Takes

The Redskins will win the NFC East

Now I want to point out that Mike Tanyer... ran a simulation of the rest of the season... And the R-Words still won the division. So don't jump the gun on the Eagles just yet. Now I'm 100% back in on the R-Words train after learning about the simulation.

Adam Thielen will have 147 yards and two touchdowns against the Lions

To me, this feels like an easy Vikings win. And it feels like Adam Thielen putting up like 147 yards, two touchdowns... I'm Thielen 13 targets, 9 catches.

The Houston Texans are a legitimate Super Bowl contender

I've talked myself into the Texans are a legitimate Super Bowl contender.

The Redskins will finish the season with at least 10 wins

The bottom line is the R-words [Redskins] are going to go 10-6 minimum. Maybe 11-5.

The Lions are not sure they're bad and could win their division

I actually think the Lions could be okay. They could win that division, you think? Are we sure they're good? We're not sure they're bad.

The Chiefs will have a come-down-to-earth game against the Bengals

I think this is going to be the week where everything comes back down to earth. It's a little bit sloppy. They might lose, but they're probably going to be within the record.

The Dallas Mavericks will win over 34.5 games because they hired Haralabos Voulgaris

I've got my over at the Dallas Mavericks. I'm taking the over on 34 and a half. Dirk I think is out for a little bit... I'm going on this based solely on the fact that they hired that guy [Haralabos Voulgaris] who's a really good gambler to run their analytics department. If you can beat Vegas, then you can beat the Clippers.

The 2018 NFC Championship will be Bears vs. Rams

It's going to be Rams, Bears, and the NFC Championship game. And the Bears are probably going to beat them with that physical defense.

The 2018 Super Bowl will be Bears vs. Patriots

It's going to be Bears-Patriots in the Super Bowl.

The Chiefs will beat the Patriots outright in Week 6

Chiefs and Patriots, it's going to be awesome. We'll see if Mahomes is for real... I think the Chiefs win this one outright. I do.

The Jaguars vs. Cowboys game will go under 40.5 points

The under that I love, love, love this week is the Jags-Cowboys, under 40 and a half, because the Cowboys can't score, and the Jags have a good defense.

Ben Roethlisberger is 'officially fully broken'

I don't know if we could say Ben [Roethlisberger] at home is a good quarterback right now. He's just, he's broken. He's broken. He is finally officially fully broken. It happened. Ben is broken.

The Jaguars vs. Chiefs Week 5 game is when Patrick Mahomes finally 'comes back down to earth'

The game of the week is easy... the Jaguars versus the Chiefs. Defense versus offense. Mahomes—this is the game that he comes back down to earth.

The Eagles (-3) will beat the Vikings because I think Minnesota stinks

I got Eagles minus three. I think the Vikings stink.

Buffalo is an even worse team than everyone already thought

Buffalo's not as bad as we thought that they were. I think they might be worse than we thought that they were. And they lost Marshall Newhouse, too, so that's a big factor there.

The Texans' season is over if they lose to the Giants

This is officially if the thing is, I'm pretty sure the Giants are terrible. And if the Texans lose to a terrible team, their season's over.

The Colts and Redskins game will be a shootout

Alex Smith like that's a perfect Jay Gruden's offense perfect he's just gonna dump it down dump it down maybe a couple shots deep every now and then I like the over I think it's gonna be a shootout.

Eli Manning always plays well in Dallas

Doesn't it feel like every time that Eli [Manning] goes to Dallas... I feel like Eli Manning always plays well in Dallas, and I feel like the Sunday night game is when he has, like, the buzz.

The Bengals will be a good value this year

I'm also buying the Bengals this year. I think this is the perfect year for the Bengals to get Marvin Lewis another seven years. Joe Mixon, John Ross, A.J. Green, I actually think they're going to score points.

I am not a Patrick Mahomes guy

I want to be on the record that I am not a Mahomes guy. Okay. Put me on the record. Put me in the history books.

The US will win the 2018 World Cup

I'm going with the U.S... They could still come back. You never count the U.S. out until they're totally out.

Uruguay will win the 2018 World Cup

I'll take Uruguay. Luis Suarez. I actually put a little money on that, so we'll see how that goes.

The Bucks might sweep the Celtics in the first round

Bucks are maybe even going to sweep the Celtics.

Josh Allen will be the number one overall pick in the 2018 NFL Draft

We now have a place for all you Josh Allen fans out there to learn more about Josh Allen at draftjoshallen.com. I, for one, feel bullish about where we're going with this website... [Mel Kiper] putting Josh Allen at number one on his big board. Twice, though.

Josh Allen will be out of the NFL by 2020

My number one overall pick in the XFL draft is Josh Allen. Quarterback Wyoming... And he won't be in the league [NFL] by 2020.

The Patriots are a bigger lock this week than they were last week and they'll hit the Over

I'm going to take the Patriots. I'm going to say that they're more of a lock this week than they were last week... I would take the over. I probably won't, but I'm just going to load up on the Patriots.

The Vikings will win the NFC Championship but the game will go Under

I'm going to take the Vikings, but I'm going to take the under. I like Philly's defense, I think, a little bit more than you.

Lock of the Week: Jaguars -4.5 vs 49ers

I have the Jags. Blake Bortles. [The spread] is four and a half, by the way. Minus four and a half.

The Packers will beat the Browns by double digits in Week 14

I think this is prime. Oh, wow. You want to put a lock on it? Yeah. It is now. ... I'm going to take the Packers. This is where they start their run, and they're going to piss everybody off, and then they're going to win a playoff game.

The Browns will beat the Packers in Week 14

I'm going to lock back on you. I'm going to take the Browns. ... Oh, fuck. Your last name's Lockwood. That makes your locks. Double lock. ... I'm locked up. All you listeners out there, go with Hank.

The Chiefs are a lock to cover -10.5 against the Giants because Andy Reid never loses coming off a bye

I am taking the Chiefs. Minus 10.5 on the road against the Giants. ... Anytime you have the opportunity to bet on a 10.5-point road favorite, you have to take it. ... Also, Andy Reid coming off of a bye week. We all know about that. Always wins. Always wins big.

The Packers will run Brett Hundley 45 times on RPOs against the Bears

The Packers ran one RPO where Brett Hundley kept the ball and ran on Monday Night Football, and it worked for like 10 yards. They're going to do that like 45 times. And they're going to be like, oh, Brett Hundley can run a little, so we'll just run the ball.

I'm taking the Giants +3.5 at home against the Rams

I'm taking the Giants at home, plus three and a half against our man's Jared Goff. This is just one of those situations where you take the worst team you can find if they're home dogs.

I'm taking the Broncos +8 on the road against the Eagles

I'm going with the Denver Broncos. Plus eight in Philadelphia. That's one of those games where you just look at it and you're like, this is the dumbest pick ever, so that's why it might win.

The Chargers' game against New England is a trap game for the Patriots

I'm going with the Chargers... on the road against New England. This is a trap game for New England. I don't really know what trap game means, but when you say it's a trap game, you sound smart.

I'm taking the Packers +4.5 at home against the Saints

I'm taking the Packers. Ooh, okay, I like that. Plus four and a half at home. Everyone loves the Saints. The Saints... Be careful, my friends.

Instant replay should be abolished in sports

I think we should actually get rid of instant replay. All together, just give it all the power back to the refs and the umps... I feel like I watch instant replays more than I watch sports now.

I love the 49ers as +1.5 road dogs against the Colts

My pick, I'm taking the 49ers as Road Dogs plus 1.5 over Indy. That's my team... Love the Niners. Love betting on them. Love Shanahan. Yep. I mostly just love betting against Chuck Pagano in his permanent hot seat.

The Cleveland Browns will win at least two games this season

Could the Browns go two and 14? The Browns could... they could win two games... I'm going to cross my mind on the Will They Win 4 games, but two games? Still could do it.

Lock of the Week: Ravens +3 at home against the Steelers

I'm going to go with the Baltimore Ravens. Home dogs. Plus three. ... If I know Joe Flacco, and I know him pretty well, this is one of the weeks that he comes out and he has like three touchdowns and 320 yards.

Lock of the Week: Jaguars -3 vs. Jets

I'm going to go with the Jaguars. Minus three. In New York. ... I think Blake Bortles, there's no way he can regress. I think he finally took the step forward and he'll never take a step back again.

The Saints will cover the spread (+7) against the Patriots

I have the New Orleans Saints covering at plus seven against the New England Patriots. That's a lot of points to give up at home in the Bayou.

The Bears will cover the spread (+7) against the Buccaneers in the Mike Glennon revenge game

My pick is the Chicago Bears, plus seven. The Mike Glennon revenge game. He's going to Tampa Bay. How can you not?

The Warriors will sweep the Cavaliers in the 2017 NBA Finals

I got Warriors in four.

The Cavaliers will beat the Warriors in seven games in the 2017 NBA Finals

I got Cavs in seven.

The Nationals will win the 2017 World Series

I've got the Nats and the Dodgers [in the NLCS]... and then I'm going with the Red Sox [in the AL]... Red Sox-Nats [World Series]. World Series champion? Nats.

The Cubs will win back-to-back World Series titles

I'm going with the Astros over the Red Sox in the AL and the Cubs over the Mets in the NL... Cubs over the Astros for the World Series.

Miguel Cabrera will win the AL MVP

I think Miguel Cabrera is going to be the AL MVP because he's in that nice spot. He's like 33, maybe getting up there in years, little steroids, getting a little second life.

Bob Huggins will have a heart attack in the finals because of the desert heat

Bob Huggins is going to have a heart attack during the game or at the end of the game. Leave it all out on the court, and they're going to win... And it's in the desert, too. Way too hot for Huggie Bear.

SMU is very good and could go to the Sweet 16, Elite Eight, or even the Final Four

I got two picks for tomorrow for you. URI, Round of Pick'em, and SMU. I love SMU. I've loved SMU all year. I think they're a very good team. I think they could go to the Elite Eight or maybe Sweet 16, or Final Four.