Takes

To win a championship you need a great QB, great defense, and a reliable kicker

I've always thought this. When it comes to winning a championship, you need a great quarterback, a good defense, and a field goal kicker that can make field goals. Or a good quarterback, a great defense, and a field goal kicker that can make field goals.

Winning a championship is about the full season, not one game

As we learned tonight when they raised the championship banner, their fifth one, winning a championship is about the season. It's not about one game. It's about a full season, the playoffs.

The Patriots will finish 12-4 or 11-5 and win the AFC East

I'm going to be honest. I'm going to go out on a limb. I'm going to say the Pats will be 12-4 or 11-5 and win the division.

The 3 to 4 p.m. hour is the greatest single hour in sports television

I call it the greatest single hour in sports television. It's the witching hour... I promise I will refer to it either as the witching hour or the golden hour at some point this season. Just for you guys.

I prematurely predicted a Roger Federer vs. Rafael Nadal US Open semifinal

I think I prematurely said that Roger Federer was going to be in the semifinals with Rafa. Turns out I kind of jumped the gun on that one. Federer lost to a guy named El Chapo... Denis Shapovalov.

The Red Sox Apple Watch scandal is good for baseball because it fuels the Yankees rivalry

Baseball needs rivalries. Red Sox-Yankees has been simmering. This kind of brings it up a notch.

The Super Bowl will feature the Patriots against either the Falcons or the Packers

I'm going Patriots on the AFC. They will play—they're going to play either the Falcons or the Packers.

Roger Federer will beat Rafael Nadal at the US Open

I'm going to go Federer.

Texas can never lose to Maryland in football

[Texas], you can't lose to Maryland in football. No, you can't do it. You can't.

Fall starts when August ends

This is what I consider to be the start of fall. I'm a big September 21st truther. I think that fall starts when August ends.

Matthew Stafford is officially on the hot seat after signing his new contract

I love when a quarterback gets a new deal because they are officially, speaking of hot seat cool throne, they are officially on the hot seat because now it's joke season on Matthew Stafford. We saw it with Joe Flacco. We saw it with Jay Cutler. Matt Stafford has probably a year... and every interception he throws comes a tweet, wow, $86 million for this?

A solo hungover Chinese food order must be at least $75

If you order Chinese food by yourself, by the way, when you're hungover and you are under $75, you're doing it wrong. Because what you need to do when you're hungover and you're ordering Chinese food is you order every single thing that you might just want a little taste of.

Ice cream is the most efficient way to cool your core down during a hangover

I'm going to go with just ice cream because it's so easy. You don't have to worry about chewing it... it cools your core down when you get that hangover where you're dehydrated and you have that lava core. You're sitting on your couch sweating, but if you have the ice cream, it cools you down more efficiently than anything else could.

Avoid betting on big favorites early in the college football and NFL seasons

Stay away from the big favorites. Either take the points or don't bet the game... Don't buy all the hype about the big favorites all the time.

Floyd Mayweather will beat Conor McGregor by decision

I see some betting value on Floyd Mayweather at plus 230 by decision ... I feel pretty convicted that Floyd's not going to knock Conor McGregor out.

Madison Square Garden is the best venue for fights over Las Vegas

Vegas has so many great fights, but, man, there ain't nothing like the Garden, brother. [It is the Mecca].

The Washington Nationals have a 100% chance of making the NLDS

The Nationals are officially Gucci... The Sabermetrics came out, and they have a 100% chance of making the [NLDS]. I don't know how they can calculate that just yet, but I'm not very smart.

Odell Beckham Jr. is the second-best fantasy receiver for 2017 as long as he stays off boats

At the moment, I have Beckham at two [in wide receiver rankings]... As long as he stays off boats... He saves it for the postseason, which we don't care about in fantasy.

Pumpkin Spice is officially back because stores are already displaying it in August.

My first who's back of the week is Pumpkin Spice. ... Walking to a grocery store, walking to any type of store, you will see ... It's just who's back of the week. And who's back of the week is pumpkin spice.

Ralphie the Buffalo is actually a female

People forget Ralphie's actually a woman. I knew I was right. Ralphie has been called one of the best live mascots in sports, and she is often erroneously labeled male.

Golf is only interesting when Tiger Woods or Phil Mickelson are competing on Sunday

golf is a better sport when tiger's competing on sunday... the ratings were all down... we need Phil or Tiger. Basically, we're going to be saying that forever... I guess just like Spieth and Rory and those, they don't do it for me.

I am five foot eight

[I am] five foot eight. That is definitely... [I'm] definitely not 5'6".

Clark Hunt is a powerful NFL owner that the public doesn't mention enough

Clark Hunt is a very powerful, influential owner that you don't hear mentioned along with the Maras and Krafts and Rooneys. Clark Hunt is the guy that I'm putting in there.

Jeff Fisher won't get another head coaching job but will be a consultant

I could see him being brought in as a consultant, working around a team. I don't know if he's going to get a head coach. I don't know about that.

The Jets will win more than 3.5 games this season

In that particular case, I think I will take the... oh, that's right around there. I'll take the over, barely.

The Jets will win fewer than 3.5 games this season

I'll take the under [3.5 wins] for a buck. Under three and a half wins, and I get to call you P-Boy five times.

Sean McVay is a star and will be in the NFL for a long time

Sean McVay, the rookie head coach, who's a star, who's going to have a long time in this league.

Never trust a football coach who doesn't use a fullback

My next one is going to be never trust a football coach who doesn't use a fullback. What's he trying to hide? That's a good one. You want a guy that's leading for your teammates out there. What is he trying to hide?

Hard Knocks is the official start of football season

Hard Knocks is officially the start of football season. It's also great because they're doing the Bucs this year, and I honestly forget that the Bucs are a team a lot of the times.

Watching Hard Knocks will lead to drafting a bust running back in your fantasy league

It is also the time of year where you watch Hard Knocks and you fall in love with a guy who's catching everything or the backup running back, and then you draft him in your fantasy league, and he sucks. It's called the Chris Polk.

The Detroit Pistons 90s horse logo jersey is one of the worst ever

My number one was the Pistons throwback. Remember when the Pistons changed their logo in the 90s? The green and yellow and red horse. The worst jersey criteria is when the original jersey was great and the original logo was great. They're like, we're just going to make everything weird colors.

The Phoenix Coyotes 90s jersey is the worst of all time

And then my four is probably the worst jersey of all time, the Phoenix Coyotes. You remember that one? That was awful. That was the most disgusting jersey I've ever seen in my life.

Bryce Harper is currently the face of baseball

The face right now you would like to think would be, in my opinion, it's Bryce Harper. Unfortunately, there's not one that you can latch on to... Mike Trout is the football fan face of baseball.

The Dodgers will represent the National League in the 2017 World Series

Right now, I think you have to like the Dodgers and what they're doing. I feel like the Nationals could compete, but we're talking about the ultimate dance here, so I'm going to take the Dodgers from the National League.

People who leave empty shopping carts in parking lots are fundamentally inconsiderate

When I go to a parking lot... can't these people take the empty shopping carts and return them where they got them? I mean, what is the big deal? ... People are so generally inconsiderate.

College football is fundamentally better when Nebraska is a good program

They're the quintessential college football is better when Texas is a good program. You know, it's like Texas. It's Notre Dame and Nebraska is like the third one of those programs. College football is better when Nebraska is good. That's a fact.

Honey Nut Cheerios are the greatest cereal of all time

I've got a great value pick at number two: Honey Nut Cheerios. I think they're the goat. I'm just gonna say that... you forget the bee puts his honey in there for you.

Every reporter should Google themselves once a week

If you're a reporter, if you're a journalist, you have to be able to take the heat as well. Every reporter should Google themselves once a week, I would say. Got to make sure your name's out there. Read all the hate possible.

Aaron Rodgers is the best quarterback in the NFL

Well, I think the obvious one is Aaron Rodgers... [His struggles were because] His wide receivers can't catch the ball. Devontae Adams can't get open. Jordy Nelson couldn't move because he was coming off an ACL tear.

The Nationals have the most potent offense in baseball

Shout out to future hall of famer Dan Haren because on this same podcast on Wednesday he said the nationals have the most potent offense in baseball boom so next day [they hit 8 home runs].

Paxton Lynch will excel in Mike McCoy's offensive system

I have the new offensive system guy. I saw this with Paxton Lynch. Mike McCoy is in Denver now. So Paxton Lynch, he's really going to excel because Mike McCoy will let him play out of the shotgun.

Ryan Tannehill will not be in the MVP conversation

Is this the year that Ryan Tannehill gets to the next level? He's not going to be in the MVP talk. I guarantee you that.

The Tennessee Titans are the 'Dark Horse' team that isn't actually a dark horse

I also have the dark horse team that's not a dark horse team because everyone says it's their dark horse team. The Tennessee Titans. It's the team that just missed the playoffs and has a ton of young talent.

Golf is in good hands with Jordan Spieth as the new face of the sport

Golf is officially on the cool throne because Jordan Spieth, he is now the new face of golf. I don't know if you guys have seen, but golf is in good hands now. We're out of the woods with the post-Tiger Woods era. Jordan Spieth's the guy.

Pitching inside is the safest way to attack Aaron Judge

With those guys, like the big guys like [Aaron Judge], I think keeping the ball inside is safer because if you throw it out over the middle, there's the chance to hit it right back up the middle right at you. So keeping it inside and hope they put it on the ground.

Clayton Kershaw and Max Scherzer are the best pitchers in baseball

Him [Kershaw] and Scherzer are the best ones. [Kershaw] is the best pitcher in baseball. I'm worried about his back, though. This is the third year in a row he's gone on the DL for his back.

Yu Darvish is the best trade target available among top pitchers

I would take Darvish. I like Darvish. He's got great stuff. I know the Dodgers and Cubs are looking at both those guys, but I mean, they're all really good, but I'm a big fan of Yu Darvish. I like his stuff. I know Verlander's got more... control, but I'm a big Darvish guy.

Clayton Kershaw is 'hurt' but not 'injured' and will play through the pain

I'm going to go with hurt because he'll be back. He'll just ignore the pain. ... He has that special like lizard part of his brain that he can just activate where it just blocks all of his pain sensors and he can just get back in there.

Mark Trestman was a smart hiring choice for the Chicago Bears

I said that the Bears thought outside the box when hiring Mark Trestman, and it will pay big dividends as they have one of the smartest coaches in the NFL now.

Wally Szczerbiak and Keith Van Horn were going to be incredible NBA players

I thought that Nick Kaner-Medley, Wally Szczerbiak, Steve Wojciechowski, and Keith Van Horn would all be incredible NBA players.