PMT DB
PMT DB
Barry Sanders, David Justice, and Big Cat’s Barber Shop Incident
Big Cat opened the show with a level of vulnerability that most men wouldn't share with their own priest, let alone a global audience. While driving to a haircut on a Friday afternoon, a sneeze-fart-poop trifecta left him in a situation where he had to walk into the barber shop with spare sweatpants and leave his dignity (and his shorts) in the trash can.
Big CatI am going to make pooping your pants as an adult socially acceptable
None of it comes even close to what I'm trying to accomplish when it comes to making pooping your pants as an adult not something to be ashamed of. I'm a 31-year-old man. I make mistakes just like you... If this happens to you, don't be ashamed. I'm here for you. I want to give a voice to the voiceless, the grown adults out there.
The conversation shifted to Argentina’s devastating loss in the Copa América final. Lionel Messi’s decision to retire from international play sparked a massive debate about his legacy and his apparent inability to close out the big one. PFT had a few theories about why the greatest player in the world keeps coming up short on the biggest stage.
PFT CommenterLionel Messi lacks the clutch gene and is likely a relative of Nazi Josef Mengele
I think that Messi might be a relative of a Nazi because a lot of them went to Argentina after the war to try to escape. Now, there was a doctor [Josef Mengele]... He was unable to uncover the clutch gene and isolate it. And that's why, you know, like Hitler, if he had had the clutch gene, he probably wouldn't have choked... Mingel moved to South America, had sex with an Argentinian. A few years later you get [Messi].
With Messi feeling the heat from his home country, Big Cat suggested a career move that has worked for other legends who were labeled as quitters. If you want to fix a reputation of choking, there is one city that currently offers the ultimate redemption arc.
Big CatLionel Messi should go to Cleveland and win a championship to repair his legacy
When the whole world thinks you're a quitter and is down on you, you go to Cleveland and you win a championship.
PFT CommenterUnder Armour signed Lionel Messi because they specialize in signing the biggest chokers in sports
Congratulations to Under Armour for apparently signing Lionel Messi to round out their stable of Spieth, Cam Newton, and Steph Curry, the biggest chokers in the world.
Barry Sanders and David Justice
Barry Sanders joined the show and proved he is still the humblest guy to ever play the game. Even with 34 NCAA records to his name, he wasn’t interested in bragging, though he did confirm that he hasn't lost all of his athleticism since retiring in 1998.
Barry SandersI can probably still dunk on a 10-foot goal
[Can you still dunk?] You mean on a 10-foot goal? Yes. Probably not... Yeah, I mean, yeah I could. I could.
David Justice also sat down to talk about his career across several massive baseball markets. He gave a lot of love to Cleveland for their fanaticism despite the weather, but he saved his highest praise for the legendary owner he played for in New York.
David JusticeGeorge Steinbrenner was the greatest owner in sports history
Best owner ever. I had the utmost respect because I don't think I've ever seen an owner that wants to win as much as George Steinbrenner wanted to win. Like, literally, we played 162 games. I really think that he wanted us to win 162 games, like not one loss.
Things got a little dicey when Big Cat followed PFT and Hank’s advice to bring up Halle Berry. The look on David Justice's face didn't quite translate to audio, but the awkwardness certainly did. Before that though, David shared his admiration for how Derek Jeter managed to navigate the New York media landscape without a single scratch on his reputation.
PFT CommenterDerek Jeter did the best job of keeping his private life out of the tabloids while playing in New York
It's actually unbelievable when you think about it how long [Jeter] played in New York and there never was any story... Ain't nobody done it better than him.
Not Afraid to Go There
The guys highlighted the incredible bravery (or lack of a filter) shown by Tarvaris Jackson’s wife. In a terrifying situation where a gun was pointed at her, she chose to deliver a scouting report that most defensive coordinators would be too scared to say to Jackson's face.
PFT CommenterTarvaris Jackson's wife is a Hall of Famer for mocking his on-field accuracy while he was holding a gun
Jax and his wife said to him [while he pointed a gun at her], you better be accurate because you ain't accurate on the field. That's so quick... she actually is facing death and she's still not afraid to go there. Not afraid to go there Hall of Fame.
PFT CommenterTarvaris Jackson was a D-grade draft pick for the Vikings
Can we retroactively go back and grade Brad Childress' draft when he selected Tarvaris in the second round? Because in light of yesterday's events, I'd like to change my grade to a D. I think Tarvaris was a D-grade draft.
This led to a discussion about coaches who just don't look the part. Big Cat and PFT are offering a new service where NFL owners can send them a photo of a potential hire to see if they look like a guy who belongs in a locker room or a guy who belongs in a locker.
Big CatBrad Childress and Joe Philbin don't look like real football coaches
Brad Childress is definitely in that camp where it's like that guy is not really a football coach, right? Mark Trestman is the same way. You look at him and you're like, come on, bad idea... Joe Philbin just because he's a classic case of looking like a loser.
Hurt or Injured: The EU
In a rare move outside the sports world, the guys analyzed the Brexit situation. While the UK is hitting the exit, PFT thinks the European Union is going to treat this like a bad breakup and come back stronger than ever.
PFT CommenterThe European Union is hurt, not injured, following Brexit and will make a major comeback
The EU, in my opinion, is hurt. I don't think that they're injured. This is a minor setback for a major comeback... The EU is going to get back on that horse. They're going to bring in like Turkey and Russia and really get Britain's attention and Britain will be like, yeah, we fucked up. I'm sorry. Can I have you back? Things will get back together.
PFT CommenterAmerica should join the EU as a senior prank by Barack Obama
This would be a boss move. If on his last day in office, Barack Obama just said, like, hey, guess what? USA, we just joined the EU... Spot opened up, we're in the EU.
To wrap things up, the guys debuted "Hey JJ," a segment dedicated to finding the problematic side of everything JJ Watt does. After he ate a raw egg on Jimmy Fallon, the guys realized that the "hardest worker in the room" might actually be supporting some very dark industries.
PFT CommenterJJ Watt eating a raw egg on Jimmy Fallon is condoning mass murder and sweatshops
Each egg is actually like a chicken abortion. So like you're basically condoning mass murder when you eat that egg... eggs are produced in unsanitary hen houses. So they're basically sweatshops for chickens. So that's not cool.
Between the 3:00 AM recording time and PFT's voice sounding like he swallowed a gravel pit, this episode was a true test of grit for everyone involved.
Go follow the Twitter account so Big Cat has to post the shorts.
