Takes

Everyone should bet the over on the 2016 Boca Raton Bowl

Also, let's all bet the over for fun. Just together... Yeah, we're going to hammer the over. Hammer it. Big time.

RG3 will bring the Browns to the promised land

I got the Browns, RG3, bringing them to promised land.

This week in the NFL will be a 'wonky' week where crazy things happen

I think there's gonna be a wonky week. It's one of those weeks where it's just like crazy things happen I just have a feeling... I just I feel like this is gonna be a wonky week.

Vegas is going to make a huge profit in Week 13 at the expense of home underdogs

This is the week that Vegas really sticks it to people. And I think that it's going to come at the expense of a lot of home dogs.

I'm taking the Lions to beat the Vikings on Thanksgiving

I'm going to take the Lions because I took the Vikings on the Pick'em podcast. That's how you keep yourself even there.

I'm taking the Steelers to beat the Colts on Thanksgiving

I got the Vikings, I got the R-words, and I have the Steelers.

The Raiders will beat the Texans in Mexico City as the 'Don Julio Shot of the Week'

And then the Raiders in Mexico City. Hey, what do you say we make that our shot of the week? Don Julio, Mexico tequila. O-Cart Julio. O-Culio. O-Culio shot of the week. Darkheart shot of the week.

The Redskins will beat the Packers in Week 11

And I'm going to walk right into it, and it's going to snatch me up, and I'm taking the Redskins... So I'm going Redskins.

The Patriots will blow out the 49ers in Week 11

Hank, I agree with you on the Patriots. I think they're going to kill the 49ers.

The Jaguars will have a bounce-back week and beat the Texans

I'm going with the Jaguars, too. I think this is their bounce back week. They're at home. I'm going to be jagging off hard on Sunday.

The Steelers will win by two touchdowns against the Cowboys if they have any pride

That Steelers game is actually one of those. Like if the Steelers are any good and have any pride, they win by two touchdowns against the Cowboys.

The Dolphins offensive line is fixed and the Jets are bad

I'm going to go with the Dolphins. I think their offensive line is fixed and going to play well, and I think the Jets are frauds. Not even frauds. They're just bad.

The Titans will lose to the Chargers because they spent too much emotion on their Color Rush game

I don't like the Titans. They're coming off an emotional color rush game against the Jaguars, a rivalry match, so I think that there was a lot of emotion spent in that game that they're not going to be able to pull out.

LSU will lose to Alabama because Coach O is a 'simple coach' who can't handle a two-week bye

I think LSU's fucked this week. My sabermetrics is you can't give Coach O two weeks to do anything. Coach O has to have a game a week... You don't spend 14 days studying 2 plus 2 equals 4.

The Clippers will win over 53.5 games because it is a contract year for Blake Griffin

I'm going to go with the Clippers over. Really? 53 and a half. Blake Griffin... he said that he's healthy and chomping at the bit. A little insider information for you. It's a contract year, too. I think they're going to be ready to go.

The Memphis Grizzlies will lose in six games in the first round of the playoffs

I have a prediction for the Grizzlies. They're going to play really good defense and lose in six games in the first round.

The Celtics will win under 52.5 games because expectations are too high

I'm taking the under on the Celtics. 52.5 feels like too much. It feels like they're going to be a fine team, but it feels more like a 48-49 win team.

The Patriots will kill the Bengals in Week 6

I have the Patriots. Larry didn't pick that, but I think they're going to kill the Bengals.

The Browns will cover the spread against the Patriots in Week 5

So I did not take the Cardinals. So you're a Larry Fitzgerald this week? I am a big-time Larry Fitzgerald. I'm swimming with the Fitzgerald. But you didn't take the Cardinals. I didn't take the Cardinals. So instead of that, I'm going to take the Browns against the Patriots. I'm going to have them covering.

The Patriots covering against the Browns is the easiest bet of all time

Patriots. Yeah, we know you're going to take the Patriots. It's not even bias aside. All bias aside, you can take my bias, put it to the side of me. The Patriots is still the easiest bet of all time.

The Bears will cover +4.5 against the Colts because Indianapolis is jet-lagged after playing in London

I have the Bears. Plus four and a half... the Colts is not a bad choice... They're jet lagged. Yeah. Exactly. First team ever to go to London and not elect to have a bye week after.

The Rams will beat the Seahawks this week

I think [Jeff Fisher] is going to beat the Seahawks this week.

I'm picking the Browns to cover this week because Hugh Jackson made them throw paper in the trash

I'm going to officially change my 49ers pick. I'm going to switch that to the Browns. [Hugh Jackson] having everybody throw their paper in the trash... to me, that's a bro sweet moment.

My Week 1 NFL Lock is the Jaguars +5.5 at home against the Packers

This is my stone cold lock of the week. I've got the Jaguars at home, jagging off big time, plus five and a half against the Packers.

The Bears will win outright against the Texans in Week 1

Bears are going to win outright. Just a heads up, everyone.

The next Larry the Goldfish will survive for at least two or three days

I think this next Larry is going to survive for a while... I think there's a lot of things we can do differently with this Larry that will make him live for at least two or three days.

I'm betting heavy on Wil Myers to win the Home Run Derby because he spells his name with one 'L'

I'm going heavy on Wil Myers. He is listed at plus 600. The guy is all about winning. And it's so efficient. You know how much time he saves in his life by spelling his name W-I-L instead of W-I-L-L?

Giancarlo Stanton will win the 2016 Home Run Derby

I have the artist formerly known as Mike Stanton... ooh, plus 365, the favorite.

The Rio Olympics will be defined by corruption and extortion

Not only is the water full of poop in Rio, but the people that they hired to clean it up stole the money. So pretty classic Olympics we got going on here, folks. We got the environmental stuff. We got the extortion. We got corruption.

Take the under in the Cavaliers-Raptors series

Word to the wise, take the under in the Cavs Raptors series.

My $200 bet on Donald Trump to win the election is looking like a great bet

By the way, just want to say put $200 on Donald Trump about a year ago. That's looking pretty good right now.

Hammer the Reds as underdogs this year and you will become a millionaire

Hammer the Reds this year. Hammer the Reds. They will be underdogs many, many times. You throw it on the Reds. You take that $10, put it right there. Probably make yourself $20, $17. Then you keep doing it. And hopefully the Reds never lose and you become a millionaire.

The Saturday Final Four games will go under because players can't shoot in the NRG Stadium dome

I told everyone i think two days ago the unders are going to come in on saturday no one can shoot in the houston [NRG] something or other dome. So take the unders.

Bet the unders for the Final Four because Houston's NRG Stadium is a very bad shooting stadium

Houston is a very, very bad shooting stadium. Very bad. It's in the big dome, the Reliant Energy Center, whatever the hell it's called. I think it went 7-1 unders last year when they played part of the tournament there.