Takes

Tom Brady will end up in Las Vegas or Miami next season

Las Vegas feels like Tom Brady would want to go out there and finish his career there. Now they've got McDaniels out there, they're cutting their quarterback or trading their quarterback. And if you're a divorced man in your forties. Yep. What city do you want? ... He, he either go to Miami.

Losing to Ohio State in the National Championship would be a program ruiner for Michigan

If we lose Ohio State, that is 10 million times worse than Georgia. That is a program ruiner for Michigan. Yes.

Justin Jefferson should be the NFL MVP because the Vikings would have five fewer wins without him

I think Justin Jefferson should be actually the MVP looked at as the MVP... If you took him off the team, I think if I have like four or five less wins. He's that important in that dominant as a receiver.

I'm going to be cut by the Titans and hit the free market this offseason

Oh no, I'll be cut. I'll be free... I'll be on the free market. I know I'm gonna get cut. So cool.

Corn is botanically a fruit

Corn is a fruit. If you look it up, corn is a fruit. It has fruit qualities... the kernels of corn are fruit.

If you're down eight with two minutes left, just take the points

You kick a field goal there. Just take the points. Just take the points, that's it.

Justin Jefferson should be the NFL MVP

I think Justin Jefferson should be the MVP of the NFL. I'm saying that, I know it's not numbers based like Patrick Mahomes, it's always a quarterback... I think the Vikings have like four or five less wins without Justin Jefferson because he is always there for huge plays.

Mac Jones is football's Grayson Allen

Mack Jones, like... his body language, those plays, like twisting guy's ankles, hitting people in the balls and then, and then just screaming at everyone... He's football Grayson Allen.

The Buccaneers suck and won't do anything in the playoffs

I'm actually sticking with my take. They suck. They suck. Like they just, they just had to go to overtime to beat Trace McSorley. They suck. They suck. They're not gonna do anything in the fucking playoffs. They suck. They're bad.

Zach Wilson is completely lost mentally and is likely irredeemable

Zach Wilson is so bad. ... he can't, I don't think he, he's redeemable at this point because you've now benched him twice for two different quarterbacks. ... I think Zach Wilson is completely lost. ... he's, he's completely lost mentally.

The Saints and Browns will go over the 32-point total despite historically bad weather

I'm going lowest to the low. Ground Saints 32. Deshaun Watson unders have been the easiest bet since he started three, three easy unders. He's due for an over. And weather doesn't matter.

Ryan Day is effectively on the hot seat if Ohio State gets blown out by Georgia

I think this game's really important for Ryan Day. ... I don't think they have to win it, but I think if they get blown out after coming off the Michigan [loss]... he's kind on the hot seat now. ... You can't lose to Michigan if you're the Ohio State coach. Not anymore.

You cannot stop the run if you are wearing the Seahawks' lime green jerseys

I hope you're saying what I'm gonna think thinking, but you cannot stop the run if you're wearing those jerseys. Well, and you also have to go full lime green... Even if you do commit to it, I still think that you're gonna get gashed on the ground. If you're wearing those jerseys, you might, like, if you go full lime green, you're gonna be able to pin your ears back and get a few sacks on the board. But it does, it seems like that those are jerseys that'll just get run on.

Zach Wilson has been working on his fundamentals and he might be back

I do think Mike White's gonna get the wind though. Big time with Zach Wilson being QB two now. I know. So there's a little fire underneath him... And he's been working on his fundamentals.

Max Crosby is the best defensive player in the NFL right now

Max Crosby's the best defensive player in his league. Now I talked to Nick Bosa last week... I go, he plays every single play Nick... nobody plays a game like Max Crosby right now. He plays every snap. Nobody can block him. The run game. Nobody makes more tackles from the defensive end position than Max.

The Dolphins are a 'candy ass' team because they used heaters in 55-degree weather

I'm going to guess that's not great for them having to go to Buffalo on Saturday night. You shouldn't smoke during NFL games... I would say that that's the sign of a candy ass team heaters for 55 degree weather. And just so we remind everyone when the dolphins are like decent and they go to a cold weather city at the end of the season, there are no, there is no uniform combo that is more candy ass than what they have.

The Lions are currently the third best team in the NFC

I'm be, I'm joking a little bit when I say that they're the best team in the nfc, they're probably, they're probably number three right now in terms of how they're playing. Yeah. It's probably the Eagles, the 49ers and then the Lions are actually that good.

It might be time for the Steelers to move on from Mike Tomlin

The story of this game, besides Mitch being bad, the Steelers defense has reverted to not being that great... it might be time for Mike Tomlin. Like people are saying that it's very similar to the end of Andy Reid in Philadelphia where it's, he's not a bad coach. He's actually a very good coach. It's just been a very long time and it might be time for a change.

The Seahawks will miss the playoffs because they lost the 'dead dog game'

The team's got no heart. Fuck. I I'm out on the Seahawks after this. Yeah. Well there, you know what, this is the curse of turf. They, I'm telling you like, they're not gonna make the playoffs because they lost the dead dog game.

The 2022 season is actually Sean McVay's best coaching job ever

Actually the 2022 season was [Sean McVay's] best job as a head coach... they literally have lost their entire team and the season is lost and it's the worst Super Bowl defense ever statistically. But the fact that even the last three games, how the Rams have fought... they're fighting. I might give him my vote for Coach of the Year.

The Dallas Cowboys might actually win the Super Bowl this year

By the way, are the Cowboys gonna win the Super Bowl? I think that the Dallas Cowboys might win the Super Bowl. I think Jerry Jones is ready to die. I honestly think that he's like making no chance. He wants to live forever. He is ready to die and I'm telling you, I think he might will this team to win a Super Bowl so that he can finally just pass away.

The New York Yankees were given juiced baseballs for Aaron Judge's home run chase

A report came out saying that the Yankees were beneficiaries of having juice balls all last year. The Yankees were getting juice balls. Asterisks on his home run record, on his AL home run record. I mean, Jake, how can you discount that? They were purposely giving the best balls in baseball to the New York Yankees last year.

Nick Saban's media tour begging for a playoff spot was pathetic

Nick Saban getting in front of the media and doing his tour where he was like, you know, our team like ask everyone who they'd want to at least play it's us. ... It was pathetic. It was gross to watch to beg.

Matthew Stafford might be done for his career due to his spinal cord injury

I also think that, I think Stafford might be done. He might be done done for his career. ... whatever injury he's suffered the way that they've been handling it has been really like hush hush.

Cristiano Ronaldo is the GOAT

Ronaldo, my goat got benched. People don't like Ronaldo. I don't understand. ... Ronaldo's the goat, Messi's great but Ronaldo greater.

Connor Bedard is the next Connor McDavid

Connor Bedard is being touted as basically another McDavid. ... he's messy of hockey is the way he's being touted as right now. And I think with the way that the games changes game is changing where it all speed skill, I think that he can come in and be that guy.

The Jets will trade Zach Wilson

I think they're gonna end up trading [Zach Wilson] because the way the teams united behind Mike White, I mean Garrett Wilson I think tweeted or said in post game, I'll go to work, I'll get to work something special about that boy talking about Mike White.

The Chargers won't make the playoffs and Brandon Staley will be fired

I'm gonna sprinkle a little little take out there. You ready for this? Chargers don't make the playoffs this year. Brandon Staley gets fired. Sean Peyton coaches the Chargers.

Joe Burrow officially owns Patrick Mahomes

Joe Burrow owns Patrick Mahomes. Yeah, I mean we have a narrative, it's officially a narrative right now, which is kind of cool... Joe Burrow has Patrick Mahomes number.

Kyler Murray's biggest problem is that he is fundamentally a baseball player

Not to be Colin Coward here, but I feel like Kyle and Murray's biggest problem is he's a baseball player. Baseball players, they care about themselves. They have individual accolades. Football is a team sport. Kyle Murray's a baseball player.

Tom Brady is coming back to play for the Patriots next season

I'm kind of, I'm I'm back on Brady. You don't think the reason they left is cuz Giselle. He missed you the entire time. If Brady wants to come back, like that's, that's really all it is. Basically. They have the cap space to do it if they want to, which I'm sure they would. And I'm sure Tom wants to come back.

Ryan Day has set the Ohio State football program back 15 years

Jim Harbaugh said Ryan Day was born on third and thought he had a triple because he took Urban Meyer's machine that dominated Michigan every single year and he basically put it back 15 years in a matter of two... they're back before Tressel.

Taylor Heinicke has proven he is a good quarterback and potentially 'the guy'

Taylor Heinicke at this point has proven, I think that he's a good quarterback. I'm getting close to the point where I'm just ready to, I'm dangerously close to saying he's the guy. I'm very close.

Todd Bowles is a really shitty head coach

Todd Bowles is a really shitty head coach. He stinks. He is so bad. And the Bucks, the Bucks have their problems. They're not a good football team... this game is 100% on Todd Bowles. He coached like a fucking coward. He doesn't know who his quarterback is.

Josh Allen can win you a Super Bowl, Kirk Cousins cannot

Listen, the Vikings are a good team. Josh Allen's ceiling, Kirk Cousins' ceiling, there's a big difference. That's how I view the teams. Josh Allen can win you a Super Bowl. Kirk Cousins cannot.

The Minnesota Vikings will finish 13-4 but inevitably get smoked in the playoffs

I actually think [the Vikings] will win 12 games... I'm saying right now 13 and four is absolutely what they're gonna be I think... they're gonna win the north easily. They're going to have two home playoff games. And what happened today [40-3 loss to Cowboys] will happen again.

The Green Bay Packers are officially dead

The Greeny Packers. Aaron Rodgers looks like he's playing poorly on purpose. That's how bad he's playing tonight... I'm officially saying get out the [shovel]... Their next game is against the Eagles, they're dead. That's a dead team.

It is time for the Packers to bench Aaron Rodgers for Jordan Love

I do think that they're dead. And I do think that it's time to put Jordan Love in at quarterback.

Roman Reigns and I are the only two real stars in wrestling

The two biggest stars in professional wrestling right now are me and Roman Reigns. We are the two people that everybody's talking about. Whether you're a professional wrestling fan or whether you're outside of that professional wrestling bubble.

There is no difference between what Steve Sarkisian has done at Texas and what Tom Herman did

There's no difference between what Sark has done so far at Texas and what Tom Herman had did. Actually, Tom Herman was better at this point. He beat more ranked teams, he went to a bowl.

Sam Bankman-Fried is the latest Bernie Madoff

My hot seat is crypto in general. Sam Bankman-Fried from FTX is the latest Bernie Madoff right now. It's been in the news. He had I think about $40 billion and now he has $0 because his entire platform went bankrupt.

Justin Fields should be the #1 pick in a re-draft of the 2021 quarterback class

I think Fields is one. Fields is one, but solely cost... and they're finally building the offense around him obviously.

Josh McDaniels is the worst coach in the NFL

And then he's just been objectively by the numbers terrible. 7-24 [as a head coach]. The worst coach in the nfl. So very bad coach. McDaniels bad coach.

Austin Ekeler will score three touchdowns against the 49ers

I'm going to again say that Austin Ekeler is going triple dick. This shit out of him. The Niners are gonna be airtight triple dick. Let's go.

Mac Jones is definitively not the guy to lead the Patriots long-term

I would put a tattoo bet on it right now that [Mac Jones] is not gonna realize anything resembling long-term NFL success. ... everybody locally in Boston understands that he has a C arm at best. Like he's a good leader of men... but that only goes so far.

Lamar Jackson will pull a 'Joe Flacco' and win the Super Bowl in a contract year

Wouldn't that be so Ravens too? I was about to say for Lamar [Jackson] to win the Super Bowl in a contract year... And they have to pay him the Flacco. That would be, he would pull a full Flacco on you.

Carson Wentz was not the problem in Indianapolis; it was everyone else

I think I actually take Carson Wentz's side in the breakup. Because like they remember how much they bashed him and were like, he's not a leader. He's the reason we lost the Jags. Now that we've moved away from it, you know, eight months and we've seen some more stuff. I think Carson Wentz was not the problem. It was just all the other guys.

Brian Kelly will create an LSU program that consistently beats Alabama

This now feels like it could be Brian Kelly could create a team at LSU that consistently can beat Alabama. Not one year where you have the like this incredible, incredible team and talent. It's no, every year LSU should be able to compete with Bama.

Connor McDavid is the most dominant pro athlete in the world right now

Conor McDavid is the best pro athlete right now... Conor McDavid dominates hockey more than any other athlete in the world dominates theirs.

Cale Makar will be the greatest defenseman of all time

Kale Makar is number two... Kale Makar is the Conor McDavid of defense. He almost might be more valuable according to Wayne Gretzky... [Nathan McKinnon] said that this will be the greatest defenseman of all time.