Takes

NFL players should not be confident in their union representation with JC Tretter as NFLPA head

He's a moron. So it looks like Roger Goodell now has his doofus set up as they go into the next CBA. If I was an NFL player, I would not be too confident about my representation right now.

Timothée Chalamet can't win the big one after losing another Oscar

Timothy Chalamet. Yeah. Did not win... he's now in that like, can he win the big one? It's, it's I think it's his third time. Nothing. Can't win the big one. Nothing to show.

Ludvig Åberg is a choker who can't win on Sundays under pressure

Ludvig Åberg. Can't win the big one. Yeah. Big time. Can't win the big one. Another choke. Choke to the masters... He stinks on Sundays. I don't know what it is about him... just when he gets under pressure he just melts down.

White Boy Summer will be canceled if Chet Hanks remains stuck in Colombia

Chet Hanks is stuck in Colombia right now... now he can't get back to the United States because they won't let him back in. There's no greater American than Chet Hanks. And we're in danger of having white boy summer canceled this year if Chet's still stuck in Colombia.

Peptides are the play for weight loss and health in 2026

Through some limited extensive research, I think part of my peptides might be the play. All the hot people online are just like, 'these are what you need to do. Take these peptides, you'll lose a bunch of weight.'

Jordan Queen has already wrapped up Jordan of the Year in February by wearing an Orchids of Asia Day Spa shirt to the Duke-UNC game.

Jordan [Queen] was there [at Duke-UNC]... and she was wearing an Orchids of Asia Day Spa shirt. Unbelievable. Which is the day spa that Robert Kraft got jacked off in. Jordan of the Year is open and shut case... early February. Jordan of the Year has been wrapped up.

Duke cannot just lose a basketball game; they always have to make it about a larger issue like player safety.

I just love when Duke loses. They can't just lose, they have to make it about something... It has to be something bigger than just basketball. It has to be, you know, teaching kids to become men or unsportsmanlike or this or that or the other. Just lose the fucking game. You lost the game, you choked.

Lindsey Vonn crashes every single time she is hyped up to ski.

I basically, every time they say, 'Hey, Lindsey Vonn's about to ski'... she's gonna crash. I woke up and they were like, 'Hey Lindsey Vonn competed this morning and she crashed.'

The NFL's 'Chief Kindness Officer' Dhar Mann is a scam artist

I asked this only because I saw a bunch of people. He, he, so he got, he got made kindness officer. And then all the entire reaction was, this guy's a scam artist. If you're this guy, why would you ever accept this? So, 'cause you know, like, you can't go, you can't take a position like this knowing that most people are gonna be like, dude, this guy's full of shit.

Giannis Antetokounmpo might be traded to the Chicago Bulls this week

Second [favorite to land Giannis] is Chicago Bulls at plus three ten... the rumors of him to the Bulls have always kind of been there being like, he loves Milwaukee so much that he's not gonna leave living in Milwaukee and commute. Which he could do, but it would be the most ridiculous thing ever.

The NFL should implement a 'Loony Rule' requiring teams to conduct one absurd head coach interview

Instead of the Rooney Rule, we need a Loony Rule where every single team has to do one crazy out of the box interview. Have Pinto Ron come in with his ketchup and his mustard... I watch Cortez get interviewed for the head coaching job... you'll get something out of that conversation that will help you going forward.

Boxing is officially dead as a sport

Boxing's dead. It's currently dead. It might get brought back to life bad, but it's a bad spot. But boxing, boxing as we know is dead.

AI technology is failing because it doesn't justify its investment costs

I think AI is in hot water. I feel like this is, we're we're in a good spot as humanity right now where AI has not been making enough money to justify all the investment. ... We might beat the robots.

Michigan players saying they were 'protecting the logo' after getting crushed is pathetic

If you're a Michigan fan, you have to be completely embarrassed that that was actually said afterwards... to come a to afterwards be like Yeah, we were making sure that they couldn't do anything with the m we're gonna protect the m... That's so pathetic.

Michigan's obsession with 'protecting the logo' after a blowout loss is pathetic

If you're a Michigan fan, you have to be completely embarrassed that that was actually said afterwards... to come afterwards be like Yeah, we were making sure that they couldn't do anything with the m we're gonna protect the m... That's so pathetic.

Lane Kiffin will leave Ole Miss to coach LSU

I feel like it's gotten the point where you, if I had to guess I would say LSU. [Lane Kiffin] is probably gonna leave. I'm changing my, I know I said like two weeks ago I didn't think he was gonna leave.

The Barstool Internet Invitational was the best piece of sports entertainment ever on YouTube.

I do actually think that that was the best piece of sports entertainment I've ever watched on YouTube. In the YouTube video format. It was the final round had like so many twists and turns in it. It had a lot of emotions.

Lincoln Riley might be fired or leave USC soon

USC... I think Lincoln Riley might be out. I think there's guys that might leave the places they want to be, even though they're not doing bad. I think it's gonna be basically full on musical chairs.

V.J. Edgecombe's NBA debut was the best since Wilt Chamberlain

VJ Edgecombe. Absolute beast. That's how, that's how you rebuild right there... Best NBA debut since Wilt Chamberlain. Wow. It's crazy. It's a crazy stat. Most points in his NBA debut since Wilt Chamberlain... 34 [points] in a win over the Celtics.

Taylor Swift's new album is a flop

My other's back the week is Taylor Swift... heard it was a flop. From what I've seen, I, I would give it not her best... some are saying it's, it's chat GPT. It's it's, yeah.

If you care about the Super Bowl halftime show, you're not a football guy

I'll say it. If you have a hot take, a really strong opinion about the Super Bowl halftime show, you're not a fucking football guy. You showed yourself. You're an anti-football pussy. You gotta watch film at halftime. You gotta figure out what to bet in the second half.

The Mets are spineless pussies who couldn't get it done

The Mets are just a bunch of spineless pussies and they just couldn't get it done. Pete Alonso was out the door before the game ended. They're gonna get their teeth kicked in by the Dodgers.

James Franklin simply cannot win a 'big' game

James Franklin can't win the big one. Nope. It's the same game every year, the same exact game. We watched the same thing that we've watched every time.

Ryan Clark is a 'piece of shit' for berating Peter Schrager

My who's back of the week is our guy Peter Schrager... Ryan Clark's a piece of shit. I'll just say that... he just like berated Peter Schrager for having a take on a take show because he didn't play the game... Ryan Clark, come on, man.

LeBron James is only playing another season to avoid retiring in the same year as Chris Paul

I think the only reason he is not gonna play, or he is gonna play another year is 'cause Chris Paul's gonna retire. He doesn't wanna retire the same year as Chris Paul because Chris Paul would overshadow his retirement.

I refuse to support the global expansion of the NFL because I only care about American fans

I honestly don't care if, if, if other countries watch football or not, like this whole, like global expansion of football, do not care. I watch football with my friends in America. I don't give a fuck what they watch over there.

I would literally kill a man for Mike Vrabel

I'm there, [Mike] Vrabel. I'm already there. I would literally kill a man for Mike Vrabel.

The Philadelphia 76ers will win the 2026 NBA Finals

I'm gonna match and double. I'm gonna say they're gonna win the finals. They're gonna win a chip. Love it.

World War III is overrated and the term is being overused

My Who's Back of the Week is World War III. We're doing it again, boys. I think this is the fifth World War III that's happened in the last four years. ... I'm so sick of everyone saying World War III just started.

Victor Wembanyama will kill everyone next season after training as a monk

I do feel like this is gonna be [Wembanyama] fucks everybody up next season because he's Yeah. He's figured out like secret ancient martial arts.

I would fight Marlon's Man in a Rough N' Rowdy match.

I'm not ashamed to beat up a 68-year-old man... I'll fight you in Rough N' Rowdy Marlon's Man. Balls in your court.

Abdul Carter is a loser for trying to take the retired numbers of Lawrence Taylor and Phil Simms

Is Abdul Carter a loser? I it's very weird. A weird tumble guy of all time... to on day one, go into your new company and be like, I want the numbers of the two most famous guys that everybody loves. Lawrence Taylor... then he's like, all right, how about Phil Simms? No, pick your own number man.

Jordan Hudson is a smart marketer and the brains in her relationship with Bill Belichick

She's an incredible marketer. She is. I think she's the brains in that relationship. Jordan, if you can land us Bill Belichick on PMT, you can interrupt as many times as you want. We're a Pro-Girlfriend podcast. That's fact.

Kidney stone pain is worse than childbirth

Also, the doctor again for the second time told me that this pain is worse than childbirth. Which I will not be saying to any women, but it's true... I've given birth to like 13 kidney stones. I'm as tough as Philip Rivers' wife.

Ja Morant's addiction to fake guns is the best addiction of all time

Ja Morant can't quit holding fake guns. It's the, it's the best addiction of all time. I respect the hell outta that... the NBA coming down on him for his fake guns is bullshit. Just ignoring all the history of Ja Morant with real guns. I love that shit. It's behavior that like a five-year-old would do.

Jim Morrison might still be alive and faked his death in 1971.

My other who's back of the week is Jim Morrison, maybe. Oh, he might be alive. Apparently there's a documentary on Apple TV that claims that he's still alive. He says that he did not die in Paris in 1971. They said that he faked his own death and there was never an autopsy done. I think he lives somewhere in the Midwest right now. The liver king might still be alive.

JJ Watt will come out of retirement to play for the Cincinnati Bengals

JJ Watt is back. He is probably going to come out of retirement to play for the Bengals... I'm rooting for that to happen. I think he would be able to do it.

College basketball needs 'asshole' coaches like Dan Hurley to be interesting.

College basketball needs asshole coaches. That's what it was built on... I need a coach K, I need a like as much as I hate Coach K, he has that that like, ah, I hate him. I wanna root against him. Dan Hurley is that if you hate him, that's good for college basketball. So I want him to do whatever he wants to do.

Wooly Mammoths will be cloned and brought back from extinction

My who's back of the week is Wooly Mammoths... There's a company called Colossal Biosciences and they just raised $200 million... to bring back and clone wooly mammoths... Willie Mammoths might be back soon.

Mike Vrabel is a fraud who relied on Prime Derrick Henry

Mike Vrabel is proof that one smart clock management moment in a nationally televised game buys you five to 10 years of NFL media thinking you're a great coach... Prime Derrick Henry is not walking through the Patriots door... He was a Derrick Henry merchant.

Everyone complaining about Cam Ward sitting out the second half of the Pop-Tarts Bowl is a loser

Anyone who was upset about Cam Ward is a loser and they're just basically looking for something to be angry about. ... He's also got millions of dollars on the line if he gets hurt. I don't understand it. ... Bowl games don't really mean anything and it's entertainment and it's kind of stupid but it's also fun.

Arizona State could go on a run in the College Football Playoff because they are so hot right now.

I think Arizona State's one of those teams that is so hot right now, and they were 11-1 with their starting quarterback. Why can't they go on a little run?

I will fight anyone who says Indiana shouldn't be in the playoff

I will fucking fight. If you find someone online who's saying Indiana should not be in the college football playoff—tag me snitch. Tag 'em. I just—I wanna fight 'em.

LeBron James wants Coach K to replace JJ Redick as the Lakers' head coach

I think this is LeBron wants Coach K as the coach Lakers and JJ out. Yeah, because it was a dream Coach K. And it was about Duke, JJ's team.

Jason Kelce was in the right for smashing that kid's phone

Jason Kelce turned around, grabbed his phone, smashed it through the crust of the earth, awesome spike... I have no problem with that guy brought the F-word into it. He was very clearly harassing him. I stand with Jason Kelce.

Joel Embiid was justified in shoving the reporter

I am on Joel Embiid's side. This reporter Marcus Hayes wrote an article basically calling Joel Embiid... calling out his dead brother. You don't have to bring up Joel Embiid's family. Talk shit, get hit.

Carson Beck's sleeve tattoos are a bad look for a quarterback

I have a theory on Carson Beck. I think the, I think the tattoos are too much for a quarterback. That's just not a quarterback's look. ... If you have tattoos on your throwing arm, that tells me that you definitely took at least a few hours away from practicing.

Karl-Anthony Towns is a terrible fit for the Knicks

Was your initial reaction like mine, which was basically that KAT could not be a worst fit for this team?

Texas is back and will win the College Football Playoff this season

Texas is back. Big time back. Texas is legit... Whoever wins that Georgia, Texas game, that's gonna be the winner. They're gonna win the whole thing.

John Gruden is secretly advising the Chiefs and is effectively on their coaching staff

John Gruden was at Chiefs practice today... he was wearing a Chiefs uniform and he was advising Chiefs coaches. Whoa. So I think John Gruden might be secretly on the Chiefs' coaching staff now. He's like Mid-hat right now with the Chiefs.