Takes

The Washington Nationals might not be as terrible as originally thought

The Washington Nationals might not be as terrible as I thought that they might be. There you go... I'm gonna overreact a little bit, but I still think they're not gonna be very good. But it's good having young players that are playing well.

If NFL players practiced for two weeks, they would easily beat the best professional flag football team

I think that if you gave the pros like a solid two weeks of practice with coaches that coach flag football, I think the pros could be better. Yeah. But it would take like... there are differences in the game. But yeah, if you gave them two weeks, they'd win.

The Lakers will lose 4-1 in the first round of the playoffs regardless of their current hot streak

What's gonna happen is they're like, they're good, but the other two teams above them are better and have been better all year and younger. Right? But again, what's gonna happen is they're like, 'They're good, but the other two teams above them are better.' ... When everyone tries to tell us the Lakers are gonna win the title, I'll just be like, 'Okay, cool.' They'll lose 4 to 1.

Phil Mickelson will win a LIV Golf event this year

Phil's gonna win one this year. Phil's gonna win one this year. They're getting him ready to... if you just say you want leave, they'll just give you a win.

The NFL will choose the Cowboys to play the Seahawks in the season opener

I'll go cowboys... I'm gonna bet that they just cowboys. They smashed the Cowboys button. They love that shit. Cowboys Giants Sunday night football. They love that shit.

The Seahawks will move Giannis Antetokounmpo to Golden State

Do I? I think he might go actually to Golden State... Giannis would be open to finding other teams that are interested in collaborative effort on a basketball championship.

Giannis Antetokounmpo might be traded to the Chicago Bulls this week

Second [favorite to land Giannis] is Chicago Bulls at plus three ten... the rumors of him to the Bulls have always kind of been there being like, he loves Milwaukee so much that he's not gonna leave living in Milwaukee and commute. Which he could do, but it would be the most ridiculous thing ever.

Pete Carroll will be fired during Black Monday

Pete Carroll out for sure. Gotta be gone. I don't even know if they have to tell Pete Carroll. I think they just gotta be like, 'Hey man, we'll see you next year' and then just never send him like when the OTAs are.

John Cena will return to WWE within the 2026 calendar year

I would say within a calendar year [of now]. ... Next calendar year, [John Cena] will be back. If it was his final match, he would not have lost.

Lane Kiffin will leave Ole Miss to coach LSU

I feel like it's gotten the point where you, if I had to guess I would say LSU. [Lane Kiffin] is probably gonna leave. I'm changing my, I know I said like two weeks ago I didn't think he was gonna leave.

The Chicago area will get three inches of snow that will be gone by Wednesday morning

I'll predict right now... I think we're gonna get three inches and it's gonna be gone by Wednesday morning.

I will bet on every single college basketball game tomorrow

I'm so excited for college basketball. I'm gonna bet, I'm gonna bet every game. I'm gonna bet every single game. It's gonna be awesome.

Lincoln Riley might be fired or leave USC soon

USC... I think Lincoln Riley might be out. I think there's guys that might leave the places they want to be, even though they're not doing bad. I think it's gonna be basically full on musical chairs.

The Buccaneers will beat the Lions in Detroit next week.

Early prediction for the game without them playing any plays is gonna be Buccaneers win in Detroit.

Curt Cignetti has to be the next head coach for Penn State

Sigge [Curt Cignetti] has gotta be the guy. They went to Oregon and they just fucking kicked the shit out of them. Sigge is a great coach, don't get me wrong. I don't think he has Indiana in his blood. I think that if Penn State called, he's picking up the phone.

Charlie Woods cemented himself as the future of golf after his hole-in-one

Charlie Woods is back. He got a hole in one on the third hole at Sawgrass today... Charlie Woods is the future golf. I think he cemented that today.

I will cut my penis off if Rutgers is ever ranked #1 in football

I said when Greg Schiano was announced as the head coach of Rutgers, that if... Rutgers is ever ranked number one in football, I will cut my penis off. I feel good about that bet, actually.

The Miami Marlins might sneak into the MLB playoffs

The Miami Marlins... might sneak away into the playoffs. They're six games out of the Wild Card. I don't know, fun story going on in Miami.

Dustin Poirier will not stay retired and will fight again

I never believe it. Because then they, you know, they, they get arrested, they get healthy and they're like, ah, I could, I could do one more fight. I could make, you know, a nice payday doing another fight.

The Philadelphia 76ers will win the 2026 NBA Finals

I'm gonna match and double. I'm gonna say they're gonna win the finals. They're gonna win a chip. Love it.

Victor Wembanyama will kill everyone next season after training as a monk

I do feel like this is gonna be [Wembanyama] fucks everybody up next season because he's Yeah. He's figured out like secret ancient martial arts.

The Oilers will win the Stanley Cup in seven games

I think it's Oilers. I got Oilers in seven. I think it's Oilers.

The Florida Panthers will win the Stanley Cup in five games

I'll go Panthers in five.

Brooks Koepka is my pick to win the Masters this year

I gotta pick for you guys... I'm thinking Brooks [Koepka]. I like that he's won there before. I bet Brooks every single year. I'm a loyal guy.

Aaron Rodgers will announce his signing with the Steelers on Pat McAfee's live show

The theory is that Aaron Rodgers is waiting for [Pat McAfee's Pittsburgh show] to come out on stage and say I'm going to be a Pittsburgh Steeler to fuck over the mainstream media. Which I would love. That would be awesome... I kind of like every now and then a player stealing it from the insiders and being like, I control my own message.

JJ Watt will come out of retirement to play for the Cincinnati Bengals

JJ Watt is back. He is probably going to come out of retirement to play for the Bengals... I'm rooting for that to happen. I think he would be able to do it.

Rory McIlroy is officially back and this will be the year he finally turns it around to win the Masters

My Who's Back of the week is Rory McIlroy. He's smashing. He won the AT&T Pro-Am at Pebble Beach. This might be his year... he might turn it around. [Golf doesn't start until the Masters] This might be his year to win it.

The Wisconsin Badgers are playing well enough to make a deep run in the NCAA tournament.

I have started to believe in the Wisconsin Badgers who are ranked and their offense is actually awesome and they wap threes... I actually believe that they could make a, a run.

TikTok will never actually get banned

I think they said they're, they're doing like a 90 day extension and then it might be banned again, but there's just no way that it ever gets banned.

Wooly Mammoths will be cloned and brought back from extinction

My who's back of the week is Wooly Mammoths... There's a company called Colossal Biosciences and they just raised $200 million... to bring back and clone wooly mammoths... Willie Mammoths might be back soon.

Arizona State could go on a run in the College Football Playoff because they are so hot right now.

I think Arizona State's one of those teams that is so hot right now, and they were 11-1 with their starting quarterback. Why can't they go on a little run?

Juan Soto will sign with the Boston Red Sox

I'm seeing some tweets. I'm seeing some reports... Juan Soto's sister looking at apartments in Boston... Kirk Minihane reported that he's a hundred percent signing with the Red Sox.

The 76ers will make the playoffs

They're gonna make the playoffs. Paul George is playing tonight. What are we gonna do five games into the season? They're gonna make the playoffs.

Jayden Daniels will play against the Bears because he knows the importance of the matchup for the podcast.

Jane [Jayden] Daniels gonna play because he knows how much this means to us as a podcast. I think that he, that thought has gone through his mind.

I can successfully kick a 44-yard field goal with two months of training.

I think I can get to 44 yards if I give myself two months of training. Hank dunking, me kicking a 44 yard field goal. I'm gonna try to work the leg back up.

I still believe I can dunk a basketball by January 1st.

I still think I can do it. I need to lose some weight... I still need like five inches. I'm 180 pounds. I was like 171 pounds in July. So I need to lose some weight basically.

New York is going to eat Karl-Anthony Towns alive

I think Knicks fans are going, I mean they were really mean to Julius Randall and if KA... I just don't think [New York] is going to eat him alive.

The Rams are going to make the playoffs

I would actually be a little bit nervous about that [the Rams win]... because the Rams won this game. And it Sean McVay. Yeah. They've literally proven they can win a Super Bowl. They're gonna get healthy. Correct. Correct. They're gonna make the playoffs.

I will cut off the tip of my pinky if the Falcons win the Super Bowl

Falcons are not winning the Super Bowl. Guaranteed. Falcons are not winning the Super Bowl. That's, I I believe it end the season. Tip of the pinky. If the Falcons somehow win this game on Monday night, I have to also have the Rams.

Texas is back and will win the College Football Playoff this season

Texas is back. Big time back. Texas is legit... Whoever wins that Georgia, Texas game, that's gonna be the winner. They're gonna win the whole thing.

John Gruden is secretly advising the Chiefs and is effectively on their coaching staff

John Gruden was at Chiefs practice today... he was wearing a Chiefs uniform and he was advising Chiefs coaches. Whoa. So I think John Gruden might be secretly on the Chiefs' coaching staff now. He's like Mid-hat right now with the Chiefs.

The Sherrone Moore NCAA text deletion scandal won't be a big deal in a week

He [Sherrone Moore] deleted a couple text messages in regard to Connor Stalions and his possible knowledge on the situation... 52 text messages... I don't think anyone's gonna talk about this in a week from now.

Bryson DeChambeau will win the U.S. Open as an homage to Payne Stewart

I think this is it for Bryson [DeChambeau]. If Bryson comes and wears, because remember he used to wear the scaly cap. Payne Stewart. I could see it happening. As a homage to Payne Stewart. I'll call my shot right now.

The US will be under a massive cyber attack soon, and everyone should withdraw their cash

I suggest you take out all your money outta your bank and stop using credit cards for the next few months until I can give you the green light again. We will be under a cyber attack sooner rather than later... I'm in communication with the very important person for one of, if not the biggest software companies in the world... I met a guy on a plane... He's a higher end for a major major software company... he just pretty much said like, I know too much, but I don't at the same time.

The eclipse and the CERN particle collider will send us into the fourth dimension

They're turning CERN on the day of the eclipse. And I believe the research is they're trying to reach a fourth dimension... Once the the moon covers the sun when it comes back, like we'll be in the fourth dimension. Like everything will be different.

The New York Yankees have already won the World Series after their opening sweep of Houston

I'd just like to be the first to congratulate the New York Yankees on winning the World Series. Yeah. Four game sweep in Houston. Congrats. Juan Soto has been incredible. The Yankees have won it all.

The USMNT must reach the World Cup quarterfinals in 2026 or it is a massive disappointment.

I'm still, I'm staying my prediction that we need to make it, if we don't make it to at least the quarter finals in the next World Cup. Massive disappointment.

Michigan basketball will return to prominence quickly under Dusty May.

Recurring guest Dusty May is going from FAU to Ann Arbor... I think they're gonna be back quickly.

Robbie Avila will be a breakout star if Indiana State makes the NCAA Tournament

Robbie Avila from Indiana State. ... He's got rec specs. And he is, if Indiana State gets to the tournament, which they are the best team in the Missouri Valley right now. We could have like a, this, this guy could like, capture the hearts of America.

The Wisconsin Badgers are going on a miracle run in March

I am all in on the Badgers. They're good... and I'm believing, I'm believing in a miracle March run. I'm usually pretty honest about where my heart is... I'm gonna be unsafe in March. If they keep playing the way they're playing, I'm gonna be emotionally unsafe.