Takes

I am either going to prison or becoming a billionaire because of Pi Network

Either I'm going to go to jail because this is all illegal, which I don't think it is, or I'm going to make a ton of money. It's speculative value. Either I'm going to go to prison or be a billionaire.

Jalen Johnson is a quitter for opting out of the Duke season

[Jalen Johnson] is a quitter. However, as a Dookie, a diehard Cameron Crazy runs in my blood... If they had a shot, even a chance—they're clearly not going to make the tournament. They're terrible this year. If it was like they were even a bubble team or close to a bubble team and he quit now, it'd be like, alright, fuck this guy forever.

LeBron James could absolutely make an NFL roster

LeBron because he would have been the best two-sport athlete of all time making a NFL roster. I actually believe him. I don't know why anyone would say, oh, LeBron couldn't make an NFL team. No, he absolutely could. Without a doubt.

Trevor Lawrence gives off Paxton Lynch vibes and could be a bust

Trevor Lawrence kind of gives me Paxton Lynch vibes... Your best case scenario with Trevor Lawrence is Tom Brady. Your worst case scenario is Paxton Lynch... His throwing motion reminds me a lot of Paxton Lynch's... they kind of like are built the same.

The only way to sustain Super Bowl runs in the NFL is to funnel money through a quarterback's side business

The only way you can do that [sustain Super Bowl runs] is if your star quarterback has an alleged money laundering operation that's taking place as his company behind the scenes that you can funnel money to instead of spending cap hits on that.

I am 100% confident I could beat up Darren Rovell

Listen, I'm going to beat the shit out of Darren Rovell. If you were to ask me, name one person in the world that I'm confident that I could beat up, it's Darren Rovell. I don't think anybody in the world couldn't kick Darren Rovell's ass.

Darren Rovell should have to delete his Twitter account forever if I beat him in a fight

I will kick his ass. If he agrees to delete his Twitter account, I want to wipe them off the face of the internet. I feel like I am, I'm fighting for not just myself, but everybody that's had to wake up to Darren Rovell, tweeting out a video in 4k of JFK getting his skull blown off.

The Patriots were holding Tom Brady back

You do have to ask if the Patriots were holding [Brady] back, Hank. You get him and Gronk into a system that centers itself around making plays between your quarterback and your tight end, and all of a sudden he's blowing teams out, blowing out one of the best quarterbacks of all time, Patrick Mahomes, in the Super Bowl.

The Vince Lombardi Trophy should be renamed the Tom Brady Trophy

Vince Lombardi only won one. You're so greedy, Hank. It's true. He won one trophy. He won one Vince Lombardi trophy. Tom Brady's won seven. Like, come on. ... It's a crime that the championship trophy isn't named after Tom Brady.

Everyone in their mid-30s should be on steroids/testosterone therapy

I think everyone should use it at our age, for sure. ... Recommended by doctors with a prescription. That's how you should be using it.

Alex Rodriguez is a piece of shit and a liar

A-Rod, you know what I'm talking about, you piece of shit. ... He's a scumbag. I don't like that. He was cheating on Jennifer Lopez. ... I was there when it happened.

OJ Simpson's son committed the murders, not OJ

I don't think OJ did it. ... I think it was his son. ... I saw a TikTok.

The Patriots cheated the Jaguars in the 2017 AFC Championship game

I'm like, Tom, you a fucking cheater. You a cheater... I said, I know what happened. Y'all cheated us.

Blockbuster stock is going to make me a millionaire

Blockbuster, bro. It was one cent when I talked about it last time. It is now seven cents. What? Let's go. I called it. Billy is a Blockbuster millionaire.

I would 100% beat the shit out of Jake Paul in a boxing match

By the way, I'd 100% beat the shit out of Jake Paul. He wouldn't touch me. They'll never fight me because I actually would beat them. They only choose guys they know they can strategically win with reach.

Matt LaFleur's decision to kick a field goal on 4th and goal was the most cowardly move ever

The most cowardice field goal of all time. Matt LaFleur, I do not understand what you're doing. The decision to kick a field goal with two 10 to 15 left, three timeouts down eight on the seven yard line fourth and goal so that you can seemingly go from down one score to down one score... was so beyond.

Todd Bowles is a top 8 coach in the NFL

I'm taking out my take that I retired like three years ago. Todd Bowles, great coach. Todd Bowles, top eight coach in the NFL.

The only way to beat the Chiefs is to assault them with deadly weapons

The only way to beat the Chiefs is to actually assault them all with deadly weapons. Someone needs to die. And until that happens, I don't see how the Bucs beat them.

NBA officials might respect me more if I had a tattoo sleeve

I've thought that [getting tattoos]... from just a respect standpoint, you know, like whether it be officials or the opposition... particularly like in the playoffs, I got targeted a lot on defense. I figured maybe that would happen a little bit less if I had some [tattoos] on me.

One touchdown pass will earn Jameis Winston a $25 million contract next year

I think that one pass made Jameis Winston $25 million next year. I don't know about that much, but it definitely... whoever comes in second with the Deshaun Watson jackpot, they're going to have to pony up some cash.

Matt LaFleur is a better coach than Sean McVay

If LeFleur gets there, gets a two NFC championship games in a row, beats his old master on the way there, I think he might be [better] because McVay got to that Super Bowl on the pass interference call, laid an egg in the Super Bowl.

Nick Saban is the greatest coach to ever coach anything in any sport

Can we say in any sport, Nick Saban is the best coach to ever coach anything?

Tom Brady struggles in night games because he goes to bed too early

Tom Brady... One in six last seven night games. One in six last seven night games, nine touchdowns, eight interceptions. If you don't think this guy goes to sleep at 7 o'clock every night, you're crazy.

Josh Allen is better than Patrick Mahomes right now

Josh Allen... He's legitimately playing the best football right now. So, you know, I'm sure some people – I might take him over almost anybody but Aaron [Rodgers]. I might take him over Mahomes right now in this moment.

Kyle Trask's facial hair proves he is not a franchise quarterback

If you were scouting this crop of quarterbacks, Kyle Trask's facial hair is a huge negative. That is not a franchise quarterback. That is a long reliever... If I were one of the scouts, that'd be the first thing I'd ask. I'd be like, how much are you in love with your facial hair? Because it has to go.

The NFL should let Bill Belichick or Nick Saban coach the Browns for their playoff game

The real solution, and I'm being dead serious on this: they should just be like, 'Bill Belichick can coach the Browns this week.' Wouldn't that be the greatest entertainment to be like, 'Okay, let's see how great of a coach you are, Belichick.' You show up, five days to prep the team. Browns fans would absolutely take it.

The Browns are a team of destiny because the Super Bowl is the anniversary of their mascot dog Swagger's death

I got a little sliver of hope for Browns fans. And that's that you are a team of destiny... the Super Bowl is being on the one-year anniversary of Swagger's death. Their dog died a year ago on the exact date of the Super Bowl... Swagger one laid the foundation for Swagger two to come in and turn the Browns into a winning team. One year later, I feel like they get that team of destiny vibe.

UConn is the real 2020 National Champion for opting out of the season

My Hot Seat is Alabama and Ohio State. They're playing in the national championship on Monday, but they aren't the national champions... the University of Connecticut, because they were the first football subdivision team to squarely face the coronavirus and decided against playing a single snap during a raging pandemic, should be our 2020-21 national champ. They are the real champions.

Kliff Kingsbury is a big-time fraud and I'm revoking his offensive guru card

Kliff Kingsbury. He waved the white flag on the entire season. Like they actually could of made the Playoffs. This was, it was delivered to them on gold platter. Like you were playing John Wolford... This was, this is the biggest indictment on, on Kliff Kingsbury that he's ever produced thus far. This game was his masterpiece explaining to everybody else. What we saw on him, which was big time fraud.

The targeting rule should be changed so the opposing coach chooses between 3 points or an ejection

I actually threw out Mike Greenberg's dumb rules. It should be. If you, if a guy gets called for targeting, the coach gets to decide either give the other team three points or you get to give the other team three points and he can stay in or he's objected. I like that.

Ryan Fitzpatrick should be in the Hall of Fame as a contributor to the game

I actually think that Ryan Fitzpatrick should be in the Hall of Fame. I think he should be a Hall of Famer. Not just memorable, not just because the bust would be legendary with the beard in it, but because like he's provided so many great memories... if he's not a player, he should be contributor to the game and get into the NFL. Absolutely.

The Pittsburgh Steelers are straight up frauds

The Pittsburgh Steelers are frauds straight up frauds. 11 and 0 to 11 and 3 losing as 14 point favorites to the Bengals. They are broken, they are hurt. They are damaged. And I don't know, like, has there ever been a team that's gone 11-0 and finished 11 and 5 and still going to the playoffs?

Giannis Antetokounmpo cannot be your best player in the final two minutes of a playoff game

Giannis might be when it comes down to the last two, three minutes of the game, he can't be your best player because of the style of game that he has... not a great free throw shooter, not a great jump shooter, everybody packs the paint... if you put James Harden on that team and late game where you need a bucket, you need free throws... he would be a perfect fit.

Trevor Lawrence won too much in college to be a successful NFL quarterback

I don't think Trevor Lawrence is going to be good... he's won too much in college. He's not going to be used to coming into a losing environment and having to deal with all the pressures that come along with having to deal with defeat all the time. I think he's sort of going to be like, 'Oh shit' type moment where you realize that this isn't Clemson.

Michael Thomas is purposely avoiding playing with Drew Brees

I have a new saints theory. I think Michael Thomas hates Drew Brees. He was on the IR when Drew Brees was healthy. Drew Brees gets hurt, he plays. Drew Brees comes back, he goes right back on the IR. I think he's trying to avoid Drew Brees. I think he's trying to avoid him.

Patrick Mahomes with one eye would still be the best quarterback in the NFL

Patrick Mahomes with an eye patch would still be the best quarterback in the NFL. It's crazy. If you confiscated one of his eyesights, he would still be, I think, yeah, I just think that he's built different. If you made him close an eye, he'd probably still be able to do 70% of the shit that he does right now.

Anthony Lynn is the dumbest coach in football history

Anthony Lynn is the dumbest coach that has ever been created in coaching history. And he fumbled again. He had a bird brain. He has a goddamn bird inside of the skull. Now the bird's dead because even the bird can't stand hanging out with him.

The 'Jessie's Song' caffeine pill episode of Saved By The Bell is a top 3 TV episode of all time

I think the episode with Jessie would still stand up. That to me is that the episode where she got hooked on trucker pills. That's one of the top three television episodes... 'I'm so excited, I'm so scared.' I mean goosebumps.

Jake Paul is a fraud and is scared to fight me

He is scared to fight you. That's what I heard. That's not a rumor. That's a fact. He texted Billy and it was like, I'm scared. Anyway. One step closer to me beat his ass. She's a fraud.

Leonard Fournette at fourth overall was a worse pick than Mitch Trubisky

I think Leonard Fournette being drafted fourth in 2017 was a worse pick than Mitch Trubisky... taking a running back with the fourth overall pick is crazy... you cut him, and then the guy who comes in, who's like a no-name [James Robinson], does really well.

Bill Belichick might lose to the Jets on purpose to block them from Trevor Lawrence

Is there any way that Belichick would lose intentionally to the Jets? [to keep Trevor Lawrence out of the division]... I would absolutely see Belichick doing that to keep Trevor Lawrence out of the division. That would be incredible.

Throwing a shoe should be legal in college football

I actually agree with [Dan Mullen] in a weird way... why can't you throw a shoe? Explain that to me. First of all, it was not a taunting thing. It was excitement... you should be allowed to throw your opponent's shoes. If they're already off, you should be allowed to throw the shoe as far as you want.

Coach K is the biggest front-running fraud of all time

Coach K is the biggest front-running fraud of all time. Not to brag, but we called it. It was a one game. Hank, they lost to Michigan State. They got killed by Illinois. And then Coach K said, we got to reassess and start really thinking about this COVID thing.

Greg Williams called the cover zero blitz on purpose to spite Adam Gase

I think he did it on purpose based on the fact that he and Adam Gase just don't get along. ... The only way you lose that game is to make the call that Greg Williams made. And I just think that Greg wanted Adam Gase to wear 0-16 on his resume.

Getting benched is the best thing that ever happened to Carson Wentz

I actually think Carson Wentz getting benched was the greatest thing that's ever happened to Carson Wentz. Dude, he's going to get paid to not play football. And he's really bad. So now he doesn't have to be really bad every week. I'm sure he dreaded playing football.

I would rock Jake Paul's shit because I have fewer commitments than anyone else

I legitimately have the least amount of commitments out of the whole company at this moment... I also like to work out and have endured a good amount of head trauma, which make me suitable for boxing... I would make him think I was easily beatable, but I would rock his shit.

Cooper Kupp is the most important player on the Rams

Here's a hot take. Team has Aaron Donald, Jalen Ramsey on it. Most important player, Cooper Kupp. I mean, they do look totally different when he's out there. Last year, their offense kind of went to shit... I said it.

The Cleveland Browns can win the Super Bowl if they play like they did today

These Cleveland Browns, and when I say these, I mean the Cleveland Browns that we saw today, these Cleveland Browns can win the Super Bowl. They're not going to play like this... That was the funnest half of football that I've seen all year from any team.

The Steelers are the worst 11-0 team of all time

Yeah, I think it's fair to say the Steelers are the worst 11-0 team of all time.

A smart NFL team should hire Cam Newton as a specialist for two-point conversions only

What a smart team should do is they should just hire Cam Newton to be their all-time two-point conversion quarterback. Go for two guy. Go for two every single time, snap the ball directly to him, and he either runs... or he does a jump pass. Cam Newton is probably the best short yardage football player of all time.