Takes

Jim Irsay was the first NFL owner with the 'balls' to stand up to Dan Snyder

I will never forget the fact that he is the first owner to have the balls to say fuck you to Dan Snyder when Snyder threatened to blackmail every other owner. And he goes, yeah, try me. 'cause everything that I've done is out in the open.

The NFL should not change the playoff format to strip division winners of home games

NFL might change the playoff format where division winners get an automatic entry but not necessarily home field in the first round. This would suck. NFL is what makes the NFL great. Winning your division should mean a lot. Don't overreact to one year.

I will cut off the tip of my pinky if the Falcons win the Super Bowl

Falcons are not winning the Super Bowl. Guaranteed. Falcons are not winning the Super Bowl. That's, I I believe it end the season. Tip of the pinky. If the Falcons somehow win this game on Monday night, I have to also have the Rams.

Spring football (UFL) will never be relevant because the sports calendar is too crowded

I'm, I've never been more confident in my take that spring football. I just don't care. I, I feel very good about that because I've, every, every few years they try to pop one up and be like, you should care. I respect the sports calendar more than anything. This is March Madness. This is gonna be masters. This is gonna be NBA and NHL playoffs. Football is king. I love football more than anything, but not spring football.

Jayden Daniels should and will win the Heisman

Jayden Daniels. Eight touchdowns... against Georgia State... He is now the favorite to win the Heisman... I don't think that you can honestly make a case that it should be anybody except for Jayden Daniels.

Jim Harbaugh will leave Michigan for the NFL after this season

I think that him accepting his punishment is a sign. He might be on the outs, which I'm excited for. Except he might go to the Chargers, which I'm not excited for.

The Texans offense will be much better than people think this year

He's [John Metchie] back in training camp. He looks awesome. ... I'm just saying, I think, I think the Texans on offense this year are gonna be way better than we think. I like Stroud. How do you do that? I'm a Stroud boy.

Mike McCarthy taking over play-calling is the beginning of the end for his time in Dallas

Mike McCarthy is saying that he's going to now take on play calling rules. So this is awesome. ... It's also just, it's the beginning of the end. And if it's because when you get this job, they're basically saying, now you have to fucking do this. Yes. And you're gonna, so it's, it is shuffling the, the deck chairs on the Titanic.

Zach Wilson is officially cleared and the Jets will beat the Steelers

My 'who's back' is Zach Wilson. He's officially back and cleared to play next week against Pittsburgh... a game we can win... Sola said after in the press conference. I broke the fucking news. If anyone else tries to say they broke the news on Sunday... Billy football had it 1:00 AM Monday morning. Facts.

Football is back because the Patriots announced their red throwback jerseys

I saw the Patriots put out that they're gonna come and wear their red throwback jerseys this year. And that was the first time I was like, I think football's back.

Dan Snyder's financial theft from other owners will be what finally forces him to sell the team

Dan Snyder... Apparently Snyder was lying about how much money he was getting into his gate. So he was actively stealing from the other owners... if you steal a million dollars from Jed York, they want to kill you. And so it looks like if anything's going to happen, this would be what could bring Dan Snyder down.

Malik Willis threw the ball 73.72 yards at the NFL Combine

Doing some Pythagoras theorem on Malik Willis' absolute gigantic throw. So he threw it 60 yards down the field. But if you [calculate] the hypotenuse of how actually far you threw in a straight line, it got out to 73.72.

Mike McDaniel will save Tua Tagovailoa's career

Dolphins hired a new head coach, Mike McDaniel. Watch that clip of his, he seems very media friendly guy, big personality. He's going to save Tua [Tagovailoa].

Any head coach the Bears hire will fail because the organization is broken

I've come to a bad realization with it—with my wisdom in life—is that it's not the coach. It's the organization. Like whoever gets hired is going to fail because the organization will fail them... 90% chance will fail because the Bears are broken, terrible organization.

Urban Meyer is trying to recreate his Florida Gators teams by moving Travis Etienne to wide receiver.

Urban Meyer is just that report that Travis Etienne is taking reps as only a wide receiver... He's trying to create Percy Harvin. I understand what he's doing, I think... He just wants to recreate the Florida team.

NFL wide receivers wearing single-digit numbers is a 'there goes the neighborhood' moment

The NFL is just, I guess, giving clearance to wide receivers to wear single-digit numbers... It's a major There Goes the Neighborhood moment. I think it's going to happen. Peter King leaked it out, and when Peter King has a scoop like that, it's Roger Goodell just being like, Peter, you are my trial balloon.

Mike Glennon is the perfect quarterback for people to use in Kaepernick comparison tweets

Every year we have to have at least one quarterback that's the perfect person for half of Twitter to quote tweet and be like Colin Kaepernick isn't on an NFL team but this person. Yes, Mike Glennon is like the perfect person to focus our attention on there.

Leaked Wonderlic scores are a smokescreen designed to hurt Tua Tagovailoa's draft stock

They were also incorrect leaked Wonderlic scores all that which tells me it's smokescreen season for someone out there. Like someone wants the rest of the NFL to believe that Tua is dumb because they gave Tua a 13 in the first Wonderlic score. It's not true at all. That's not what he got.

I am officially back on the Tua Tagovailoa train now that the lefty witchcraft is gone

Watching [Tua Tagovailoa] throw with an NFL ball looks good. Like the witchcraft is gone or whatever... I think it goes from looking like it's spinning clockwise to looking like it's spinning counterclockwise now that it has the stripes off. So I'm fully on board the Tua train.

Urban Meyer will definitely coach football again

My who's back is Urban Meyer because Urban Meyer said he misses football. Oh, you think? That actually could just be that because he's definitely going to coach. So shout out all the people who said that he actually was retiring for real this time. You're an idiot.

The Derek Carr media hype machine is funny because we know he isn't a superstar

The Derek Carr media hype machine that's trying to get behind a guy who we really know who he is, and that's not a terrible quarterback, but he's not a superstar quarterback, is very, very funny to me. Because they're basically trying to wheel themselves into Derek Carr as our starter.

Joe Flacco is statistically the worst starting quarterback of the last five years

Does John Elway realize that Joe Flacco statistically in the last five years is the worst starting quarterback you could have?

Adam Gase is the most paranoid person in the world and hiring him is a massive mistake

One other high-level evaluator with a different team said that this is the biggest mistake anyone in the NFL has made in years. Gase is crazy. He's the most paranoid person in the world. This will be like Todd Haley on crack.

Ryan Fitzpatrick is the perfect Dolphins quarterback because he provides 'Fitzmagic' wins during a rebuild

I don't think there's been a more perfect move in the history of the NFL than Ryan Fitzpatrick going to the Dolphins... Ryan Fitzpatrick is like the perfect, we can rebuild, but he'll give us four or five wins that will be awesome to watch so people don't get so pissed off about the team sucking.

Tom Brady is a prisoner of his own success because of his extreme superstitions

Tom Brady's success is so successful and won so many Super Bowls, how many little things like this do you think he does in a day-to-day basis where he's like, well, it's helped me get to where I'm at? He's basically stuck in the most superstitious life of all time... He's permanently stuck upside down because he keeps winning Super Bowls... He's a prisoner of his own success.

The Bears will be in first place in the NFC North (for now)

The Bears are back. They're number one. NFC North. Just saying. I don't know if we'll hold on to it for very long, but you have to enjoy the small steps, okay?

Aaron Rodgers is surly, malcontent, and uncoachable

They hate each other. They always have hated each other. It's great to watch. Aaron Rodgers, surly, malcontent, uncoachable.

The Cleveland Browns will win seven games this year

I have something very brave to say. I think the Cleveland Browns are going to win seven games this year.

Scouts will reasonably drop Shaquem Griffin in the draft because he only has one hand

I can't wait for people to get mad when he falls in the draft a little bit. Look, I think he's a good player, and he did well at the Combine, but he does not have one hand. So, like, I think... That's a fair criticism to throw out there. That doesn't mean that he's not going to be a good NFL player, but I think most scouts would probably say, I'd prefer two hands than one.

Blake Bortles is officially back

So my who's back of the week is Blake Bortles of the Blake Bortles Wikipedia Club. Huge game. Four touchdowns. He's back.

Blake Bortles is the Jaguars' QB1 for the 2017 season

Blake Bortles is back... he is QB1 for the season. All you haters out there. Blake Bortles, QB1, Jacksonville Jaguars. Write it down.

The CFL is the perfect place for Johnny Manziel to start a comeback

Johnny Manziel is back. He has reportedly had a tryout with the CFL, which the CFL is exactly where Johnny Manziel needs to start his comeback.

The Texans playing the first wildcard game on Saturday is an annual tradition like no other

The Texans are playing the first wildcard game on Saturday that everyone's going to hate and always features really bad quarterback play. Tradition like any other.

Aaron Rodgers is officially back and the Packers are the team nobody wants to play in January

[Aaron Rodgers] did his whole thing where everyone talked about how [he] was awful, and then he's rattled off three games that have been great, and the Packers are right back in the thick of things, and they are officially the don't-want-to-play-these-guys-in-January team.

The Detroit Lions are in trouble because Matthew Stafford's finger injury is a season-killer

The Lions are back because something really good happened to them today, and they're in the catbird seat of the NFC North. But then in a win, they also got really bad news as Matthew Stafford dislocated his middle finger on his throwing hand and severed a bunch of ligaments. So they're kind of fucked.

Every NFL team that passed on Dak Prescott will be draft shamed forever

Dak Prescott has been named the starter. He was drafted 135... You could have had Dak Prescott. And people will remind you every single day... Everyone gets draft shamed now that Dak Prescott is officially the starter and a superstar.

The Raiders are officially back.

The Raiders. The Raiders are officially back. And it's fun. The Raiders are like Notre Dame or maybe even the Yankees where everything's more fun when they're back.

The Raiders are officially back as the 'Bad Boy' team of the NFL

I have the Bad Boy Raiders are back. The team of the 70s. Silver and black... They set a record for most penalties in a game... Al Davis bad boys are in town.

Jeff Fisher will lose his next two games because the Rams are in L.A.

Jeff Fisher is losing his next two games now that the Rams are in L.A. Hollywood Jeff is going to be reading the dailies. He's going to see his name and variety. And he's like 3-1, 3-1. I know another team from Golden State that was 3-1 not too long ago.