Takes

The NFL should remove the franchise tag for the running back position

It would probably be a little bit easier if there was just no franchise tag for running back. You can use it on anybody else... but if there's a running back, you can't tag 'em. So they play their first contract, then there will be an actual bidding war for their services.

Shohei Ohtani's viral bat flip against the Yankees was awkward and forced

I'll stand by this take. I didn't think it was a good flip. He looked awkward. It looked like an awkward bat flip. Everyone was freaking out about it. I thought he looked awkward. It didn't look natural. It looked like he forced that bat flip.

The city of Philadelphia will never win a championship in any sport ever again

My Cool Throne is the city of Philadelphia never winning anything ever. Joel Embiid, our prince... made comments the other day that he wants to win a Championship in Philadelphia or anywhere else... It seems like if he doesn't win this year in Philly, he's probably out.

I am officially coming out of the closet as a Kirk Cousins fan

I'm coming out of the closet as a Kirk Cousins fan. I've buried it so deep that I overcompensated for loving Kirk Cousins by hating him so much these last few years. I love Kirk Cousins as a person. One of the greatest dudes, hard not to root for.

Bill Belichick is officially on the hot seat with the New England Patriots

My Hot Seat is Bill Belichick. Literally. There's a report out... from Tom Curran... he said 'You talk about avoiding the Hot Seat Rich, he's on the Hot Seat and he's been there at different levels of warmth since 2019.'

Almost every NFL team would immediately fire their coach to hire Bill Belichick if he became available

How many teams currently would fire their coach to hire Bill Belichick? Everyone would love him. It would be everyone but maybe the Chiefs and the 49ers. It can't be more than like five teams total that wouldn't fire their current coach... that's why you don't fire Bill Belichick. He would get a job instantly.

The 'horns down' gesture is officially back and allowed in the SEC

You can use horns down because according to John McDade, the SEC's coordinator of officials on penalizing for horns down signal in '24... he said that you can use horns down against Texas.

LIV Golf players sold their souls and should be shunned by golf fans

I hope everybody in LIV dies in a fiery boat accident. I hate LIV, I hate the whole idea. But imagine you guys, if they took half the NFL and said, 'hey, half the teams are gonna move to Saudi Arabia, we're gonna pay 'em five times what they're worth'... That's what happened to my sport... Tiger didn't [take the money]. And so I love Tiger for that.

The Saudis do not care about golf and are only using it to sports wash their image

Do you know how many golf courses Saudi Arabia has? They got nine. They don't care about golf. They're trying to sports wash their image.

Russell Wilson is spent as an elite quarterback

I kind of think Russell [Wilson] is spent. And also could you not take yourself so seriously? ... Russell's not, I don't know what he thinks he's gonna be ambassador to Sweden or something. He's gonna be the governor of Colorado. I don't know what he thinks, but he's not being a regular guy.

The David Montgomery run against the Packers is the greatest highlight in football history

If we did a Mount Rushmore of legendary runs, that [David Montgomery run] is number one. We'll always have 'the run'. It's number one.

The Masters is the best major, but the American Century celebrity tournament is second

I'd go Masters still first. I'd go American Century second. I have Steph Curry this week to finish top 10... A good British Open is like tied second with a Ryder Cup for me. But I would say Masters first no matter what.

Brooks Koepka at 18-to-1 is the best value to win the Open Championship

I like Brooks [Koepka] a lot this week. Whenever we go into these majors, he's right there with the top three or four guys... except he's whatever, 18 to one. And you've got Rory... at plus six 50. I'm taking Brooks Koepka, I watched his presser, he seemed incredibly confident.

If a golfer goes 10 years without a major title, they should lose one existing major for every additional year they go winless

PFT: If [Rory] doesn't win in a 10 year span, he goes back to never having won a major. Kirk: I would say, yeah, my argument would be he take one away for every year [past] 10. It's now 10 years since this guy won a major Championship.

Rory McIlroy will not win the 2023 Open Championship because he won't win two weeks in a row

I don't like that Rory [McIlroy] won last week. That gives me bad vibes back to back. I don't think he's gonna win two weeks in a row. I kind of wish he had lost.

LeBron James' non-retirement announcement was a calculated move to dominate a slow news cycle

I think [LeBron James] planned this out just because he was like, 'You know what? I wanna make a splash at the ESPYs this year. How can I do that? Okay, I'll tease it. I'm gonna retire after getting swept by the Denver Nuggets. And then, in early July when nobody's paying attention to sports, I'm gonna dominate the news cycle.'

Rory McIlroy will miss the cut at the Open Championship because it's 'too much of a storybook ending'

I have a hot take. I think [Rory McIlroy] is gonna miss the cut. Yeah, I think everything, because the last time they played here was the last time he won a major. He's been playing good golf. He won this weekend. Everyone—it's almost too much of a storybook ending and I think he's just gonna come out and blow up.

DeAndre Hopkins chose money over winning by signing with the Titans

Way to take the air out of it. If [DeAndre Hopkins] had been added to a Chiefs and Eagles—one of these Niners—one of these teams that's competing for Super Bowl... he's going the Titans. Everyone's like, 'Okay, cool.' I guess it's good for the Titans, but I feel like the Titans are in a weird transition period right now... Money is always, I don't know what everyone else was offering him, but it's nice to say 'I want to go compete for a ring,' but if the Titans offered him 12 and everyone else was offering him five, 7 million is probably nice too.

DeAndre Hopkins picking the Titans is a direct 'ricochet shot' at the Patriots and Mac Jones

This is an ultimate ricochet shot at the entire Patriots organization too. When those are his three criteria and he's like, 'I wanna play for a good quarterback,' and he picks Ryan Tannehill over Mac Jones.

Alcaraz's majors are 'Mickey Mouse majors' compared to Djokovic's era, but I am still an Alcaraz fan

[Djokovic] had to go against Roger [Federer] and Rafa [Nadal] and won all those. So Alcaraz is going to win Mickey Mouse majors. That's fine... I'm an Alcaraz fan now. Not as big of a Djokovic, but I'm an Alcaraz fan as well.

Aaron Rodgers will have an incredible year with the Jets

I think Aaron Rodgers is gonna have an incredible year. I've become—the script has been flipped on me where I'm now defending Aaron Rodgers, the player, publicly and it feels dirty. But I also, I want—I don't want him to fall off when he's gone. That would suck for me. I want him to be really good.

Aaron Rodgers is immune to the New York media circus

Aaron Rodgers is immune to the media circus. He's got natural immunity to the New York media.

Zach Wilson is still the future of the Jets

I still think that [Zach Wilson] has the physical capabilities to be, you know, an amazing Mahomes quarterback. The man can make any throw on the field. I mean, his head, you know, he's young. He's confused... but the man can make some amazing throws and I hope Aaron Rodgers gets his head right.

There is a 25% chance Dan Snyder does not sell the Commanders

I'm realizing that there's probably like a 25% possibility that he does stick around for the rest of my life. Owns the team... and I'll probably die before he does.

The Super Bowl holding call on James Bradberry was a 'tick-tack' call that ruined the game's ending

I still don't think it was a great call... It just seemed so ticky-tack in the moment and it changed the way that game was viewed from a historical context. There's no question. I don't care who wins the game. I want to see what was a historically great Super Bowl have a historically great ending.

If Mario Cristobal can't turn Miami football around, it can't be done

I said this from the time he got the job. If [Mario Cristobal] can't turn Miami back into what we all remember Miami, it just can't be done. It just can't be done.

The 2001-2002 Miami Hurricanes could have been competitive in the NFL

I mean, they're not gonna win the Super Bowl, but they'd be more competitive than some of the bottom teams that we see year in and year out at the bottom of the league. There's no question... That Nebraska team [they beat], that's the best college football team of all time.

Travis Kelce 'runs soft' and doesn't run enough people over

I don't think he runs that... like he does get crazy yak, but I don't think he, like, he doesn't run anyone over... I just would like to see him do it... it comes up in the him versus Gronk debate.

Travis Kelce will be the GOAT tight end with one or two more productive seasons

I've said on record, if [Travis] Kelce has another even year or two like the last seven, in my mind he goes down as the best ever. I never in a million years would've thought anyone would ever catch [Tony] Gonzalez... I think Kelce's a year or two away from doing it.

The 'Open Championship' should be referred to as the 'British Open'

Fuck the Open Championship. The British Open.

The AWLs' dominance of the podcast industry might actually be a bad thing

Are the [AWLs] bad for podcast listeners? It might be. So there are 28, I believe, Awards we're giving out tonight.

We will host the 10th annual Takie Awards as a live show in Las Vegas

10 Takie. We gotta... do a live show. 10th Takie Vegas. What if we did a live show in Vegas? Sold it out. Took that money, put it on red. That would be fun responsibly.

It is fair to laugh at the President when they fall because walking is a basic human skill

Walking is one of the first things we learned to do. Someone's like, would you make fun of your grandmother if she fell? I was like, well my grandmother's dead and she's not the president. You kind of sign up to get made fun of by becoming president when you fall.

Victor Wembanyama is a bust

Victor Wembanyama from France. The Frenchman not played in Summer League. Bust. Oh, okay. I like that take.

Chiefs Aholic is the last outlaw of the West

Chiefs Aholic is really the last outlaw of the West. Roaming from Kansas City to Oklahoma, even to Arizona for the Super Bowl on leave. He did not report to court. And he's probably down in Mexico like many outlaws before him. You know, embodying the spirit of those like Josie Wales, Wild Bill Hickok.

My career at PMT will eventually become a legendary redemption hero story

I will win one and it'll be a real redemption hero story for the ages. I'm sure people are gonna be writing novels about me.

Charlie Woods will start his own professional golf league

Tiger Woods' [son] Charlie is gonna start his own golf league. A professional golf league. Outside. That's why he has him a commenting.

Villanova will lose in the National Championship game this year

Villanova's gonna lose the national championship this year. I was going to say Final Four and then I knew what your joke was going to be. So I said it first.

The AWLs will tune into the PLL tonight

The AWLs will tune into the PLL tonight. ESPN Plus. Calling the Waterdogs game tonight.

Pardon My Take and Barstool will reach a new level of success in Chicago

I really think that you guys are gonna take Pardon My Take and Barstool Sports as a whole to the next level in Chicago. I think you guys are really gonna do some amazing stuff out there and create some awesome content.

The Ravens will win the Super Bowl

I had two [takes]. One is that the Ravens are gonna win the Super Bowl. I just feel it. I don't know why. I think Lamar Jackson's have a great year.

Dan Snyder will rebuy the Washington Commanders

My other one is Dan Snyder's gonna rebuy the Washington Commanders. Wouldn't that be the funniest thing ever? There's no chance that happens.

Mohammed bin Salman will buy the LPGA and ban drivers for women

I'm just gonna say that Mohammed bin Salman is gonna buy the LPGA and the women aren't gonna be allowed to use drivers anymore.

I blew the lead at the Masters because Blakes don't win anything

I decided to blow the lead at the Masters because Blakes don't win anything. Right? Yep. So I figured that that was my way in, unfortunately, a couple weeks before I won [the PGA], but yeah, I figured that was... Blakes haven't won anything.

The 2024 Blake of the Year will be an in-person event featuring a golf scramble

Next year we're getting everyone together... no more Zoom. And we'll figure out a way to do a in-person Blake of the Year... We'll do a five-man scramble versus Brooks.

The National League winning the 2023 All-Star Game is the biggest sports victory of the summer

The NL is back baby. The NL is back. We've won the All-Star game, the most important game in the entire summer. It's the only time both teams put out their best effort, put out their best guys. The NL's back on top.

MLB has the most competitive All-Star game of any major sport

Somehow Baseball does have the most competitive All-Star game when you look across every sport. Yes. They all sucked. They all sucked.

College football is a better viewing experience than the NFL because the players make more errors

I love NFL, but college football I miss the most because of the chaotic energy. Like that is the chaotic energy sport because you have guys messing up and making mistakes that just leads to craziness. MLB, they're so fucking good... It's a real big bummer. I wanna see more errors, I wanna see more, you know, chaotic energy.

The Home Run Derby should replace the kids in the outfield with fat, drunk adults who we can laugh at for getting hit

I'd rather, if it weren't kids out there, why not just get a bunch of fat like college 20 to 30 year old kids, guys drunk as hell. Fat, like sloppy fat, just falling on their face, getting hit with balls, all that stuff. Cuz then we can laugh as a country, we can laugh at them.

Players caught using steroids should be able to win their freedom back by winning the Home Run Derby

I was thinking that they could incorporate a rule change where if a player gets busted for steroids, they could then elect compete in the home run Derby to win their freedom to win their way out. If they win the home run Derby, they get to come back for the rest of the year and they get to continue using steroids for the rest of the year.