Takes

The Masters is 'above' selling gimmick hats with pimento cheese on them.

The Masters shouldn't have hats that you could like, that says like Peach on it, right? Pimento? I just feel like the Masters is like above that. The Masters has such a cool logo and they're so like strict with it that like that's all they need, you know?

Tiger Woods should just never drive again

He should just never drive again.

If Tiger makes the cut at Augusta a week after his DUI arrest, it would be the most impressive sports story in the last 10 years

What if he played well? How would the announcers talk about it? I think they'd immediately jump to like what a redemption story this is. Tiger making the cut out of Augusta after getting arrested for DUI seven days before — is this the most impressive sports story that we've had in the last 10 years?

Jupiter GC Lynx will never win a TGL championship

I actually say right now, Jupiter's never gonna win one. Unlike Saturn, no rings. It is crazy that we got Tiger Woods and we can't win.

Jacob Bridgeman's wife is wrong; he is a better golfer than he is a person

Jacob Bridgeman... there was a clip on PGA tour posted from his wife that said he is a better person than he is a golfer. Not true. Not true, dude. You just won a PGA Tour tournament... You're a top 50 golfer alive right now. You're not top 50 human beings. Sorry buddy.

Tiger Woods will play in the Masters this year

Tiger Woods and the Masters. 'cause he has said that he has not ruled out playing in the masters this year. ... The way that he said it makes me think it's on, he's right. It's on. He's loading.

LIV Golf will be defunct within five years

Do you think that that Liv will be around in five years? [Hank]: No.

The LIV Dam is about to break with Brooks Koepka's return to the PGA

Brooks is back. ... If one of [Bryson DeChambeau, Jon Rahm, or Cam Smith] flips, that's a second massive domino that it will be tough to come back from. ... The damn could break.

John Rahm will flip back to the PGA Tour

I think John Rahm's gonna come back. I don't know about Cam Smith, but Rahm feels like the next guy that's going to flip [from LIV to PGA].

LeBron James is officially obsessed with golf

He is checked out. He's got the bug. He's officially obsessed with golf. I would like to see his YouTube stats... I think he's deep into the Pop Does Sports Universe. He probably watched the Internet Invitational.

Brandel Chamblee is using bots to generate fake YouTube views for Bryson DeChambeau's content

I put him [Brandel Chamblee] on the Hot Seat because there's just no way Brandel Chamblee is this locked in... but he said, 'I have no doubt that bots are generating a lot of those views.'

Winning the Ryder Cup as a playing captain would make Keegan Bradley an all-time legend, perhaps better than winning a major

If he wins as the playing captain, you're an all time legend. All time... Winning as a playing captain might be better than winning a major. I think I could see that being the truth.

The winning score at the US Open will be over par because the course is impossible

Can we bet on the winning golfer to have a, a score that's over par? Yes... I wanna bet on winning score over par. I think this US Open is going to the course. Officially I've seen enough of the content where now I fear this course.

Charlie Woods will win more than five and a half career majors

Charlie Woods over under five and a half career majors... Over, over. Smash. Easy. Smash it easy.

Tiger Woods' career as a competitive golfer is over following his Achilles rupture

My Hot Seat is Tiger Woods... I don't know, but it's clutch foot. It's just injury after injury. It's over. It sucks, but it's over. It's probably over.

The Ryder Cup pricing is a mistake that ruins home field advantage

People are very upset about the prices for the upcoming Ryder Cup. Next summer at Bethpage... it's $750 for a day. Normally I would say golf fans probably have expendable money... but this is such a fuck you and a mistake to trying to get a home field advantage. If you price out rowdy New Yorkers who want to go to the Ryder Cup and scream heinous shit at all the Europeans, you've completely ruined this.

Matt Kuchar's stunt at the Wyndham Championship was a total douchebag move

Matt Kuchar. What a dickhead. What a douchebag. Hits into the group ahead of him on 18. And then just picks up his ball and leaves and says it's too dark. And came back on Monday to finish half a hole... it didn't win. Made people come back and sit there... Douchebag move by him.

Matt Kuchar's stunt at the Wyndham Championship was a total douchebag move

Matt Kuchar. What a dickhead. What a douchebag. Hits into the group ahead of him on 18. And then just picks up his ball and leaves and says it's too dark. And came back on Monday to finish half a hole... it didn't win. Made people come back and sit there... Douchebag move by him.

Matt Kuchar might have been taking a stand against slow play by refusing to finish on Sunday

I did see a golf journalist who had a thread breaking down why he might have been doing it... the group in front of 'em was playing super, super slow all day... maybe he was just trying to set a example of like, the guy should have been playing faster in front of them.

Donald Trump is a very impressive golfer for his age

Stick to sports. But he is a very good golfer. He did the video with Bryson [DeChambeau] and he, he was impressive... with like if you or I or PFT was playing with Bryson. It's doubtful that we would be have his [score].

Donald Trump would beat Joe Biden in a golf match even while giving him 20 strokes

Trump made a million dollar wager in a 18 hole golf match and he's gonna give him 20 strokes... like if Joe Biden doesn't accept Hot Seat. No, but like if he does accept, he's gonna get smoked.

Keegan Bradley being named Ryder Cup captain is an intentional 'make good' for his 2023 snub

It does feel like a make good, but it's, I mean, he's a great dude and he's gonna be a good captain. I just want him to be as petty as possible and like, maybe even call Zach Johnson and be like, 'Hey, you've made the Ryder Cup team, we need you on the team.' And then him be like, 'Really? That's awesome.' Like psych you bro.

Three beers is the perfect amount for playing a round of golf

Drank three beers and then the round ended and he ended up in a playoff and won the playoff... he was like, three beers are gonna make me play perfect. Like yes. It's the perfect amount. It is... for the people that say like, I need, you know, you hit a bad shot or you have a couple bad holes. You're like, I need to drink three beers.

Hank's backswing sucks

Bing bong your backswing sucks. White bow.

The winner of the US Open will shoot between minus five and minus one

No, I would like minus five to minus one. [to win]

The 2024 Masters will have an asterisk because Taylor Gooch wasn't invited

Taylor Gooch was interviewed... and he said he's going to be an asterisk. It's just a reality. Taylor Gooch will always remember as the Masters that didn't have Taylor Gooch.

The Official World Golf Ranking's decision to ignore LIV Golf is absolute bullshit

The official golf world ranking has chosen to just ignore LIV golf as a real sport or league. Shit. So LIV golf players are not gonna be able to qualify for majors and things like that... it's a problem for them when you have LIV golf players that are winning majors to then say that the tour that they play on doesn't produce players that are good enough.

Charlie Woods is on pace to win 40 majors

Charlie Woods just won a tournament. Charlie won a tournament... right now he's on pace to win 40 Majors, which is pretty incredible.

PGA Tour players should cheat because it takes 'huge balls' and is highly profitable

I kind of respect the move [of cheating]. If you're on the PGA Tour, just cheat. You can make a lot of money. I actually don't respect the move, it's kind of a shitty thing to do, but it takes some huge balls to try to do it.

Searching through a golfer's old Twitter likes after they win is 'loser energy'

Tremendous loser behavior by anyone who does this. ... I don't care what side politics you're on If you see someone have the greatest moment of their life and you immediately, like, let's go through his likes and try to figure out what he liked on Twitter. That's loser energy.

Professional golf needs to bring back visors

Visors are a good look. I think we need to bring back visors. ... Gulf Digest had a study and they say for the first time in like 40 years, nobody in professional golf that's in the top 20 is a visor guy. ... we need one guy.

Jack Nicklaus rejected a $100 million offer to join the Saudi golf league.

Jack Nicklaus rejected a hundred million to not go to the Saudi golf League. He rejected all that money because of his morals. So cool throne him.

Charlie Woods could win the Masters right now if they let him in

Charlie Woods could win the Masters right now if you wanted to. Is there a way that if they let him in, he could win it? ... Charlie Woods is gonna be the greatest. He's next up. We've always said that on this podcast. He is now he's him.

Charlie Woods will win at least two major championships in his career.

Will Charlie Woods win a major? I would say yes. Hammer absolutely. Multiple over one and a half. Yeah. Majors over for Charlie Woods. ... Just bet on him to be better than Tiger. Charlie Woods's gonna be the greatest.

Will Zalatoris made a deal with the devil to win one tournament and his injury is the cost

I'm nervous that he made a deal with the devil and the deal with the devil was let me win one. That's what I'm nervous about. And I bet on him last week to finish top 10... I'm nervous cuz it feels like the timing is [predominant].

PGA Tour Commissioner Jay Monahan overplayed his hand and had zero leverage against LIV Golf

He also overplayed his hand. Yeah, of course. And everyone's like, yeah. Okay. You know what? You know, what's better than, than winning. The fortnight challenge is getting a hundred million guaranteed. So Jay Monahan just needs to be like, listen, I fucked this one up. I'm firing myself... It's a classic case of really overplaying your hand and thinking that you had all the leverage in the world when you actually had zero.

Cam Smith is leaving the PGA Tour for the LIV Tour

My cool throne is going to be Cam Smith... He's leaving the PGA tour and going to the LIV tour. Allegedly as first reported by Pardon My Take. ... He's gonna be joining the LIV tour for a hundred million. Pretty good.

Jack Nicklaus' name is pronounced Jack 'Nick-Klaus' because of his German ancestry

Jack Nicklaus [pronounced Nick-Klaus like Santa Claus]... He rejected a hundred million dollars to not go to the Saudi golf league... I've only read his name. I only know... because I always watch golf on mute... Nikolaos. Changed it to make it [more American].

The Masters should never allow cell phones and should arrest anyone who breaks the rule

I hope they never do that [allow cell phones]. I hope they actually have like their own security staff arrest people that try to break the cell phone rule. I like Augusta as it is.

Bryson DeChambeau turned down playing with Brooks Koepka because he's a pussy

It's my understanding as a reporter that Bryson [DeChambeau] actively turned it down because he's a pussy and Batman wouldn't eat him.

I will do everything I can to help Max Homa game the new PGA bonus system for extra money

We are absolutely going to do everything that we can to get Max Homa this extra money. Because Brooks [Koepka] will do it on his own... Max might need some help from us. [The PGA] can't get in trouble for defrauding the PGA Tour.

John Rahm's viral skipping shot at the Masters might be doctored

John Rahm hit a shot that walked on water at Augusta... I think that the Masters needs some more Buzz around it because it's not being held at the traditional time. I think that maybe there might be some monkey business afoot here somebody who's better at the internet than me look at the footage and tell me if you think that it's doctored at all.

Bryson DeChambeau lied about his dog to get internet clout

Bryson DeChambeau got him Duffy big time in a massive massive internet controversy. He took a picture with their golden retriever, Trigger is a name of this dog. And he said this dog Trigger was here and helped me win the amateur open back in 2015. Well record scratch, it turns out the Trigger, the sweet boy, was born in 2017. So Bryson got him tied up trying to chase them internet clout like a dog chasing his tail. Got caught big time.

A golf match featuring OJ Simpson and Tiger Woods would be the highest-rated television show of all time

Tiger Woods and OJ Simpson as a team? Who is not watching that? I do believe that that would be the highest-rated television show of all time.

Brooks Koepka ghosting Tiger Woods shows he cares more about winning the Blake of the Year award than anything else

Tiger texted him [Brooks Koepka] asking to play a round of golf before the British Open. He just ghosted him. So he cares more about the Blake of the Year than he does about Tiger Woods.

If Brooks Koepka wins the 2019 US Open, he is the 'new Tiger'

I want Brooks to win... If Brooks wins this one, he's the new Tiger. I'm going to say it. He's a Blake and a Tiger and a Brooks.

The Masters deserves all the hype it gets and cannot be overhyped

You can't overhype the Masters. Take your microphone off. That's a bad take. The Masters deserve all the hype.

Patrick Reed's Masters menu looks like what a 14-year-old thinks an adult dinner is.

This menu really is like what a 14 year old would think an adult's menu looks like. He basically was forced to be like well I like steak and and I don't really like anything else. I like macaroni and cheese. I'm surprised chicken fingers weren't on here.

Illegal streams for the Tiger vs Phil pay-per-view will lead to a hacking bloodbath

If you are a hacker on the internet, the Tiger and Phil pay-per-view illegal streams will be a field day. Because I would imagine a lot of 50-year-old white dudes trying to find a Twitch stream will end up with a lot of hacking... It's going to be a bloodbath on the internet.

The PGA Tour is ridiculous for investigating Bryson DeChambeau for using a compass

[Speaker 1] (16:38-16:41) My hot seat is Bryson DeChambeau. [Speaker 1] (16:41-16:47) The PGA Tour is investigating him and trying to figure out whether it was legal of him to use a compass or not. [Speaker 1] (16:48-16:49) What century are we in? [Speaker 3] (17:16-17:21) I love this that it's a compass is now an illegal tool in golf.