Takes

Adam Scott will win the 2024 Open Championship

I'm going to Adam Scott. He played well last week... He's 44 years old finishing in the top 10. Hasn't finished in the top 10 in a major since 2019. But I feel like he's one of those guys... I feel like Adam is playing well.

Jalen Brunson taking a massive pay cut is the coolest move possible for a fan

Pretty much the coolest move you can do if you're a fan of the Knicks. I don't think players, I think players should get what they're worth, but I wouldn't complain if our were Knicks fan right now that he just left 113 million on the table to make his team better and hope and deliver a championship to the Knicks.

England soccer is never going to 'come home'

It's not coming home. Not coming home. It's never gonna come home. It left, it walked out the door. You got empty Nest syndrome. It's not coming back. England soccer is just, it's gotta be brutal to root for.

I mistakenly believed tornadoes do not hit big cities just to make myself feel better

You gotta worry about the tornado—tornadoes don't hit cities though. That's good. Like big cities... False tornadoes can hit anywhere at any time. Okay. I, I just made that up. I completely made it up. Okay. But... That was something I just told myself to make myself feel better.

Dan Campbell would be a successful head coach for the US Men's National Soccer Team

Number four. I think Dan Campbell could do it actually. Absolutely. 'Cause what we need is we need passion out of our players. I think Dan Campbell will figure soccer out.

I will not celebrate a Team USA gold medal if the semi-final or final games are within 10 points

I'm gonna say right now I will not, I'm not okay with just a gold medal. I want domination. I want utter domination... I will not be celebrating a gold medal if we win the semi-finals—if the semi-finals or the finals games are within 10 points. Either of them. I will not be celebrating this gold medal.

I want to see the US Men's Basketball team dominate the Olympics like the 1992 Dream Team

I want to see domination. Like the original dream team. That's the statement. Where you don't use a timeout at all. Just mow them down.

Offsides should be removed from soccer

Offsides should be taken out of soccer. There should be no offsides.

MVP Baseball 2005 is the greatest baseball game ever created

MVP Baseball 2005 was the greatest baseball player—was MVP Baseball? Yeah. The greatest baseball game. I think '04 as well was very good... those two versions were so, so elite.

My brief stint with the Rams saved my NFL career

Going to LA just for that like last five games of the year was so unbelievable for me. Like getting a fresh start... it brought the fun back and like, that's when I'm having fun, talking trash, enjoying it. Like that's when I'm at my best and yeah. I, I needed that.

Mike Evans is a top 5 receiver of all time if he plays a few more years

If he plays three, four more years the way he's been playing, he's a top five receiver of all time. No he is... he's had 10 seasons in a row of a thousand yards. And he's the consistent one. Right. And like he doesn't get that recognition.

I saw a bright circle UFO in Austin, Texas

Literally like, we got the, the screen on the car's real bright... Emily's in the passenger seat. She's looking at her phone, this like, like circle shape object. Like bright as hell. Literally just goes from right here and goes straight down. She was looking at her phone... it was so bright that she looked up and saw it too and it just like disappeared. Like completely disappeared.

Adam Schefter is one of the few media members you can actually trust with off-the-record information

Adam and I actually are close... he's one of the media members you can actually trust that if it's off the record, it's not going anywhere. Like he actually will keep it close to the vest.

USA soccer is back and will win a World Cup now that Gregg Berhalter is fired

Greg Berhalter has been fired yet again. We did it guys. Congratulations. USA soccer is back on the map. We're so back now. We're gonna win a World Cup.

The USMNT will never be great until the players care enough to fight fans in the stands

The United States will never be great at soccer until our players care enough to go into the stands and fight people from other countries. It just means more. That somehow a Malice at the Palace situation... these guys just fucking care about soccer.

Nike is likely behind Jaylen Brown and Kyrie Irving being left off Team USA

And I do think there is probably some truth to the Nike thing where Kyrie is also, you know, if [Jaylen Brown's] a snub, Kyrie's a snub... They're both very outspoken against Nike. Coincidence? Probably not.

Kyrie Irving and Jaylen Brown are clearly better basketball players than Derrick White

Obviously Derrick White's a great player... but if we're talking on pure talent, Kyrie and [Jaylen Brown] are better than Derrick White.

The EA Sports College Football 25 release will change how everyone deals with the summer

Ea Sports College football's out [next week]... It's the most anticipated video game I think release ever. It's gonna change how summer's dealt with.

The Pirates should have let Paul Skenes try to finish his no-hitter despite the pitch count

Paul Skeens threw a no hitter through seven innings... 99 [pitches]. Took him out before he got to a hundred. I get it. But also, fuck that... put 'em out there for the eighth inning. See if he can get out of it in 10 pitches.

Taking $30,000 is better than playing one week in the MLB

Would you rather get handed 30 K right now or play a week in the big leagues? 30 k all day... If you put me on an MLB team for a week, I think it'd be the most miserable week of your life. Every single play just being a disaster for you.

It is almost impossible to get a bad version of a BLT

I'll go with BLT. Classic. Never fails. Some of these sandwiches, you can get bad versions of them. It's almost impossible to get a bad version of A BLT.

A Chicken Club sandwich is much better than a Turkey Club

I'm gonna go with chicken club. Much better than a Turkey club. Oh, much better.

The Banh Mi is the best sandwich in the world

I'm gonna go with it Bon me [Banh Mi] the Vietnamese sandwich. It's so, fuck. I, I think it's rated as like the best sandwich in the world. I read that a couple places... It's awesome. Yeah. It's, I would say it's worthy of a first round grade.

Pimento cheese is an overrated sandwich filling

I think pimento cheese is overrated... The problem with pimento cheese is there's absolutely no crunch or hard factor in there. It's just soft. Just soft.

Josh Allen will finish in the 30s at the American Century Championship

I think I gave you [Josh Allen] in the thirties. [Josh: That means I'm probably shooting anywhere from 75 to 80 all three days.]

I would retire from football if it guaranteed the Bills a Super Bowl win

If that's what it took, I would do it. [Big Cat: You guarantee it?] I would do it. I feel like I would have a part whether I played or not.

I do not want a championship ring from the 2024 Boston Celtics

I greatly appreciate that sentiment, but I am truly so happy for those guys and you know, they deserved it. And again, did your part though... but I don't want the ring. I think that that equals no ring.

The new Big 12 will be very fun despite losing Oklahoma and Texas

I think the new Big 12 is gonna be very, very fun. Yes. And I'm also very excited because no one ever talks about... Arizona and Kansas playing Big 12 basketball is gonna rule. [They've] had some good runs, but losing Oklahoma and Texas does not help.

Kevin Durant is unhappy and wants to be traded

Kevin Durant is unhappy and request a trade... I think he will. Oh, he will. I think Kevin Durant is unhappy. We, we've been talking to some league sources.

Cooper Flagg is going to be a massive problem in the NBA

Cooper Flagg is he might be a problem... the tanking this year is gonna be off the charts. Off the charts. Yeah. As it should be. Yeah. It's gonna rule. I'm gonna say it right now. He's good.

Brandon Aiyuk wants to leave the 49ers

I think Brandon Aiyuk wants to leave the 49ers. The fact that he keeps talking about wanting to leave the 49ers... He posted a screenshot of him watching Commanders film, which concerns me a little bit.

Donald Trump would beat Joe Biden in a golf match even while giving him 20 strokes

Trump made a million dollar wager in a 18 hole golf match and he's gonna give him 20 strokes... like if Joe Biden doesn't accept Hot Seat. No, but like if he does accept, he's gonna get smoked.

Keegan Bradley being named Ryder Cup captain is an intentional 'make good' for his 2023 snub

It does feel like a make good, but it's, I mean, he's a great dude and he's gonna be a good captain. I just want him to be as petty as possible and like, maybe even call Zach Johnson and be like, 'Hey, you've made the Ryder Cup team, we need you on the team.' And then him be like, 'Really? That's awesome.' Like psych you bro.

The Marshawn Lynch and Gavin Newsom podcast marks the top of the podcast bubble

Marshawn Lynch, Gavin Newsom and Doug whatever, Doug... Having a podcast together is the very sign that the podcast bubble is about to burst.

Dak Prescott is only wearing a walking boot as a precaution to avoid getting into vacation fights

Maybe Dak Prescott is wearing the walking boot because in the past he has gone on vacations and got his ass beat. So if he puts on the walking boot, it's kind of a like, 'Hey, I'm not here to fight guy.' You're not gonna hit a guy who's handicapped... it's a precautionary 'don't want to get my ass beat like I did on spring break'.

One bagel is never satisfying; a backup bagel is essential for breakfast

One and a half bagels is usually the perfect amount... One bagel is never fully satisfying. A backup bagel is the most important. What about bacon, egg and cheese. Great. You need to finish it off with something. Keep it off with a bagel.

I sometimes order backup sandwiches at Jimmy John's

Sometimes I'll do backup sandwiches... like if you want to try two different things. I'll get like a buffalo chicken sandwich and a cheesesteak... I always get a backup sandwich. You can put that in the fridge.

I have zero chance of winning the American Century Championship this year

I have zero chance of winning. Okay. In this... I've come this year with zero expectations. You know, I had a shoulder replacement in December, so I'm just getting that back... it's not pretty.

Andy Pettitte is the best big-game pitcher I have ever seen

Andy Pettitte's probably the best big game pitcher I've ever seen, you know, in my career. He just, that guy just, he knew how to win.

I wish I had used steroids during my MLB career

I look back now, I go, fuck, I wish I would've done 'em. Yeah. To be honest with you. I wish I would've because I, I don't think I would've, I I think I would've gained velocity. You know, I, I, I think in that aspect, so with my ability to throw strikes, I think it would've made me a lot better.

MLB Commissioner Rob Manfred hates baseball and should have been fired years ago

Rob Manfred. I just, I think he hates baseball. So he's just screwing it up while his tenure's still going. And he's gonna see how much he could fuck it up... They should have booted him years ago.

MLB should fire all analytic guys and get rid of the pitch clock because a computer has no heartbeat

I would get rid of the clock. I'd get every analytic guy outta there. All the nerds. Drop 'em off in the middle of the lake and let 'em swim in. A computer doesn't tell you, it doesn't have a heartbeat... now these kids nowadays, they don't have to think for themselves.

Adam Thielen is a sleeper to win the celebrity golf tournament

Adam Thielen and he's, he's a sleeper to win this. I, on on the 10th hole today, he hit, he hit a little iron and he hit about 300 down the middle. I went, oh boy.

I would kill Hitler if I was on the 1936 Olympic team

I think I would wanna be Jesse Owens and just win gold medal Right. in Hitler's face... And I would kill Hitler while I was there. Kill Hitler.

Baseball has the highest amount of celebratory ass slaps in sports

Baseball for sure. Football probably second... baseball, that's how they shake hands.

Bronny James should be required to use 'LeBron James Jr.' in the box score instead of 'B. James'

I really don't like the fact that [Bronny] is going by Bronny. Why not? His name's LeBron James Jr. Just go LeBron James Jr. I don't like calling like it's even in the box score. It's B James. Yeah. I don't like that, bro. I agree with you. The name is LeBron James Jr.

DeMar DeRozan is the 'working man's Steph Curry'

DeMar DeRozan is the working man Steph Curry. [He does it] old fashioned [with twos not threes].

Baseball players are secretly happy when they get snubbed from the All-Star game

If I'm a baseball player and I get snubbed for the All-Star game, I'm secretly excited about it because at least you get to go have like three days where you don't have to work.

Pete Alonso is the biggest loser in sports when the Home Run Derby comes around

Pete Alonso with the home run Derby is the worst. He is the biggest loser in sports when the Home Run Derby comes around. ... He, dude, he gets laser focused.

Taxes are optional in Greece

In Greece, taxes are optional. And then their economy just crumbles every like 10, 15 years. They're like, Hey, we should probably start paying taxes. ... I looked, I just, I just Googled that. Yes. Currently more than half of Greek households are exempt from any personal income tax.