Takes

LeBron James is still fighting his inevitable baldness but will eventually have to give in

See, [LeBron] is fighting it. He's really still fighting it. Eventually, he'll come home, but he's putting up the good fight.

The Spurs were like the Blues Brothers on a mission from God in 2014

We were like the Blues Brothers on a mission from God that next season to get back to the finals and make right by that loss. And so once we got to the finals and matched up with Miami again, the rest was history.

LeBron James signs short contracts to force team management to stay aggressive

I don't think it's an accident he keeps signing these shorter contracts. He's not... LeBron James free agency not signing a five-year contract for a reason. I think he likes keeping his options open... The problem is [with long contracts] your team has no motivation to do anything for you. Plus all the money is locked up. They don't go bring anyone else in.

The Cavaliers are dead and have no chance in the 2017 NBA Finals

It is Monday, June 5th, and the Cavaliers are dead. They're dead... D-E-A-D, dead. I'm going to say it, and this is going to sound crazy. I actually feel a little bad for the Cavs. It's not fair. Like, what the Warriors are able to do is not fair.

The Warriors will beat the Cavaliers in a five-game 'gentleman's sweep'

I'm pretty confident... I'll give the Cavs one [game]. I want to hear the phrase gentleman's sweep again... I just really like that title.

If the Cavaliers come back to win the series, fans should unsubscribe from the podcast

You can quote me on this. If the Cavaliers end up coming back and winning this series, unsubscribe. For one day.

The NBA is now Kevin Durant's league and the torch has been passed from LeBron James

Are you ready for my hot, hot, hot take from Game 1 of the NBA Finals? Hit me. The torch has been passed. It is Kevin Durant's league. Whose man's is the NBA? I said that, yeah. It's Kevin Durant's man's. Passed that off. He said, here you go, KD. It is your league now. Your league.

The Warriors vs Cavs Finals will be a bloodbath and a forgettable postseason

I think the Warriors are going to. I think it's going to be a bloodbath. I think it's going to be the most forgettable postseason we've ever had.

Kevin Durant will be the NBA Finals MVP and play better than LeBron

I think Kevin Durant is taking this personally because he takes everything personally... I think Kevin Durant is going to be the MVP of the series. I think he's going to play even if not better than LeBron all series.

Lonzo Ball is one of the most prolific passers and has incredible vision

I reserve judgment on any of that other than that he is one of the most prolific passers and has incredible vision. I don't think there's very many guys that have come across in a period of time like that.

The Warriors will beat the Cavaliers in five games in the 2017 NBA Finals

My pick is Warriors in five.

The Cavs-Warriors rubber match is the NBA Finals we need

It is the Cavs, Warriors, the finals everyone wants to see, the finals we need. It's the rubber match.

The NBA is paying the refs

The NBA is paying the refs. The NBA actually always pays the refs. That's how they get paid. They're paying the refs.

Fans will get sick of the Cavaliers-Warriors NBA Finals preview within a week

We are all going to get so fucking sick of the Cavs-Warriors preview, because it's already starting. They're already previewing Cavs-Warriors, and then if both sides sweep... I think it's like seven days before the NBA Finals start. That's a shitload of previews.

Lonzo Ball is going to the Los Angeles Lakers

Lonzo Ball is going to the Los Angeles Lakers.

The San Antonio Spurs are dead

And the San Antonio Spurs are dead. Dead. D-E-D. A-D. Dead. Manslaughtered, as Greg Popovich would say.

The Celtics are obviously going to lose the series to the Cavaliers

We're obviously going to lose the series. That's a fact. I mean, Isaiah [Thomas], he got worked by the Washington guards. He's going to get worked by Kyrie [Irving].

James Harden will definitely need PR 101 assistance again in the future

First up, we have a little PR 101 for James Harden, who I'm going to call my shot here. I think this isn't the last time we're going to have to do PR 101 for James Harden.

The Spurs always successfully find the right veterans to fit their system

Actually, [the Spurs] are a team that just it's like a revolving door of talent. They always bring in the right pieces and the right guys to fit the system. And no matter how old or you might think they are, they might be getting guys that are on the tail end of their careers are still able to do and play at a high level.

I know every NBA referee by name to build rapport and avoid technicals

I talk to all of them. Know them all by name... Go up to them before the game, say what's up.

I am not confident about the Celtics playing the Cavaliers in the Eastern Conference Finals

I'm not really going to act like I'm super confident about playing the Cavs.

The Cavaliers and Warriors will meet in the 2017 NBA Finals

I think the Cavs and Warriors are going to play each other in the NBA Finals.

The San Antonio Spurs are a tougher matchup for the Warriors than the Houston Rockets

I can't not put my money on the Spurs. They're just like that team that always finds a way to get wins. Not saying they're going to win, but to get a win for sure, I think I'd have to go Spurs.

Lonzo Ball will have a target on his back in the NBA because of LeVar Ball

Anybody that gets hyped up that much, if you're the number one pick or your top pick that's doing a lot of talking, you're going to have a little bit of a target on your back for sure... there's like that extra unneeded motivation that other guys will have now.

The Raptors are a joke of a franchise

I got a little heat back from my take the other day that the Raptors are just a joke of a franchise. I don't mean it in a mean way. It's just facts are facts. When you think of the Raptors, you think of Vince Carter winning a dunk title and then getting swept.

The Cavaliers are going to sweep the Raptors

The Cavs are going to sweep the Raptors. Get us to the conference final. Get us to the finals.

The Raptors have a 7% chance to beat the Cavaliers

I think they're going to muddy it up... Two over five. Seven percent chance.

Greg Popovich will complain about James Harden flopping during their series

Pop is going to complain about James Harden flopping at some point in the series in his very Pop way... about how James Harden kind of jumps into defenders when shooting threes.

The Clippers must blow up their current core

Can we just be done with the Clippers as they currently are constructed? I don't know how they're going to blame it on Blake Griffin, but I'm sure they will. Doc Rivers, just stop. Just get out of here. Don't coach anymore. Chris Paul, go find another team.

If Rajon Rondo is the linchpin of the Bulls season, that is a big problem

I even hate even more is people saying, oh, well, if Rondo was still in this series, the Bulls win. Yeah, probably right. But if Rajon Rondo is like the linchpin for your whole fucking season, that's a big fucking problem.

If the Celtics win the next game handily, they will win the series against the Bulls

I think if [the Celtics] can win the next game handily, they can win the series.

The NBA playoffs are predictable and the first round is a joke

I mean, the only thing I don't like about basketball is just like it's pretty predictable who's going to the conference final. It's never really a surprise. So it's just the first round's a joke. Does anyone even pay attention until the conference finals?

Paul George's rivalry with LeBron James is completely manufactured

All rivalries pale in comparison to the Paul George-LeBron James rivalry. ... Paul George said that his rivalry with LeBron James is for the culture. ... a crazy rivalry that I don't think anyone including LeBron James knew existed. ... it's kind of like what we're doing with that snowflake cuck Mark Cuban just creating a rivalry out of nowhere.

James Harden has perfected the ability to get fouled whenever he wants

James has this unique ability to actually get fouled whenever he wants. It's unbelievable. He's asking for it. I don't know how he does it, but he has perfected it. ... If we're playing situational games in practice... I'll stick my arm out and he'll run through it and he can stop and start so quick... he does look for his little angles in practice to perfect it in a game.

The Wizards are going to win their series against the Hawks easily

John Wall is really good at basketball... He's very good. The Wizards are going to win easily.

The San Antonio Spurs are the most impressive franchise in American sports history

The Spurs are the most impressive franchise in the history of American professional sports, right? They've been good for, like, 25 of the last 26 years.

Russell Westbrook is the obvious choice for NBA MVP

To me, Westbrook is the kind of obvious answer, I guess. And Harden is the second most obvious answer... Leonard seems like it's overthinking it a little bit.

Golden State is better with Kevin Durant than without him

So you think that they're better with Kevin Durant? Yeah, for sure. I mean, I think they were better this year than they were.

Phil Jackson is actively trying to get fired by the Knicks to get a settlement

Phil Jackson is actively just trying to screw up as much as he can on purpose... Everything that you thought that Phil could do to try to get fired and get a big settlement, he has done it.

The Bulls will give the Celtics a good series in the first round

I think the Bulls are going to give the Celtics a really good series.

The Clippers are officially in America's 'friend zone'

Here's the thing about the Clippers. They're not a threat to do anything. They're in the friend zone. They're in America's friend zone... I'm totally comfortable with them taking me home on a late night and walking me back. I know it's going to be a hug and I'm going to go into my house.

Only the Spurs, Warriors, or Cavaliers can win the NBA title this year

Can you give us a team, not named the Spurs, Warriors, or Cavs, that can win the NBA title this year? [Ernie]: No.

Lavar Ball is just the basketball version of Kris Jenner

That Lavar Ball is just the basketball Kris Jenner. I don't know what that means, but I'm into it. He is basically going to market his sons so relentlessly and throw them in our face.

Kevin Durant likely won't lose his shooting rhythm despite his injury

He actually has a history of coming back from injury pretty well... he doesn't seem to lose his shooting rhythm. The thing that's a question mark... is that if he is 5%, 10% off, that's where you could see a big turn... it just wrecks all their form.

Andrew Bogut joined the Cavs out of pettiness to beat the Warriors

The question to Andrew Bogut is, is he petty enough that he wants to go play for the Cavs just for the shot to upset or to beat the Warriors in the finals as opposed to collecting the extra $3 million that he could have gotten if he had gone to the Rockets? And the answer apparently is yes.

The Chicago Bulls will beat the Warriors tonight on TNT and then lose to a bad team

They're going to beat the Warriors tonight. It's a home game on TNT on a Thursday night. The Bulls will beat the Warriors, and I will say the Bulls are back... and then they lose to some shitty-ass team.

John Wall and DeMarcus Cousins will eventually play together in the NBA

I actually think there's a decent – I think [John Wall] and [DeMarcus Cousins] will play together before they're done. They've been saying that for years.

The Bulls front office members Gar Forman and John Paxson are morons for their trade deadline approach

The Bulls, my Bulls made a trade, and they're morons per usual. They're doing the old, we're trying to rebuild on the fly, which has never worked... Doug McDermott and Taj Gibson to the Thunder is not a Woj bomb. That's just a guard and Pax are fucking morons.

Jimmy Butler is an incredible bargain because he signed his max contract before the salary cap spiked

I dropped Jimmy Butler contract truth, because Jimmy Butler is actually a great deal. He signed the max contract before the new salary cap, so he's going to be cheap for the next three years.

LeBron James is a coward for not participating in the NBA Dunk Contest

LeBron James that's not in the dunk contest again. Kind of a coward move. Michael Jordan was in the dunk contest. Back in the day, you had your best athletes in it. Vince Carter. You had your Vinces, your J.R. Smiths. You had everybody.