Takes

Gus Bradley will be fired by the time this podcast airs

I want to quickly talk about Gus Bradley. Because by the time this podcast airs, I'm guessing he's going to be fired. This is a situation where they might not let him back on the plane.

Coach O is a 'wild dandelion spore' with no relation to any coaching tree

I don't think that Coach O is a member of any tree. Coach O is a wild dandelion spore that just grows in the wild on his own. He has no relation to Pete Carroll.

NBA players don't start playing real defense until March

Oh, playing defense? Oof, gosh, what, March? I think when the tournament starts and then everybody's like, wow, they play so hard, that's when we're like, okay, now we've got to step it up.

I love playing in Los Angeles and have not thought about free agency yet

I haven't even thought about it [hometown homecoming]. There's so much basketball left to play. And my main focus is this season. And my main focus is this team because I've loved my time here [in L.A.]. And this is the best.

Paul Pierce was just being honest when he criticized Kevin Durant

It's not like Paul's just out there talking about Kevin Durant. Like people are asking him questions and he's answering them honestly... you don't really go at Paul because, you know, he's just answering a question that he was asked.

NBA players are just as tough as hockey players

I think it's also that people try to, like, go at NBA players like we're soft, but we're just as tough [as hockey players].

The 76ers should sit Ben Simmons for his entire rookie year

Honestly, I feel like they're not going to want to rush it. Like why would you rush back a number one pick and risk him getting hurt again? So why not just sit him out the whole year?

I don't wash my apples because tap water builds immunity

I can't say that I do [wash apples], no. I subscribe to the thought that if you drink tap water, you're just building up immunity to germs.

Joe Paterno is 'looking up' proud of the Penn State Nittany Lions

Somewhere, somewhere, Joe Paterno is looking up so proud of his former team, the Penn State Nittany Lions.

It's not time to hit the panic button on the Warriors yet

I said that it was going to take some time for chemistry to develop. Only one ball between the whole team. So I'd say that it's not time to hit the panic button yet, but we're getting close.

The Jaguars Color Rush uniforms are ugly as hell

This is what Blake [Bortles] said about his color rush... 'I think they're ugly as hell.'... Just because you're wearing boiled piss colored jerseys doesn't mean that you need to say it out in public.

Twitter announced the death of Vine just to get PR and check its importance

It seems like something that a company that was maybe down... they need a little press. What better way to press than announce a death?... they're like, if enough people object to us closing down Vine, then we'll keep it around.

The Cubs are in trouble in the World Series because they got shut out in Game 1 and Andrew Miller is a beast

I think you guys are in trouble. I thought if you guys could at least hit, get a couple runs, keep the momentum going of your bats, then even if you lost, you'd be in a good spot. But the fact that you got shut out, it's not good... And the Miller thing, I don't agree with, because I think he could throw every day.

The Houston Rockets will win over 44 games because Mike D'Antoni is moving James Harden to point guard

Hank, give me Houston's number. I'm going to take the over regardless of what it is. 44. Mike D'Antoni's first year, and they got rid of Dwight Howard, and they're moving James Harden to the point. That team's going to score like 120 points a game.

The Brooklyn Nets will win over 20.5 games because they are the type of team that will surprise people

Oh, like the Nets, 20 and a half... Over... They're the exact type of team that's going to surprise people.

The Clippers will win over 53.5 games because it is a contract year for Blake Griffin

I'm going to go with the Clippers over. Really? 53 and a half. Blake Griffin... he said that he's healthy and chomping at the bit. A little insider information for you. It's a contract year, too. I think they're going to be ready to go.

The Memphis Grizzlies will win over their projected win total because Marc Gasol is back and shooting threes

I'm going to stick with the Grizzlies. I'm going to hit their over. Last year, they started something crazy like 60 different starting lineups because of all the injuries they had. They get [Marc] Gasol back. He's going to be shooting threes this year. So they'll finally have one person who can shoot threes.

The Memphis Grizzlies will lose in six games in the first round of the playoffs

I have a prediction for the Grizzlies. They're going to play really good defense and lose in six games in the first round.

The Chicago Bulls will win under 38.5 games because Dwyane Wade and Rajon Rondo will get injured

Chicago Bulls under. I think they're going to be terrible even with their full healthy team. I think there's a chance Rondo and Dwyane Wade are going to get hurt.

The Lakers will win over 24.5 games and make the playoffs

I'm going to stick with the L.A. Lakers. Over. I'm going to tease my own show. I got the Lakers in the playoffs this year... Byron Scott out, Kobe Bryant out. Like, Roy Hibbert, out. This team can only go up. That's like 25 wins unto itself.

The Cleveland Cavaliers will win under their projected win total because LeBron James will coast and take weeks off

Cavs under. You know they came out hard at the gates, but once they get like five, ten games in, LeBron just coasts, maybe takes a couple weeks off with a fake injury. They're not going to be too worried until the playoffs start.

The Celtics will win under 52.5 games because expectations are too high

I'm taking the under on the Celtics. 52.5 feels like too much. It feels like they're going to be a fine team, but it feels more like a 48-49 win team.

Arian Foster retired because he is an atheist and quit football on a Monday

My hot seat is atheism... Arian Foster quit last night. He's an atheist. Straight up quit. People don't talk about him being an atheist, but he quit football. Nice of an atheist to give up on a Monday instead of giving up on Sundays for the change.

The take that the NFL 'sucks' right now is becoming too mainstream and annoying

My hot seat: People who say the NFL sucks. I'm done with it. We were kind of early to it... Now it's become a little too mainstream. People saying the Seahawks-Cardinals game sucked. That game was amazing... I still love the NFL. I'm sick of it. I'm back on Roger Goodell's side.

Dwight Howard will become lovable again during his time in Atlanta

I think Dwight Howard's going to get lovable again. I think he's going to be like the guy he was in Orlando. I think he's going to be chill. I think the Atlanta fans don't expect him to lead them to a title. So I think everyone's kind of on the same lily pad right now.

LeBron James is indestructible because he is using steroids

Well, if they somehow outlaw steroids in the next few months, LeBron... I mean, that's exactly what steroids would do, I think. When everyone's kind of out of gas and you have that extra gear... The hoop looks three times bigger when you're juicing.

The Golden State Warriors will stumble in December before turning it on after the All-Star break

I'm on the record. I think they're going to stumble out of the gate. They're going to have a hard December. And then they're going to turn it on after the All-Star break.

Jimmy Butler is not a top 20 player in the NBA

PFT has a hot take that Jimmy Butler is not a top 20 player in the NBA. [PFT]: No.

There will be no more national anthem protests in the NBA this season

I don't think we're going to see any. We've seen some like link to arms... but their sort of take is, great, Colin Kaepernick, they're pretty supportive of what he did as a group... but they need to do our own thing. And they've been trying to find sort of actual, you know, whether it's town halls... doing things like that that they think can make a real world impact.

James Harden will win the NBA MVP because he doesn't have to play defense

I'm taking James Harden because of the Mikey D thing. He's just like, James, don't worry about defense. Which, like, James Harden doesn't worry about defense anyway... I think if you eliminate that 5% of his brain that worries about defense, his offensive numbers are going to be so crazy.

Brock Osweiler should donate $25,000 to charity for every interception he throws

My other piece of advice would be... He's got a lot of money. Start a charity where every time he throws an interception, he donates like $25,000 to a charity. And then people can't get mad at him for interceptions. Or else you're basically killing children.

Kyle Schwarber used steroids to recover from his ACL injury in six months

Kyle Schwarber... Been doing a little literature research... I was reading an interview with a doctor from April. He said there's very, very, very, very little chance he comes back. He would need a superhuman recovery to make it back for the World Series... Literature research says Kyle Schwarber's on steroids.

The Cubs celebration for winning the NL pennant was maybe a little too much

I actually do think that the celebration was maybe a little too much, to be honest. I feel like, I mean, it was an unbelievable night, a night I'll never forget, but there definitely was a feeling like this is the greatest moment when still got the World Series to win.

The Chicago Cubs will win the World Series in four or five games

I got to go Cubs. I think it's going to be Cubs too. I think it's going to be four or five games.

The Cleveland Indians will win the World Series and celebrate at Wrigley Field

Man, how heartbreaking would that be if the Indians won in Wrigley Field, huh? And you guys had to watch him celebrate there? God, I hope that doesn't happen. No Cubs, no.

I'm pro-bandwagon; the more the merrier for the Chicago Cubs fan base

The more the merrier. Let them all on. As spokesperson for the Chicago Cubs, Big Cat has just opened up the bandwagon for everybody. Hop on.

I like coaches like Mike Zimmer who tell their offensive linemen they are the specific reason the team lost

I like a coach like that. Most coaches will say, you know, we got to look at the tape. We got to fix what's wrong. Nope. Offensive lineman, you fucking sucked. And I'm going to let you know you are the reason why we lost the game.

NFL coaches only work out to prevent stress-induced heart attacks, not to get in shape

A very football guy move, they're not working out to get in shape. They're just working out so they don't have a heart attack. It's purely to stop the heart attack. Get through the day. Yes. Stress heart attack. Everyone knows you cure a stress heart attack by going on the elliptical for 45 minutes.

The best way to treat a concussion is 'hair of the dog'—getting another minor brain injury to help you get back out there

It goes along my theory. It's kind of the hair of the dog theory. You know how if you're hungover, best thing you can do, have another drink when you wake up. If you get a concussion, best thing to do is give yourself another small minor brain injury to help you just get back out there.

The Cubs will win the World Series in seven games

I'm going to say Cubs in seven. The Indians are tougher than you think, man. They're pretty good. The tough thing with the Indians is if they get a lead on you with Shaw and then obviously Miller can go two innings and Cody Allen. So basically if they get through five innings with a lead, you're in bad shape.

Trevor Bauer's teammates are likely talking behind his back about his drone injury

I think they're more mad than they would lead on. Like they would probably say, Hey man, nothing, no big deal, but then you get the guys behind closed doors that are probably talking a lot of shit about him.

Kyle Schwarber can successfully return and hit home runs in the World Series after six months off

If anybody can do it, it would be [Schwarber] to step back, just to step up after a year off or not even a year, like six months off and be able to hit bombs. It would be him. He will not overthink it. That's impossible.

Clayton Kershaw gets too much hate; people focus on his last bad game and ignore that he pitched on short rest

I get a little defensive. [Kershaw] is like my son. It's like I get defensive when people get on him. I mean, the guy did—he herniated his disc. He came back short rest. He pitched three out of the five games in the first series. He dealt the first game, and then he had a bad last game, and that's all people hang on to.

Chicago will have more arrests than Cleveland if their team wins the World Series

I kind of want to go to Chicago just to see what it would be like. I mean, that's going to be fucking nuts up there. I think Chicago will—we'll take the crown and arrest, probably.

Ryan Fitzpatrick's best PR move is having Geno Smith as his backup

I think he has the best PR 101 built in already, and his backup is Geno Smith. So the second they see the alternative, they're like, okay, Ryan, we forgive you for everything.

October 22nd is the most significant date in Chicago Cubs history

October 22nd, 2016, the Cubs clinched the NLCS. October 22nd, 2011, the Cubs hired Theo Epstein. October 22nd, 1970, the man behind the Billy Goat curse died. October 22nd is a big-time sabermetrics date in Cubs history now.

The 2016 WNBA season was destined to be Candace Parker's year

If you follow the WNBA, you knew this was Candace Parker's season. The Los Angeles Sparks are your WNBA champions.

The Minnesota Lynx are an 'odd-year' dynasty

Are the Lynx still considered a dynasty, or was this their dynasty year because they won in 2011? 13, 15, people forget, odd year Lynx.

The Cubs bats woke up because they started playing 'small ball' like Mike Scioscia

I think that the Cubs won because they finally listened to me and started playing some small ball. It's called foreplay, and Joe Maddon finally figured out you've got to get to first before you get to home plate. And instead of hitting home runs, they finally learned to build a rally with some bunts, some stolen bases. I call it socialism for Mike Scioscia.

There will definitely be a Game 7 in the Cubs-Dodgers NLCS

There's going to be game seven. That's all I'm saying. I want the Cubs to win. I'm on record, but there's going to be game seven.