Takes

Onside kick rules need to be changed because they are currently impossible

They need to change the onside kick. It's impossible. You used to be able to recover an onside kick once every what, 10, 11% of the time. Now nobody does... Change it like the XFL and be like, you have to convert a fourth and 20.

Brock Purdy is on track to be a franchise quarterback

If Brock Purdy was taken with like a top 10 pick... I think we'd be like, Purdy is good showing signs of living up to his draft status... I think he's probably on track to be a franchise quarterback.

The 49ers lose the Super Bowl whenever they beat a team without blue in their logo in the NFC Championship

Anytime they've beaten a non-blue team in the NFC Championship game, they've gone on to lose the Super Bowl... Falcons in 2013 and Packers in 2020. They lost those Super Bowls. [The Lions] are a blue team... but wait, Lions have blue... wait every time the 49ers have won versus a team that has a shade of blue they win... but anytime they've beaten a non-blue team they lose.

The Wisconsin Badgers are going on a miracle run in March

I am all in on the Badgers. They're good... and I'm believing, I'm believing in a miracle March run. I'm usually pretty honest about where my heart is... I'm gonna be unsafe in March. If they keep playing the way they're playing, I'm gonna be emotionally unsafe.

Every Arizona fan is scared to play Wisconsin in the tournament

Every Arizona fan heard you say that and like, Max is the dumbest person ever. He doesn't know ball. Every Arizona fan is scared of Wisconsin. That's a fact... We whooped them twice in the Elite Eight to go to the Final Four.

Joel Embiid ducked Nikola Jokic in Denver

We were robbed of Joel Embiid playing in Denver against Jokic. 15 minutes before the game, he's like, no, I don't wanna play. I wanna duck... He hasn't played in Denver since 2019. He likes to play Jokic at home and then he's an 'out' guy... when they get to Denver, his knee hurts.

Josh Allen's playoff performance against the Chiefs was significantly better than Lamar Jackson's

QB 1 [Allen] 26 for 39, 258 yards, three touchdowns, zero turnovers, 24 points scored... QB 2 [Lamar] 24, 37, 326 yards, one td, two turnovers, 10 points scored... Josh Allen gets a lot of the blame. I think Josh Allen's one of the best quarterbacks in the NFL. He just keeps running into Patrick Mahomes.

Planes are having a moment right now

I think planes are having a moment. They are. You had Top Gun Maverick. You've got [Masters of the Air]. You've got Boeing. You've got that lady that got kicked off for farting on the plane. So a lot of stuff about planes recently.

Adrian Griffin was fired because he failed to make Giannis Antetokounmpo like him

The only reason I don't feel bad for Adrian Griffin... his only job was to make Giannis [Antetokounmpo] like him. And maybe Giannis never gave him a shot. But if you could just get Giannis to like you, you won't get fired.

Jim Harbaugh will lead the Chargers to a Super Bowl within five years

I think Jim Harbaugh will be in a Super Bowl within the next five years with the Chargers. Justin Herbert will look good. They will go deep into the Playoffs and winning cures all.

The Chargers will be a tough team instantly under Jim Harbaugh

If there is one franchise that Jim Harbaugh could change, like how we perceive them, the Chargers, whether it be toughness injuries, like just bad luck, it's Jim Harbaugh. Like he's gonna make them a tough team instantly.

Michigan fans would accept any amount of future sanctions for the 2023 National Title

He just won a national title. He beat Ohio State three years in a row. If you're a Michigan fan, you sign up for that a hundred times out of a hundred. No matter what happens after this. Who cares about sanctions?

Deebo Samuel's presence is the single biggest factor for the 49ers' success

The [49ers] are 12 and 1 straight up when Deebo Samuel starts and finishes the game, they are 1 and 4 when he doesn't. That is way more significant than the rain and how Brock Purdy looked is losing Deebo Samuel. If he's not playing, the Lions are as live as live could be.

The Chiefs will beat the 49ers in the Super Bowl

I just don't know how it happens. I don't know where it happens. But the Chiefs will win again because until I see Mahomes get knocked off his block, he's not losing and they're gonna beat the Niners.

Bill Belichick is the only coach who got a vacation to Antigua during the Falcons' interview process

To my knowledge, I think Belichick is the only one that got the vacation that took 'em to Antigua. That's it. All the other ones have taken place at the Falcons facility. They winded and dined [him] a little bit more.

The Panthers will hire a coach specifically to save Bryce Young

I think they're gonna hire a coach that can work with Bryce Young. I think Charlotte's a cool city to live in... all along, they wanted to go young offensive to get Bryce Young... what [Dave] Canales did with [Baker] Mayfield was tremendous.

Justin Fields could fetch a first or second-round pick in a trade

I think [Justin Fields] could be either a first-round pick or a second-round pick. But if you're talking about a first-round pick, you're talking about a team that needs a quarterback... like the Falcons at the eighth pick.

JJ McCarthy is going to get significant buzz as a top-10 draft pick

I think JJ McCarthy's gonna get a lot of buzz as like, I don't know, here's your, here's your Mac Jones type of like, this guy wins games. He's leader... he climbs... [he could be a] top 10 pick.

Dave Canales will be the coach that saves Bryce Young in Carolina

Canales was not the lead dog in that room... but all along they wanted to go young offensive to get Bryce Young... what Canales did with [Baker] Mayfield was tremendous. I think that's a good fit.

The Ravens-Chiefs AFC Championship game will be a low-scoring defensive struggle

I actually think Chiefs-Ravens is a low scoring game. I think it's in the twenties... like 23-20. I think it's an amazing scene in Baltimore.

A star wide receiver will be traded before the 2024 NFL Draft

I think one of these star wide receivers will be traded. And I'm saying that... when you look across the league, a Diggs and AJ Brown might not be traded, but those type of players... I think we get one of those big veteran trades.

Every January 22nd, all NBA teams should be required to try and break the single-game scoring record in honor of Kobe Bryant's 81-point game

Darren Rovell actually had a great idea that on February or January 22nd, every single year, the day that Kobe dropped 81 on the Raptors, every team should have to try to break the record. I like that idea. That's good.

James Harden will try to score 60 points in his next game to answer Joel Embiid

I'm gonna bet on James Harden in his next game to go out there and try to score like 55, 60 points. Yeah. I feel like he's got something to prove. He's got an answer for it.

Joel Embiid will not win MVP this year because he'll miss too many games

He probably won't be able to win MVP 'cause he's gonna miss too many games this year. He's already missed 11 outta 40... it will be very funny if Joel has like an even better year than last year. But because he plays like 64 games instead of 65, that'll be the quickest that everyone will turn on a rule.

If the Celtics stay healthy, they will win the championship this year

I've said it the whole year. If, if this team is healthy in the Playoffs, they'll win the Championship. Chris Saps has been an amazing addition... Just gotta stay healthy.

The word 'analytics' is used as a placeholder for any number that sports fans dislike

I have a take. And that's, people just use the word, they substitute the word analytics in whenever there's a number that they don't like and they're like, this is analytics.

Analytics have ruined baseball and basketball, but they've made football more exciting

Analytics or you know, advanced statistics, Sabre metrics, all these things has in a way ruined baseball and basketball... Football is the one sport where analytics and advance like metrics has made football significantly more exciting... the nineties football and early 2000 football when it wasn't even a question. If you had a fourth and two, you'd punt. Like, why would you want that?

Bill Belichick to the Buffalo Bills would be a perfect fit

Now it does feel like Belichick is gonna go to the Falcons, but Rex Ryan threw something out yesterday that I kind of, I don't hate Belichick to the bills. It actually, it makes sense. I think it makes for a team that wants to win right now.

I am officially supporting the 49ers over the Lions because the Lions are a division rival

I've reached my limit of pulling even remotely for a division rival. I I'm done, I'm done with the lines. I think I have to just go Niners. 'cause it's just, they're, they're a division rival. I was reaching my limit and I've reached my limit.

Reports from the Philadelphia media about Jalen Hurts being a 'diva' or standoffish are disgusting fabrications

There's been bullshit coming out of the media from the Eagles all year. So it's all a bunch of crap. Everyone knows the Eagles gets clicks right now, so they're making stuff up or they're fabricat—or they're embellishing what is going on in that Eagles locker room and it's disgusting.

Tristan Thompson took cheap steroids intended for physical appearance rather than performance

Tristan Thompson... Got busted for steroids... I went immediately to my number one source of steroids in the world that I know named Billy Football. And he said the craziest thing is that he was taking Broke Boys steroids. Oh. Stuff Frat Boys and Talkers used to bulk up... He was doing it for the look, not for the functionality.

You must always defer the coin toss if you win it

Why would you not defer, why would you not get the ball back to, to start the second half? I just assumed that was like a, a cardinal fundamental rule. And then when you look at the stats... I think you should just defer every time.

I am officially in on the Bears drafting Caleb Williams and trading Justin Fields

The Bears take Caleb Williams. Yes. Number one. I'm in. I'm also officially in. I just wanna say that I'm, I've, I've done a lot of soul searching. I, especially the Mel—Mel's like, oh, we can get a first for Justin Fields. Let's just do it.

Steph Curry belongs in the NBA GOAT conversation (or at least the 'Go-cart')

I put Steph Curry up there. He's in the Go-cart. I'm putting Steph Curry in the GOAT conversation right now.

Lifting weights is significantly more effective for getting in shape than cardio

It's crazy how don don't know when we learned this as like kids what point we're like, oh yeah, to get in shape you gotta run. That's so wrong. Like cardio. Okay, fine... Dude. Lifting weights is the best way to get in shape. 'cause you just feel stronger and you start, your metabolism goes, it feels good.

Josh Allen is not the reason the Bills are losing in the playoffs

I hate the fact that we gotta hear the takes again as if like QB wins is a stat anyways. But on top of it, the teams that he's lost to for the most part in the Playoffs have been the chiefs and, and Joe Burrow... the guy has, he, he is got a hundred rating for his career in the postseason. He has 21 touchdowns for interceptions. He's not the reason they're losing these games.

The Buffalo Bills should fix their problems by moving to the NFC

Move the team to the NFC. Like on like it is dicey with the cap... You bring up a great point and obviously like digs his, his issues down the stretch... But move the team to the NFC.

Justin Madubuike should have been in the Defensive Player of the Year conversation for his performance with the Ravens

Justin Madubuike... that guy should have been in the conversation for defensive player of the year and he's just this kinda like short nondescript defensive tackle that doesn't have a big name and he's just taken it over.

The Kansas City Chiefs play roughly 10-15% better in the playoffs than they do during the regular season

Kansas City has played 10 to 15% better in the Playoffs. Like a lot of teams do. They just figure out ways to turn it on.

Brock Purdy is a fringe top-10 quarterback, not in the elite tier yet

For me to not call Jalen Hurts one of the top five to six quarterbacks in the league, we've gotten so emotional... long story short, I think Purdy deserves a lot of credit. I think he's a fringe top 10 guy wherever you wanna put him on the, you know, on the inside of that top 10. On the outside of the top 10.

Sam LaPorta and George Kittle are currently the two best tight ends in the NFL

LaPorta, you know, with no disrespect to anybody who's been doing it at a high level longer... there's gonna be a discussion over the next couple years of who's the best tight end in the league. And I feel like at this point, like he's in line—to him and Kittle. When you look at the whole package: blocking, receiving.

NFL teams should always hire offensive play-callers as head coaches to ensure continuity

What makes me nervous about defensive head coaches is inevitably when your rookie quarterback or your unproven quarterback has success, you're gonna lose that play caller... I would go with an offensive play caller. 'cause that's what I look around and see.

The Panthers coaching job is the worst opening in the league because David Tepper has made it a toxic situation

Panthers are last. You're, you're already, you've already, you've got this owner who showed his ass and if he's not going anywhere, that's a big part of the conversation... it's incredible to me that somebody could fuck up the viability of the job that you're trying to fill so badly.

Seattle is one of the best head coaching openings in the NFL because of GM John Schneider

I think Seattle's a great job man. I really do... they got a really good GM. That's something people ignore. Having Schneider. That's the situation. Walk into and be like, yeah, that guy can, he can pick 'em.

Having a third child is the moment where you officially have to give up on all your 'fringe' enjoyable activities or time-wasting

The third kid is where you really put some of your fringe enjoyable activities in the casket. You don't realize it, but all the little shit that you used to do to waste time, you just don't waste any more time. There's no more time to waste.

Championship Sunday is a better weekend of football than the Divisional Round

I have a take, I kind like Championship Sunday the most because I like... there's just something special about booking a trip to the Super Bowl. It's like, feels historic. ... you also get that week where like all the fans of the team that booked it, it's like you don't even have to think about the game. You just get to celebrate it.

CJ Stroud had the best rookie season for a quarterback in NFL history

I called it the best rookie year for a QB ever. And it just, you just ran into an absolute buzz saw [in the Ravens]. ... But at least you know that you have hope now. Like this is a, your window is beginning to open.

David Tepper should sue the S2 cognition test people for ruining his operation

I think that David Tepper should sue the S2 people because I am studying for the bar exam and you have to prove that you have financial damages and liability. David Tepper could very easily be like, 'You fucked over my entire operation.'

The S2 cognition test people are trying to cover their asses regarding CJ Stroud

The S2 cognition test or whatever the fuck it's called... they're literally just trying to cover their ass. Like combine seasons coming up. Once CJ Stroud ended up being incredible and Rookie of the Year and all these things, they have to cover their ass some ways. So they're like, 'Haha, just a prank, it was an incorrect test score and it never should have been counted.'

Jim Harbaugh will be the head coach of the Chargers

I feel like this week we're gonna start getting some announcements. Bill Belichick for the Falcons, Harbaugh to the Chargers. Yep. That type of stuff.