Takes

LIV Golf should execute the last place team every week to fix their ratings

I have a very simple way to solve this ratings issue. Execute the last place team every week... The ultimate relegation. Yeah. To the afterlife... Or they don't have cuts but they could chop your head off.

Odell Beckham Jr. will have 2,300 receiving yards if he signs with the Chiefs

If he signs to the Chiefs. The Chiefs are all the way back. They're all the, he's gonna have, Odell Beckham's gonna have 2300 yards receiving if he signs with the Chiefs.

Zach Wilson's physical ceiling is Patrick Mahomes

Ceiling is Patrick Mahomes. Ceiling. Physically, they can make the same throws. Physically. They may not do it at the right times, or as accurately, but he can do the same thing.

Bryce Young is officially too fat to draft after his Combine weigh-in

I actually ran the BMI on Bryce Young for his exact height and weight. 29.3. He's borderline obese. Yeah. He's too fat to draft. This guy's a tub of shit.

The team with the #1 overall pick is essentially the second-best team in the NFL

There is only one team that can win a Super Bowl. Everyone else is a loser. Except the team that has the first pick. We are literally the second best team. There's the first pick in the Super Bowl. Right. That's it.

Juju Smith-Schuster is a piece of shit and AJ Brown would beat him up

He's a piece of shit. Like, I don't know who he thinks he is... AJ Brown would beat the absolute fucking... AJ Brown would've. AJ Brown basically said, said that he would, he would beat the fuck out of him if he's keep talking about him.

The Bears should consider trading both the #1 pick and Justin Fields to maximize draft capital

The Bears Trade, the number one pick. Okay. The Bears also trade Justin Fields. Then you're loaded. Just have like eight first round picks. The Eagles were able to load up because they were able to, to take advantage of a cheap contract with a quarterback. What if we just strip it all the way down and get all the picks and have all the Cap and Caleb Williams, Drake May coming up.

Sam Hurd was released from prison early to serve as viral marketing for the movie Cocaine Bear

Sam Hurd has been released from Federal penitentiary... after serving a 10 year sentence for distributing cocaine. Timing is very suspicious with the release of Cocaine Bear. A lot of people are saying that this judge might have taken some money to do some gorilla marketing for the movie.

Charlie Woods is going to be better than Tiger Woods, Jack Nicklaus, and Max Homa combined

[Big Cat]: Charlie's next up he's gonna come and beat your brains in... [PFT]: Charlie Woods is gonna be better than Tiger... better than Tiger and Jack combined. [Big Cat]: Better than you. [Max Homa]: Done. You'll just be gone. Which is actually pretty exciting and we'll caddy for him.

Dan Snyder will sign Lamar Jackson to a fully guaranteed contract just to spite the other NFL owners

Dan Snyder, out of spite just to fuck over the next owner would love nothing more than to give those two first round picks away and on top of that, throwing a shitload of guaranteed money in a contract extension for Lamar Jackson... it would be a fuck you to those [other owners] that don't want these guaranteed contracts.

Sam Howell will have an MVP season under Eric Bieniemy

I got the system. Patrick Mahomes is a system quarterback now I have the system. Yeah. The system is mine and Sam Howell MVP season coming on.

The 'Sod Father' George Toma intentionally sabotaged the Super Bowl field to favor the Kansas City Chiefs

George Toma, the Sod Father... He worked for the Kansas City Chiefs. He has two Super Bowl rings. He's a Kansas City resident. He's a Kansas City Chiefs fan... me and Lamar Hunt were so close. This is again before the Super Bowl against the 49ers that they won... I'm just presenting facts that if you would like to cope, this might be how you'd want to cope... Eagles defense had a player slip on 38% of Patrick Mahomes drop backs... the Chief's defense had a player slip on only 14%.

Kirk Cousins' Pro Bowl victory proves he can win big games

Kirk Cousins leads NFC to a comeback. So there you go. All the haters that say Kirk Cousins can't win a big game. He just won the Pro Bowl Flag Football challenge.

Tom Brady’s career was the direct result of the assassination of Archduke Franz Ferdinand

He's the walking embodiment of the butterfly effect... Gabriel Prince [Gavrilo Princip] got assassinated or assassinated Archduke Franz Ferdinand... It immediately led to Tom Brady's career in the NFL. Started all of it.

I still believe Carson Wentz has some good football left in him

I still believe in Carson... You don't jump ship on somebody that quickly [Colts]... I still believe that he's got some good football in him. I'll take him on the Vikings, man.

The NFL is rigged and scripted to get Patrick Mahomes in the Super Bowl

The NFL is rigged, rigged. It's rigged for ratings or for money. ... This shit is fucking rigged. The NFL is rigged. I don't, it's scripted everything. They get a script at the start of every season and then Hollywood kicks them out because no one would believe the script. ... They want Patrick Mahomes in the Super Bowl.

Brock Purdy winning seven Super Bowls would erase Tom Brady's legacy

I'm rooting for Brock [Purdy] in the Niners because Brock has a chance to totally erase Tom Brady's narrative and legacy if he wins a Super Bowl... If he wins seven, he would have a better [story]. He was drafted Mr. Irrelevant. He would totally erase Tom Brady's underdog story because it's an even bigger underdog story.

The NBA gave LeBron James a 'stimulus package' in the 2016 Finals by suspending Draymond Green

Game four, LeBron and them is about to lose the game. LeBron gets frustrated, he takes Draymond Green, throws him to the floor... Somehow some way revisionist history comes in and the NBA decides to give LeBron James and Cleveland a stimulus package. They suspend Draymond for game five... That is the one final that I will never accept being wrong about because the NBA suspended Draymond Green.

I looked at the evidence and it might have been a DeMar Hamlin body double at the Bills game

I don't think he's dead. But [it] was very snowy. That shot conveniently... why was he wearing goggles? He had a sheisty... I'm just saying like it was just, there was just like, I looked at the evidence. I'm just raising it so we could have the conversation.

Carson Wentz is a 'mental pussy'

He's a mental and he's like, wait, I can't say the word that comes after that. He's like, he's a mental pussy.

Brandon Staley should be fired and tried for war crimes for his coaching performance

I think that Brandon Staley should be tried for war crimes as a war criminal. I think that it's a disgusting act. What I saw in the entire second half of that game... You can't have a worse coaching back-to-back weeks than what Brandon Staley just did.

To beat a young quarterback like Brock Purdy, you have to hit him in the balls to make him flustered

You try to get them in a situation where they're flustered, they're nervous, things are not normal. ... maybe you hit him in the balls a couple times, he hadn't been hit there. ... if you hit him and when you hit him, you twist the face mask, you pinch him on the neck, you, you, you grab him in the balls. Like you, you do something to make him think about anything except football.

The Dolphins should fire Mike McDaniel to guarantee another playoff appearance

The Dolphins have made the playoffs three times in the last 20 years and all of them with first year head coaches. Tony Sparano, Adam Gase, Mike McDaniel... Why not just fire him? Fire him. Get somebody new in there, get some new blood. You have a better chance.

JJ Watt is a better football player than he is a person

He was a much better player? Yes. He was like one of the top three all-time players... He has three defensive player of the year awards Only one man of the year award. So I'd say he's a better, the stats don't lie. He's a better player than he is a person.

Harambe would get seven sacks a game in the NFL

You gotta take Harambe, right? I mean the strength to weight ratio is just way higher than humans. I mean that's a easy seven sacks a game I'm sure.

Coach K's legacy is tarnished forever because he lost his final game to UNC

And Coach Mike Krzyzewski is dead. R.I.P. Coach dead. You had a hell of a run, but you're dead. His legacy is tarnished forever. It can't get worse than what happened.

Zach Wilson might be better than Russell Wilson

I had a thought in this game, which tells you how bad Russell Wilson is. Is Zach Wilson better than Russell Wilson? ... I actually was like, maybe Zach Wilson is maybe a little bit better because Russell Wilson can't even do the things that he used to do.

I could have made some of the throws Zach Wilson missed against the Jaguars

I was watching the fucking game and looking at concepts that I ran in high school that he was reading wrong. I'm serious. And I like my arm talent. It's not fucking pro arm talent, but I could have made some throws and just get it to guy to make play.

I will give Billy $10,000 if the Buccaneers beat the Cardinals 14-12 exactly

I will give you $10,000 if that's what happens in this case... 14 or 15 to 12 Bucks. Beat the Cardinals. Yes. For $20,000. Christmas.

Charlie Woods could win the Masters right now if they let him in

Charlie Woods could win the Masters right now if you wanted to. Is there a way that if they let him in, he could win it? ... Charlie Woods is gonna be the greatest. He's next up. We've always said that on this podcast. He is now he's him.

Pissing in the kitchen sink is a reward for doing the dishes

I would say I'm still, probably two times a week I piss in my sink. ... Kitchen? What? No, that's what I finished doing the dishes late at night. I, I actually think that this is, and then I just run the, run the water. ... It's a reward. It's a, it's whatever. I like it.

The NFL is rigged to screw over owners like Robert Kraft and Dan Snyder

The NFL is rigged. I'm boycotting the NFL. Clear as day, the NFL is a rigged league. That's why they classify it as entertainment and not as a sport, so they can fake all of it. There's a script. The NFL is out to screw over owners that he doesn't like, like the Patriots, like Mr. Kraft, like Mr. Snyder in DC.

Charlie Woods will have more natural ability and be better than Tiger Woods

I love Charlie Woods. I think Charlie's gonna be better than Tiger. I think that even Tiger would admit, Charlie's got more natural ability than Tiger ever had in his life.

Weather is not real and the Bills vs. Dolphins game will go over the total

Hank weather isn't real. Also over 44... This is going way over. I'm a big believer in, it's one thing I know... Saturday night. Great game weather doesn't matter. This is going way over.

I played an entire month of the 2020 season with appendicitis and didn't tell anyone

I woke up in the middle of the night sweating, shivering, my stomach hurts so bad... I can't tell anybody about this. I just signed a contract extension, like I have to play... Played in the game on Sunday and then I told the team Wednesday... they're like, oh yeah, you have appendicitis. Like you, you've had it for a week... I basically had appendicitis for the first month of the season and the antibiotics made it go away.

Lionel Messi will choke in the 2022 World Cup

My sit is Lionel Messi. This is the time of the year... he's due for a choke in the fucking World Cup. He's not my goat. He's gonna put up a big fat goose egg in there going down.

Mike White's ceiling is Tom Brady

So I like Mike. His ceiling is Tom Brady. I said this when he got his ceiling is Tom Brady.

Nathaniel Hackett might be the worst NFL head coach ever

I am saying he's the worst coach ever. Nathaniel Hackett would understand, like, we've been very nice. You fucked up a lot... Hey, Nathaniel Hackett, like to show that we're friends, I'm gonna be like, 'Hey dude, you might be the worst coach of all time.'

Lionel Messi is the Chris Paul of soccer if he doesn't win the World Cup

My hot seat is Lionel Messi in Argentina because Argentina just lost 2-1 against the kingdom of Saudi Arabia... maybe the biggest defeat in the World Cup, some are asking is Messi a bust? Some are asking is Messi the Chris Paul of soccer? I think it's a fair comparison at this point.

Zach Wilson and Patrick Mahomes would have a competitive game of PIG/HORSE

On that take, I will say if you took Zach Wilson and Patrick Mahomes and made them compete in a horse or pig like game where they had to complete certain throws probably not covered. They'd probably have a competitive game.

I could start over 50% of the quarterbacks currently in the NFL

How many quarterbacks in the NFL right now do you think that you could start over? [Chad]: 50%... I feel like I know the game a lot more than a lot of people. Cause I started at such a young age and that's all I knew in order to, you know, make it in life... I think people mistaken my on the field capabilities of thinking clearly because they see that I do some dumb things off the field.

Derek Carr isn't an NFL quarterback because he only throws one deep route

Derek Carr. Oh, okay. There we go... I watched all their games. He's only throwing one big dig. Right? One big end. That's what we call it. Right? You clear it out, you fill the date behind it. Right. If you can only do that one time in 6, 7 games, I don't know what, how you're supposed to say you're an NFL quarterback right now.

Zach Wilson's ceiling is still Patrick Mahomes

I know this sounds crazy, but I really think [Zach Wilson's] ceiling's Patrick Mahomes. Just, it sounds crazy... I still think his ceiling is there.

The 2022 World Cup will not be finished in Qatar

I don't think the World Cup's gonna finish. I think it's gonna get canceled for some reason... I don't think it's gonna be finished in Qatar... it sounds like the literal Fire Fest. I'm getting Fire Fest vibes.

Buffalo and Upstate New York are a complete dumpster fire

Upstate New York as a whole to me is just a huge dumpster fire. And it offends me actually that people from up there can say they're New Yorkers... you're only a New Yorker if you live in NYC or Long Island.

The Marcus Jordan and Larsa Pippen relationship is MJ's final revenge on Scottie Pippen

I just imagined MJ being like, did you hear all that shit about Scottie saying that LeBron's better than me? Go hit up Larsa. Yeah, let's, let's start this relationship Dogs. That's tough.

If the Saints have to start Andy Dalton in primetime, I'm going to jump in front of a bus

I gotta keep my composure cuz again, I'm going... if I have to watch Andy Dalton in primetime, I'm gonna jump in front of a bus. I I will watch a bus... what you getting run over by a bus? Yeah. Yeah. For, for pmt views.

Russell Wilson would be the worst quarterback in the NFL to take drugs with

I actually think that Russell Wilson would be the worst quarterback in the NFL to take drugs with. Oh my God, any drug doesn't matter. Like, can you imagine Russell Wilson on cocaine? How fucking annoying he would be... He would two seconds in be like, Do you guys feel it?

I will get a Kirk Cousins face tattoo on my ass if the Vikings win the Super Bowl

I'm gonna get Kirk Cousin's face tattoo on my ass if [the Vikings] win the Super Bowl... I will do the, I was wrong tattoo. If they get to the Super Bowl and if they win the Super Bowl, I will get a Kirk Cousins. I'll get his face tattooed on me.

Georgia could beat the Green Bay Packers

I think it is time that we ask the question, could Georgia beat the Green Bay Packers? I think that they could hold the Packers to under 30 points. Aaron Rodgers wouldn't throw for 300 yards against them.