Takes

The Denver Nuggets winning the 2023 NBA Finals is the start of a dynasty

This is the start of the dynasty. This is, this is merely, but the first chapter that we're writing with Nuggets. If, you don't get three titles then. It's a failure.

The Heat's defensive strategy of letting Nikola Jokic score while shutting down his passing works

[The Heat's] strategy was we're gonna let Jokic score as many points as he wants to... Just be a scorer... because two points is not as much as three points. And so their zone defense was kind of predicated on allowing him to be a scorer, not a passer.

Jalen Brown does not know how to dribble

Jalen Brown does not know how to dribble. I don't know if that's something he's gonna learn. And then, I mean Jason Tatum obviously I think Jason Tatum probably smells the best coming out of this run... But where do you go and Marcus Smart? I don't know. Do you keep rolling out the same thing year after year?

Our backs are against the wall but we just have to win Game 6 to get home court for Game 7

Backs against the wall. This team is tough. This team has been there before. Just gotta win. And then you got a home court advantage for game seven.

The Nuggets will beat the Suns by 12 points in Game 5

I think they're gonna win by 12. I think it's gonna get ugly late. I don't think Devin Booker can keep up the pace that he's been on. The sons have no bench and they're fucked when he is out.

LeBron James will be a bad father by making Bronny leave college early to play with him on the Lakers

LeBron's about to be a bad father because he's going to deny his son a degree just so that he can draft him to get him to play on the Lakers.

Joel Embiid returning to the lineup will discombobulate the Sixers

I think that Embiid coming back at not a hundred percent will discombobulate them. I think it helps [the Celtics]. ... If Embiid comes back it's gonna discombobulate them enough for the Celtics to win.

The Sixers will win Game 1 against the Celtics and Tobias Harris will score 30 points.

Sixers are gonna win. I think Tobias Harris goes off for 30 tomorrow [tonight].

Playoff James Harden is dead

My take of playoff James Harden is dead, died last night cuz he was so bad. I was so excited after Saturday and then last night, I mean he like didn't even belong on the court.

Austin Reaves is the true alpha on the Lakers

But the real story outta that game was Austin Reaves. Yeah. Austin Reaves. AKA him. He is him.

The 76ers will beat the Nuggets in the NBA Finals

And without a doubt, I think this year's finals is gonna be a battle of these MVP Big Men. It's gonna be the 76ers against the nuggets. Wow. Embiid, Jokic, centers are back... and I'm taking Joel Embiid and the Sixers to win their first title since 1983. So Wow. Ending a 40 year drought. You can just book it.

The NBA only created the play-in tournament to get Zion Williamson and more sponsor money into the postseason

The reason the playing tournament was basically started, much like Harry Potter and the Goblet of Fire got admitted to the Tri Wizard tournament as a fourth wizard. They wanted to get Zion Williamson into the playoffs his rookie year... Also, the NBA just wants another event to slap a sponsor on.

The Celtics will beat the Hawks in five games

We'll get, we'll give 'em [the Hawks] one game just cuz it's the NBA. You never know what's gonna happen. Maybe they win a home game. Celtics in five. If it goes six something went seriously wrong.

The Philadelphia 76ers are currently in a complete free fall

My hot seat is the Philadelphia 76ERs. They're in a complete, complete free fall. Lost four outta the last five they played. Yoic. Everyone's talking about Embiid versus Yoic for mvp. MBI wasn't even man enough to play. James Harden also didn't play kind of a bullshit excuse like calf soreness.

The Celtics will not win a championship because Joe Mazzulla is too religious

The Celtics can suck my dick. I think ever since Joe Mazzulla... do you see where he, when the fucking, the Queen of England or whatever, or the prince came to visit? They asked about that and he was like, I, I thought the only royal family was Jesus, Mary and Joseph. And I was like, all right, they're gonna lose. No fucking bitch ass nerd who says something like that is winning a fucking championship.

NBA Finals Prediction: Nuggets over Bucks

If it's not the suns, I'm gonna say, I'm gonna stick with my nuggets. My nuggets over Hank's Celtics... Nuggets over the bucks.

Adding Kevin Durant to the Phoenix Suns would make them a major threat to win the Western Conference

The Phoenix Suns are prepared to pursue Brooklyn Nets star Kevin Durant... that scares me a little bit because I do think that the Suns with Kevin Durant would probably become a significant threat... the West is crazy. The West has every team could win it right now.

The James Harden to Houston rumors are true

Harden says quote, 'I don't know where you found that report.' ... He was being so wishy-washy, but it was like, 'I don't know where you found that report.' And then it's like, yep, that's it. [The rumors are true].

The Denver Nuggets will beat the Boston Celtics in the NBA Finals

Finals predictions... Nuggets and the Celtics. [Nuggets win]

The Heat will face the Warriors in the NBA Finals

I'm going to go Heat Warriors.

Kenyon Martin's comeback from a broken leg is one of the greatest feats in sports history

It blows my mind that a guy could like him, could break his leg and come back and play 11 years in the NBA... I'll bet you nobody's ever done that in the history of sports. With a broken leg and come back and... that's a lot of running, that's a lot of jumping and pounding.

Chet Holmgren should spend his injury year getting 'dummy thicc'

If I'm Chet Holmgren, I'm spending this year, like doctor's orders. You can't go on the treadmill. You can't go on the elliptical. No Peloton, no stair climber, just get dummy [thicc] Chet. Just get fat, Chet. You'll be a better basketball player.

An NBA owner will eventually refuse to trade a superstar just to push back against 'player empowerment'

I feel like the pendulum has swung so much in the direction of player empowerment that we're going to get one owner that's just going to be like, you know what? Fuck it. Fuck it. I'm not changing anything.

The Nets should refuse to trade Kevin Durant and force him to stay

I actually am of the belief that the Nets should just be like, fuck it. You're staying on the team. You signed a four year deal. Like they used to mean something kind of pushed back player empowerment. Like, Hey, no, you can't be traded. We're going to keep you.

Kyrie Irving's teammates probably don't enjoy the drama despite what they say publicly

I would guarantee his teammates don't love this. I don't know. But he gets so much... I feel like all of his teammates that have ever talked about him publicly have said how much they love him. They like go out of their way to come up them playing with him. Yeah. But he, the problem is he hasn't been playing that much.

The high-end talent in the 2022 NBA Draft ends after Jaden Ivey

Everyone's talked up—does it end after those three guys [Banchero, Holmgren, Smith]? I think it ends after [Jaden] Ivey. I do think he's that good. There's just something to be said about a guy that moves unlike everybody else. They don't make a lot of people that move on a basketball court like Jaden Ivey.

The Celtics are a super young core and they will definitely be back in the Finals

It's like, they're super young and they're going to be back. And the position [Brad Stevens] is in... he is now going to be able to help the team get better through the front office. It's not drastic changes. Don't need to be made.

Draymond Green is the new Ben Simmons

[Draymond Green] is Ben Simmons... Steve Kerr deserves a ton of credit... for having the balls to pull Draymond out of the fourth quarter. Draymond Green does not want to shoot. He is Ben Simmons at this point where it's like, he could have a completely open look going towards the basket and he will pass it up.

The Warriors are impossible to beat if Steph Curry and Klay Thompson both have a night where they're 'on' from start to finish

If those two guys make all their shots, if they get to a night where they're both on, then they're pretty much impossible to beat. It doesn't matter how good the Celtics can play... but they're not going to be able to do that. Like that's not, it's impossible for them to sustain that type of basketball.

The Warriors will win the NBA Finals in 7 games with an overtime finale

I'm going to [say] warriors in seven in an overtime game seven. Wow.

The NBA Finals will be a 7-game series between the Warriors and Celtics

I said warriors in seven on Tuesday and I've like, ever since that moment, I've just everything that's gone in. My head has been like, I think the seltzers are going to win, but I'm going to stay. I'm sticking with warriors.

The Warriors would have made eight straight NBA Finals if not for injuries

I'm willing to make a giant excuse for the Warriors for the two out of the eight years that they did not make the finals. It's all because of injuries. Like the Warriors should have been in the finals eight years in a row.

The Mavericks' formula for winning is Luka Doncic scoring 28 while three other starters score in the high teens

That's the formula more [Mark] Cuban should just be like, Hey, every night Luka you go out there and you score 28 and also have like three other starters in the late teens, early twenties.

The Celtics will beat the Heat in five or six games

I do think the Celtics are a better team. Like I think this should be a five or six game series. And I just, you know, Heat culture all that shit, but that was, you know, even the bubble, like the Celtics team is a much different team than they were in the bubble. They're way better.

The Heat and Suns will both win their Game 6 matchups.

And honestly, like, I, I would bet that both of these teams that won tonight are probably going to win game six.

James Harden is actually playing himself into shape in front of our very eyes

I would be worried that James Harden is actually playing himself into shape in front of our very eyes. He actually took it coast to coast a couple of times tonight; didn't have to stop for breath or hit the oxygen tank halfway.

The Celtics will give the Bucks a 'minor whopping' in their playoff series

As with all that being said, like minor whopping... six games. If the only two that you lose are on the road, that's a minor whopping.

The Miami Heat are the most frightening team in the Eastern Conference

The Heat are such a good team right now. I would be, that's the team that would scare me as a true blue Celtics believer. That is the team that scares me out of the East.

My live-betting strategy of taking teams down by 15-20 points in the first half is a winning system

It's a strategy though. It's a system. If a team is down by like 10 to 15, 20 points and it's still the first half, there's a live bet moneyline the other team. It's a simple system... no lead is safe in the NBA, especially in the playoffs.

The media will eventually try to make Kyrie Irving a victim and vilify Celtics fans

I'm just worried that what's going to happen is since all these quotes are being taken out by the media, people are gonna be like, they're gonna turn Kyrie into like a big victim and everything and then turn and then turn the Celtics fans into like the big bully.

The Milwaukee Bucks will sweep the Chicago Bulls in the first round

The bucks are going to kill him. It's going to, I just want it to be over as fast as possible... the box are going to sweep the bowls and at least I know how to deal with Packers fans.

The 2022 NBA Finals will be the Brooklyn Nets vs. the Golden State Warriors

I'm going to double dip. I'm going to go nets warriors... Meaning like the warriors are kind of, I'm treating them the same way I'm treated the nets, which is they're too good. They've got so much talent. They're going to figure it out.

James Harden is the perfect piece to pair with Joel Embiid

I do think the Sixers are very good now. James Harden's perfect piece to pair with [Embiid], but it's going to piss people off, especially that James Harden has now done it twice where he's skinny all of a sudden again, he feels great and he just duped everyone.

LeBron forcing his way onto Bronny's team will stunt Bronny's growth

Bronny Jr. is probably going to not even want that dude... if you see any of the draft projections or watch him play, it's like, he's good. He's not lottery pick good. But someone's going to spend a first round pick on him cause they can then get LeBron... there's a chance it could really suck for Bronny.

The Chicago Bulls are officially back

My cool throne is the Bulls because Bulls are back. They're the last undefeated team in the East. They are good.

Ben Simmons will face an all-time 'boo-fest' upon his return to Philadelphia

Ben Simmons has arrived in Philadelphia, took a COVID-19 test as required by NBA protocol... I love going to a good boo-fest. Going to the Sixers' first game, I might have to figure out, talk to Tick Pick and get out there. So perfect that it's Philly... Philly's going to roast him.

Cade Cunningham's veganism is a major red flag for his NBA durability

I am concerned with Cade Cunningham though... it's because he's vegan. If you're a vegan going into the NBA, Jalen Green's 180 pounds, he will probably be able to put on another like 20. And Cade Cunningham's probably gonna lose weight over the course of his career. You can't trust a man made of the plant proteins. That's his durability and his mentality.

Jay Crowder shooting over 50% from three is the tipping point for the Suns' offense

I would like to see the statistical breakdown of Jay Crowder's performance as it relates to how likely the Suns are to win. Like, if he shoots over 50% from three... That's the tipping point for the Suns' offense because you have a chance of beating them if the role players don't contribute like that. But if they do, you have no chance.

The Bucks will beat the Hawks in seven games if Trae Young remains out

I do think that if Trae Young doesn't come back in the series, I think the Bucks will probably win the series. And seven, I'm gonna say seven. So the Hawks will win another game, but it's just a bummer. It just feels like a bummer.

The Hawks can only beat the Bucks if Kevin Huerter has an unconscious game

I also think it's going to be very tough for the Hawks to win [the series] unless you have a Kevin Huerter is unconscious game. If Red Velvet's unconscious, then you have a chance... But if you don't get him involved, then, like, what?