Takes

The $1.2 billion valuation of the Enhanced Games is a fake number.

The enhanced games just got valued at $1.2 billion. And the enhanced games... are the steroid users alternative to the Olympics. It's being run by Peter Thiel. It sounds like it's a fake valuation because it just sounds good to say $1.2 billion.

Inhaled 'Protein Hookah' will revolutionize bro culture

A doctor claims that inhaled protein enters the bloodstream faster and absorb more efficiently. It's kinda like weed. All I'm saying is like keep your eye on this technology. Because it has the opportunity to revolutionize bro culture.

If Tiger makes the cut at Augusta a week after his DUI arrest, it would be the most impressive sports story in the last 10 years

What if he played well? How would the announcers talk about it? I think they'd immediately jump to like what a redemption story this is. Tiger making the cut out of Augusta after getting arrested for DUI seven days before — is this the most impressive sports story that we've had in the last 10 years?

I am against prenups because marriage should be forever

I'm against prenups. Because if you're getting married, you're never—you're getting married to be together forever. If you really love someone, the money shouldn't matter.

Team USA would have lost the gold medal game if they listened to Aaron Judge's speech

That was one of the worst speeches of all time. If they're, why don't put that out. If you're world ba baseball classic, don't put that out. I think they're trying to get a little bit of the buzz from the Olympics team. USA would've lost the gold medal game if, if if someone stood up and gave Aaron Judge's speech.

Rams fans should be worried because Puka Nacua is focused on everything but football right now

My Hot Seat this week is gonna be Rams fans. ... Puka might be focused on everything but football right now. He's on an elite bachelor run. ... I just feel when you're on this kind of heater, I think it, it's gonna transcend and he, this is gonna bleed into the regular season football.

The Bears, Saints, or Chiefs will win the Super Bowl next year

The Chiefs, the Bears and the Saints because since 2020 the only Super Bowl winners have been the Chiefs or NFC teams getting their second Super Bowl in franchise history. So that leaves us the Chiefs, the Bears or the Saints for next year. So I like that. I like my chances there.

Daily ice cream consumption can reduce diabetes risk by 50%

Ice cream might save the planet. The healthy fats in ice cream can protect you against so many things... 50% reduction in diabetes [from] one serving a day. I believe it.

The LIV Dam is about to break with Brooks Koepka's return to the PGA

Brooks is back. ... If one of [Bryson DeChambeau, Jon Rahm, or Cam Smith] flips, that's a second massive domino that it will be tough to come back from. ... The damn could break.

LeBron James will announce his retirement at the All-Star Game

He's gonna announce he's retiring at the All-Star game. They're gonna rig it so that he can win the all-star MVP. It's in LA. And then he's gonna say, I'm retiring.

It is hypocritical for LeBron James to complain about playing on Christmas after doing it for 20 years

LeBron's been playing on Christmas for 20 years. Like, what are you talking about? Now, you're upset? I should [mention] though... Christmas Day [games] are ruined now because they don't play defense in the league.

Bobby Petrino is a man of character who will clean up the North Carolina locker room as offensive coordinator

Bobby Petrino is going to be their new offense coordinator for next season. And I think that's a great hire. This is fun that Bobby Petrino, a man of character can get in, clean up that locker room and, and really change it from being a circus into a, a run of the mill workman like professional football organization.

JMU isn't like Liberty; they will be competitive in the playoff

We're not fucking Liberty, dude. We have sex at James Madison University. It's encouraged, it's mandatory. ... If one of those teams keeps it competitive, they might not change the format too much.

Miami deserved a spot in the College Football Playoff over Notre Dame

You can't eliminate the fact that the games need to matter. It's why we said that Miami should be in over Notre Dame. It's why that if you win games, you should have a seat at the table.

The 'Haters' were right about Jayden Daniels being injury prone

The haters were right. Congratulations. Jayden's shut down for the season. RG4, injury prone, made out of glass. ... Haters were right. Can't say anything to the haters. Focus on next year.

Ed Orgeron will return to LSU as part of Lane Kiffin's new coaching staff

I think there's a high chance that he [Kiffin] puts Coach O on his staff... Why wouldn't you want Coach O on the LSU staff? You want him back.

LSU is Lane Kiffin's forever home and he will never leave the program

I don't think Lane Kiffin would ever leave. This is the one destination for him.

Mike Tomlin and the Steelers are likely to break up after this season

My Hot Seat is Mike Tomlin and the Steelers. Because I actually think that he might, this might be it... they don't change anything. And it's, I mean, TJ Watt said it. I think the bills ran the same play 27 times on Sunday. Yeah. That's insane. It feels like this is finally [the end].

Billionaires who don't own a professional sports team are losers

I've said it a million times, I think it's a very strong take. If you are a billionaire and you don't own a professional sports team, you're a loser. ... The only reason you get that much money is to go buy a team.

Jake Paul will get destroyed by Anthony Joshua in their upcoming replacement fight

Jake Paul found a replacement fight for the [Gervonta] Tank Davis fight that got canceled, but it's Anthony Joshua this time. Former heavyweight champion. He's gonna get fucked up. ... Anthony Joshua could just starch him.

My ceiling as a golfer might be higher as a lefty

I might be more... I can maybe my my ceiling is higher. Potentially left-handed more good at golf. My ceiling is higher. Damn. We'll see.

The New Orleans Pelicans are 'soft quitting' the season to relocate

The Pelicans are just like soft quitting and gonna probably be in like relocate... they have no promotional calendar for the season... no bobbleheads... they're just soft quitting the Pelicans.

The NFL is rigged to favor the Chiefs

The NFL is rigged. There was a study, UTEP did a study. It's statistically proven that the Chiefs... have gotten way more favorable calls in that timeframe. And they did the research that that did not happen with other dynasties in the past.

The World Cup draw will be rigged for the United States

If anyone could pull it off, Trump doesn't care about soccer. Oh he does. He he's, he took the ball from FIFA. He's been bragging to everybody about how he got the World Cup. Make that happen buddy. Iceland is the smallest country to qualify for the World cup.

Conor McDavid's team-friendly contract was designed to make him easily tradable to a contender

This seems like it would be very easily tradable. Very, very easily tradable contract. He basically, I mean smart by him. If in a year and a half the Oilers aren't competing and he can go somewhere for a year and a half and it doesn't fuck up some team's cap.

Brandel Chamblee is using bots to generate fake YouTube views for Bryson DeChambeau's content

I put him [Brandel Chamblee] on the Hot Seat because there's just no way Brandel Chamblee is this locked in... but he said, 'I have no doubt that bots are generating a lot of those views.'

I am a better rock skipper than both Big Cat and PFT Commenter

I think I'm better than PFT... I didn't say guaranteed, but I think I am [better than both]. I don't know. I just think I'm, I think I'm a good, I'm, I have a lot of experience skipping rocks.

Ben Simmons' career is over now that his agent has dropped him

My Hot Seat is Ben Simmons... He got dropped by his agent... if you're getting dropped, you're, you're, you must be bad, bad. You just not care. Yeah. At all. He just literally doesn't care even enough to like take a contract, bad sign. So he's just not, he's he's not represented currently.

Mike McDaniel is in trouble because analysts like Rex Ryan are starting to mock his 'nerd boy' persona

My Hot Seat is Mike McDaniel because now it's open season. Rex Ryan called him McGenius... called him said McGenius guy or whatever the hell he is. Nerd boy. Their team has no respect for their coach. They play like that. They're soft. Every part of their football team it's over.

The Buccaneers could make a Super Bowl run

My Cool Throne for today is the Tampa Bay Buccaneers. Because after watching Baker go over to top to Buca and, you know, Buca didn't get a ton of yards, but he was fighting for every yard that he got. I keep watching clips and I keep, I keep having this thought in the back of my head. Like, we could just, we might, we could just make a run... it could go to the Super Bowl.

Winning the Ryder Cup as a playing captain would make Keegan Bradley an all-time legend, perhaps better than winning a major

If he wins as the playing captain, you're an all time legend. All time... Winning as a playing captain might be better than winning a major. I think I could see that being the truth.

MLB cannot let Shohei Ohtani win MVP because of the gambling and real estate controversies

I mean it, you can't, if you're the MLB, you can't have Shohei Ohtani with all these controversies being the base of your league. The gambling one, yeah, maybe blame it on the interpreter. Fool me once, shame on you. Fool me twice... we're about to give this guy his fourth MVP in five years? MLB writers really need to do like justice here because they are the keepers of the game.

Bryce Harper is right that players are willing to lose a whole season over a salary cap.

He's right-ish... [Manfred] is pitching the salary cap right to the players circumventing the MLBPA. And it's their job to hear from the owners and then take that to the rank and file players. And then Harper's like, 'If you're gonna say that, get the fuck out.' Bryce Harper is right. Bryce is right about this... He can afford to lose 162 games. The guys at the top can afford to lose 162 games.

Planet Earth needs an alien invasion to unite humanity

I've said that about wars and aliens. I think Planet Earth could use a good alien invasion because we're sick of beating each other up. It would unite us. We're sick of hitting each other. We wanna take out [the aliens].

Paul George will be the biggest bust in Philadelphia sports history

Paul George, Playoff P, Pre-season P has injured himself again... he's probably gonna go down as the biggest bust in Philly history. Him and Andrew Bynum... Ben Simmons... Markelle Fultz. Playoff P is in the running right now for biggest bust.

If LeBron James wins a title in Cleveland this year, it doesn't count

If he does go to the Cavs and the Cavs win in an East that is beyond depleted this year, we need to just already say this. That doesn't count. The Pacers are out of it, the Bucks are probably out of it. Coward move if he wins a title with the Cavs.

High school football players should be paid

We've been complaining to the NCAA you gotta pay the players. We might have to just switch up to high school football now. You gotta pay the players. Pay these guys. Pay the high school players... babies should get paid.

Conor McGregor leaked his own nude photos on purpose

Conor McGregor, I'm starting to think he might not be a good guy... maybe he was trying to get his dick out. That was like, 'cause you can't leak it yourself. So he was just doing this on purpose to be like, I want to just let everyone know that there's my penis.

CONCACAF is rigged to ensure the United States doesn't win the Gold Cup

I join the chorus of those who were saying CONCACAF rigged. They don't want to see the United States win the Gold Cup. They'd much rather have it be Mexico.

The evidence of Malik Beasley gambling on his own games is absurdly obvious

The videos that came out after the investigation came out were very bad to say the least. I don't know if it's one of those things where if you could do this for any player... but the videos that came out were absurdly obvious that he was probably gambling on games.

TJ Watt is unhappy in Pittsburgh and wants to leave

TJ Watt... he's gonna cost a lot of money. I think he's unhappy and I think he wants to go... I could imagine TJ Watt wearing a Green Bay Packers jersey.

Sports owners should be forced to sell if their team doesn't make the playoffs for five consecutive years

I think they should have a new rule in own, in, in all sports that if, what call it five years, if you don't make the playoffs in five years, automatic sale. Like whatever the threshold is, that would be awesome. 'cause relegation is never gonna come to American sports. But if you could relegate owners that would be sick.

Apple is going to force brain chips on everyone and we'll have no choice but to accept them

I don't want it, but it's coming. It's gonna happen and I'm gonna have to get it... So it's chip or be left behind. Correct. No choice. We just have to chip.

Cal Raleigh should be a legitimate candidate for AL MVP.

We talked about Cal Raleigh on Monday and how awesome he is and he should be considered for the MVP.

It is understandable for a player with a $700 million contract to occasionally lack hustle to first base

If someone paid me $700 million to play baseball, I would sometimes not run to first base. 'cause I would probably just be distracted and be like, shit, why am I running to first base? I have $700 million. That was an out. ... It's human nature.

NFL players are arrogant to think they can easily dominate international flag football competition

It's so arrogant for NFL players to think that they can just go in and dominate [flag] football. ... I'm just imagining like a, a Croatian dude trying to grab the flag of Lamar Jackson. ... he would never be down.

Tom Cruise used Top Gun: Maverick to make people forget about his Scientology controversies

Tom Cruise... Scientology thing is very weird... He just was like, yeah, I'm gonna put out a new Top Gun and everyone's gonna forget about that. ... It felt like the block was getting a little hot with the documentaries and everything. He's like, I know. Top Gun two. People won't care anymore.

Caleb Williams being seen with supermodels makes him a QB1 over Jaden Daniels

Caleb Williams was in Miami and he got out of a car at a restaurant with three different like supermodels. Hell yeah. That's that's that's a QB one you want. Yeah. That's QB one actually. That's Aura. Not a helicopter mom. 24-year-old.

Paige Bueckers will be a better pro than Caitlin Clark

I still think Paige Bueckers gonna be a better pro. I know, I know, she, I think Paige is gonna be better.

Doc Rivers has won three games in a playoff series many times and doesn't get enough credit for it

When he [Doc Rivers] loses the three-one leads, he's won three games. That should be worth something. Like if you get up 28 to three against the Patriots of the Super Bowl, that should be worth something.