Takes

The Green Bay vs. Atlanta NFC Championship will be 'Mickey Mouse football' with no tackling

Green Bay against Atlanta is going to basically just be first one to 50. The Big 12 is going to be playing the NFC Championship game. I could not be more excited. It's Mickey Mouse football. Yeah, no tackling. It's flag football.

The Bears will try to trade Jay Cutler this offseason

He's got a very tradable contract, $12.5 million. I think the Bears will try to trade him. Depends on how this coaching deal shakes out. If Kyle Shanahan ends up the head coach somewhere, I could see him being potentially interested in Cutler.

Jim Irsay forgets he owns the Colts and is just doing Twitter giveaways all day

I don't think he is [going to fire anyone]. I think he just forgot he owned the Colts. He's just on Twitter all day. He's just been doing Twitter giveaways every day. He's like, 'hey, Jim, you still own this team? You get to make the decisions.'

The Green Bay Packers are not built for cold weather at Lambeau Field

You know what my favorite take is? The Packers aren't built for Lambeau. They're playing in the wrong stadium. This is a new look. Yeah, they almost wish they were somewhere else. They wish they didn't have a home game.

Sam Bradford had the best season for a quarterback in NFL history

Sam Bradford... he won the completion percentage, the greatest completion percentage in NFL history. Had a pretty damn good year... Sam Bradford, best quarterback in NFL history, best season.

Matt Moore is the truth

I think Matt Moore is the truth. Did you see him? He was having so much fun out there.

Kyle Shanahan will get a head coaching job and Mike Shanahan will be his consultant

I think what will happen is his son, Kyle Shanahan, will get a coaching job somewhere, and he'll go with Kyle to be a consultant.

Ryan Fitzpatrick will spend the next ten years as a premier NFL backup

He's got another 10 years in this league as a backup. ... You get your name out there as a starter for four games. Little film. All of a sudden... You're one of the premier backups in the league.

This week in the NFL will be a 'wonky' week where crazy things happen

I think there's gonna be a wonky week. It's one of those weeks where it's just like crazy things happen I just have a feeling... I just I feel like this is gonna be a wonky week.

The Super Bowl will feature some combination of the Patriots, Cowboys, or Seahawks

And it sucks to say this, but it's going to be the Patriots and the Cowboys or the Seahawks. Slash Seahawks, yeah. So some combination of that, that's where we're going to be in Houston. And I don't feel good about it.

The average lifespan of an NFL player is longer than an average American

The average lifespan of an NFL player is longer than an average American. No, even an average American. Like, it's longer. They live longer, healthier lives than an average American. CTE or not.

I'm jumping on the Cowboys train and betting on them for Thanksgiving, which means they'll probably lose

How long am I going to keep doubting the Dallas Cowboys? They're now nine and one against the spread... I'm going to bet on them Thanksgiving Day. And they're going to get, I don't know if they'll lose, but they're not going to cover the spread.

Robert Griffin III will lead the Browns to their first win and his free agent stock will soar

That would be the most Robert Griffin triumph of all time is if he led the Browns to their one win. And then, guess what? Stock goes way up in the free agent marketplace.

The Patriots and Seahawks will meet in a Super Bowl LI rematch

I think you're right about the Patriots. Who are they going to lose to? I'm taking Seattle. rematched of the game two years ago. I think their offensive line eventually gets straightened out.

Jeff Fisher will start Jared Goff in the next three to four weeks to avoid being fired

I'm going to call my shot. Within, I'm going to say, three or four weeks, depending on the record, I think Jeff Fisher is going to make the call. He's going to move Jared Goff up. And at that point, you can't fire a coach when he's developing a quarterback. So that's going to buy him two more years.

The NFL will move to an 18-game regular season within the next five years

There's a chance it will if the NFL makes enough concessions to the union... if there's a way that they can address that issue [player health]... it's going to happen.

The sun is on the Hot Seat because its glare could cause the Bills to lose

Miami Dolphins to beat the Bills this weekend because she [USA Today podcast host's mom] doesn't think that the Bills are going to be able to handle the glare of the Miami sun. It's a fair point. Developing situation. Let's keep an eye on it... The sun is on the hot seat right now, so this could really be it.

Jeff Fisher has at least two games of security before returning to the hot seat

Cool throne, Jeff Fisher. He's got at least two games before he's back on the hot seat.

At least five teams in the league right now could easily win the Super Bowl

I'll name them right now. These are the teams that I think easily could win the Super Bowl this year: New England, Pittsburgh, Denver. Now, Minnesota could win the Super Bowl. Green Bay could win the Super Bowl. Philadelphia could win the Super Bowl. Have you seen their defense play? They've allowed 27 points in three games.

J.J. Watt needs to wear a surgery cone so he doesn't re-injure himself working too hard

The bottom line is J.J. Watt needs a cone around his head like you give to a dog after surgery because he's so anxious to prove what a hard work he is. This is what it's all about. He rushed back from a back surgery so he could be like, oh, I'm a big, tough guy.

The Vikings have the best defense in the NFL

But seriously, though, the Vikings look awesome. Their defense, I mean, best defense in the league. Probably.

Matthew Stafford will finally make the leap this year because Calvin Johnson was holding him back

Is this the year that Matt Stafford finally makes the leap? I'm going to say yes. Calvin Johnson was holding him back. Better without Calvin Johnson. He can spread the ball around.

Chuck Pagano and Sean Payton are on the hot seat to start the 2016 season

I got Chuck Pagano... both the Saints and the Colts, they're in win-now mode. And not only that, but Chuck Pagano, he's been healthy for a while. I think you can fire him now, and it's not like, ooh, we just fired the guy who had cancer.

Teddy Bridgewater's injury is actually a positive for Vikings fans because it removes the stress of expectations

I mean, right off the bat, it's kind of nice. You don't have to get your hopes up. It's vacation season for Vikings fans. Like, you know, just relax. Take your shoes up. You don't have to stress yourself out during the games. You get to kind of take it easy.

I will play a maximum of three more years of football

The end's in sight, but we'll see. Maximum would be three years. Minimum would be [one].

Dak Prescott is a speedster who will redefine the quarterback position

I've done a little scouting on Dak Prescott, your backup. Athletic, mobile. He's going to redefine the quarterback position. He's a speedster. I don't know if we've ever seen an athlete like Dak Prescott back there. He's instinctive. He's not a thinker. He's kind of like a Mike Vick type.

Robert Griffin III getting his new girlfriend's name tattooed on his arm is a massive mistake

Robert started dating Greta and immediately got her name tattooed on his arm for the whole world to see. This is one of those Jimbo's that Robert doesn't even know... Bobby doesn't even know that he's Jimbo'd yet, but he's Jimbo'd.

Sean McDonough will not disagree with Jon Gruden once in his first six weeks on Monday Night Football

Find me one time that [Sean] McDonough disagrees with [Jon] Gruden in the first six weeks and I'll call you a liar. McDonough is like, he's coming in there looking at Gruden like the cool guy in town. And so he's going to be pulling out all this. He's just going to be agreeing with Gruden nonstop.

No one on the Patriots actually has Tom Brady's phone number

I've strictly asked that question multiple times, and he [Nate Ebner] said no one on the Patriots has Brady's number, but if you want to get a hold of him, you contact his massage therapist.

The New York Giants will finish the 2016 season 10-6

Giants record for the year... Ten and six.

Julio Jones will have a breakout year in 2016

I would be on the lookout for Julio Jones. I think that this is going to be his breakout year.

Aqib Talib can extend his career by seven years by capitalizing on his shooting incident

Tlaib may have just extended his career by like seven years. Because now he can get that really sappy E30 with Jeremy Schaap... A second chance is worth like two more contracts. So smart move on Tlaib's part, getting shot, because now he gets like an opportunity to prove himself again.

The Eagles deserve a C+ for their 2016 draft because they didn't move up for a wide receiver

If I had to give the Eagles a draft grade, I would give them a solid C+. Why? Because I strongly feel like even though they traded their picks up and they drafted Carson Wentz, who I think's a fucking G, I feel like they could have made a move and traded up to get into the second round and get a wide receiver.

Carson Wentz's corny Twitter presence is a major red flag

You got to watch out for guys like this who are just like a little too corny on Twitter. It's like the – it's like – what's it called? Draft Day. Great movie, by the way. What's he hiding?

The Cleveland Browns are smarter to do nothing in free agency than to fail spectacularly again

I think the Browns are just playing the game where they fucked up so bad in the past and everything that they've done that not doing anything is actually a smarter move than trying to do something and failing because you can't stay still. You're going to piss off your fans for about six months if you don't do anything in free agency. But a fan's not going to remember that like a year from now.

Brock Osweiler is too tall and will trip a lot in the NFL

Brock Osweiler. He's like six, eight. He's crazy tall, too tall. I feel like he's going to trip a lot in the NFL. Is that crazy?

If John Skipper couldn't get the Chargers to move to L.A., he won't be able to stop our podcast

[John Skipper] is the guy that couldn't even get the Chargers to move up to L.A. I don't think that he's going to be able to get our podcast up there.

The Raiders will get good and then immediately move to L.A., totally screwing over the city of Oakland

I think what's what's going to happen is you're going to see the Raiders get really good. or start to get good and then move to L.A. right as they get good and totally screw over the city of Oakland... you can see the Raiders make some noise out in the West and then immediately move to L.A.