Takes

Jimmy Butler is a top 15 player in the NBA

Jimmy Butler, top 15 player in the NBA. Okay. Just like I have always said. Top 15 player. That was voted upon by the journalists.

Lonzo Ball is going to the Los Angeles Lakers

Lonzo Ball is going to the Los Angeles Lakers.

The San Antonio Spurs are dead

And the San Antonio Spurs are dead. Dead. D-E-D. A-D. Dead. Manslaughtered, as Greg Popovich would say.

The Celtics are obviously going to lose the series to the Cavaliers

We're obviously going to lose the series. That's a fact. I mean, Isaiah [Thomas], he got worked by the Washington guards. He's going to get worked by Kyrie [Irving].

James Harden will definitely need PR 101 assistance again in the future

First up, we have a little PR 101 for James Harden, who I'm going to call my shot here. I think this isn't the last time we're going to have to do PR 101 for James Harden.

The Spurs always successfully find the right veterans to fit their system

Actually, [the Spurs] are a team that just it's like a revolving door of talent. They always bring in the right pieces and the right guys to fit the system. And no matter how old or you might think they are, they might be getting guys that are on the tail end of their careers are still able to do and play at a high level.

I know every NBA referee by name to build rapport and avoid technicals

I talk to all of them. Know them all by name... Go up to them before the game, say what's up.

I am not confident about the Celtics playing the Cavaliers in the Eastern Conference Finals

I'm not really going to act like I'm super confident about playing the Cavs.

The Cavaliers and Warriors will meet in the 2017 NBA Finals

I think the Cavs and Warriors are going to play each other in the NBA Finals.

The San Antonio Spurs are a tougher matchup for the Warriors than the Houston Rockets

I can't not put my money on the Spurs. They're just like that team that always finds a way to get wins. Not saying they're going to win, but to get a win for sure, I think I'd have to go Spurs.

Lonzo Ball will have a target on his back in the NBA because of LeVar Ball

Anybody that gets hyped up that much, if you're the number one pick or your top pick that's doing a lot of talking, you're going to have a little bit of a target on your back for sure... there's like that extra unneeded motivation that other guys will have now.

The Eastern Conference is hilariously weak

The Eastern Conference is so hilarious. I don't want to say that it's a weak conference overall. [But] it kind of is. It always seems the teams that LeBron gets to play in the first two rounds are always those red teams... and they're the easiest teams in the world to sweep through.

The Raptors are a joke of a franchise

I got a little heat back from my take the other day that the Raptors are just a joke of a franchise. I don't mean it in a mean way. It's just facts are facts. When you think of the Raptors, you think of Vince Carter winning a dunk title and then getting swept.

The Cavaliers are going to sweep the Raptors

The Cavs are going to sweep the Raptors. Get us to the conference final. Get us to the finals.

The Raptors have a 7% chance to beat the Cavaliers

I think they're going to muddy it up... Two over five. Seven percent chance.

Greg Popovich will complain about James Harden flopping during their series

Pop is going to complain about James Harden flopping at some point in the series in his very Pop way... about how James Harden kind of jumps into defenders when shooting threes.

The Clippers must blow up their current core

Can we just be done with the Clippers as they currently are constructed? I don't know how they're going to blame it on Blake Griffin, but I'm sure they will. Doc Rivers, just stop. Just get out of here. Don't coach anymore. Chris Paul, go find another team.

If Rajon Rondo is the linchpin of the Bulls season, that is a big problem

I even hate even more is people saying, oh, well, if Rondo was still in this series, the Bulls win. Yeah, probably right. But if Rajon Rondo is like the linchpin for your whole fucking season, that's a big fucking problem.

Jeff Teague has been swept out of the playoffs by LeBron James for three consecutive years

I'm pretty sure Jeff Teague has been swept by LeBron three years in a row. That's amazing.

If the Celtics win the next game handily, they will win the series against the Bulls

I think if [the Celtics] can win the next game handily, they can win the series.

The NBA playoffs are predictable and the first round is a joke

I mean, the only thing I don't like about basketball is just like it's pretty predictable who's going to the conference final. It's never really a surprise. So it's just the first round's a joke. Does anyone even pay attention until the conference finals?

Paul George's rivalry with LeBron James is completely manufactured

All rivalries pale in comparison to the Paul George-LeBron James rivalry. ... Paul George said that his rivalry with LeBron James is for the culture. ... a crazy rivalry that I don't think anyone including LeBron James knew existed. ... it's kind of like what we're doing with that snowflake cuck Mark Cuban just creating a rivalry out of nowhere.

The 2017 Cavaliers stunk in the regular season and look like the Heat team that lost the Finals in five games

This is not a very good team the way they've played down the stretch run. They are no longer the number one seed in their conference... it kind of feels like [LeBron's last year in Miami] is a scenario we could wind up this year, too.

James Harden has perfected the ability to get fouled whenever he wants

James has this unique ability to actually get fouled whenever he wants. It's unbelievable. He's asking for it. I don't know how he does it, but he has perfected it. ... If we're playing situational games in practice... I'll stick my arm out and he'll run through it and he can stop and start so quick... he does look for his little angles in practice to perfect it in a game.

The Wizards are going to win their series against the Hawks easily

John Wall is really good at basketball... He's very good. The Wizards are going to win easily.

The San Antonio Spurs are the most impressive franchise in American sports history

The Spurs are the most impressive franchise in the history of American professional sports, right? They've been good for, like, 25 of the last 26 years.

Russell Westbrook is the obvious choice for NBA MVP

To me, Westbrook is the kind of obvious answer, I guess. And Harden is the second most obvious answer... Leonard seems like it's overthinking it a little bit.

I would still take the Cavaliers to win the East over the Celtics, Raptors, or Wizards, even though my model ranks them lower

My brain says LeBron is unbelievable every spring. ... No, I would take the Cavs out of that bunch [Celtics, Raptors, Wizards], obviously. ... I would take the Cavs out of that bunch, obviously.

Golden State is better with Kevin Durant than without him

So you think that they're better with Kevin Durant? Yeah, for sure. I mean, I think they were better this year than they were.

Phil Jackson is actively trying to get fired by the Knicks to get a settlement

Phil Jackson is actively just trying to screw up as much as he can on purpose... Everything that you thought that Phil could do to try to get fired and get a big settlement, he has done it.

The Bulls will give the Celtics a good series in the first round

I think the Bulls are going to give the Celtics a really good series.

The Clippers are officially in America's 'friend zone'

Here's the thing about the Clippers. They're not a threat to do anything. They're in the friend zone. They're in America's friend zone... I'm totally comfortable with them taking me home on a late night and walking me back. I know it's going to be a hug and I'm going to go into my house.

No team besides the Spurs, Warriors, or Cavaliers has a real chance to win the NBA title this year

Can you give us a team, not named the Spurs, Warriors, or Cavs, that can win the NBA title this year? [Ernie]: No.

The Cavaliers will win the Eastern Conference.

So they're [the Cavs] going to win the East. ... It's every single year this happens. Whatever team LeBron's on, they have a little swoon and everyone's like, uh-oh, hit the panic button. ... And then they'll win the East.

LeVar Ball is currently the 'straw that stirs the drink' for NBA media

LeVar Ball is the straw that stirs the drink. Of NBA media right now... parents are now the content engines.

Lonzo Ball's shooting form will get stuffed to the rafters in the NBA

I'm liking that left ear release. It's going to get stuffed to the rafters in the NBA, but I love it. It's going to be great to watch, though. At first, when I'd watch [Lonzo Ball] shoot, I'd be like, that's like watching Jim Furyk swing a golf club. No way can this guy be good.

Russell Westbrook has the best stats in the NBA, but his team is not good

Russell Westbrook, who by far has the best stats, but his team is not good. Is he just the guy that's always the best player in the league and has been for the last 10 years? [LeBron James].

Lavar Ball is just the basketball version of Kris Jenner

That Lavar Ball is just the basketball Kris Jenner. I don't know what that means, but I'm into it. He is basically going to market his sons so relentlessly and throw them in our face.

Kevin Durant likely won't lose his shooting rhythm despite his injury

He actually has a history of coming back from injury pretty well... he doesn't seem to lose his shooting rhythm. The thing that's a question mark... is that if he is 5%, 10% off, that's where you could see a big turn... it just wrecks all their form.

The Chicago Bulls front office has no clear vision

They just haven't had a clear vision, right? ... If they had decided we're going to rebuild, rebuild. If they decided we're going to build around Jimmy Butler, build around Jimmy Butler. Stop dangling his name in trade talks.

The Bulls will beat the Warriors on TNT and then lose to a shitty team

They're going to beat the Warriors tonight. It's a home game on TNT on a Thursday night. The Bulls will beat the Warriors, and I will say the Bulls are back, and that will happen. And that happens every single, like, every three weeks, and then they lose to some shitty-ass team.

Lonzo Ball won't fall in the draft because of his father's quotes

I don't think so. ... If you're a pro team, I think it's pretty easy to step away from that and not have that be a big factor. I don't think anyone would pass on talent if they feel like if they believe in him for the roster.

Jaleel Okafor is the new king of not caring about defense

Jaleel Okafor is now the true I don't care about defense guy. ... He just took like three steps back and he's standing perfectly still. ... Didn't put a hand up. Didn't really move for a rebound.

John Wall and DeMarcus Cousins will eventually play together in the NBA

I actually think there's a decent – I think [John Wall] and [DeMarcus Cousins] will play together before they're done. They've been saying that for years.

The Bulls front office members Gar Forman and John Paxson are morons for their trade deadline approach

The Bulls, my Bulls made a trade, and they're morons per usual. They're doing the old, we're trying to rebuild on the fly, which has never worked... Doug McDermott and Taj Gibson to the Thunder is not a Woj bomb. That's just a guard and Pax are fucking morons.

Jimmy Butler is an incredible bargain because he signed his max contract before the salary cap spiked

I dropped Jimmy Butler contract truth, because Jimmy Butler is actually a great deal. He signed the max contract before the new salary cap, so he's going to be cheap for the next three years.

Carmelo Anthony will likely stay in New York because no other team wants him

Do you think that Melo is going to be staying put in New York for the rest of the season, or do you think he's moving? [Big Cat]: I think he's probably staying put because no one wants him on his team, unless they're trying to win an All-Star game or an Olympic.

LeBron James is a coward for not participating in the NBA Dunk Contest

LeBron James that's not in the dunk contest again. Kind of a coward move. Michael Jordan was in the dunk contest. Back in the day, you had your best athletes in it. Vince Carter. You had your Vinces, your J.R. Smiths. You had everybody.

The Houston Rockets got 100 times better simply by letting Dwight Howard leave

I went Dwight Howard. Like, he just left, and [the Rockets] got 100 times better. Addition by subtraction. I love it.

Joel Embiid will stop being funny on Twitter when he starts playing poorly or getting hurt more

I predicted like a month ago how Joel would not be so funny on Twitter when he starts fucking up. So this is the first one. He's injured like every other day. He's got a lot of time to go back and forth. Take away his umlaut over the Joel. You're just Joel now.