Takes

The Wisconsin Badgers are going on a miracle run in March

I am all in on the Badgers. They're good... and I'm believing, I'm believing in a miracle March run. I'm usually pretty honest about where my heart is... I'm gonna be unsafe in March. If they keep playing the way they're playing, I'm gonna be emotionally unsafe.

Every Arizona fan is scared to play Wisconsin in the tournament

Every Arizona fan heard you say that and like, Max is the dumbest person ever. He doesn't know ball. Every Arizona fan is scared of Wisconsin. That's a fact... We whooped them twice in the Elite Eight to go to the Final Four.

Joel Embiid ducked Nikola Jokic in Denver

We were robbed of Joel Embiid playing in Denver against Jokic. 15 minutes before the game, he's like, no, I don't wanna play. I wanna duck... He hasn't played in Denver since 2019. He likes to play Jokic at home and then he's an 'out' guy... when they get to Denver, his knee hurts.

The NFL rules have gone too far in favoring high-scoring offenses

The offense is so great. You can't tell me that the rule changes they've made have not forced this to just be an insane... every game is in the 240s total wise. Guys are scoring 70. You can't hold or grab anyone. You can't touch 'em. I think they've gone too far.

Caitlin Clark's court storming collision was an 'all-time flop'

It was a flop. I saw the alternate angle. Caitlin Clark... she leaned into the contact. The girl was just running, minding her own business, and Caitlin Clark shoved her and then just did a pirouette and fell. It's crazy. This is insane. Justice for the other girl.

Jerry Reinsdorf is a 'half-ass' owner who set the Bulls Ring of Honor up to fail

Jerry Reinsdorf being the absolute worst. ... He's a fucking half-ass owner. He's bullshit. ... he knew that [Jerry Krause] was gonna get booed. ... He set it up. ... I'm not like absolving the fans, but I think that the real blame should be Jerry Reinsdorf for putting together a half-ass thing.

Max Homa will win a major championship this year

Max Homa is gonna win a major this year. I think this year. Hundred percent.

Draymond Green has learned his lesson and won't punch anyone again

I predict that Draymond has learned his lesson. He won't do this again. I think that Draymond had a brief mental error, a brief moment where he blacked out a little bit, a heated gaming moment and he, he will not be making that mistake again. Draymond's a new man.

I will eat 50 Dairy Queen blizzards as my New Year's resolution

My New Year's resolution is I'm gonna eat more blizzards, Dairy Queen blizzards... New Year's resolutions are, to me, less about changing yourself for the better and more about just doing the things you like more... I'm thinking like 50.

Shohei Ohtani to the Dodgers is not more impactful than Jackie Robinson

Ben Verlander... said that Shohei Ohtani to the Dodgers is the most important signing in Dodgers history... Jackie Robinson? ... Pretty impactful. The word impactful was really interesting to us. Most important, most impactful.

The NBA is back to being irrelevant

Who's back? NBA being Irrelevant.

Charlie Woods is going to completely transform the game of golf

I think when all is said and done, Charlie Woods is gonna be the guy that completely transforms golf. Agreed. Yeah. He's gonna break the, break the mold.

Every MLB free agent contract is technically an overpay but it doesn't matter without a salary cap

If the roles were reversed, you would be so over the moon about this. And yes, every contract free agent contract in MLB history is an overpay because you're paying for past accomplishments and who cares? There's no salary cap. It's not your money.

The NFL should allow players to wear either zero, one, or three-plus mouthpieces

Anthony Evans... was wearing not one, not two, but three mouthpieces at once on his person. He's got a red one in his mouth, yellow one hanging down, and then he has a third mouthpiece that's jammed into his left ear hole on his helmet. I kind of love three mouthpiece. Congress needs to step in. You can't do two. You can do three or more. You can do one, zero, or three or more. That's my ruling.

Greg Popovich's move to stop fans from booing was great sportsmanship

My who's back is sportsmanship. Oh. Last week in San Antonio, Greg Popovich during Kawhi Leonard's free throws... he hopped on the mic and he told the fans to stop booing... It was sportsmanship at its finest.

Jayden Daniels should and will win the Heisman

Jayden Daniels. Eight touchdowns... against Georgia State... He is now the favorite to win the Heisman... I don't think that you can honestly make a case that it should be anybody except for Jayden Daniels.

Jim Harbaugh will leave Michigan for the NFL after this season

I think that him accepting his punishment is a sign. He might be on the outs, which I'm excited for. Except he might go to the Chargers, which I'm not excited for.

The NBA mid-season tournament courts are an abomination

I fucking hate the NBA mid-season tournament courts. Hate them. Don't understand why they do it. They all look gross. The suns was one of the most disgusting courts I've ever seen.

The entire PMT crew should campaign for Jaden Daniels to win the Heisman

I think as a group we should get behind Jaden Daniels plus 550. I think we should get behind Jaden Daniels make that bet and try to bang on that drum... we have to do is basically propaganda stats of Jaden Daniels to get everyone in the world being like, did you know Jaden Daniels actually better than everyone else?

Francis Ngannou actually won the fight against Tyson Fury

Tyson Fury, they boxed Tyson Fury, Francis Ngannou this weekend... Francis Ngannou also has the, the perfect, he like champion fighters... Split decision. But a lot of people were saying that he won.

Tyson Fury was embarrassingly out of shape for the Ngannou fight

Tyson Fury always looks a little bit outta shape, but he looked so outta shape next to Ngannou. Just like they look like different species... he was the heaviest he's ever been was he? That's what they said. Which bullshit for the announcers to say that.

Dylan Brooks is successfully embracing the villain role in the NBA

My who's back of the week is Dylan Brooks being a villain... I think he's embracing being the villain. I think it's good.

Jose Altuve is the most clutch baseball player since David Ortiz

Altuve might be the most clutch guy since Big Papi. Every big moment he comes up huge.

I only eat chicken tenders and don't like seafood

I have [had shrimp] but seafood's not really. Not really my thing. ... Chicken tenders. ... [Shirley Temples] I can get a Sprite whenever I want, but if I go to a restaurant or something, get a Shirley Temple. Class it up a little bit.

Victor Wembanyama looks like he's going to be the greatest player of all time

Victor Wembanyama has been playing in the preseason and he looks like he's gonna be the greatest player of all time. I've never seen anybody the way he plays basketball. He's crazy... He puts like a dome over the rim. It's insane.

Silent walking is a ridiculous Gen Z trend that just describes thinking

My who's back the week is a new trend. It's called Silent Walking... walking without your phone... this person has never had an inner dialogue. I have an inner dialogue every day. I'm doing a lot of thinking. I got multiple dialogues.

The Colorado Avalanche will win the Stanley Cup

I've got the B's avalanche. I'll go with you on the Avalanche Hank. I've got back to back. [Vegas] I've got the avalanche.

The Celtics are back to being the favorites to win the NBA championship

The Celtics today acquired Jrue Holiday... And they're back to being the favorite to win the NBA championship. It's an elite defensive back court with him and Derrick White. Tatum, Brown, it's gonna be exciting.

I would understand if the 76ers decided to trade Joel Embiid

It's not that I want to trade Embiid, but if we were to get like a very great offer... The Sixers are nowhere near [winning a title] right now... If that did happen, I wouldn't be like devastated. It would make sense to me.

College kids should storm the field whenever they want, regardless of point spreads

My who's back of the week is people getting mad about kids running on Fields... People getting upset because Colorado won as a 24 point favorite against Colorado State in overtime and then everyone took to Twitter... I don't know how we keep having this debate. If you're between the ages of 18 and 24, squeeze all the fun outta life that you possibly can... People who are criticizing you probably are jealous that they don't have that much fun left to go.

Novak Djokovic is the GOAT and Federer is a boy toy

The Joker 24 and counting. Joker's the best. He's the goat. I root for winners. I am a winner. I root for winners. Joker the man. Your little fucking boy toy. Roger Federer. Joker's Got you. Bitch.

Messi's assist against the Red Bulls was the craziest pass I've ever seen

Beat the Red Bulls scored another or no? Yeah. Unbelievable goal. Probably the craziest pass I've ever seen in the, in the sport of football... I think it was [better than his World Cup pass].

Donald Trump is the best golfer in the United States

Rick Re says that it wasn't actually 67. I don't be a hater, Rick. He says it was more like an 86... [Trump] is the best golfer in the United States.

Herm Edwards is a total fraud for the mess he left at Arizona State

My who's back is Herm Edwards being a fraud because Arizona State has a bull ban... He's on ESPN giving speeches about, you know, upstanding character and doing the right thing. And he just left this mess in his past. So he is a total fraud.

The Yankees should extend both Aaron Boone and Brian Cashman

I think they should extend Aaron Boone. Yeah. I think he's the steady hand and Cashman. I think Aaron Boone is a steady hand that the Yankees need to control their franchise. ... We official vote of confidence as they should extend both of them. Yes.

Signing Aaron Judge to a mega-deal was a mistake

Build around Aaron Judge. ... I don't know if you wanna build around Aaron Judge. He's like 32 isn't he? They just signed him to a mega deal. I know that was a mistake. ... He's gonna be 32 before next season. Okay. Whew. And he's got like 14 years left on his contract.

James Harden is still the better option for the Sixers compared to the alternative

I think [Harden] is better than the alternative, but I think Daryl Morey's just gonna do this thing... I'm just going in. We're gonna do the whole Ben Simmons thing again.

Anyone who wears glasses is a dork

Glasses can look cool, but if you said to anyone, would you rather wear glasses or not? Everyone's picking not. Take four eyes, dude, you're a dork. Like that's just a fact. You're a dork.

I don't want to start a family because aliens will likely kill us all within five years

I like thinking that aliens are real because then it really is like there's no reason to do anything. 'cause like within five years, like the aliens are gonna just come up and fuck us off. ... Like starting a family. It's like, I don't wanna, I don't wanna have kids like aliens are gonna come and kill 'em all. Yeah. Like, I don't, like I'm just gonna, I'm just gonna keep doing my thing.

The Texans offense will be much better than people think this year

He's [John Metchie] back in training camp. He looks awesome. ... I'm just saying, I think, I think the Texans on offense this year are gonna be way better than we think. I like Stroud. How do you do that? I'm a Stroud boy.

Travis Kelce is a pussy for fighting Jack Cochrane in training camp

Jack Cochrane's the dude who pissed off Travis Kelce. So shout out that guy for exposing Travis Kelce for being a pussy. ... That was getting into it. 'cause he got hit once just like a little bit after the play and he got pissed off.

The Ravens will win the Super Bowl

I see a play like that. I'm like, Raven Super Bowl. Yes I have. I have the Ravens for the Super Bowl. I've bought into the hype. It won't burn me at all.

MLS team names like Inter Miami and Real Salt Lake are stupid

I fucking hate MLS team names. Yeah. Inter Miami... I love the entire aesthetic of Inter Miami... but it's just the team names are stupid when it's like inter Miami Ray Salt Lake. FC Sporting kc. Yeah. Gimme a fucking break.

NFL teams should not be allowed to wear throwback uniforms from a city they moved away from

The Houston Oilers are back. The Tennessee Titans unveiled their throwback uniforms... if you move your team to a different city, you can take those colors. I get that. But you can never actually put on the Houston Oilers... uniform... You're neither Houston nor Oilers. And they're iconic. They're great... It sucks. It sucks.

There is a 25% chance Dan Snyder does not sell the Commanders

I'm realizing that there's probably like a 25% possibility that he does stick around for the rest of my life. Owns the team... and I'll probably die before he does.

The Vegas Sphere is the coolest thing ever and the future of advertising

It's maybe the coolest thing I've ever seen. Like, I feel like it's gonna be everywhere all the time now. Like it's the, it's the future. ... However much it costs to advertise on it is like it's better than a billboard.

Jordan Spieth is wearing a cheap $500 Instagram ad suit that hides 'fat and frumpy' bodies

Jordan Spieth has a lot, a lot of money. But I think I have that same suit and I understand what happened. ... I think he's wearing a $500 Instagram suit. ... It's a stretchy material that doesn't iron well. And so it's like, it's like a, it's like almost like a, it's like an Under Armour shirt in a suit form.

Football players who don't play and then transfer are 'snitches' for reporting hazing

No dudes who don't play in transfer are the biggest snitches ever. ... Cuz they're, they're the only ones who's like, there's something wrong with this program. It's not wrong with me. It's the program that's wrong.

Tom Brady is a 'trophy husband' who needs a sugar mama like Kim Kardashian

Tom Brady is a stay-at-home dad. He needs to find another sugar mama to pay his bills because he always likes women who make more than him. That's just the facts. ... He's a trophy husband. ... Now he's looking for someone to take care of him.

There are more trees in Canada than there are stars in the Milky Way

You know what I learned today? There's more trees in Canada than there are Stars in the Milky Way. Is that true? Damn. Yeah. I went to a museum today.