep. Just because that's the guy who you can get ready with fewer first team reps in August... I believe that they're gonna try to move Kenny Pickett before the training camp opens... Flaco will start week one and then once one of the other two guys is ready, they'll put that guy out there.

Tiger Woods is an extreme introvert who was broken by being forced into the Michael Jordan marketing playbook

It's always astonishing that no one in that room at Nike... occurred to no one that the playbook had been built around Michael Jordan, who is an extreme extrovert. And they applied it to Tiger Woods, who is an extreme introvert and like, honestly feels like they broke him.

Magnus Carlsen is no longer the GOAT of chess because he keeps losing.

I'm gonna say right now, Magnus [Carlsen] not the best. 'cause I have been watching chess religiously for almost 48 hours now. And all I've seen is Magnus lost.

Kevin Durant might be traded by the Suns this offseason.

I don't know, I feel like the seeds have been planted... I thought last year he was, there was a lot of stuff right. A lot of stuff around the draft. There was like rumors about Houston... I feel like the seeds have been planted.

The 2025 Thunder will eventually be seen as the worst version of their championship dynasty.

This is gonna be the worst thunder team to win an championship because you're gonna get so much better over the course of the next couple seasons with their draft picks. This is actually a down year for the Thunder.

Karl-Anthony Towns is the greatest scapegoat in NBA history

I think Kat [Karl-Anthony Towns] is the greatest scapegoat in NBA history in terms of like, this happened with him with the Timberwolves too. And I'm not saying the Kat is a perfect player... But Kat is not like your only problem. He's still a big guy. And you'd rather, if you have a problem on defense, you'd rather he be a large man than a small man.

The 2025 Thunder are the worst version of a team that will win multiple titles

There's a chance if the Thunder win the title this year, this is the worst Thunder team to win a title. 'Cause they're gonna probably win like four or five. This is the worst Thunder team we'll ever see to win a title.

Jordan Hudson was Bill Belichick's 'rebound' from his 'divorce' with Tom Brady

When Brady and Belichick broke up, I think we spent a lot of time using the word divorce. I think Bill might have treated it and processed it like a divorce. At the time where he's like my main, my main thing is gone now. Time to find some new strange. [Belichick] spent decades watching Tom Brady spin that thing and he is like, there's gotta be one heir apparent. And that's Jordon.

Minnesota will win the championship because Anthony Edwards has the 'sauce'

If I had to pick right now, I would say Minnesota Timberwolves win it all. Why right now? It is the aura of [Anthony Edwards]. It's the way that the aura of that young man, the way that it filters into everyone that he's playing with.

The Oklahoma City Thunder will win the NBA title

Today is Wednesday, May 21st and the Oklahoma City Thunder are going to win the NBA title. ... Oklahoma City's defense is very fucking good. They're elite. Yes. They pack the paint so well. They make you take threes. ... I think they're the best team.

Angel Reese definitely hates Caitlin Clark

I'm just gonna go outright and say it. [Angel Reese] hates Caitlin Clark. I think she does. And that's fine. 'cause rivalries are good. ... The issue with this rivalry is Caitlin Clark is just a lot better and more entertaining of a basketball player.

Tom Cruise used Top Gun: Maverick to make people forget about his Scientology controversies

Tom Cruise... Scientology thing is very weird... He just was like, yeah, I'm gonna put out a new Top Gun and everyone's gonna forget about that. ... It felt like the block was getting a little hot with the documentaries and everything. He's like, I know. Top Gun two. People won't care anymore.

Mitch Marner will not be back with the Toronto Maple Leafs next season

[Mitch Marner] ain't coming back. ... he just hasn't lived up to what, not only he's being paid, but what the hype is in, in crunch time. ... my theory would be that you bring back [Nylander], you bring back Matthews and you can build around those guys. ... he won't be back. It sucks.

Aaron Gordon is a beast for playing through a grade two hamstring injury

Aaron Gordon played in game seven with a grade two hammy. And if the Lakers were in this game, LeBron would still be two weeks away from coming back because LeBron, remember when he got hurt in the last game of the Laker season, they some, for some reason put out a timetable for his return, which no one needed or asked for.

Nikola Jokic failed the 'best player in the world' standard in the series against the Thunder

I think it's fair to hold him to the standard of best player in the world. And if he was the best player in the world, game four and seven, he could have played better and they could have won this series. The conversation of Jokic is best player in the world... can sometimes be like, I'm gonna take over this series and win this series. He didn't do that and that didn't happen.

The Caitlin Clark vs. Angel Reese rivalry is awkward because Clark is much better at basketball

Caitlyn Clark is so much better than Angel Reese at basketball that it's not, it doesn't feel fair. I actually feel bad for Angel Reese at this point. She wants a rivalry and she has history with Kaitlyn Clark, but it's nowhere near equal footing in terms of play... Kaitlyn Clark needs a different rival because this one is just not fair.

Jalen Brunson is already a top-five New York Nick of all time

I think Jalen Brunson is already a top five Nick. I think it's the list now is Patrick Ewing, Willis Reed and Walt Frazier and then it's like, yeah, Earl Pearl and then like Mellow is somewhere in there. I think he's a top five nick of all time in the three years that he's been there.

I'm leaning towards the Boston Celtics needing a rebuild

I trust Brad Stevens with my life, but I'm leaning towards rebuild ish. Probably. Someone needs to figure out how we can keep Jalen Brown and Jason Tatum and still have good enough players around them to compete. It doesn't, not a tax guy at all. It doesn't look, I can't wrap my head around it yet.

Alex Ovechkin should not have been on the power play during Game 5

Ovy did not look well on the ice tonight. He looked pretty slow... I almost think that he shouldn't even be on the power play right now. Because he wasn't, he did not look like he was moving around like the Ovy that we saw in the regular season.

Caleb Williams has good judgment for realizing the previous Bears coaching staff were 'morons'

I was wrong for thinking that Caleb Williams always wanted to be a bear, but I was right that Caleb Williams is the guy because he knew better than anyone that Shane Waldron and Matt Eberflus were fucking morons. Like he has good judgment.

Anthony Edwards will score 50 points in a game during the Western Conference Finals

I'm gonna say it right now. 50 Burger coming for Anthony Edwards in this series [WCF]. Feels I'm excited.

The NBA Draft Lottery is rigged despite the league's attempts to prove otherwise

I think the media is now welcome at the draft lottery because he used to see it behind the scenes... he was laying it on thick. He was doing a lot of unrigable talk... if it was rigged, this is exactly how they would've rigged it. Exactly how they'd rig it. Exactly... you can pick and choose Max... that shit's fucking rigged and I fucking hate it and there should be an investigation.

LeBron James will opt out of his contract and finish his career in Cleveland

I'll say this PFT, LeBron, he's gonna opt out. He's gonna opt out. Could he, could he end his career in Cleveland? Could he fix everything? Well, no, he, he might opt out to take less money, but that would be fun if he did the opt out And we had like a day or two of being like, calves coming home one last time.

The Mavericks will trade the #1 pick for Giannis Antetokounmpo

The Giannis thing is interesting because Giannis did say that he wants to play in a state with no income tax reportedly. And would that, I I think they, the Bucks would absolutely do that trade right? Yeah, in a heartbeat... if you're the Bucks and you're like, Hey, we're not gonna win with Giannis, but we can get Cooper Flagg and reset everything. And the Mavs would be an immediate with Giannis.

Jordan Hudson has appointed herself as Bill Belichick's agent and media manager

It turned out that she had appointed herself Bill Belichick's agent and was the one negotiating with Ben Affleck and Matt Damon... She was the one, or at least she had a very controlling interest in saying, we can't do North Carolina because we're doing that for something else... she was CC'd on every single email at Carolina by Belichick's request.

Running a marathon in six hours does not count as finishing a marathon

People do run marathons in like six hours and then they, and they, and then they post on Instagram... No you didn't. Six hour marathon is not doing it.

There are only four true superstars in the NBA: Jokic, Giannis, Luka, and the aging veterans

I have like four superstars in the whole league... so it's Jokic, it's Giannis, it's Luka, and then it's, there's like the aging group of superstars that's like Steph, LeBron, KD. It's not much. I don't go Superstar to me is if you said their name like to your mom or someone on the street, they would immediately be like, yeah, of course I know who that is.

I gave my NBA MVP vote to Shai Gilgeous-Alexander

I actually voted for Shai. And it was a very, very, very hard vote... The Thunder had 18 more wins than the Nuggets. Right. At some point I don't always vote for the guy who's the highest in the standings, but at some point that matters. Right.

Aaron Rodgers will sign with the Steelers on May 15th

They're waiting. Aaron Rogers is a quarterback for the Pittsburgh Steelers... he's just waiting for the schedule to come out. Then he will sign with the Steelers and make it official... I think we're gonna get Aaron Rogers on the Steelers on May 15th.

The Celtics will still win their series against the Knicks easily

I do think the Celtics are gonna win this series easily... 4-2 is pretty easy. When you're looking back on the history books, 4-2 is pretty easy. That's easily.

The Knicks have 1986 Mets magic to beat Boston

Very reminiscent of the 86 Mets. And how they, and how they beat the Boston Red Sox. It really is reminiscent of that. A New York team just rising from the ashes, like a phoenix to destroy Austin sports. It is, it was so much fun.

Caleb Williams being seen with supermodels makes him a QB1 over Jaden Daniels

Caleb Williams was in Miami and he got out of a car at a restaurant with three different like supermodels. Hell yeah. That's that's that's a QB one you want. Yeah. That's QB one actually. That's Aura. Not a helicopter mom. 24-year-old.

James Harden is the biggest choker in NBA history

Is he the biggest choker? I don't know if it's choker or just Bright lights scares him away guy of all time because at this point it is now four different teams that he's done this with. It is, he's great in the regular season. He can be great in the beginning of a series... But then when the Bright, the lights get the brightest and it's game seven, he's a complete no show. And it's, it's not even, there's not even a debate anymore. I think he is [number one all time].

James Harden stops playing in big games because he simply doesn't want to work anymore

I don't think it's necessarily even an insult to say that to him. Because I, I actually believe that James Harden is like, I don't wanna work anymore. I'm, I'm gonna get paid essentially the same if I, if I get eliminated now or if I get eliminated in two weeks... He doesn't really have any upside besides the glory of winning, which I don't think he necessarily cares that much about.

I wouldn't be worried about the Knicks even if the Celtics go down 0-2

Not worried about the Knicks. Even if we lose, I'll say it right now. If somehow we lose game one, we could lose two games and I wouldn't be worried. [Down 0-2?] Still not worried. I'll say it.

Abdul Carter is a loser for trying to take legendary Giants players' retired numbers

Is Abdul Carter a loser? I it's very weird. A weird tumble guy of all time... to on day one, go into your new company and be like, I want the numbers of the two most famous guys that everybody loves. Right. And, and again, the first one I get it, take your, shoot your shot. The second one... it's weird. He can't go his own way.

Carolina cannot win the Cup because Sebastian Aho is not a true superstar

Carolina fans are kind of all always all over biz. And I, and I gave them a bunch of props... and all those fans tell me aho aho I'm like, I love aho. But I just, he's like one little notch beneath like the true superstars. And, and so I don't, I don't even think if Carolina gets by Washington, like they can win the cup.

The Celtics will sweep the Knicks

I think it's a sweep. I think you guys [Celtics] got 'em. Sweep, easy.

This is likely the last time Giannis Antetokounmpo will be seen in a Bucks jersey

The Bucks maybe if you're a Bucks fan, this is the last time you see Giannis in a Bucks jersey, which sucks... I feel like it's a foregone conclusion he is gone... This is the perfect exit point for him.

Tobias Harris is a pussy

Tobias Harris is a pussy. The amount of people that are pussies that can't play in Philadelphia is disgusting.

Joe Flacco will start Week 1 for the Cleveland Browns over Deshaun Watson and Dylan Gabriel

I think that [Joe] Flacco might start week one. And Flacco is an big underdog to do that too. I think he was like, plus seven 50 last I checked. Yeah. So I, I like the quarterback room.

The Lakers vs. Timberwolves series is going seven games because Adam Silver wants LeBron's numbers

I think that this is gonna go to the distance though... I think that this is an Adam Silver situation. Oh, interest LeBron game seven numbers. If it goes seven, that means that LeBron is still the face of the league.

Xavier Restrepo will be the #3 receiver for the Titans and record 60 catches as an undrafted rookie

I watched a lot of Miami. I don't understand [how he didn't get drafted]... That guy makes a play every single time they throw it to him... Isaiah [Xavier] Restrepo is gonna be like the number three receiver and he'll have 60 catches and he'll be a great NFL player.

Season 1 Tony Soprano is the hottest man who has ever lived

Season one Tony [Soprano] is the hottest man ever that's ever lived, dude. Like the, and that's all I want. The girls who wanted to fuck him, that's who I want to fuck me. That's how I live my life.

Travis Hunter is a sport-changing player who will alter the trajectory of the game

There are players you can target and acquire who will alter the trajectory of a game. There are players that you can target and acquire that alter the trajectory of a football team. There are very few, and it's rare to be able to target and prioritize a player who can alter the sport itself. This is a sport-changing player. So the game will never be the same.

The Browns should take Shedeur Sanders in the second round to start their rebuilding process

In the second round, use one of these picks. Get Shedeur [Sanders]. Shedeur is gonna be extra pissed at the Steelers. They could still take Shedeur. They could take... That's what I'm going with here, Big Cat.