Takes

Zdeno Chara is the sports respecter of journalism of the year for writing down answers with a broken jaw

Zdeno Chara has a broken jaw, he can't speak, and he still met with the press and answered questions by writing down his answers. Class act. ... The respecter of journalism of the year. Sports player who respects journalism the most of the year.

Zdeno Chara has a broken jaw

I'm going to speculate that it's something far greater than just his teeth. And I would assume it's a broken jaw. Because if it was just his teeth, he would have came back to that game in the third period.

Jordan Binnington is going to go into Boston and steal a game

I still think that Binnington has to steal one game this series where he stands on his head. And I said that yesterday's podcast that dropped this morning, that I have a feeling that he's going to go into Boston and steal a game.

The St. Louis Blues will win the Stanley Cup in six games

My assumption is that [the St. Louis Blues] are going to get the job done. I picked Blues in six.

The Stanley Cup Finals is over and the Bruins will win

Series is over. He [Jordan Binnington] looks very, very shook. He's rattled. They let in seven goals.

If the Hurricanes lose their playoff series, Big Cat will track down and kill Hamilton the Pig.

If the hurricanes lose, I'm going to try to track down the pig and kill it... I'll kill a pig. Let's do bacon until it dies of a heart attack.

Brad Marchand should not have been suspended for his 'rabbit punch' on Scott Harrington

I was going to puke if he got suspended. That is not a suspension. Stanley Cup playoffs, a little punch in the back of the head while the guy's on his knees... it was not suspension worthy.

NBA players and fans are soft for cheering an injury comeback that NHL players do routinely

I saw that asshole from the Cavs [Kevin Love]... broke his nose and came back with a fucking mask on and got a standing ovation. Are you shitting me? Ryan Malone on Pittsburgh... got a slap shot directly in the face... shoved a couple tampons out there and came back, no mask, no standing ovation for him.

The St. Louis Blues have a 100% chance to win the Stanley Cup

They're a really good team. And it'd be one of the coolest stories ever. Last place, January 3rd... I mean, they got a lot of good weapons there... So there's a chance 100% that they could get the Cup.

The 'Curse of Barry Trotz' will haunt the Capitals in the playoffs

Are you a little worried about the curse of Barry Trotz? Because I just decided there's a curse of Barry Trotz... where the team that fires him [gets punished]... now he's going to get his vengeance.

The Washington Capitals series against the Hurricanes hasn't actually started yet

I'm not worried because the series doesn't start until a visiting team wins a game. And so far, it's just been two at home, two at home. So we got a three-game series. And people laughed at me when I made my first prediction. I said, Caps in two. They said, yo, PFT, you're a maniac. That's not possible. It's a seven-game series. Guess what? It's a three-game series now. So it is possible for the Caps to win in two games.

Capitals losing 5-0 is better than a close overtime loss

If it was a 4-3 overtime loss, I would be a little bit more worried. But the fact that I was rooting for it to get worse... 5-0, you can just wipe that one off. You can just say, wasn't our night, fellas.

The Washington Capitals killed the Eastern Conference

Did the Washington Capitals kill the Eastern Conference? Not just the Penguins, who, by the way, they haven't won a game in the playoffs since the Caps beat them... Nor have the Tampa Bay Lightning.

The Capitals will beat the Hurricanes in five games

I'm assuming they're [Capitals] going to win. It's Caps-Canes. Sounds like a Burlington Coat Factory, not a playoff series. I'm very confident. I'm thinking, like, Caps in five.

Alex Ovechkin and the Capitals are going to make another deep playoff run.

So this is all lining up for the Caps to make another deep playoff run... I would be very, very afraid if I were the Eastern Conference right now. Very afraid. Very afraid. I'm just calling it. It's our year.

Calgary and Winnipeg are the only Canadian teams with a realistic shot at winning the Stanley Cup

Calgary and Winnipeg are the only teams who have a shot. I don't think that Toronto's going to beat Boston first round.

Fighting is dead in hockey because social justice warriors have taken over and influenced the league

Fighting is dead in hockey... all these social justice warriors have kind of taken over and directed the league in a certain way. I feel bad for league officials... because it's just a constant barrage of people bitching about everything.

I would rather take punches to the face than block shots for a career

I would rather take punches to the face than have to block shots as a career... I'd like to take punches to the face rather than block shots. I was one of those guys where I just didn't like doing it, and sometimes I would flamingo.

The Columbus Blue Jackets are the winners of the trade deadline for going all-in

Columbus is a winner for me. They went out and made a bunch of good moves. ... They're trying to win one, and they never even won a playoff series. ... I think the fans kind of deserve it.

Patrick Kane is the greatest American-born hockey player ever

Kane, holy shit, he keeps getting better. It's the best I think it's the best he's ever been. It's just he's the best American-born player ever. That's my hot take of the day.

The New York Islanders are not 'for real' and cannot win the Stanley Cup

I'm going to say, like, no, right? [to are the Islanders for real] ... I understand, too, they think this is the beginning of what will be a successful year... But I don't think they can win the cup.

The Washington Capitals have a 20% chance of repeating as Stanley Cup champions

Pittsburgh did it for the first time in like 20 years... I'm going to say 20%. They're a good team, right? ... I just think that it's tough because guys are exhausted and they've ripped it up extra hard.

Calgary's Saddledome is a complete shithole

It's really cool to look at from the outside, but it's a complete shithole. For a current day pro sports arena, it's in the very, very low bottom percentage of that entire list.

Montreal is the best atmosphere in North American hockey

Montreal... you should see this place. Just the fans right on top of you... the seats just go straight up. It's loud as hell. The French are completely nuts. By far and away, it was my favorite place to play.

Half the internet will hate whatever name the Seattle hockey team chooses

Whatever they're going to name [the Seattle hockey team], prediction, whatever they're going to name it, half the people on the internet are going to be mad. Half the people are going to like it just like their jerseys.

Jalen Ramsey could make it to the fourth tier of professional hockey with six months of training

If [Ramsey] had six months of elite training... I think that he could maybe make the [SPHL]... based off his athleticism... mentally he wouldn't understand the game much.

NHL parity is what makes it superior to all other major sports

To me, the parity is what strengthens the NHL over all the other major sports... things are constantly shaken up because of those rules... in the NBA, it's just like, hey, who's going to play the Warriors?

I want to coach Jalen Ramsey to play hockey

I kind of want to see him [Jalen Ramsey]. I want to teach him. I want to be his coach. I love how cornerbacks talk trash and obviously he was just doing it to stir the pot... but I'm over here like, man, I kind of want to see him try.

The Washington Capitals run was a dynasty

The Washington Capitals. So the Caps year wins year of the year. Truly a magical run. A dynasty. Maybe the best hockey team of all time ever assembled. Great coaching, great executing, great fans.

Barry Trotz is not a great coach and got lucky winning the Stanley Cup

I don't think that Barry Trotz is a great coach. I think he got lightning in a bottle. He got lightning in seven.

The Capitals are going to win only nine games next year and I am fine with it

I wouldn't be surprised if the Washington Capitals won nine games next year. And I'm totally fine with that. I am 100% fine with them absolutely crapping themselves because it was all worth it.

The Washington Capitals will win the Stanley Cup again next year

The only reason you're going to feel like it was lame is because the Caps are probably going to win again next year, and you're going to be like, we're used to this, right?

The Washington Capitals dynasty has already begun

The dynasty has already begun.

The Capitals will win the Stanley Cup in five games

This series is fucking over. Done. Done. Over, finished, no chance. They're not even going to get a single more game. It's going to be 4-1. Caps in 5.

If Alex Ovechkin wins the Stanley Cup, he might be the GOAT

If [Ovechkin] gets the Stanley Cup, which would be his third Stanley Cup in this playoffs, you've got to say, is he the GOAT? He might be. GOAT Vetchkin? It's either him or Gretzky.

The Capitals will suffer the biggest championship hangover ever and miss the playoffs next year if they win the Cup

If Ovechkin wins the Stanley Cup, I am predicting the biggest championship hangover of all time in — we're not even making the playoffs next year. No, I bet he's going to score five goals next year because he's going to spend the entire summer on a yacht in the Caspian Sea just having hookers and blow just delivered to him by Putin.

The Washington Capitals are a team of destiny

We're going to talk about how the Washington Capitals, our Washington Capitals, are a team of destiny? Yes. ... Cap's got this. They're just stronger. Stronger, faster?

Braden Holtby's poor rebound control and lack of mobility will cost the Capitals the Cup

My biggest worry for a Caps fan is [Braden Holtby]... these rebounds, those are not – that will not win you the cup, those rebounds... his mobility isn't nearly what it used to be. So if you're going to come out and take away those angles, the rebounds can't go anywhere but the corner.

This might actually be the Washington Capitals' year to win the Stanley Cup

Today is Friday, May 25th, and might actually be the Caps year. Like, it's still shocking that they're in the Stanley Cup Finals. And I'm not saying this in a mean way because I, too, root for and have rooted for loser franchises, but, like, the Caps were a loser franchise. So to get over that mountain, it takes a lot.

Tom Wilson is a star and a complete badass

Tom Wilson, that dude's a star. I fucking love Tom Wilson. He's a badass. We make fun of him a lot because he tries to cut people's head off with his skates. And he like intentionally hits people in the head... but he's no longer on fraud watch.

The Capitals are a Team of Destiny because they beat the Lightning

Every single team that has defeated the Lightning in any round besides the first round went on to win the Stanley Cup. Team of Destiny. Doesn't get any more Team of Destiny than that. Now they're 2-0 in Stanley Cup this year. It's a dynasty.

I am officially worried the Capitals will lose Game 7 to the Lightning

I am worried. I am very worried. And the reason why is I saw this coming a mile away. I knew the Caps were going to lose Game 5. I knew they were going to win Game 6 just so that they could lose Game 7 in my face.

The Capitals will win Game 6 and then lose Game 7 in heartbreaking fashion

I'm not worried because it is our destiny to win this game [Game 6] and then go to a game seven and then lose that in heartbreaking fashion.

I am not worried about the Washington Capitals despite the series being tied

Listen. We just wanted to say, as a team. It's our year. We're not worried. So the Capitals lost... But we didn't win. We didn't win, but we're the better team. Not worried.

The CHL Fortnite addiction story is a hoax created by an old-school GM

I'm a little bit woke on this... I'm a little bit woke that some grumpy Canadian GM was like, all these kids are playing their video games all the time, so we're going to make up a scare and make up a player and say that he's not going to make it.

I am NOT worried about the Capitals

We're not worried about the Caps, repeat we're not worried about the Caps... I'm actually not worried. I'm not worried. Nope. We got another one at home. Marlon's Man's going to game four.

Mark Scheifele is an NHL superstar now

I want to get respect out to Mark Scheifele. I don't if you've been watching the Western Conference. He's a, I'd say superstar now, Scheifele. He's incredible.

Vladimir Putin hands out unlimited credit cards to high-end Russian hockey players

I've just heard some rumblings, and it's been confirmed by a few guys that, like, Putin basically hands out credit cards to all these high-end Russian hockey players like Malkin and Ovechkin. Where basically they could just go, like if you say they want to pop bottles one night, they just go, they just put it on the Russian credit card.

The 2018 Washington Capitals are playing better than any version of the team in history

I'm telling you, this Capitals team is playing better than any Washington Capitals team than I've ever seen with the exception of like every Washington Capitals team between the month of October and February.

Winning the Stanley Cup in their first year would be bad for the Las Vegas Golden Knights franchise.

There was a takequake on ESPN the other day... they said that Las Vegas winning the championship in their first year would actually be bad for Las Vegas... I agree 100% with that. You can't set the expectations that high.