Takes

The Aaron Rodgers trade to the Jets will likely happen on Night 2 of the draft

They will get Rodgers, my prediction is night two, it probably goes down. And it might involve one of those, the 42nd or 43rd pick, which they have back to back and then some other conditional stuff beyond that.

Joel Embiid falling down on purpose is better for his body's health

The falling is good. The falling is good. Memes and I were watching a video on it... he chooses to fall because it's better for his body. See, you wouldn't understand.

Game 3 against the Grizzlies is LeBron James' first true legacy game

It is now, I'm gonna say it right now. Game three for LeBron is a legacy game. His first ever legacy game. His entire legacy if he doesn't score 40.

Karl-Anthony Towns is the 'worst best guy' in the NBA

Is Karl Anthony Towns just the, the worst like, best guy in the league. He's gotta be right. He probably the worst, best... He's so good. And he also sucks at the exact same time, right? He's the yeah, he's the best player that sucks.

The NBA rigged Game 3 of the Sixers-Nets series to extend it

No, I mean it, it was just blatant at halftime. There was, there was something that happened. There was something that happened at halftime... The Nets had zero fouls in the second half until five minutes to go in the fourth quarter. It was insane. They obviously wanted a series they wanted, but they wanted the game to go more than four games.

The Warriors will win the next four games and sweep the rest of the Kings series

Or the Warriors a sweep from here on out. I was feeling that once you, once you, once you in PFT, once it got past like five minutes of Pro King stuff... this just screams warriors in the next four.

Presidents' Trophy winners rarely do well in the NHL playoffs

I don't know what the stats are, but for my personal feel, it doesn't feel like President's Cups teams do well.

I will smoke crack if the Toronto Maple Leafs win the Stanley Cup

I'll smoke crack if the, if the [Maple Leafs] win the Stanley Cup. How about that? I'll match. I'll take a hit of secondhand crack.

The LIV Tour will eventually do for golf what Tiger Woods did in the late 90s

You just give the live tour three years. And I predict that every kid, every young kid across America, it's gonna do for golf what Tiger Woods did for golf in 19 98, 19 99. It's gonna be a phenomenon.

Tiger Woods could still win one more major despite his ankle surgery

Even after I just said that it felt dirty and it's like, I'm actually already back to maybe he could win one more because he is Tiger Woods... I'm going to erase my retroactive take and then stick with my original take that he could win one more.

I am paying for Twitter Blue because I earned my checkmark as a journalist and don't want to lose it

I have no shame in paying for it because I earned it. We have the slogan of flags fly forever. I earned my check mark a few years ago, so I'm not just gonna let someone take away from it. I grew up on Twitter hoping to have a blue check mark and one day I got it. So like, here we go. I'm keeping it.

Big Cat will pay for a Twitter Blue checkmark within two weeks

I put the over under on Big Cat getting a blue check. Two weeks.

CJ Stroud is a risky draft pick because he is an Ohio State quarterback

CJ Stroud is a very good QB. Very, very good. The only thing is that I got against him is that he's an Ohio State quarterback. And how many really great Ohio State quarterbacks we've seen coming out that just haven't really panned out

Bryce Young is too small and has a slender frame that will lead to injuries

I get the Bryce Young hype. I get it. The thing is... you can't put 30 pounds on Bryce Young. His frame is, his frame is just, it does, it's not gonna work. If you look at his frame, he's slender at the shoulders... Because of that, like, he's gonna be more injury prone.

Stetson Bennett complaining about handcuffs during his arrest is a red flag for his pain tolerance in the NFL

I'm reviewing his body cam footage of his arrest and I, the only thing I didn't like about it was how he bitched about when they put his handcuffs on. He just kept, the first thing he did was complain about how painful the handcuffs were. And I'm like, look man, like pain is temporary, if you get banged up in the game and you start complaining like get your mentals like broken. ... if he's, if you know, if he's got a low pain tolerance, that's one thing.

Anthony Richardson is a 'follower' because he copied Will Levis hitting the ceiling at his pro day

Anthony Richardson did it and said that he hit the roof on purpose because Will Levis did it. This is my red flag. I want my quarterback to be a leader, not a follower. Like he was copying someone else. He was like following the lead.

Hendon Hooker will be the best quarterback of the 2023 draft class

Hendon Hooker wins... I think Hendon Hooker has the best combination of falling to a bad spot and having good enough talent to like make it in the long run.

Draymond Green should not have been suspended for his Game 2 stomp on Domantas Sabonis

I don't think he should have been suspended for it because he got, he got his foot grabbed and it wasn't even that hard of a stomp. Yeah, he's a big guy and you probably shouldn't step on another man's sternum intentionally, but at the same time, like his foot was being grabbed, you gotta get the guy off you somehow. I think it should have been a flagrant, I don't think he should have been suspended.

The Kings will beat the Warriors, but then the Lakers will eliminate them to cause maximum pain

They're gonna beat the Warriors in this series. It's gonna be a great story. The first team to take down the Warriors, the Lakers are then gonna beat them and it's gonna be all the bad memories from all the from that series and everything is gonna get brought back up. It's perfectly set up for a team to like capture the Hearts of America and then the Lakers to basically have us relive the worst moment in King's history.

Playoff James Harden is dead

My take of playoff James Harden is dead, died last night cuz he was so bad. I was so excited after Saturday and then last night, I mean he like didn't even belong on the court.

The NBA should 'cancel charges' and abolish the charging foul because stepping in front of a player while covering your nuts is not a real defensive move

we came to the conclusion that they should cancel charges if you step in front of a guy and put your hands in front of your nuts... for two reasons. One, that's not a defense, it's not a defensive move. You can't make a defensive play if your hands are covering your balls. And also you should be willing to get hit in the nuts to take a charge. That should be part of the price that you pay.

The Celtics will destroy the 76ers in a sweep or five games

I'm just ready to destroy Philly. They're B ball. Paul, I can't wait for you to like, wait, wait, he's not gonna play. He's gonna score zero points. Celtics are probably gonna win in a sweep five.

If Robert Williams stays healthy, the Celtics will win the championship

Robert Williams is playing like he's healthy, active. It's always scary with him... if he stays healthy, good things are coming.

Soul patches are making a huge comeback this summer

I think the soul patch is the right move. I think soul patches are making a huge comeback. I think one of you guys should lead the charge on that... it's gonna be Soul patch summer.

Russell Westbrook is officially back

As far as, as far as Westbrook goes... Russ Russel Westbrook officially back. I'm sure he's gonna be very consistent with this throughout the rest of this playoff series too.

Adrian Peterson will sign with the Indianapolis Colts in 2023

I fully expect Adrian Peterson to be on the Colts next year. Which makes so much sense. Like I could see it in my head him backing up Jonathan Taylor and just being like, fuck this, why aren't I getting my carries?

AI robots will take over and kill everyone within a month

I'm fully convinced, I figured I should just get it on record that probably within like a month, AI is going to build robots, take over the world and we're all gonna die.

Pregnant people need to stop using weeks and start talking in months because nobody knows how far along 22 weeks is

My biggest problem with this was that he said 22 weeks and then I had to sit down and break down how pregnant that was my brain by doing math. That's what pissed me off. Just say months... I'm confused again. Four and a half, five months pregnant. That's so just be normal pregnant people. I'm begging you be just talk to me in months. Yes. I don't get weeks.

If the Washington Commanders are sold to the Kingdom of Saudi Arabia, I will become an unapologetic Saudi guy and MBS stan

If it gets sold to the kingdom of Saudi Arabia, I just gotta, I think I have no choice. But then to become, I gotta switch over... I'm a Saudi guy for life. I've already got, I've got the whole get up... I think I just have to become unapologetically a live tour guy and whatever F1 crew that he sponsors and then just full-blooded commanders fan and just, just accept the fact that I've been beaten.

Malik Murphy is the real sleeper in the Texas QB battle and has the best arm on the team

In reality in the UT quarterback competition, there was a big dark horse sleeper that no one saw coming in Malik Murphy... I think has the best arm out of any of the quarterbacks on the team. Quinn Ewers did have an amazing day... but this Malik Murphy guy just was throwing bombs out there.

Canadians run funny because they skate from such a young age and don't look like athletes when they are off the ice

The chaos are a team of Canadians and what's really funny is they all run funny because they're all Canadians and Canadians all run funny cuz they all played hockey. Yeah. So you see them trotting around. This is true... hockey development from skating from such a young age and they don't run. Right. This is true. I've never seen hockey players like play pickup basketball... they don't even look like they athlete off the ice.

The 76ers will win the NBA championship this year

The second I sold, I went out and said the Sixers are winning the championship this year. I fully believe that's happening. I think it was my sale of the ownership that motivated everybody to play that much harder.

I have 'closed, closed' the door on future sports ownership because it would get in the way of Fanatics' success

are you closing the door on sports ownership going forward?... Closed. Closed. You're closed, closed. Look, here's the reality... I have so much to do to improve in everything that we do... for me, the opportunity to build fanatics into one of the most valuable companies in the world... I don't want anything to get in the way of that. And sports ownership would be in the way that.

Josh Harris will successfully buy the Washington Commanders

I believe that Josh will get this done. That's my prediction. I believe that Josh will get this done... and I'm rooting for him. He grew up in Washington. I think he'll be a really good owner of that team.

The Buffalo Bills winning a Super Bowl would be the biggest merchandise market for Fanatics

What you generally look for is teams with great heritage that haven't won for a long time. The Buffalo Bills would be spectacular for business. Because they have great heritage... think about everyone who grew up in Buffalo who has any connectivity in Buffalo. Every one of them would buy $500 in merchandise.

There is zero chance I will ever retire or slow down because retirement is basically saying you want to die

Zero, zero, zero chance of ever retiring. Zero chance of ever slowing down. I fucking love this. I have a blast... I really believe this and I've seen it happen time after time. I think retirement is basically, you're saying you wanna die. And I think, you know, for me, for someone like me, I retire, I might as well just say I want to like, I'm gonna be dead because my brain works with activity.

There should be a maximum age of 65 for the US Presidency

I firmly believe this. If there's one rule that should be put in place right now... there needs to be an age max. You cannot be president past 65 for the first term... you'd have sharper people that could be more aggressive. I want the leader of our country to be a great leader but be able to really affect change.

Austin Reaves is the true alpha on the Lakers

But the real story outta that game was Austin Reaves. Yeah. Austin Reaves. AKA him. He is him.

Spencer Dinwiddie's career might be over after being nicknamed 'Dinshiddie'

This was his first game since Kyle Kuzma called him Dinshiddie, which is a great, great nickname... and he wasn't good... I don't wanna overstate it, but when you get called Dinshiddie, it might be a wrap.

The replacement of Sierra Mist with Starry is a handout to 'Big Corn'

This does feel like a Biden special... This is a big handout to Big corn. Yeah. To the corn syrup market. Because Sierra Mist was made with real sugar while Starry uses high fructose corn syrup.

The Kings winning Game 1 counts as a tournament win for John Calipari because De'Aaron Fox and Malik Monk both scored 30+

Does this count as a tournament win for Cal? Absolutely. Because De'Aaron Fox and Malik Monk, both in their playoff debut, go for over 30... I think Cal should be like, update the record books. The Kings beat the Warriors game one with two of my guys.

The 'pervert' chant at Max Homa is officially canceled and banned

We have to stop saying to Max Homa on the golf course that he's a pervert because it's getting a little weird... permission to shame that person, take a picture and send it to us... no more pervert. That is officially canceled.

The MLB pitch clock makes fans feel rushed and ruins the 'fuck around' time at the stadium

I fucking hate the pitch clock... because I sit down there... I'm trying to chit chat, socialize like how I usually do... I feel like I'm rushed at a table, at a restaurant that's trying to flip table. I want there to be more fuck around time. So if I get food, I don't miss anything.

If you attend a game in person, the MLB pitch clock is bad because you want that time to never stop

I agree with this take for games that you attend in person... when I go to the ballpark and I watch a daytime baseball game, I want that time to never stop... Take me out to the ballgame, it doesn't say I care if I never get back. I want to be able to be unaccounted for the whole day.

If the Bruins don't win the Stanley Cup, it's a complete failure and they'll be a joke

The Bruins are statistically now... most wins in a NHL season... if they don't win the cup, they're kind of like a joke a little bit... it's win or a complete failure.

The winner of the Rangers-Devils series will play the Bruins in the Eastern Conference Final

Rangers Devils winner, I think goes on and plays the Bruins in the Eastern Conference final.

The best value bet for the NHL playoffs is Igor Shesterkin to win the Conn Smythe

If you like the Rangers... the only way they're gonna win the Stanley Cup is if [Shesterkin] stands on his head, you take him Conn Smythe plus 2300. That's a good card. I like that.

I'm a 'belief' this year: the Maple Leafs will win the Stanley Cup

I'm a belief this year... I took the Leafs to win the Stanley Cup. I believe in the Leafs.

If Connor McDavid doesn't win the Stanley Cup this year, he is a 'bum'

My big bet is gonna be on the Oilers... because I'm sick of you telling me how Connor McDavid's the best athlete in all of sports... this is a personal one-on-one legacy match... If he doesn't win the cup this year, he is a bum.

The winner of the Oilers-Kings series will reach the Stanley Cup Final

I said today on Chiclets that the winner of that series is gonna go to the cup final. Ooh. And LA right now... they're 25 to one... but the winner of that series goes to the cup final.